by Dawn Gray
And with that, Michael closed the door, leaving me in the room with Julian, who was still standing there, looking at me, with quiet eyes.
“I wanted to apologize for the way that I reacted to your question.” He spoke up, after a moment of odd silence between us. “I should have explained better.”
“You should have explained something, instead of walking out with a simple “I'm sorry, Caitlyn”, which was pretty stupid because I've heard how sorry people were my whole life. It was always “I'm sorry your an orphan”, or, “I'm sorry you don't have a real family” or some dumb thing like that.” I answered and watched him walk over. He stood only about a foot from me, with his hands on his hips and I couldn't do anything but stare at him. “Why are you real? Why, on earth, did I dream big enough to bring you to life? Why now, when I have a husband and a son? Why not before, when I had no one, but you were there, weren't you? And, I forgot you.”
“It wasn't your fault.” Julian whispered. I opened my mouth to ask him how he would know, but he raised his hand, quieting me. “Not now, this is not the right time, but soon, I'll tell you everything you want to know.” He reached out, with shaky hands, and touched my face, gently. “Right now, I want to hold you, so badly it hurts, just to make sure you're real.”
I laughed at him, closing my eyes as his fingers seemed to blaze a trail of fire on my skin. “That was the first thing I asked Michael when I saw him.”
I could feel Julian as he leaned down towards me, coming close enough that I could feel his breath on me, and hear it in my ears. Tenderly, as I stood there with my hands on his hips, I felt little kisses on my skin and it made me shiver as his lips caressed my cheeks and my neck. As his arms wrapped around me, guilt flashed through me and I pushed him, gently away.
“Julian, stop.” I whispered to him, and then looked up into his eyes. “I can't do this.”
“It's alright, Cait. I understand.” He told me, quietly.
“How can you when I'm not even sure I do?” I backed away and sat on the bed. “I don't want to lead you on, because I do have a husband, and a child.”
“Tell me about him.” Julian sat next to me as I slid up and sat against the headboard.
“There's not much to tell, really. Robert is a pilot with a private company and is gone every other week flying people to whatever exotic location they want to go to.” I answered trying to sound enthusiastic about the whole situation. Julian nodded then stretched his arms above his head and let them drop.
“Sounds convenient.” He whispered. “How did you meet him?”
“Three years ago Connie, Beth and I decided to go to a college party that Laura's boyfriend was holding and Beth, being a party girl, got completely drunk and it was Robert that drove us home.”
“Three years, and you already have a child?” I looked at him as he stared into the fire that was burning a few feet away. It seemed that he caught every one of my flaws, and it made him look at me when I sighed, loudly.
“I'm not being judgmental, Cait, I was just thinking.” He whispered. I shrugged.
“I'm not proud of my stupidity, Julian.” I answered and placed my hand on his shoulder. “I admit that I made a mistake, but that mistake gave me one of my most valuable treasures and I wouldn't trade Damien for anything in the world.” I watched him nod, but he wouldn't look at me. “Anyway, after I found out that I was pregnant, we ran off to Vermont and got married by a Justice of the Peace in a quick ceremony. We've had our problems, and we still do, but no matter what I feel at this moment, I can't help but think about my son and how I promised that no matter what he wouldn't be without his parents, even if that means my happiness.”
“So, you're unhappy?” Julian looked up at me, took my hand off his shoulder and kissed it as he held it gently. “Damien won't be without his father, Caitlyn. Robert seems responsible enough, since he married you to give your son legitimacy.”
“That wasn't the point of getting married.” I answered. “And,” I said, looking into his eyes, “I am happy.”
“Okay.” He got up off the bed and walked over to the mantel. “Does he know that you're down here? Did you tell him that you were looking for me?”
“No and no. I told him that I was going to my grandmother's and that her phone had been disconnected and if I had told him about you, he would have thought I had flipped my lid.” I laughed and shook my head. “I wasn't sure if you really existed to begin with, why would I want my husband to feel threatened by something, or someone I wasn't even sure was there.”
