by Peter Brown
Yoko screamed hysterically until the police arrived. The first at the scene was Patrolman Anthony Palma. Against Yoko’s wishes, he turned John onto his back. “Red is all I saw,” Palma said. “The guy is dying. Let’s get him out of here.” By then a police cruiser had arrived, and Palma and Officer James Moran carried John to the backseat. They took off for Roosevelt Hospital with their sirens blaring. Yoko followed in a second police car, repeating over and over, “It’s not true, tell me it’s not true!”
On the way to the hospital, Officer Moran looked down at John Lennon in his lap and couldn’t believe it. “Do you know who you are?” Moran whispered to him. John moaned and nodded his head. It was his last gesture. By the time they reached the emergency room of Roosevelt Hospital, over 80 percent of John’s blood volume had been lost from seven massive wounds in his neck and shoulder. They raced him into the emergency area, and several surgeons and nurses worked on him feverishly for half an hour. According to Dr. Stephen Lynn, the hospital’s director of emergency services, “It wasn’t possible to resuscitate him by any means.”
When Dr. Lynn went out into the waiting room, Yoko asked frantically, “Where is my husband? I want to be with my husband! He would want me to be with him!”
“We have very bad news,” Dr. Lynn told her. “Unfortunately, in spite of massive efforts, your husband is dead. There was no suffering at the end.”
“Are you saying he is sleeping?” Yoko sobbed.
She was back at the Dakota shortly after midnight. Alone.
She called three people that night. She called Julian, who had lost the father he had never known; she called Aunt Mimi, who lost the little boy she once pretended was her own; and she called Paul, who lost the chance to redeem part of his soul.
On December 10 the following letter appeared in newspapers around the world. It was from Yoko and Sean.
I told Sean what happened. I showed him the picture of his father on the cover of the paper and explained the situation. I took Sean to the spot where John lay after he was shot. Sean wanted to know why the person shot John if he liked John. I explained that he was probably a confused person. Sean said we should find out if he was confused or if he really had meant to kill John. I said that was up to the court. He asked what court—a tennis court or a basketball court? That’s how Sean used to talk with his father. They were buddies. John would have been proud of Sean if he had heard this. Sean cried later. He also said “Now Daddy is part of God. I guess when you die you become much more bigger because you’re part of everything.”
Yoko still lives at the Dakota, though many of her friends imagine it would be too painful to pass every day the spot where John was killed. Indomitable and determined, she leads a busy, productive life. Often, she returns to the studio to work on old tapes she made with John, or to record new songs herself. A few months after John’s death she began an unlikely friendship with a young man named Sam Habitoy, a sometimes antique dealer and interior decorator. For a time rumors were rampant that Yoko would marry Habitoy, or that they were already married, but Yoko denies all this. She has a full-time job living with John’s memory, and no man will ever replace him, in any way.
John’s shadow, his very presence, is inescapable wherever she goes. Indeed, she speaks of John all the time, always in the present tense, as if he’s just in the other room, about to knock on the door. She is publicly very philosophical about his death. When asked why all the psychics and astrologers hadn’t warned them about the night of December 8 under the archway of the Dakota, she says they had. Not that specific date, perhaps, but that John always had bad luck in his future. Some fates, she says, cannot be changed.
I can’t remember anything
without a sadness
So deep that it hardly
becomes known to me
—From a poem John wrote
in a letter to
Stu Sutcliffe in 1961
Index
Abbey Road
Alfie
All Things Must Pass
“All You Need Is Love”
Anderson, Helen
Andrews, Nancy
Anthony, Les
Apple Corp.
boutique liquidated
budget for
discoveries
disorganization of
financial reorganization of
mass firing at
recording studios of
as talent agency
Armstrong, Neil
Aronowitz, Al
Asher, Clare
Asher, Jane
acting career of
on Maharishi’s ashram
Paul’s courtship of
Paul’s separation from
Asher, Margaret
Asher, Petern
in Apple Corp.
Asher, Richardn
Aspinall, Neil
in America
in Apple Corp.
in Beatles’ breakup
on Maharishi’s ashram
on Mal’s death
as road manager
in Yoko’s pursuit of John
Aspinall, Suzie Orenstein
ATV
Babbs, Rev. Thurman H.
