by Joyce Lavene
“Sure.” Bonnie agreed. “See you later. Nice to meet you, Petey.”
After they were gone, Bonnie cleaned up in the tree area so it was ready for the group that was coming. She walked through the fragrant lines of fir trees, inhaling deeply of their scent as she brushed her hands along the soft needles. It was something she’d enjoyed doing as a child. The smell was calming to her. Nothing else in the world had that effect.
She walked a long way, conscious of the time before she started back. Her nose and fingers were cold, but she felt wonderfully invigorated, more than she had in years. It was good to be home.
The stag she’d seen earlier walked into her path. She knew this was the same one she’d seen two days ago when a short Cherokee man followed him, carrying a wood staff. He wore a white robe that went to the ground. He appeared ancient, with a heavily wrinkled and wizened face. His hair was almost as long as the robe he wore and just as white.
“Good afternoon, Unega Awinita.” He bowed his head to her. “We have much to speak of this day.”
Chapter Thirteen
Bonnie had left her gun in the house. She wasn’t on duty, but she knew she should always be prepared. Trouble didn’t respect her time off. Still, she didn’t get that kind of impression from him. He looked harmless.
“I mean you no harm, Unega Awinita.”
“I’m sorry. I think you have me confused with someone else. I’m Bonnie Tuttle. This is my family’s Christmas tree farm. Would you like a tree?”
“Why should I cut a tree when I have them all for my enjoyment?” He raised his staff high as he spoke and cast an eye upon the forest around him.
She shivered, as the trees did, at his words. An eerie feeling seeped into her.
The old man put his hand on the stag’s neck. “Something puzzles you?”
“Only why you’re here. What can I do for you, sir?”
He laughed as he stroked the stag’s neck. “She asks what she can do for us, when it is we who have come to help her.”
The big stag snorted and nodded its massive head, as though he was laughing with the old man. He pawed the ground, plumes of his breath freezing in the air.
“Okay. I’ll bite. What have you come to help me do? And why are you calling me Unega Awinita?” Bonnie stared them both down as she tried to understand what was going on.
“We have come to help you protect all creatures in the wild, as you were meant to do.” He continued to smile at her. “As for your name, it is as it has always been. We call you the white fawn when you return to us, as you have since before time began.”
Weirder still. She put her hands in her pockets and tried to think what to say next. Obviously this was some mistake, or he was expecting someone else. Maybe he even got the idea because she was a Wildlife Agent. Anything was possible.
He hadn’t tried to hurt her or the stag. She needed to reason with him, sure she could convince him that he was confused. She could ask him in for some hot cider. They could talk, and he could tell her where he lived.
“I see you are confused.” He graciously bowed his head again to her. “We have a tale in these mountains. It is of a young, white woman who has endured great sorrow and has used her pain to help those around her. She has been reborn to us many times as Unega Awinita—the white fawn. She speaks with the wolves and the deer. She hears even the tiniest cries of the turtle and the chipmunk. She has compassion for them all and is their great protector.”
Bonnie closed her mouth when she realized it was open after hearing the story. She wasn’t sure what to say next and decided against inviting him into her home. He might be dangerous. What if he decided she wasn’t doing her job as a great protector?
“I see. What’s your name? Where do you live? Can I call someone for you?”
Again he laughed at her. With an agility that should’ve been beyond him, the Cherokee man leapt on the back of the stag. “What is my name? You may call me sun, moon, or rain. Where do I live? I live here in the woods, free of restraint or understanding. I need no one but you by my side. Together we will protect the weak.”
The old man nodded to the stag, and the animal bounded away through the field of Christmas trees.
She hadn’t been sure when she’d first seen him on the road coming into Sweet Pepper, but this time she knew he was real. He was probably crazy or demented. She hoped she could ask around and find out if anyone else knew him.