“But, I am here, so, now what are you going to do?” He asked, looking over at me.
“How about a shower?” I questioned. I watched Julian's face light up and I could almost hear what he was thinking. “Alone, Julian.”
“Well, in that case, the bathroom is across the hall and I'm going to bed.” He smiled and walked over to me, where he planted a gentle kiss on my cheek, letting his lips linger there just a bit too long, for I felt the heat that his body let off and I began to long for it. “Goodnight, Caitlyn.” He whispered in my ear, his breath warm against my skin, and then he backed away and walked out the door.
“Goodnight.” I whispered back, as the door closed behind him.
4
As I turned the water off, after letting it fill up the tub, I sank down into the warm water that surrounded me and closed my eyes. I thought about the conversation that I had just finished with Julian about my husband and about the choices I had made that got me to where I was now, an accomplished author with a two year old son and a marriage that was based on the fact that I was pregnant. It wasn't that I didn't love Robert, because I did, but it was that feeling underneath the love, a resentful feeling, not only for him being gone half the year on trips that gave him access to beautiful women, and Robert was a very attractive man, but also the fact that I knew he had recently confessed to having an affair that made me think that nothing with Julian would be wrong.
I sighed, as I opened my eyes and stared at the ceiling. What was I thinking? I couldn't have an affair with Julian, though the thought was quite enticing, because I had Damien to think about. Robert would threaten to take him away from me, which he had already done, and the fact that I didn't have a steady job that brought in the income needed to support him would be held against me and I couldn't lose my son.
After thinking about all of this, I realized that there wasn't much that I had to hold on to. I was sinking, and fast, into a world of supernatural beings, things that weren't supposed to exist, but did. This thought frightened me and I got out of the tub faster than I ever thought I could. Wrapped in a terry cloth bathrobe, that came to my knees, and dripping from the fact that my hair was still wet, I made my way up to the third floor bedroom that I knew Julian occupied. The door had been made to look like part of the wall, but with just a slight push on the edge of the seam; it popped open wide enough to get my hand in.
“Julian?” I asked, as I stepped into the room; at first I didn't see him standing in a dark corner, until I stood next to the bed, and turned towards the fireplace. He stepped out towards me, wearing nothing but a pair of black cotton pants, which I assumed he was going to sleep in. I stared at his face for what seemed like eternity as he stood there looking at me. The fire made his skin look as if it were glistening and thoughts of running my hands over his defined chest and abs made my face flush with a strange heat as I looked away. I felt his hand on my neck, and for a moment I closed my eyes, but what I had to ask him made me turn back and look up into his eyes as they glowed an odd red color. I waited only a moment more before I placed my hand against his chest and sighed. “What am I?”
“I thought you'd never ask.” He smiled at me, and then gestured to the bed, but I stopped.
“I didn't come up here to be seduced by you, you know.” I said, stepping back a bit, but still taking in the whole view of him. “I came up here to find out the truth.”
“And, I can give that to you, but you have to trust me.” He
whispered. I shook my head, knowing in my heart that even though I had only met him, again, for the first time that afternoon, that I trusted him fully, I couldn't quite get up the nerve to follow it.
“What, exactly, are you proposing to do to help me?” I asked him. Julian smiled.
“You don't trust me, then?” He smiled. I shook my head again.
“It's not that I don't trust you, Jules. It's that I don't trust me.” I turned and closed my eyes, facing the direction of the fireplace. “I was sitting in the bathtub, thinking about our talk earlier about Robert, and I’ve come to the conclusion, as scary as it might be, that nothing, except my son, was holding me back from giving in to whatever the pull is that I feel towards you, but my son is a big reason because if I ever did give in and Robert found out,” I turned back to him, “I could lose my son forever.” I crossed my arms over my chest and sighed. “So, I decided that the best thing to do was to come right out and ask the question that was there, in the back of my mind, so that I could go home and try to get back to my life.”
