A flash of memory flickered. One of him and me on lush grass. We’d had a picnic near a lake. I’d chosen to wear a flirty summer dress, and done my then-blonde hair into a neat braid. I’d straddled his lap and blushed at the feeling of his heat. Danny—younger, happier—reached up to weave a daisy through my hair. With a push of his arms, he lifted himself to meet my lips with his.
Our first kiss. My first kiss.
The elevator signaled that we’d reached the lobby. My breath hitched as I stepped out of the elevator, released from the confines of my own memories. By instinct, my eyes found the exits right away. Just a few strides and I’d be free of him for the night. But I trampled the idea down, and held onto the little courage I had left. I would see this night through.
“It’s just dinner, Hannah, between friends,” Danny said, catching my hand in his, and giving it a reassuring squeeze. I’d forgotten that, once upon a time, I’d been called by my second name. Only my mother called me by my first name. My father had insisted I was his “nugget”, but Danny and everyone else back in Vermont had called me Hannah.
I nodded, not trusting myself to say anything coherent. We made our way out of the hotel, where a silver BMW convertible awaited. I raised a brow at Danny, while he held the door open for me.
“It’s a rental,” he told me, a smile played on the corners of his lips.
I waited until he sat on the driver’s side before I teased. “And what do you drive at home?”
He threw his head back and laughed as he changed gears. “1967 Camaro RS.”
I laughed with him, imagining the sleek, sexy car as we drove away from the hotel. “You’ve always wanted that car. I remember you finding a picture of it in a magazine and showing me. You said, ‘See this, Hannah, this is my future car. It will attract all the babes.’”
I caught his gaze and the quick bite on his bottom lip out of the corner of my eye.
“You remember?” From the tone of his voice, I knew he could recall the exact moment he had said it to me.
I had to change topics fast. “Do you know where you’re going? I thought we were going to the hotel restaurant.”
“I made a different reservation. I was getting tired of staying in the hotel...and Georgia-Anne called me earlier to say it was just gonna be the two of us.”
Grinding my teeth, I focused on the road. My mother had planned this entire setup. And Danny? What was he up to? I swallowed whatever had dislodged itself in my throat—fear, loathing, anxiety—and reminded myself that Danny wasn’t one to trick people. He didn’t play those games. He laid it all out on the table. What you saw was what you would always get.
“Ahm, Danny? Are you sure you know where we’re going?” I asked again as I read the street names, and noted the condition of the surrounding buildings. We ended up in the Tenderloin neighborhood. Not exactly the poshest area, although I was well aware of some good establishments which had sprouted in recent years. But I was a local. I knew my way around. I didn’t know if he did.
“Yes, it should be around the corner.” He confidently maneuvered the car, and stopped in front of a speakeasy. He hopped out and made his way to my side before giving the valet the key to his rental. I secretly hoped he’d purchased extra insurance for that car.
“How do you know this place?”
“This isn’t my first time in San Francisco, Hannah. I’ve been here twice before.” He patted my hand over his arm. “For work.” I hadn’t thought otherwise.
Danny gave his name to the hostess, who undressed him with her eyes. She welcomed us, although more Danny than me, and asked us to follow her to our reserved table. I had to be careful with my decisions and actions. In normal circumstances, I would have ripped her fake lashes off along with her real ones after the way she ogled Danny. But I couldn’t lead him on, or let him think I’d made my mind up. So I swayed my hips and lifted my chin as I walked beside him.
When Daniel Thompson entered a room, he commanded attention. His regal posturing, and natural intelligence made people notice. And yes, it didn’t hurt that he looked good enough to lick.
I knew how people perceived me. I wasn’t a shrinking violet. I was the belle of the ball with sharp claws, curves in all the right places and legs up to my chin. Together, we epitomized a power couple.
As we made our way to the table, right in the middle of the busy restaurant, I sensed all eyes were on us. But I knew one pair in particular was more focused on me than on Danny. It was almost palpable. I harnessed my inner James Bond, and surreptitiously cased the joint.