“Baby’s in Black”
Bacall, Lauren
Bach, Barbara
Bacharach, Burt
Bacon, Leslie
Bad Boy
Baez, Joan
Baggism
Bag Productions
Bailey, David
“Ballad of John and Yoko, The”
Band on the Run
Bangladesh concert
Bardot, Brigitte
Barrett, Brian
Barrow, Tony
on global tours
Barry, Gene
Bart, Lionel
Bassanini, Roberto
BBC (British Broadcasting Corporation)
Beach Boys
Beat Brothers
Beatles:
in America
amphetamine consumption of
“backwards” tapes used by
drugs renounced by
films ofn
financial success of
first English recording sessions of
first failure of
first hit song of
first recordings of
first separation of
first television appearance of
first tour of
formal breakup of
gang violence toward
global tours of
Greek island scheme of
hairstyle of
Hamburg trips of
John’s wedding and
LSD experiences of
luxury cars of
on Maharishi’s ashram
marijuana discovered by
marital problems of
mass hysteria over
MBE award presented to
merchandising business of
in move to London
musical illiteracy of
naming of
national popularity attained by
Paul’s withdrawal from
privacy invaded
professionalism learned by
promotional tactics for
recording contract offered to
recording contract renegotiated for
recording contracts sought by
reunion, talk of
Royal Command Performance of
sense of unity
sexual opportunities for
in Swinging London
TM studies of
as venereal disease victims
visual image of
writing assignments of
(See also Harrison, George; Lennon, John Ono; McCartney, Paul; Starr, Ringo)
Beatles, The (The White Album)
Beatles Anthology, The
Beatles for Sale
Beatles Monthly Fan Club Magazine
Beaucoup of Blues
“Be Bop a Lula”
Beeching, Lord
Bee Gees
Behm, Marc
Bennett, Barbara
Bennett, Tony
Bernstein, Leonard
Bernstein, Sid,
Berry, Chuck
Best, Kathy
Best, Mona
Best, Pete
fired from Beatles
Hamburg trips of
musical weaknesses of
Bhagavad-Gita
Bhaktivededanta Swami
Billboard
Billy J. Kramer and the Dakotas
Black, Cilla (Cilla White)
in break from Brian
Brian’s development of
Brian’s relationship with
Blackboard Jungle
Black Dyke Mills Brass Band
Black House
Blake, Peter
Blankenship, Jessica
Bloomfield, Mike
Blow-Up
Body Count (Schwartz)
Bolan, Marc
Book of the Dead, Tibetan
Born to Boogie
Bottoms
Bowie, David
Boyd, Jenny
in John’s estrangement from Cynthia
on Maharishi’s ashram
marriage of
Boyd, Paula
Brando, Marlon
Britton, Geoff
Bron, Eleanor
Brothers, Joyce
Brower, John
Brown, Peter
Bryce-Hamner
Brydor
Butler, R. A.
Byrne, Kiki
Byrne, Nicky
Cage, John
Caine, Michael
Calder, Tony
Caldwell, Iris
Callahan, James
Calley, John
Cameo-Parkway
Campbell, William
“Can’t Buy Me Love”
Capitol Records
advertising campaigns of
Capp, Al
Carroll, Lewis
Carson, Johnny
Cass and the Casanovas
Catcher in the Rye (Salinger)
Caveman
Cavett, Dick
Cellarful of Noise, A (Epstein)
Chamberlain, Richard
Chandler, Chas
Chang, Barry
Chapman, Gloria Abe
Chapman, Mark David
background of
Charles, prince of Wales
Chicago Seven
Chiffons
Clapton, Eric
heroin addiction of
marriage of
Pattie’s relationship with
Clayton, Eddie
Cleave, Maureen
“Cold Turkey”
Collins, Joan
“Come Together”
Connolly, Ray
Constellation
Contact
Cooke, Sam
Cooper, Alice
Corman, Charles
Cormopolitan
Coury, Al
Cousins, Eric (pseudonym)
Coventry Cathedral sculpture exhibit
Cowan, Norman
Cox, Kyoko
in custody dispute
Cox, Melinda
Cox, Tony
as born again Christian
Yoko’s divorce from
Craven, Jay
Crisp, Sir Frank
Cruikshank, Robin
Daily Mail
Daily Mirror
Daily Variety
Dali, Salvador
Daltrey Roger
Darin, Bobby
Dark Horse
Datebook
Davies, Hunter
Davis, Angela
Davis, Rennie
“Day in the Life, A”
Delfont, Bernard
DeLillo, Richard
Deneuve, Catherine
De Paul, Lyndsey
Derry and the Seniors
De Shannon, Jackie
Dupuis, Hector
Dietrich, Marlene
Disc
Donegan, Lonnie
Donovan
on Maharishi’s ashram
Donovan, Terrance
“Don’t Worry, Kyoko, Mummy’s
Only Looking for Her Hand in the Snow”
Doran, Terry
in Apple Corp.
car dealership of
Dorsey, Tommy
Double Fantasy
Douglas, Kirk
Doyle, Alice (pseudonym)
“Do You Want to Know a Secret?”
