“What?” I asked.
He shrugged his shoulders casually, but I could see the tense set to his eyes. “You asked what I did before I started working at the lake.”
My heart pounded in my chest. To anyone else, it would’ve been just a casual conversation between two friends, but to me, it was huge. It was the first time that Zach had offered me any kind of personal information about his past. And he’d done it voluntarily. I hadn’t pushed him or coerced him into telling me anything, he’d chosen to because he was beginning to trust me. I wasn’t sure whether to laugh or cry at the situation, but I kept my face neutral like it was no big deal.
“Which one was your favorite?” I asked him. He let out a long breath and I could see him starting to relax again.
“I’m not sure I really cared for any of them which is part of the reason I switched jobs so much,” he answered. “But I guess working on the road crew wasn’t so bad. It kept me busy and the pay was good.”
“If you could have your dream job, what would it be?” I turned in my seat and leaned my back against the door, so I could watch him.
Zach looked at me and then back at the road. “I always wanted to go to school to be an EMT,” he said.
“Really? What made you want to do that?” I asked curiously.
He swallowed hard. “My mom OD’d when I was a kid. I watched them working on her, trying everything they could to save her. I thought they were amazing, and ever since then, I wanted to do that.”
“Did they? Save her, I mean,” I posed the question as gently as possible, but I could still see the pain in his eyes as he shook his head no.
“She was gone, but they still tried. Maybe because I was standing there, I don’t know,” he shrugged.
The ache in my chest was something new. I’d never felt so much pain for someone else, but seeing Zach hurting actually caused my heart to hurt. Without thinking, I reached over and took his hand. He stiffened at first and I kept my hand loose, giving him the option if he wanted to pull away, but after a few seconds, I felt him tighten his grip, just a fraction. We stayed that way, with his hand in mine, the rest of the drive. I stared out my window, trying to figure out what was happening to me.
I was no stranger to developing bonds with other people, after all, I’d been very close with my mom and I’d even had the occasional boyfriend before. The men I’d served with in the Air Force and the guys I worked with at Hamilton Security were like brothers to me. I trusted each of them with my life and they trusted me with theirs. Yet, sitting in that truck, holding Zach’s hand, was the most connected I’d ever felt to another human being.
What had started out as a simple attraction was quickly becoming more, at least for me. How much more, I couldn’t say. Logically, I knew that getting involved with Zach was reckless, but I was also helpless to stop it. I still didn’t know why Micah wanted him brought to Chicago, if he was in fact Zane. For all I knew, he could be wanted by the police, possibly as a hacker or a drug dealer, although my instincts told me that he wasn’t a criminal.
Regardless of all the unknowns, two things were perfectly clear; the man sitting beside me affected me more than anyone I’d ever met in my life and reckless or not, I wanted to get to know him better.
My hands gripped the sides of the ladder tightly as I stared up at Zach. Edith had given us a list of last-minute things that needed to be done before the big weekend and we’d been working all morning to get them finished. We’d already pulled the extra-large grill out of storage and set it up near the bait shop, then we’d arranged tiki torches around the various camping areas. After completing a few other tasks, we moved on to our final project, decorating the lake for Memorial Day.
We talked easily as we moved around the property, hanging the red, white, and blue decorations from the light poles. Zach seemed different, more comfortable than I’d ever seen him. Most people probably wouldn’t have noticed the slight change in his smile or the relaxed set of his jaw, but I’d spent so much time with him, studying him while he worked or ate or breathed that I knew him, probably better than I knew myself.
It was ridiculous the amount of time I spent thinking about the guy. When I was with him, I couldn’t get enough of watching the way he moved or listening to him speak. Late at night, when we were each in our own cabins, I’d drift off to sleep, picturing his face in my mind. Most of the time, I felt like an infatuated teenager, but I couldn’t help it. Zach made me feel things I’d never felt with anyone else, like something had been missing before that wasn’t missing when he was around.
The memory of his hand in mine had played on my mind all night until I felt sure I’d go insane. I’d never felt that kind of connection before and I desperately wanted to try it again, just to see if it would be the same the second time around. I fought the urge to reach for him though; mostly because I didn’t want to make him feel awkward, but also because a little part of me was worried that he would reject me if I tried again.
As a pararescueman, I’d been through extensive training, which taught me to act quickly and trust my instincts. Lives had literally depended on my ability to think clearly and move forward without second-guessing my decisions. I’d jumped out of countless helicopters, often landing in enemy territory to find and rescue one of our own, and I’d done it all without a second thought.
Being near Zach was entirely different though. From the moment I’d laid eyes on him, I’d done nothing but question myself and worry over how to behave around him. I wasn’t used to feeling so insecure, and it was frustrating.
I let out a sigh as I stared up at Zach’s perfectly curved, denim-clad ass and tightened my hold on the ladder to keep it from swaying with his movements. The thin material of his white T-shirt stretched tight across his shoulders as he climbed up, accentuating the muscles of his back and leaving my throat feeling dry.
Once he reached the top, he stretched his arms around the pole, tying the two ends of the decoration together. The maneuver caused his T-shirt to rise above the waistband of his jeans and I had to swallow back a groan as I caught a glimpse of smooth, golden skin. His jeans hung low and the sight of the two sexy divots on either side of his spine made my mouth water.