At a far corner, in a booth, surrounded with shelves of vintage records and funky mood lighting, I spotted Dr. Jake Benjamin, Levi’s best friend. I sucked in a sharp breath. What was he doing here? Did he really see me? I wanted to look again and see if I could recognize the other men sitting with him. Could I spend the entire dinner with Danny while Jake sat a few steps away, possibly spying and later reporting back to Levi?
Danny must have felt my hesitation, or read the sudden stiffness of my body as disapproval. “Can we have something more private?” Danny asked the hostess. He handed her a few bills, which he did smoothly, and she complied, taking us further back into the restaurant and away from Jake’s prying eyes.
While Danny pulled my chair out, panic began to pour in. Was Levi in the booth with Jake? I was sure I would have noticed. However, if Levi was there, could Alex be there too?
I dug through my memories to recall if Alex ever let Levi know he was in the city. I hadn’t spoken to him, or responded to any of his text messages—I hadn’t even read them—so I didn’t know if he’d mentioned it.
“Hannah?” Danny’s voice snapped me out of my thoughts. “Drink?” He gestured to a girl, a server, who stood beside our table. When did she get here?
“Three fingers Lagavulin, neat,” I told her without hesitation.
“Wonderful,” the girl said, then turned to Danny, “And for you, sir?”
“Just sparkling water for me. Thank you.”
“I’ll be back with your drinks.”
As soon as she walked away, Danny reached for my hands across the table. “Who is he?”
“What—I mean, pardon me?” Was he asking me who Alex was? How did he know I was thinking of him?
“The guy you saw seated in the booth. Who is he?”
I’d forgotten what an astute observer Danny was. But still, he was no mind-reader, and I was thankful for that.
I shook my head and nonchalantly waved a hand. “Friend of a friend. I just didn’t expect to see him here, because he’s got a little one at home and his wife is pregnant again.” It wasn’t a complete lie.
Thankfully, Danny bought it and didn’t pursue the topic. Our drinks came, and our server—Chantal, according to her name tag—took our orders. I hadn’t even seen the menu. Danny asked if I was fine with the tasting menu and my mind was too busy to process anything, so I nodded curtly.
I nursed my drink. Truth be told, I would’ve liked to ask for the entire bottle and downed it in one go. Danny was in front of me, but my thoughts had wandered to Alex. What would he do, what would he say if he found out I was on a sorta-date with my ex-fiancé?
“Hannah, are you fine with this?” Danny squeezed my hand again.
He was such a sweet man. He’d always been considerate, caring, thoughtful, and incredibly romantic. I couldn’t forget how he’d asked me to prom. He’d gotten the entire football team, cheer team and the school band to do a performance after a home game, which, thanks to Danny—the star quarterback—our school had won. All that jazz to get me to say yes.
“I’m fine, Danny.” I searched deep within the crevices of my mind for the sweetness I once had, and offered him a saccharine smile. “I’m sorry you have to put up with me and my mood tonight. I didn’t think Mom would fake some kind of disease to get out of dinner.”
Under the soft, ambient lights, Danny frowned. “Your Mom?”
“Yeah. It’s her usual act. You know her a
nd her antics.” I picked my drink up with my free hand to take a quick sip, hoping it would calm my nerves.
Danny’s grip on my hand tightened. “Hannah, that wasn’t the reason. Your Dad...she said your Dad isn’t feeling well. And she’s right; he had to stay in. This whole trip has been hard on him.”
“What do you mean?” Whatever his answer would be, my heart instinctively knew I wouldn’t like it as it crashed in a quick tempo against my ribs.
“Your Dad has cancer, Hannah. It’s terminal.”
My vision blurred as he said the words.
“No. Why would you say that?” I yelled, not caring who heard me.
He held onto me tighter, as I loosened my grip on reality. “It’s the truth. Didn’t they tell you?”
No, it couldn’t be. Not Daddy. He was tough and healthy and...I’d been away from him all these years. What did I know?
I scrambled to get up, the restaurant spinning around me. Danny’s voice became inaudible, a mumble. The noise in the restaurant turned into one piercing ringing in my ears. All I could hear was the screaming in my head. Not my father. He wasn’t dying. I had to go back to him so he could tell me Danny was a fool. Danny was wrong.
