Now he was wondering if this meant the final end to their relationship.
What an idiot! He shouldn’t have gone along with Melissa’s plan for even a second. He slammed the bar’s door shut behind him and locked it. He wasn’t letting Sam go. She had to give him an opportunity to explain. His heart raced as he thought about the last time she ran from him. He shoved down the panic building in his chest.
He drove along the shore, hoping to see her working off the emotion with a late run. She wasn’t. Finally he drove home because he couldn’t think of where else to go. Calls to Joanna’s and Sam’s cells went unanswered. He was relieved to find Joanna’s car parked in her usual spot. He jogged into the house, calling Sam’s name, but it was his sister that came down the hall toward him.
“What is wrong with you? How could you let that happen?”
“Joanna, I didn’t do anything. I never touched her. Melissa’s been using me like I’ve been using her. She didn’t know how things were between me and Sam.”
“Whose fault is that? You should have told her.”
“She asked me to stick by her side. I didn’t know Sam was going to show up just as she decided to thank me with a kiss.”
Joanna turned away from him. If he couldn’t persuade her, how was he going to fix things with Sam?
“I love Sam. I wanted her by my side tonight. You know that. How could you think I would do anything to hurt her?”
Joanna spun around. “Because you did hurt her.” She looked away but when she turned back to him, there was determination in her eyes. “She’s leaving, Lee. She was going back to the cottage to pack. You have to fix this.”
“Dammit. She’s doing it again. She’s not even giving me an opportunity to defend myself.” He paced the entryway and ran his hands through his hair. Anger replacing the well of guilt inside him. “Fine. If this is her reaction to every problem, every challenge, she should go. I’m not spending the rest of my life worried about what I’ll do to send her away again.”
Joanna opened her mouth and shook her head. “So you’re going to let her go?”
“If that’s what she wants to do? Yes.” He nodded.
“What about the bar?”
“We’ll sell it. I’m done. Ray was a good friend, but there’s only so much I can take. Maybe someone else can make something out of it.” He headed for the stairs but Joanna’s question stopped him.
“Is Melissa really pregnant?”
“I don’t know. She didn’t want to be seen alone at the party, asked me to look adoringly at her. I swear, Joanna, I wouldn’t have agreed to it at all, if I thought there had been any chance Sam was going to show up.”
“She’s hurting, Lee. I don’t think you should let her go like this. If she is thinking of leaving, it’s only because she feels betrayed. She doesn’t know how else to handle it.” Her advice was softly given. He patted her back and then continued up to his room to get his running gear.
A forty-five-minute jog did nothing but aggravate his knee. He limped his way back home and into the shower. By midnight, he had worked his way through all of the quarterly status reports from his managers, a prospectus on another business he was looking into purchasing and two viewings of late night sports news. It was becoming clear that the usual four hours of sleep weren’t going to come easily so he grabbed the Jeep keys off the front table and headed out.
If a long drive didn’t get Sam’s face when she saw him with Melissa out of his mind, maybe it would eliminate the shine of the new platinum band from his memory.
****
A quick stop at the cottage was all she needed to pack up her things and grab her back up set of keys for the bar. Maybe the cottage was still legally hers but she couldn’t spend the night in her bed there wishing things were different. The bar would give her something bigger to focus on. The dead bolt clicked into place and she rushed to disarm the new security system. She turned the lights on and spun around, eyeing all of the changes. It hardly looked like the same place.
Pride surged through her as she took in the small touches, the little things she’d done to make her mark on the business. The photographs of local haunts, the mermaid and shell sconces, even the dishware that had all been chosen by her. Lee was everywhere too. From the crown molding to the flooring, he’d had opinions on it all.
They’d done this together. Again she felt the pain of watching him with Melissa, deep in her heart. The realization that she didn’t fit there beside him, that he hadn’t taken the opportunity to tell his mother about her. Her vision of the bar blurred as her eyes filled. She blinked the tears away.
The smell of paint was almost overwhelming, the dining room stuffy and hot. She wouldn’t turn the air conditioning on until morning so she’d have to bear it for the night. She didn’t want to be responsible for even one night of raising their electric bill. She walked into the office and clicked on a little oscillating fan to move the air around. Just enough to get her through the rest of the night.
The couch was comfortable, but reminded her of Lee in so many ways, she had to shut those memories off. She was prepared to lay with her eyes open until exhaustion took over. It didn’t take long and Sam fell asleep to the whirr of the motorized fan.
She awoke an hour later. The sound of the office door swinging open had her shooting up.
Lee’s hand still on the knob, he let out a sigh when he noticed her. “You’re here.”
Unprepared for the sight of him and still shaking off the fogginess of sleep, she stared. He wore red lacrosse shorts and a gray T-shirt. His hang around clothes complete with beach sandals. She slid her feet around to the ground and smoothed a hand down her hair. “I was sleeping.”
“I can see that. Why? Didn’t think I’d find you here?”
She finally felt awake enough to answer him. “No, I can’t be at the cottage any longer. I was there until an hour or so ago. I’m not hiding.”