“You'll never be the same after this, Cait, and you know it.” He spoke to me, softly, sitting down on the bed.
“I want to know who I am. I need to find out what the things are that my inner voice is telling me about.” I walked over and sat on the bed facing him.
Julian reached out for me, but I backed away a bit, not really sure what I wanted, but I don't believe he was taking no for an answer this time, because he reached out quickly, catching my face between his hands, which made me gasp, wide-eyed at him, as he came towards me and kissed me forcefully on the mouth.
I wanted to pull away, but, I didn't and I wanted to resist giving in, but I couldn't and the hands that I had placed upon his chest to hold him away, defied my will. I began caressing the masculine skin under my fingers, up and down his chest and over his broad shoulders until they were tangled in his hair.
* * * * *
“Okay, wait a minute.” Ashley said, sternly. I looked up at her from where I sat staring at the wall. “Could you hold the graphic details; this is my boyfriend you're talking about.”
“He wasn't at the time; remember this was before you came back to them.” I smiled.
“Still, would you, please, try to be less descriptive when it comes to your personal affair with him?” She asked.
I smiled. “What you think might happen, doesn't.” But, I had found something that upset her and, to me, that was a good thing.
* * * * *
His lips moved from mine, kissing across my cheek, down to my neck and, slowly, over to my vein, where he latched on to me like a baby to his mother's breast. The feeling, at first was a fiery pull on my vein as if they were going to be sucked out those two small holes, then the pain subsided and a chilling feeling of ecstasy washed over me, I could feel Julian's hands clutching at my robe, hungrily searching for skin, which he found as he placed two warm hands flat against my back, pulling me hard against him and holding me there as he laid me back on the bed.
In the swirling mist that seemed to cover my eyes, a white light slowly seeped through, and with it came a voice, one that I knew and felt I had known for an eternity. It called out my name as the mist became places, different forests, castles, barren wastelands, and exotic islands, stopping, somewhere in time, in a small village, in a remote part of a foreign country.
This is where your ancestor was born. Julian's voice echoed through my mind. He name was Larado, and he was a prophet.
So I was the descendent of someone who thought he knew the future, no big deal.
This is not the beginning of your life, only a mile stone for Larado wasn’t a Christian prophet; he was a vampiric one. This caught my attention and I watched the life of this sickly child flash by me, until his death much later, when he burst into flames. Larado was the first of your line to have mixed blood, pagan and vampire, and it gave him a great wisdom that no one believed. Vampire blood runs in your veins, through eons and countless generations, starting with the first child to be born both mortal and immortal, two thousand years ago, after the creation of vampires.
I watched the scenes changing, as if we were at a movie being quickly rewound, stopping in front of a large castle in the middle of what looked to be a desert. I could feel myself walking through the hundreds, maybe thousands of people that lined the streets, speaking a language that I didn't understand at first, but slowly, began to hear in English.
“It has begun.” An old woman, hunched back and missing an eye, whispered to me as she grasped my arm. “The first of nine has been born.”
“Are you a prophet, old woman?” I asked her.
“Nah, kind stranger, just a reader of the written words of Imar.” She replied.
“Imar?” I questioned.
“The first King.” She replied with a crooked smile.
The first vampire. Julian's voice told me. I was beginning to think that maybe Julian was the prophet. The answers are buried deep in your mind. I can see them before you can. Now, go up to the castle, and don’t worry, you won’t be seen.
The gates and the guards were easy enough to pass, but the closer I came to the room where the first child was, the thicker the air became. I could hear the cries behind the door and slowly, floated through it, as if I were a spirit. I looked over the room, at the blood on the floor, and on the girl that lay on the bed. She was the one crying, asking for her child, who was being held and checked over by a few members of what looked like the priesthood.