I turned away as soon as Zach’s feet touched the ground, hoping he wouldn’t notice my growing erection. It didn’t help though that all I wanted to do was throw him down in the grass and lick the sweat from his body.
“God, it’s hot out today,” Zach said.
“Mhmm,” I responded noncommittally.
“You okay? You’ve been really quiet today,” he said. I could feel his eyes on me and I busied myself with lowering the ladder back down.
“Yeah, I’m fine. I guess I just have a lot on my mind,” I told him.
“Is there anything I can help with?” he asked cautiously.
I picked the ladder up and held it at my side before I looked at him. I could see the concern in his eyes and when he smiled gently at me, something warm spread throughout my belly. I suddenly wanted to tell him that he was what I had on my mind. He was the reason that I couldn’t eat or sleep or even think clearly. Before I got a chance to say anything though, we were interrupted by the sound of an engine and we both turned to see Edith driving towards us in her truck. Dust and gravel kicked up behind her as she pulled up next to us.
“Hey, boys! The place looks great,” she exclaimed, wearing a big grin.
“Thanks. We were just finishing up. Thought we’d grab some lunch and then see what else you needed us to do,” Zach told her.
“Well, I tried to call you, but then I remembered you don’t keep your phones on you when you’re working. My sister just called, and my niece fell and broke her leg. I need to get over to the hospital and see if I can help out. I’ll probably end up spending the night,” she explained.
“I’m sorry to hear that. What can we do to help?” I asked.
“Everything’s pretty much all set, but I’d already given Freddie the night off since he’ll
be working the bait shop all weekend,” Edith said. “Would you boys mind working the night shift for me?”
Zach and I shared a glance and then shrugged our shoulders. “No, of course not,” we said at the same time. Edith laughed.
“Great! Thank you so much. Brenda’s got it covered now, so you should get some rest since it’ll be a late night. I’ll be back in the morning and will take care of everything so you two can have the weekend off like I promised,” she insisted.
“Don’t worry about a thing,” Zach said. “We’ve got it covered and if you need more time with your family, you know we don’t mind helping out.”
Edith smiled at us and her eyes softened. “I know that, and I appreciate it more than you boys will ever know, but you both work very hard and you deserve some time off.” With a final wave, she drove away. We watched until her truck had pulled out onto the main road and then we turned back to each other.
“Well, it looks like I’ll be learning a new part of the business tonight,” I joked.
“Yeah, I guess so,” Zach laughed.
He lowered the tailgate on his truck and waited while I slid the ladder in before closing it up again. When we were finished, we climbed inside and drove back to the bait shop. I followed Zach out to the shed and looked around as he put the ladder away. There weren’t many people there that day, and I wondered if they were all at home, getting ready for the long weekend.
Edith had been right. We’d worked hard the last few weeks, making sure that everything was in order and I had to admit, the results were splendid. The grass was trimmed neatly around the shore of the lake and the picnic tables that dotted the edges looked pristine with their new red paint. The sky was perfectly blue with big, billowy white clouds and I couldn’t help but think the place looked like it belonged on a postcard.
The sun’s rays were hot, and I could feel the sweat trickling down my back and soaking through my shirt. I stared down at the dock at the bottom of the small hill, the water lapping against it looked cool and inviting. I heard Zach move up behind me and I had to hide my grin, so he wouldn’t know I was up to anything.
“It looks like a board is loose, down on the dock,” I told him.
“Really? Where? We just fixed that thing,” he said.
“Come on, I’ll show you,” I said, already walking away so he’d be forced to follow. Zach trailed along beside me and when we reached the dock, he began searching the platform for any loose planks.
“Are you sure? I don’t see any boards that look loose,” he said, his face scrunching up adorably as he continued to look. I almost felt bad for what I was about to do, but then I thought about how good it would feel instead.
“Oh, my bad. It’s not on the dock, it’s in the water,” I told him.
“What?” he asked. He turned around to face me and I barely had enough time to register the confused look he was giving me before I was rushing forward and grabbing him around the waist, hurtling us both off the side of the dock and into the water. We broke the surface at the same time and I laughed at the shocked expression on Zach’s face.
“What the hell was that?” he sputtered, making me laugh even harder.
“It’s really hot out and I thought you’d want to cool off. If you think about it, you should be thanking me,” I explained, trying to sound innocent, but failing miserably.
“Oh! You’re exactly right. I really should thank you,” he said.
My lips quirked up at the mischievous glint in his eyes and relief rushed through me that he wasn’t angry. Zach dove under the surface of the water and I took off in the opposite direction, trying to get away. A few seconds later, I felt his hand clasp around my ankle and I let out a startled shout as he yanked me under.
He was laughing hard by the time I reached the surface again and I stared at him as I caught my breath, completely enthralled by the sound of his laughter and the sparkle in his blue eyes. His wet hair was pulled back away from his face, exposing the jagged scar that ran along the side of his right eye, pulling the tender skin down at the corner.