“Hannah, stop, wait.” Danny’s arms circled my waist, forcing my body against his.
He led me back to our table, as I muttered, “Not Daddy. He’s good. He said he’s going to live forever.” My voice trembled. I didn’t sound like me. I sounded like the little girl who had once lost a pet cat.
“I’m sorry. I shouldn’t have said anything. I thought he’d given you a clue when he saw you this morning.” Danny handed me his water and I welcomed the cool crispness down my parched throat. I was choking on sorrow and disbelief. “I’m sorry, Hannah.”
“I have to go. I want to see him. I want to know why he didn’t tell me.” I looked to Danny for answers, which I knew he didn’t have. “Why didn’t he tell me, Danny?”
What else could he do? He waved to our server and dealt with the payment. “I’ll take you back to the hotel.”
I found myself back in front of the restaurant, while we waited for the car. The chill on my skin and the heaviness in my chest shook me. Danny, who had been keeping me close to him, took his jacket off and hung it over my shoulders. “Thank you,” I said under my breath, keeping my eyes on the ground, formulating the questions I’d ask my parents as soon as we returned.
Danny helped me into the passenger seat, even buckling my seatbelt for me. I smelled his minty toothpaste when he got close. I couldn’t even feel bad that he hadn’t been able to eat dinner.
Driving back was quieter than the ride there. People, buildings and streets blurred as my eyes welled with tears. But I forced myself not to let go of them. Not in front of Danny.
The silence in elevator ride up was deafening. My jaw clicked and popped, as I worked the muscles around it. Daddy bought the horse I’d fallen from when I’d gotten the jaw injury. I’d cried, pouted, and wailed the entire autumn for that horse. I’d wanted him for Christmas the year before, but hadn’t received him until my twelfth birthday. Daddy had bought him for me. Only now did I wonder what had happened to Willy. He had been a good horse, picked just for me. Daddy thought he had a good temperament. But Willy had never grown to like me. It had been clear the first day I’d ridden him—he’d bucked and thrown me off his back.
Daddy had given me the world, and my mother had given him a lot of flak for it.
And he could be dying.
I rushed out of the elevator and back to my parents’ room. Before I could reach the door, Danny pulled me back with one hand.
“Hannah, wait. Relax for a bit. There’s no sense in going in there with guns blazing. He’s tired. He’s sick. Your mother has been helping him out, and I’m sure she’s tired, too.”
He was right, of course, but the stubborn Buford in me wouldn’t back down. I slipped my wrist out of Danny’s grasp, and turned on my heel to face him. “You had no right to tell me, Danny. No right!”
“Hannah, I understand how—”
I wasn’t done. With the heel of my hand on his chest, I gave him a hard shove. “No. You wouldn’t understand. You can’t possibly understand how I feel right now.”
“As a matter of fact I do, Hannah.” He held onto my hand again, bringing it back on his chest, letting me feel the hammering of his heart. “Have you forgotten what my life was like before you left?”
I searched his eyes, and found hurt and grief. How could I have not remembered? “Your mom?” Danny nodded. “When?”
“Five years ago. The effects of the last clinical trials she went through eventually wore off. Her condition worsened a few months after you disappeared. She fell down the stairs one night, went into a coma and never woke up.” His eyes lowered, and he swept his hair off his forehead.
For as long as I’d known Danny, his mother had been sick. She was a lovely woman, even with her different moods, and there had been times when I wished I had her as a mother instead. Yes, as a teenager, I’d even told my own mother that, just to be spiteful. Abigail Thompson would have been my mother-in-law. Knowing how progressive Huntington’s could be, Danny and I had gotten engaged during her better year, while she’d undergone a promising clinical trial, and despite the protestations from my father, we’d proceeded with the wedding plans. Abigail had left this world before she could witness her son getting married. I loved her. I had betrayed her too.
With my temper toned down, I admitted again in a hushed tone, “I just can’t believe he didn’t tell me.” I leaned my back against the gold and cream wallpaper.