They mumbled to themselves, and then one snatched the baby and ran out of the room. I could follow him without any problem and I watched as he led me to a graveyard, where others of his organization were waiting in a circle, with a small sacrificial alter in the middle of them.
Julian, my mind called out, they’re not going to kill him, are they?
Watch. He answered, but how could I watch them kill a poor innocent child? How would I be able to live with it; knowing that there was nothing that I could have done? But, as the events unfolded before me, I watched as the tiny infant defended its self against its attackers. They prayed to their gods, and raised the stake high, placed it down on his tiny chest, and with a heavy rock, swung to drive it through but the rock cracked as it hit the stake, and the stake splintered into thousands of small pieces, and if by magic, the child surrounded it's self with a pure blue light, an impenetrable wall that let nothing pass through. The children know instinctively how to protect themselves, and this was the way it was with the others.
There are more? I asked as the scene change.
Nine in all, nine to rule a nation for two millennia, then a new generation would be born, and so on. This generation has already begun, with you and your son. These were the last words I heard as I slipped back into reality, slowly, opening my eyes to see nothing but darkness, but I could feel the warmth of a body next to me and I reached over and touched Julian's chest, shocking him out of his sleep. I felt him move and a dim light came on as he looked down at me.
“How do you feel?” He asked. I moved to shrug and felt the sharp pain in my neck and I decided to not move as I reached over and touched the two points on my neck.
“Ouch!” I hollered, and took my fingers away.
“The pain will fade quickly, but the bruises may take a little longer.” He whispered laying back down beside me. “So, did you learn anything?”
“Yeah, that it was you in my fantasies all along and here I just thought I had a good imagination.” I smiled, and then looked into his eyes. “Weren't you there? Wasn't that your voice I heard?”
“No, the voice you heard might have sounded like mine, but I believe it was just your subconscious trying to get you to listen. After I let you go, you fell into a deep sleep, so I fell asleep beside you.” Julian whispered, as he stroked my face with his fingers. “What fantasies are you referring too?”
“Never mind.” I smiled and sat up in the bed. “What time is it?”
“Not quite sunrise.” Jul
ian whispered; I could feel the soft caress of his fingers on the back of my arm. “Is there anything else that you remember, have any of your memories returned?”
“No, not since earlier.” I answered and turned to him. “Maybe, in the morning, when the sun is up, I'll remember more.” I pulled my legs up to my chest and sat there a moment before looking back at him. “Can I ask you a question?”
“Anything.” He smiled.
“It's about dreams.” I whispered and watched him nod, telling me to continue. “Do you believe that your dreams can mean things, or can be things that you remember, but you don't know the full story?”
“Yes, I believe that dreams are the window to a person's soul, to their inner being, and they can also be suppressed memories.” He replied, laying flat on his back with one arm behind his head. “Would you like to tell me about this dream that you’re talking about?”
“It may seem strange but then again, why should it. So far, everything I've experienced has been strange.” I laughed, smiling at those green eyes, which twinkled up at me. “Let's see, it usually begins with me standing outside this house, looking up at the moon, a full moon, then it changed and I was standing inside, looking around the halls trying to find someone. I can only assume now, that I was looking for you.”
“Don't assume anything quite yet.” Julian's calm voice told me, he looked very serious about what he had just old me.
“Okay, anyway, it was light enough to see where I was going, but, not bright enough to see much else, well, every now and again, I could see furniture. It's funny, but I could almost feel someone following me.” As I said that, an image popped into my head. “A man.” I whispered. Julian sat up next to me. “I see a man that I hadn't seen before; he wasn't even in my dreams before.”
“What does he looked like?” Julian questioned. I shrugged, trying to see him again in my head, but I wasn't able to make him out fully.
“All I can see is white skin and red eyes, but not like threatening red eyes, not like a hunter's eyes, these were his normal color.” I glanced over at Julian. “Do you know anyone like that?”