“There you are.” Matthew came running through the trees leading to her from the house. “Your group of Christmas tree hunters are here. I should have taken them for myself, but I did the honorable thing of coming to get you because Rose asked. Next time, they’ll be buying my trees.”
Bonnie was stumped for what to say. She stood there staring at him, wanting to tell him what she’d just seen but not finding the words that wouldn’t make her sound crazy.
“Are you okay?” He came closer. “You look strange. You’re not going to faint or anything are you? Are you sick?”
“No.” She finally got one word out and shook her head to clear it. “I just saw an old man and a big stag.”
“Why didn’t you say so? I didn’t know you were looking for symbolism out here. The last vision I had in my trees was a bluebird. Obviously it wasn’t real since it was winter, but I’m still trying to figure out what it means.”
She grabbed his jacket lapels. “No. Really. There was a little old Cherokee man in a white robe riding a huge stag.”
“Maybe you should go inside and have some hot cider. I’ll take care of your tree buyers. You’ve been through a lot since you got here.”
Bonnie let go of his jacket. “Sorry. Maybe that’s it. I don’t know what to think. I saw him on my way into town. He called me Unega Awinita again today. I don’t know what’s wrong with me.”
“He called you that?” He glanced around. “Where is he? Where did he go?”
“Not you too. I’m not encouraging delusion. Let’s go back to the house before my sale drives away.”
Matthew put his hands on her arms. “Is it that you know the legend? Because I don’t think he’d call you Unega Awinita. Although the animals listen to you.” He stared hard into her face. “Are you the white fawn?”
“Are you making fun of me?” she demanded hotly. “I didn’t ask for this to happen—and I’m not completely sure it did. But you aren’t allowed to make fun of me about it.”
“Yoo-hoo!” a woman sang out from the end of the row of trees. “Are you Bonnie Tuttle? We’d like to get our trees and get out of the valley before dark, please.”
“I’m not making fun of you, Bonnie,” Matthew said. “Really. We should talk about this.”
“After I sell my trees.” She glared at him. “But there better not be a smile on your face when we talk about it.”
“There won’t be.” He followed her down the row toward the other woman. “Okay, maybe there will be, but I won’t be making fun of you. I swear.”
“We’ll see,” she promised and then smiled as she greeted her customer. “I’m so glad you could make it. Let’s get those trees ready.”
Matthew helped with the trees, though she didn’t really need it. Mrs. Barnes had brought three big students to help load the truck. Bonnie thought it might be possible that Matthew didn’t want to leave until he talked to her. He kept glancing at her as he was working.
She should never have told him. It had just made it worse.
When all fourteen trees were loaded and paid for, Bonnie dropped down on the front steps, exhausted. It was a good day for sales, but she was using muscles she hadn’t used in a while cutting and loading trees. Of course, she’d also been knocked around by Vince Stookey too. No wonder she was sore and tired.
“I want you to tell me everything that Dustu said to you.” Matthew sat next to her. “No one has seen him in years. Some thought he was dead. I thought he was only a legend.”
“I don’t want to talk about that right now,” she replied. “Maybe tomorro
w.”
“This is a big deal, Bonnie. Everyone is going to want to know about it.”
His words made her cringe. “Please don’t tell anyone else. I don’t care if other people want to know. I just want to forget about it and sit by the fire looking at Harvey’s files.”
“Tonight, right? Tomorrow we can tell everyone.”
“No. I don’t ever want to tell anyone but you, and I wouldn’t have told you if it wasn’t so astonishing at the time. I’m a private person, Matthew. I don’t want to be laughed at or made fun of by everyone.”
His dark eyes challenged hers. “That’s asking a lot. But I’ll go along with it, since I’m sure you’ll change your mind. It’s a huge honor to be addressed as Unega Awinita by one of our elders. It’s not a title given lightly.”
“I understand.” She got up slowly from the stairs as Peter ran out of the house. “I’ll see you tomorrow. Bye, Peter.”
