by JoAnna Grace
“Yeah, yeah, okay.”
Martin took his life into his own hands as he bent down and sealed his lips over hers. He kissed her with full tongue. His hands roamed her back and pulled her body into his. Ami carefully pushed him back so it didn’t look like an attack. Martin’s smug grin only enraged Ezekiel, who slammed the door behind him.
“You want to tell me what the fuck that was about?” Ezekiel growled each word, his control hanging by a thin wire. “Take you dancing again? As in, he’s done it before? Recently?”
Her leopard came alert to the challenge in his voice, the way his eyes shifted to wolf. No matter if this was her chosen mate or not, neither leopard nor woman would submit to a controlling bastard.
“It’s none of your concern.” Ami turned away but didn’t make it two steps before Ezekiel took her arm and swung her around.
“Of course it’s my concern. You are my concern.”
“Watch it,” Amilynn hissed. “Don’t make the mistake of believing you can dominate me. You will lose.”
“I’m an alpha, baby. I don’t lose.”
She laughed in his face. “You’re a prick.”
Ezekiel stepped close, forcing her to tilt her head up to keep eye contact. “That’s not what your leopard was saying a few minutes ago.”
Ami’s senses were assaulted with his mating scent. The warm honey and spices filled her mind, causing her body to react of its own accord. Her breasts tightened as her core hummed with need. She closed her eyes, trying to rein in the overwhelming sensation. “Don’t push me,” she whispered.
“Why do you fight it?” His breath on her neck made her shiver. He cupped her cheek and ran his thumb over her bottom lip. “Our animals know we’re supposed to be together. You heard my thoughts earlier. What does that tell you?”
Amilynn sucked in a shaky breath when he kissed her cheek. Still, she kept her eyes closed. If she looked into his eyes, it was over. As much as she wanted to tell him no, she couldn’t. Her cat urged her on, pushing for more contact, deeper bonds with their mate.
“Z, you don’t want me as a mate. This is for your own good. I don’t want to hurt you.”
“Ami,” he said on a sigh. His arms bracketed her body and pulled her in closer. He nuzzled his nose at her neck. “Don’t you know it killed me to be away from you? If you don’t want to hurt me, then quit fighting me.”
“It’s all I know.” Ami’s voice quivered and Ezekiel pulled back to look into her eyes.
Damn.
There was so much in his gaze; burning embers of passion lay beneath the surface. His touch conveyed a gentleness she didn’t think he possessed. She definitely didn’t know how to react to it.
Oh, crap. She blinked rapidly, stupid tears springing to her eyes.
Slowly, he smiled and those adorable dimples formed on his cheeks. “Then it’s a good thing I’m one tough sonofabitch, huh?” He touched his forehead to hers.
For the first time, Amilynn felt a flutter of hope. Maybe they could make this work. Maybe Ezekiel was just the man she needed to keep her feet on the ground.
“I’m not looking for love, Ezekiel.”
“No,” said another person in the entryway. “She’s just looking for the next poor fool to screw.”
Amilynn gasped. She’d been so wrapped up in Ezekiel that she didn’t hear the front door open. Martin stood inside, his face a granite mask of anger.
“What the hell did you say?” Ezekiel turned, positioning Ami behind him.
“Don’t fall for her bullshit, Ezekiel. Only a couple days ago, she was with me.”
“Martin, that’s not—”
“Save it,” Martin said. He shook his head and sneered at her. “I’m done with this shit. And you . . .” He pointed a finger at Ezekiel. “I know what happened with you and Julia. Don’t think you can go around using innocent women and get away with it. You two are heartless.”
“You’re about to cross a line.” Ezekiel stepped forward, his body tense and ready to fight.
“Z, give us a minute.” Ami nudged him away, but Ezekiel didn’t move. “Now.” She put enough power in her voice that he whipped his head around.
“Are you serious, after what he just said?”
“I don’t care to hear more.” Martin turned to leave. “I’m done.”
Ami chased him out of the alpha house and into the rain. “Martin, please.” She might not have been in love with him, but she damned sure didn’t want to hurt him like this. He deserved so much better.