Drake, Pete
“Dr. Robert”
Drury Lane Arts Lab
Dunbar, John
Duvall, Shelly
Dylan, Bob
Eastman, John
in Beatles’ breakup
as legal advisor
Eastman, Lee
in Beatles’ breakup
as legal advisor
Easton, Eric
Easy Rider
Eckhorn, Peter
Elephants Memory
Elizabeth II, queen of England
Elliot, Cass
Ellis, Geoffrey
Brian’s death and
Elvis (Goldman)
EMI
Beatles’ contract with
Beatles’ introduction to
Beatles’ relationship with
contract renegotiated with
as distributor for Apple Corp.
Sergeant Pepper cover and
(See also Capitol Records; Lockwood, Sir Joseph; Martin, George)
Epstein, Brian
as actor
in America
in army
autobiography of
background of
Beatles’ film career and
Beatles’ first encounter with
Epstein, Brian (continued)
Beatles’ first separation and
Beatles’ Hamburg trip and
Beatles signed by
Beatles’ visual image developed by
blackmail attempts on
booking company established by
Cynthia’s pregnancy and
death of
in detoxification program
diversified operations of
drug dependence of
fatalism of
father’s death and
as financial manager
gala party of
as gambler
on global tours
Grade agency vs.
homosexuality of
John desired by
John’s “Jesus” remarks and
John’s marriage and
LSD use admitted by
marijuana first used by
MBE award and
in merchandising business
mood swings ofé
in move to London
Paul’s anger with
professional insecurities of
promotional tactics of
recording contract obtained by
recording contracts sought by
suicide attempt of
theatrical enterprises of
on vacation with John
Epstein, Clive
Brian’s death and
NEMS division opened by
NEMS sale and
Epstein, Harry
death of
Epstein, Isaac
Epstein, Queenie (Malka)
in Brian’s childhood
Brian’s death and
at Brian’s gala party
Brian’s homosexuality discovered by
husband’s death and
promotional work of
Erection
Esquire
Evans, Mal
in America
in Apple Corp.
background of
death of
as drug procurer
on global tours
on Maharishi’s ashram
Evans, Paul
Evans, Peter
Evening Standard
Everett, Kenny
Everly Brothers
“Every Night”
Evila
Extra Texture-Read All About It
Faithfull, Marianne
Family Way, The
Farell, Raymond
Farley, Chris
Faron and the Flamingos
Farrow, John
Farrow, Mia
Farrow, Tia
Fascher, Horst
Fawcett, Anthony
Feinberg, Rabbi Abraham
Fielding, John
Financial Times
Finley, Charlie O.
First Four, The
Fleetwood, Mick
Flood, John
Fly
Fonda, Peter
“For No One”
Four Elements Suite, The
461 Ocean Boulevard
Francis, Connie
Fraser, Robert
Freeman, Bob
Fromme, Squeaky
“From Me to You”
Fury, Billy
Gallway, John
Garagiola, Joe
Garland, Judy
Gay Liberation Book
Gentle, Johnny
Gerry and the Pacemakers
Gerson, Ben
Get Back
Gibb, Russ
Gillespie, Dizz
blackmail attempt of
Ginsberg, Allen
“Give Peace a Chance”
Goldman, Albert
Goodbye Baby and Amen (Evans)
Goodman, Lord
Goodnight Vienna
Gordon,Ian
Gordon Bell and the Bobby Bell Rockers
Gormé, Eydie
Grade, Leslie
Grade, Lew
in Northern Songs takeover bid
Graham, Billy
Grapefruit (Ono)
Graustark, Barbara
Grease
Greaves, Elsie Gleave
Greaves, Harry
Green.H.
Greene, James
Griffiths, Eric
Guru Dev
Habitoy, Sam
Haley, Bill
Hamill, Pete
Hard Day’s Night, A
Harmon, Jeremiah
Harrison, Dhani (son)
Harrison, George
adolescence of
antidrug feelings of
assassination fears of
attack on
autobiography of
Bangladesh concert of
Beatles’ first tour and
death of
divorce of
in drug bust
film investments of
first marriage of (See Harrison Clapton, Pattie Boyd)
Friar Park home of
Hamburg trips of
Indian music studies of
John’s early relationship with
marital problems of
Paul’s early relationship with
plagiarism suit against
remarriage of
solo albums of
upbringing of
Harrison, Harold (father)
Harrison, Louise (mother)