“You haven’t been answering any of my calls.”
“My phone is in my bag underneath the seat in the Jeep.” She stood up and walked behind the desk. There had to be something she could do, something to take her attention from how perfect he looked, how badly she wanted to run into his arms and let him fix everything.
Lee took her place on the couch, throwing himself down and pushing his hair back. “We’ve been crossing paths all night. You shouldn’t have run out like that.”
“You’re acting like I did something wrong. Last I knew, you wanted me at your sister’s party. I canceled because I didn’t think I could get ready in time. I didn’t realize you’d be escorting your pregnant fiancée.”
“What the hell are you talking about?”
“Your mother told me exactly where I would find you. One of us has the wrong information. Which one is it? Your mother or me? Maybe both of us.”
“You really think I would do that? I told you before. Melissa and I helped each other out by coming to events like this one together. She didn’t know our mutual agreement was over. I had no idea you were still planning on coming.”
She stared at him before laughing. She should have known it all led to the same thing. She wasn’t meant for that world. “I’m sorry. You’re right. I had no business going there. I didn’t belong. I guess I just needed to see it for myself.”
“Sam, I didn’t mean it like that. You caught twenty seconds of an exchange between us. I know how bad it looked, but that was just one part of it. How could you think I’d cheat on you?”
She threw her hands down on the desk and leaned over it. “I know you wouldn’t cheat on me. I know that that…woman set me up.”
Lee stepped away from the couch and came around the desk to her. “Then why run away from me?” He gripped her elbows and pulled her into him.
Her hands came up to rest against his chest to push him away but the beating of his heart stopped her. His vitality, his strength called to her. “Because those twenty seconds were the same ones your mother caught after she told me
about your fiancée. How long were you there before I arrived? How many chances did you have to tell your mother that you had someone you wanted her to meet? That you and Melissa were just friends?”
“I wanted to. It wasn’t the right time.” His hand cupped her cheek. “It doesn’t change anything about us, Sam. I love you.”
She wanted so badly to lean into him, to forget that she ever cared about being accepted into every facet of his life. She couldn’t do it. There was no more room in her for secrets. It shouldn’t be this hard to be wholly loved.
“I’ll do it tomorrow.” He pulled her tighter to him. “I’ll take you to her. Hell, I’ll put an announcement in the paper if that’s what will make you happy.”
“It’s not about what will make me happy. It’s about you. You don’t want to bring me into that side of your life. If you did, you would have done it a long time ago.” It took all of her strength, but she pushed back and stepped away from him. “You have no idea how much you’ve hurt me.”
He shook his head and stepped toward her. Another touch and she’d give in to him. “I’m tired. Can we continue this conversation tomorrow?”
He looked her over, his eyes lingering on hers. “Come home with me. There’s no reason for you to stay in this steamy office. I’ll sleep in the guest room.”
Being in his home meant being surrounded by him. It wouldn’t do. “I need time to think. I can’t do that with you right now.”
He dropped his hands. “Promise me you won’t take off again.”
“I promise and I wouldn’t leave you hanging with the bar.” She rubbed a hand over her chest, a useless attempt to slow it down and ease some of the pain.
He jerked the office door open. “Right, the bar. Of course you would never leave the bar.”
She sighed. “Damn it, Lee. You know that’s not what I meant.”
He walked through the door without another word to her. The only sound, the whirring of the fan and the shimmer of papers on the desk as the air rolled by until the air conditioning roared to life.
Chapter Seventeen
Lee didn’t leave the bar. He kept busy by running through every part of the business. Sam might hold true to her promise of not leaving but he wasn’t taking any chances. At five, he left for a change of clothes. He would have gone for a morning run if his knee wasn’t protesting any kind of movement.
He stumbled his way through getting ready and returned to the bar to find Sam still sleeping on the office sofa. She didn’t wake when he entered the office or when he placed the bag he found in the Jeep on the desk. He stayed still, watching her for those few minutes, hoping they could find peace eventually.
She sighed and rolled over. Sam needed sleep. He’d seen how exhausted she was and so he found himself slipping out of the room quietly instead of shaking her awake and insisting she give him the ring she’d dropped at the party.
He got his body out of the office and forced his mind to follow. Today was a big day. Tomorrow was the grand re-opening and he had so much to do to make sure Sam’s dreams for this place happened.
He started with the new ordering system. Some of the older waitresses were worried it would be too complicated for them to pick up. He wanted to know it inside and out so that he could help them through it. Within an hour, he had checked on Sam twice. Stupid, since he knew she could sleep for ten hours without waking but he couldn’t stop himself. Two hours later, he had read the instruction manual twice and alternated between anger and guilt at the events of the night before.
He had to come up with a plan before Sam took off on him again. He replayed every conversation, every kiss, every touch. She seemed to be less upset about Melissa than with his reluctance to come clean to his mother. She didn’t get it, didn’t understand that it was his relationship with his mother at the heart of the matter. It had nothing to do with her.
The phone hadn’t stopped ringing all morning. From vendors to employees, it seemed like everyone had an urgent request of some sort. He handled them all while Sam slept.