Martin looked at her over his shoulder. The anger and pain on his face tore her up.
“I’m sorry. You have to understand. I never meant to hurt you.”
“No, this is my fault. All the signs were there. Hell, they were written in blood on the wall, and I still didn’t heed the warning.”
Ami blanched. “How could you say that to me?”
“Because it’s true,” he growled. “I thought we had something. From the first time I saw you, I thought you felt it too.” He huffed and ran a hand through his hair. “Should’ve known. What’s the saying? A leopard can’t change its spots.”
Her heart dropped to her knees. His words sucked the air from her lungs. A wave of guilt and self-hatred washed through her, taking all warmth with it. Martin walked away when she didn’t deny his accusations. Ami stood in the rain, unable to make her feet move.
In the back of her mind, she’d always known her lifestyle would catch up with her. For so long, she’d boxed up the emotions that might have made her change. She was a fucking mess. All those nights in the arms of random men, all those wasted kisses and meaningless smiles, and what did they get her?
Who could possibly love her? Who could love a woman who hated and religiously abused herself? Amilynn had used her body as a tool and, in the process, broken a part of her soul. She was a fool to think she could be anything more.
“Amilynn?” Ezekiel’s voice came from behind her, soft and hesitant.
She couldn’t face him. She couldn’t let him see the ugliness inside of her, the disease that ate at her soul and crushed her spirit. Filth covered her inside and out. He deserved better. Martin deserved better. They all did, Sampson and Bianca, Tom and Nate, her Pride members.
“Ami, did he hurt you?” He was closer. But he didn’t touch her, didn’t force her for face him.
“No.” She turned to him. “I hurt him. And if you don’t leave me alone, I’ll hurt you too.”
“Ami, I don’t care what happened with him before I came home. We can start fresh, you and me.” He reached for her, water dripping off his hand. They were both soaked to the skin, the rain coming down in sheets.
“I’m nothing but a murderer and a whore, Ezekiel. It’s all I’ll ever be.”
“No,” he said, taking her by the shoulders. “You’re more, so much more.”
She brushed off his touch and shook her head. “I can’t do this.” There was no way she was going to curse him to a life with her as a mate.
“Don’t turn away from me.” He reached for her again.
“Leave me alone.” Ami slashed out at his chest, leaving four lines through his shirt. Blood welled up. Ezekiel touched his chest and held out his bloody hand like he couldn’t believe she’d cut him.
Unable to handle any more, she shifted and darted across the meadow, into the woods. The leopard, who mourned as if she’d suffered a great loss, ran into the trees.
EZEKIEL WENT TO the only person he knew could get through to Amilynn. And he was nervous as hell to knock on that door.
Tyrone answered, pulling on a baseball cap. His eyes narrowed as he scanned Ezekiel’s wet and bleeding body. His nostrils flared and that was the only warning he gave before shoving Ezekiel against a wall, hand around his neck.
“What did you do to her?”
“Nothing.” Ezekiel held his stare, but lifted his hands in surrender.
“Where is she?” Tyrone asked, his voice deep and full of rocks.
“We ha
d a—” He hesitated to say “fight.” Tyrone might kill him. “A disagreement. She’s upset.”
“Ty? Sweetheart?” Melissa entered the hallway, pulling her robe around her shoulders. “What in the world is going on?”
Tyrone dropped his arms, but he kept his eyes level with Ezekiel’s. “All you seem to do is piss her off.”
“You’re telling me.” Ezekiel picked at his shredded shirt.
“Ezekiel, why don’t you explain exactly what happened?” Melissa slid her hand into Tyrone’s and gave Ezekiel a comforting smile.
“Can you just go check on her, please? She took off into the woods. It’s raining hard out there.”
“Go, Ty. I’ll visit with Ezekiel. She needs you.” Melissa pushed at his arm.
He hesitated. Tyrone didn’t want to leave his mate alone with another male, but his concern for his sister won out. He shifted into a sleek black leopard and ran to find Amilynn.
“I’m sorry to barge in like this,” Ezekiel said to Melissa.