Danny joined me, and his shoulders sagged as he stuffed his hands in his pockets. “Maybe he would have but couldn’t. Sometimes, it’s hard to find the courage to say what you need to say.” Somehow, I knew he meant those words more for me than my father.
With a heavy sigh, I straightened. Later, Danny and I would have to talk about our past. Later.
“I’d better do this now before...it gets too late.” What I really wanted to say was before I lost courage, but I didn’t want to admit it.
My mother was a lot slower opening the door this time. For a brief moment, shock appeared on her face, then she molded it into excitement.
“Back already? Was the food horrible?” I wasn’t buying it. Her voice had a tinny sound. She was nervous, anxious.
I bypassed the pleasantries and walked right into the bedroom, “Daddy? Dad?” The bed was empty. I didn’t know if I should be thankful or worried not to see him lying on it, weakened by his condition.
Through the opened balcony doors, he called out to me, “Nugget?”
A soft wind blew past me as I stepped onto the balcony. The view was breathtaking. The darkness and light fog were punctuated with lights from the tower and the cathedral. Daddy sat on a lounger, facing the city beyond. Before he could get up, I stopped him with raised hand, and signaled to him to make room for me. I snuggled with him, placing my head and a hand over his chest. My heart prepared to burst.
He sighed before kissing my hair. “Daniel told you?”
I nodded. “I wish you had told me this morning.” I angrily swiped away tears.
“And ruin our reunion?” Daddy let out a dry chuckle. He wrapped an arm around me, rubbing one of my shoulders with his large hand.
Wiping away more tears, I looked up to him. “Are you in a lot of pain?”
“Not right now. I’m on heavy medication. Once we return to Vermont, I have another round of chemo to go through.” I expected his voice to shake, or hear a tinge of fear in his voice. But my father was a brave man. He had faced many trials in his life. I had no doubt in his mind, he could beat this thing, or at least fight like a hard Texan until the end. “I had to postpone it so we can come and see you.”
If there ever was a perfect time to blame myself and the decisions I’d made a decade ago, it was now. He could have been going through his treatments, possibly prolonging his life. Instead, he was here in the city with
me, far away from home.
We stayed silent for a while. It was comfortable, unrestrained. It reminded me of the many times he had taken me fishing with him. Just the two of us, waiting for a catch, enjoying each other’s company. When the wind picked up and the night air cooled, I led him to the bed and asked him to rest.
“I’ll see you in the morning,” I promised before leaving the bedroom and joining my mother and Danny out in the living room of the hotel suite.
I couldn’t look at my mother when I asked about my father’s illness. “What stage?”
“Four. The oncologist has hopes with the newest treatment.” The words were like a sword that speared through my heart.
I faltered and reached for the nearest chair. Danny helped me onto it, asking if I needed a drink. I could only nod. “When was he diagnosed?”
“About three and a half years ago. We were told then that prostate cancer had a high rate of survival since we’d caught it early. But it came back this year, with a vengeance. It’s spreading.” My mother’s voice was clear, but it lacked emotion. It was like listening to a recording. It wasn’t unlike her. In a huge crowd, she could be overly dramatic, but in a more intimate gathering, she was like a stone. I didn’t know which was worse.
The glass of water Danny offered me sweated on the coffee table. I could spend the night staring at it. But I’d been alone for far too long. I’d gotten used to trouble-shooting my own dilemmas, although not a lot of them came my way. It was one of the perks of keeping people at bay. Whenever Nica ran into some sort of trouble, she’d come to me, and I would do anything possible to help her out. There was no doubt in my mind she would offer help and encouragement right now. But what I craved at this moment was time alone with my thoughts.
I stood, shaky on my own feet. “I’m going home. I’ll come for breakfast in the morning. We’ll talk more then.”
My mother glanced at me and offered a flat smile. “That’s fine. We have breakfast at seven sharp.” Then she looked back down on her skirt, smoothing it out with her hand.
Chasing the Runaway Bride (Bliss Series Book 3) Page 9