The boy had been with Rose again while his father had been helping her. Bonnie waved as they got in the truck and left the house. Then she went inside, took off her jacket and tennis shoes, and sat down by the fire.
“What should we eat for dinner tonight?” her mother asked.
“Something hot,” Bonnie replied sleepily. “With something hot to drink. I’m still freezing.”
* * *
It was dark outside when she woke. The clock on the mantel struck seven p.m. Bonnie yawned and got to her feet.
The little wolf sat silently between her and the kitchen.
“What are you doing in here? How did you get out of the kennel?”
“Oh. You’re finally awake,” Rose said. “I’ve had your dinner warming on the stove. I was starving and ate without you, I’m afraid. But I’ll sit with you while you eat. Is your wolf hungry?”
“He’s not my wolf. Did you let him out of his kennel?” She walked to her coat hanging by the door and pulled out the lock.
“No, but he’s been very good just watching you sleep. Do you think he’d eat a corn fritter? I don’t know if beans would be good for him. I have a lovely Apple Brown Betty made too, but probably not for the wolf.”
The wolf still didn’t move. He stared at Bonnie with great intent. He wasn’t old enough to hunt, not that he would hunt in this environment. She was surprised he wasn’t hiding or looking for a way out of the house.
“Are you hungry?” she asked him.
He licked his lips but otherwise stayed still.
“I think that’s a yes,” Rose said. “I’ve got some leftover chicken. I bet he’d like that.”
“All right. Thanks. Let me get him in the laundry room again.”
“He probably won’t go with you if you don’t have the chicken,” Rose instructed.
“We’ll see.” Bonnie started walking toward the hall. The little wolf followed on her heels like a puppy. She looked in the kennel. The door was open, but she couldn’t understand how. “If you’re hungry, you have to go back in there.”
She stood to one side and the pup went back in the kennel and sat down, as though he’d only come to get her and let her know that he was hungry. She smiled and put on her gloves to feed him. He looked healthy enough. Maybe she should let him out on his own in the next few days. She didn’t know why, but he seemed already attached to her. Before she left, she latched the kennel and locked it, slipping the key onto her keyring.
Bonnie sat down to eat after that. Rose sat with her, and they talked about ordinary things. The corn fritters were delicious, and so was the apple brown Betty. The kitchen was attached to the dining room and living room. She could still hear the crackling fire in the hearth. It was exactly what she needed to take a deep breath and relax after the insanity that had been the last two days.
“Matthew Brown Elk and his brother are very nice,” Rose commented with a cup of tea in her hand. “It was such a shame when little Peter’s mother decided to leave. How could anyone leave their child?”
“People do crazy things sometimes,” Bonnie said. “There isn’t always a way to understand it.”
Her mother sighed. “What about that man you were seeing in Alabama? Was he nice? Is he going to come after you?”
“He was very nice.” Bonnie smiled when she thought about Saul Chase. “He’s not going to come after me. He’s in love with someone else. That happens too sometimes. We don’t always love the right people, do we?”
“No.” Rose’s gaze was soft and far away. “The heart doesn’t always want what it can have.”
Bonnie leaned closer to her mother.
“Was Eric Gamlyn my brother’s father?” she asked softly. There was no one else to hear it but it seemed like a subject that should be discussed quietly.
“Yes.”
Unsure how to respond, Bonnie tried to mirror her mother’s calm demeanor. She had expected to have to work on her a little to get the answer, but instead Rose just sat there, sipping her tea.
“Eric never knew. He left the next day and was gone for a long time. I didn’t know how to get in touch with him—no cell phones in those days.” Rose smiled. “Not that I’m complaining. I loved Wendel too but in a different way. Before you ask, he knew that he wasn’t Eric’s father. He didn’t care. He was a father to my son. That was all that mattered.”
“Wow. Have you told my brother about this?”