Her return smile was so sweet he could practically smell sugar. “Amilynn can be a handful, as you can see. Why don’t you change and I’ll fix us something warm to drink?”
“Thanks, Mel.”
He joined her in the second, downstairs kitchen a few minutes later and she handed him a cup of coffee. Melissa patiently listened while Ezekiel told her about the events leading up to their argument.
“Can I ask you a question?” she asked after a moment of silence to take it all in. Ezekiel nodded. “Don’t be offended, okay?” He nodded again. Melissa took a deep breath and looked him in the eyes, a weighty gesture given her submissive feline nature. “Is Amilynn nothing more than a conquest to you? Because,” she held up a delicate hand when his mouth dropped open, “too many men have tried to tame her or fix her or master her. It never works. No one has ever tried to love her for the amazing and partially insane person she is.” Melissa’s smile held such love for her sister-in-law that he knew the insane comment was a tease. She sipped her coffee and allowed him to think on it a moment.
Ezekiel’s shoulders slumped. “My wolf claimed her right away. I guess I’ve tried to charge in and make things happen.”
“Which is why she runs. It’s her protection mechanism against emotional situations.” Melissa shook her head and looked off. “It’s nuts, really. Put a gun to her head and she turns into a warrior goddess and kicks tail. Try to show her affection and she runs like a spooked horse.”
“I do care about her, Mel. I want her to be happy.”
“Even if it’s not with you?”
Well now, didn’t that knock the air from his sails? What was his priority? His wolf getting a mate or Amilynn’s happiness? Could he give her up if that was the best option for her?
“I can make her happy.” He fidgeted with the mug, wondering if that was a lie.
Melissa touched his cheek. “Sweetheart, I know you would give her the world trying to. But it’s not your responsibility to provide happiness for her. Amilynn’s happiness is up to her. She has to choose it, to rise above her circumstances and her past, and live a fulfilled life. I hope you’re a part of that, don’t misunderstand. I think you could bring her so much joy. But she has to make that choice and deal with the consequences either way.”
“What do I do?”
“If you love her—truly, selflessly love her—you’ll do what’s best for her. Only you can figure out what that is, though.”
He lay in bed that night, thinking about what made Amilynn happy. What did she love, what made her smile? What did he have to do to help her be comfortable and stable in this new life?
Dancing. Amilynn loved to dance. It was a part of her, as natural as breathing. She was so damned good at it too.
The Mirrors. His brothers made her laugh and smile faster than anyone. If she was around them for five minutes, she had cheap entertainment.
Fighting. Ami loved to hone her skills. She loved guns, knives, and combat. It made her feel powerful and strong.
Ezekiel plotted and planned. He was going to show Ami she could be happy with him. No more dominating her, no more forcing her. If he had to wait the rest of his life, fine. But Amilynn was going to come to him of her own choice.
Ami scented her brother, even in the rain. His black leopard had a wildness that was undeniable. Maybe it should have won Ezekiel points that he went straight to Tyrone. Maybe it should be annoying that he knew her well enough not to chase her.
Or maybe the whole claw-your-chest-open gesture finally pushed him away and Tyrone was there to plan Ezekiel’s murder. Who knew?
Either way, Tyrone was trailing her and she didn’t want to face him. She climbed up one of the trees, not that he was foolish enough to fall for it. For a long time, Tyrone casually meandered down below as Amilynn jumped from branch to branch.
We going to do this all night? ‘Cause I’ve got a hot date, he said telepathically. Only her brother and Vivian could read her mind.
Then get back to it. I didn’t ask you here.
Ami, for fuck’s sake. Come down here and talk to me.
The tawny leopard leapt from her tall branch and landed with a graceful, quiet thump on the ground. Did he send you to rein me in?
He’s worried.
He’s a control freak.
Ezekiel is alpha, Ami. That’s what they do.
Not to me.
To everyone. The black leopard sat on his haunches and stared at her with eerie stillness. It freaked out most people, but she’d grown up with it.
I refuse to submit to another man. You, of all people, should understand that.
No argument there.
So how can I possibly ever be mated? To mate is to submit.