I swallowed hard as a mixture of emotions swirled through me all at once. Sadness for the pain he’d experienced, anger towards whoever had dared to touch him and awe at the strength and determination I know it must’ve taken to survive such a vicious attack. Of course, I was going with the assumption that he was in fact Zane. For all I knew, he could’ve received that scar from a car accident, but either way, I thought he was amazing and beautiful.
A sliver of guilt pierced through me. I was there to do a job. Micah was counting on me to do that job, but instead, I was playing around with Zach and getting to know him. I’d convinced Micah and my friends that I needed to get close to him in order to find out if he was Zane, but somewhere along the way, my reasons for getting close to him had changed.
I wasn’t exactly sure what my feelings towards Zach were yet. I knew I liked him…a lot. I liked being around him and talking with him and of course, I was extremely attracted to him. He hadn’t told me much about himself and I had a million questions I wanted to ask him. Most of which had very little to do with uncovering his identity. I wanted to know what his favorite foods were and if there were any that he hated. I wanted to know what movies he liked and if he loved to read like I did. I wanted to know what made him laugh and when the last time he cried was. I wanted to know everything.
“Oh, God! I’m so fucked,” I mumbled under my breath.
I did really like Zach and could tell that my feelings for him were beginning to go beyond that of a friend. I knew I shouldn’t allow that to continue; that I should fight it with everything I had because I had a job to do and orders to follow. But for the first time in my life, it seemed like there might be something more important than following orders and that terrified me.
There was a certain sense of security in doing what you’re told. It takes away any of the guesswork and leaves no room for doubts, because it’s someone else’s decision you’re upholding. I’d done it for years in the military and I’d done it for Micah since I began working for him. I’d always looked to my leaders for answers and I trusted their decisions. I still trusted Micah, wholeheartedly, but there was a part of me that was starting to feel like Zach was worth breaking all the rules for.
We spent the next half hour splashing and chasing each other around the lake until we were exhausted. Finally, we swam to the dock and pulled ourselves out, collapsing onto our backs, and lying side by side. I closed one eye against the gleaming sun and turned to face him. His eyes were closed, and a serene smile was on his lips. What I wouldn’t give to be able to lean over him and trace his lips with my tongue.
We lay that way for a while, soaking up the sun’s rays and letting it dry our clothes. The sounds of the water lapping against the sides of the dock lulled me into a peaceful state and I could feel myself drifting off. I wasn’t sure how much time had passed before I felt a hand shaking my shoulder.
“Jeremy, you need to get out of the sun. You’re starting to burn.” I looked up, blinking against the bright sun and saw Zach kneeling beside me, a look of concern on his face.
“How long have I been out?” I asked with a yawn. I sat up, shaking my head in order to clear the sleepiness from my mind.
“Only about thirty minutes, but your skin is starting to turn pink. Let’s go home and get some sleep before we have to work tonight,” he suggested.
He stood up and then reached down, offering me a hand. I stared at his hand as I slipped mine into it. I immediately felt a tingle that traveled up my arm and my eyes shot to his, wondering if he’d felt it too. His hair hung over his face in a haphazard mess, but I could see his eyes peeking out from behind that curtain and the look I saw there said it all.
His eyes were wide and full of wonder and dare I say it? Excitement. He pulled me to a standing position and swallowed hard as I stared down at him. We were standing very close, our chests nearly brushing against each other and I could see the long dark lashes th
at framed his eyes and brushed against his cheeks whenever he blinked. My eyes lowered to his lips and they parted on a quick gasp. Zach dropped my hand as if he’d been burned and spun away from me.
“I’m going to get some shut eye. I’ll meet you back at the bait shop around nine,” he called out over his shoulder, not stopping to wait for my response.
I stood there as he climbed the hill and disappeared around the side of the shop. A few moments later, I heard the sound of his truck as he started it up. By the time I made it to the top of the hill, he had driven halfway around the lake. There was only one reason why he’d taken off like a bat out of hell. Zach had felt the same thing I was feeling, and he was scared. I smiled the entire way back to my cabin.
It was difficult to sleep after that, but somehow, I managed. My dreams were filled with images of Zach’s golden skin, firm muscles and tantalizing mouth. I woke up with a raging hard-on and had to jerk off in the shower, so I’d be able to make it through hours of working with him without suffering a terrible case of blue balls.
The last of the sun was just beginning to fade and the sky was streaked in beautiful purples and pinks as the stars began to peek out. The temperature had cooled off to a pleasant seventy-five degrees and I decided to walk instead of drive around the lake to the bait shop.
As I walked, my mind wandered to my friends back home. I felt guilty that I hadn’t given them or my assignment much thought over the past few days. Micah had been extremely patient, but I knew eventually he was going to want some real answers. He deserved real answers. After all, he had hired me to do a job. He was the reason I was there in the first place and I had a loyalty to him. But at some point, the line between my loyalties had begun to blur and I wasn’t sure who I was really there for anymore; Micah or Zach.
I didn’t see Zach’s truck as I walked up to the door, but he was behind the counter when I walked in. He looked at me nervously and I smiled at him. “I guess you decided to walk too?” I asked.
Found_Hamilton's Heroes series_Book 1 Page 7