“No.” Rose held her pink mouth primly. “Why stir up old, painful memories? That’s why I never told Chief Gamlyn when he came back. My life had moved on. I wanted to tell him, but it seemed too late. It would have only been confusing for our Eric.”
Bonnie took it all in but found it difficult to believe that her mother had held such a huge secret inside her for so long. She covered Rose’s delicate hand with her own larger, callused one.
“Now what about you?” Rose asked. Her eyes had lost that dreamy expression. “Have you moved on with your life, sweetheart? Have you put all your painful memories behind you?”
“I put that behind me when I left the valley ten years ago.”
“Does that mean you’ve made peace with it, or is it going to haunt you now that you’re back?”
“I don’t know.” Bonnie sipped her tea. “Even in Alabama, not a day went by when I didn’t think about how old my baby would have been if he’d survived. It’s not something you can forget—losing a child—even though I didn’t know him. He was still part of me.”
Rose gripped her daughter’s hand tightly. “You have to move on too. I know it was hard on you. I understand why you left. All those old ladies gossiping about you and the baby, and you barely out of high school.”
A lump formed in Bonnie’s throat and tears came to her eyes. It still hurt after all this time.
“What about him?” Rose asked. “Do you ever hear from him?”
“No.”
Him was, of course, the baby’s father. Bonnie didn’t know if her mother had ever said her boyfriend’s name out loud after finding out that she was pregnant. Davis Leon. They’d dated through high school after growing up together in the valley. On graduation night, they’d driven into Pigeon Forge and rented a hotel room. It had all been very romantic and seemed legitimate since they’d been planning their wedding for months.
But as soon as she’d found out she was pregnant, Davis had advised her to get rid of it. He’d said a baby would only ruin their chances for the future.
Brokenhearted that he could so easily choose to end the life of their child, Bonnie had told him she never wanted to see him again with all the passion and drama of her eighteen-year-old heart. He’d begged her to reconsider. But she’d told him she and their baby were a package deal.
Davis had left town the next day—with his parents’ blessing. They’d said it was all her fault, that she’d seduced their son with the idea of trapping him in marriage. Word had spread quickly, and Bonnie had to endure long months of coping with Davis’s betrayal and her old friends taunting and belittling her.
All that had come to an end the nig
ht her baby was born. It was too early for him, the doctor had said. He’d never had a chance to live.
“I’m so glad you’re back,” Rose said. “I can’t tell you how much I hated that you left to train as a Wildlife Agent so quickly after the baby’s death. You had no time to mourn. There were so many times I wished I could have held you in my arms and comforted you.”
Bonnie forced herself not to cry. She’d cried rivers and oceans over that part of her life in the last ten years. The hurt never went away.
“I love you, Mom. And I’m a different woman now. I don’t care about small-town gossip anymore. I’m ready to get on with my life from here.”
“That’s wonderful.” Her mother got up to clear the table. “Because Matthew Brown Elk and his brother are both single.”
“Really?” Bonnie laughed, the tension broken. “Matchmaking already?”
Chapter Fourteen
Bonnie spent the rest of the evening looking through Harvey’s papers. There was nothing in any of them about finding a ruby. She really didn’t think there would be. Tomorrow she’d ask his family if they knew about the ruby and his plans for the future. She looked up rubies that had been found in North Carolina and Tennessee. There had been several stones found in the Smoky Mountains that had been worth some money. Most of them weren’t recent finds. She wondered exactly how big a ruby would be that would allow Harvey to purchase a million-dollar beach house?
It made sense that he was going to retire if he thought he had a fortune. Where had he kept the stone? Had he showed it around town to people like Vince who wanted to get part of the fortune?
Around midnight, she went to bed and fell asleep right away. She had a strange dream about Eric Gamlyn. He was cooking something in her mother’s kitchen. He was tall and strong with her brother’s bright blond hair and unearthly blue eyes.
He turned when she walked into the kitchen. “Good morning. Pancakes for breakfast?”
She woke up just as she was about to answer.