No, to mate is to trust.
Well, I’m damned sure not good at that. Ami’s leopard found a leaf dripping rainwater and watched the droplets slither and roll onto the forest floor. It was better than looking at her brother. He knew her every emotion once he looked into her eyes.
Trusting Ezekiel, or yourself?
Both.
So you’re just going to turn rogue and live in the woods forever? Sounds like a plan, sis.
Don’t be a brat, she said.
Wake up, Ami; yesterday is gone and the day before that is a distant memory. Figure out who you are now, today. And strive to be that.
Damn, have you been reading psychology books again? Her attempt to derail him with sarcasm didn’t work.
Tyrone stood on all four paws and met her eyes. Quit running. Get your shit together and quit running. You’re missing today ‘cause you’re stuck in the past. I love you, you know that. But someday, you’ve got to grow the hell up and stop labeling yourself with all the wrong adjectives. You’re strong and giving. You’re independent and you’ve got talent out the ass. And you have a man who would come to me because he’s worried about you. That’s a hell of a lot more than most can claim. Tyrone turned tail and headed for home.
Her brother hadn’t said so much in months. When Tyrone did open his mouth for more than a second, wisdom usually came out. Damned if he didn’t smack her down with encouragement right then.
She loped to catch up with him, rubbing her head to his neck as they walked back.
Martin called me a whore.
Excuse me? The black leopard snarled, his long canines flashing.
Not directly, but he implied that Helena and Jake had hit the nail on the head when they wrote it on our walls in kitten blood. He said he should’ve considered it a warning, and that I could never change. I guess when a guy like Martin, who I thought was so kind and sweet, said it, I felt like it must really be true. Like I don’t have the capacity to be better.
First off, fuck Martin. I’ll deal with him. Second, nothing is written in stone until it’s on a headstone. You feel me?
Thanks, Ty.
Love you.
Love ya too. Ami nudged her head against his and rubbed along his neck, their leopards soaking up the contact. They
raced back to the alpha house.
Right before they reached the front door, Ami bumped her brother hard. Do me a favor? Don’t kill Martin. He sort of caught Ezekiel and me hugging before I could break up with him. He’s angry and has every right to be.
Being angry is one thing. Being an asshole is another. Energy sparked around Tyrone, signaling that he was shifting back to human. Only when the flash dissipated, Ty was gone. Ami cringed. Poor Martin. Her brother was a scary sonofabitch when he wanted to be.
Ami went to her room and crawled into bed. When she finally slept, her dreams were of a blue-eyed man with silky black hair, lips that promised pleasures she couldn’t even imagine, and a body that begged to be touched.
In the early morning hours, she came awake with a start. She was sweating and panting. Amilynn slammed her fist into her pillow, knowing damn well that she had been dreaming about Ezekiel. Her body was a live wire and it sent her through the roof.
It was his fault. Damn wolf. Damn Ezekiel. She got out of bed and clothed herself for a workout. Three forty-five in the morning, she found herself quietly padding down to the workout room. Ear buds blasted rock music as she stepped on the treadmill and ran balls to the walls. An hour later, she switched tactics and kicked the stuffing out of the punching bag that hung from the rafters. Tapping into the agility and gracefulness of the cat helped her perform turns and kicks, jumps and punches with speed humans could only dream of.
“You’re up early,” came a voice from above. Amilynn looked up at the balcony to find Sampson leaning on the railing, watching her fight her sand-filled opponent.
“Yep.”
He hopped the rails and landed heavily on the lightly padded floor below. “Don’t tell my boys I did that. They aren’t allowed.”
“Too late, chief. I kinda did that on our first day here. But I did warn them not to do as I do.” Amilynn laughed, wiping sweat from her brow.
Sampson nodded. “So you never have told me who trained you. ‘Cause you didn’t learn that from some PT at the all-night gym.” He put on a pair of boxing gloves similar to the ones she wore. This was a familiar routine. She and Sampson had become sparring partners, exchanging tactics and moves. He’d been a very good mentor, challenging her and teaching her, encouraging her when she needed it.