Sleep tousled and bleary eyed, she finally came out of the office and went directly to the coffee pot. The sound of her sandals clicked over the hardwood floor as she poured a mug and took a seat at the bar. It only took a few moments of his patience for her to spin around to face him.
“Did you know that my dad adopted Michelle?”
He hesitated. “I didn’t know the specifics but I had an idea.”
“Why didn’t you tell me?”
He wouldn’t prevaricate but he didn’t have an answer she was going to like. “I just found out and Michelle asked me to wait. She wanted to tell you herself. Despite the fact that she’s a scheming, jealous woman, she’s still your sister and it was her secret to share.”
Sam studied her coffee, giving him time to notice that as much sleep as she got, she was still tired.
“I think you’re right. She was jealous of me. I didn’t see it. It must have been hard taking care of me and knowing that my father gave me that extra attention she needed, too.”
“None of that had anything to do with you, Sam.” He leaned on the bar, bringing his body just that little space closer to hers. He wanted to comfort her, but he tried to give her the space she asked for.
“It didn’t. I wish she had told me though. What she did to us? I think she did it because she wanted to get back at me. She told herself it was because it was the best for me. It wasn’t.”
“Nothing could excuse the lies. Nothing.”
“My father loved her. He was so proud when she became a business owner, that she was successful in her own way. He never told her. He never really knew how to talk to her.” Tears shimmered in her eyes but she didn’t let them fall. “It’s all a mess, isn’t it?”
“It doesn’t have to be. I’m here for you. We’re not a mess. This bar is not a mess. We’re making something of it.”
“I’m not leaving. I’m not running away, but I don’t know if staying together is the best thing for both of us. I love you. I do. But I don’t think it’s supposed to hurt this much.”
Her stormy green eyes connected with his. Despite her words, she wasn’t uncertain. There was no thread of indecision in her voice. She was done.
“Sam,” he took a hold of her hand and rubbed his thumb over her soft palm. “We are good for each other. We’re more than this bar.” She had to see that.
“I don’t know. I can’t do this right now.” She slipped her hand out from his.
He took a deep breath to keep from grabbing on to her, to slow his heart down and come up with something more to change her mind. He swore he would never let her go so easily again but she wasn’t leaving Oldport this time, she was leaving him and he had no idea how to stop her.
****
She did it. She walked away, giving Lee and the bar her back when she left for a quick shower at the cottage. She called her sister on the walk, asking if she could crash on her couch until she found a new place to live. Michelle kept any questions to herself.
The interested buyer was going to check on the property today, so Sam dragged her luggage behind her back to the bar. There was no reason to leave her things there any longer. Lee was gone when she got there, but he left her a stiffly worded note with every detail of what had to be accomplished. Alan was prepared to handle the morning’s craziness, and so together they got the bar into shape. There wasn’t much left to do but the finishing touches.
Maria arrived around noontime and kept Sam busy for the rest of the afternoon trying out each menu item and watching her plate the dishes. Their new business partner was prepared for the grand opening but wanted to practice and train her new wait staff. Maria was three inches shorter than Sam, but what she lacked in height, she made up for in energy. She was warm and engulfed Sam in an immense hug before diving into the work of making incredible plates heaping with fried clams, scallops, and fish. How she could have a son like Jake, Sam couldn’t fathom.
Through it all, Sam stayed numb
, unable to think about Lee or their marriage. In her luggage, she’d packed away the platinum band she had bought him last week along with her own wedding band. She would get through today and the next and the one after that. Eventually, everything would fall into place and she would no longer feel like a stranger in her own life.
She was doing the right thing.
Her certainty wavered when she walked out of the kitchen to find Lee behind the bar giving Joanna and the other bartenders some last minute tips. She watched him gracefully flip over glasses, pour, and then garnish with no wasted movement. He was the perfect bartender, a friendly smile, a willing ear, and a tad extra for the customers looking for a little flirtation with their drinks. He was the ideal person to retrain their staff.
Her heart hurt just looking at him. How was she going to get through this? Was it just a few days ago that she was thinking how wonderful things could really be if the restaurant took off?
A tap on her shoulder had her spinning around. Jake returned his hands to his pockets. “I was wondering if you had a moment to talk.”
She followed him out to the benches they’d optimistically placed outside the entrance for the diners waiting for tables. He gestured for her to sit but she shook her head. If Lee had Jake here to initiate their divorce, she’d rather be standing.
“I heard a rumor and I wanted to see if there was any truth to it.” He looked at her, a small smile on his face. “Is it true that you’re thinking about selling your father’s cottage?”
“How did you know?” She shook her head. “I forget how small of a town Oldport really is. My sister already had an offer but we haven’t signed any papers yet.”
“Good. Don’t.” His smile widened. “I have a special client that would snap it up in a second. I’m confident she’ll make an offer that will make both you and your sister very happy. She’ll top anything you’ve already received.”
“You’ll have to talk to my sister. Michelle is the one leading the charge on this. I don’t really know anything about the details. Do you have her number?”
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