Noelle laughed. "What's that supposed to mean?"
But her grandmother just shrugged and gave her a smile that could only be described as mysterious. Noelle shook her head and gave her a quick hug before resuming her unpacking.
"What I'm looking forward to is having all three of my girls under one roof for the first time in ages," Beth said.
"Me too. Nicole said she can only stay a couple days for Thanksgiving, but she'll be back closer to Christmas. I'm hoping I can convince Natalie to stay here with me for all of December."
Beth smiled. "I have a feeling she just might. There's something about this year that feels different. All of you coming home. There's change in the air."
Turning from her closet to face her grandmother again, Noelle laughed and shook her head. "What's with all the mysterious, all-knowing wise woman stuff today? I think you've been watching one too many Christmas specials." She kissed Beth on the forehead to let her know she was just teasing. "Let's go get some hot cocoa and sit on the porch. What do you say?"
"I think that sounds lovely, dear."
A few minutes later they were settled on the porch swing together, huddled up under heavy blankets and sipping steaming hot cocoa. This had been one of her favorite things to do with her grandmother growing up, and having the chance to do it now made her feel more in touch with Silver Acres than she had in a long time.
A peaceful feeling settled over her—something she rarely felt these days in her fast-paced life—and she rested her head on Grandma Beth's shoulder, just enjoying the moment as she looked out over the endless acres of the ranch. How had she never appreciated this when she was younger?
All she’d ever wanted was to get out of there. It had felt so isolated out on the ranch, so far from where exciting things were going on. Even though they were right outside of Willow Valley, it was still a small town. As a teenager and a young woman, she'd found it all so dull.
So she'd finished up her education and hightailed it to Denver, where she'd built a solid reputation as a savvy businesswoman. She was one of the most sought after consultants in the metro area for new businesses. Her life was a constant rush of meetings, dinners and social engagements. Young Noelle would have been awestruck by the sophisticated woman she was now.
But all she could think about as she sat on the porch with her grandmother enjoying a quiet afternoon in the country, was that there was nowhere else she'd rather be at that moment. Forget fancy parties and nightlife. Undisturbed nature and wide open blue skies were where it was at.
Could it be that she'd spent her entire adult life running away from the one thing that made her truly happy? A picture of Finn formed in her mind, the way he'd looked as they'd ridden around the ranch together earlier.
Could the happiness and fulfillment she'd been seeking have been here all along?
With great effort, Noelle pushed that idea firmly out of her head. She was being ridiculous. She was just feeling nostalgic as she sat on the swing with her grandmother. Her life was in Denver.
Besides, Finn had made it clear long ago that a future together would never happen. The last thing she needed to do was get her hopes up that anything had changed.
The threat of snow was looming just over the horizon. Finn knew he had to get the final boards replaced in the fence before the weather got bad, so he'd been working tirelessly all week to get the last of it finished. Normally it would fall to the ranch hands, but there weren't enough to go around at the moment so Finn was picking up the slack.
"Why are you out here doing this by yourself?"
He nearly dropped the last plank on his foot he was so startled by the sound of Noelle's voice directly behind him. He spun around to find her hiding a smile behind her hand.
"I'm sorry." Her voice was full of amusement.
"No, I don't think you are," he said with a grin. "Sneaking up behind me is totally your style." How many times as kids had she tried to be a prankster and find ways to embarrass him? Until he'd gotten taller and stronger than her. Then she'd started looking at him like he was more than just her best friend, a look he wouldn't mind seeing again.
Ugh, why did he keep going there? Ever since she'd shown up three days ago he hadn't been able to get her off his mind. Needing a distraction from the direction his thoughts were going, he turned the conversation to her.
"What are you doing out here by yourself is the real question. Checking up on me to make sure I'm doing a good job?" he teased.
"Well, someone has to do it. Who put you in charge, anyway? No one with any sense, I'm sure." Her eyes glittered with mirth.
"Your grandmother, darlin'."
"Well, there you go." She waved her hand in the air. "What does she know about running a ranch?"
"More than you, I'd wager." His smile grew wider. He'd always loved riling her up. Time to see if it was still just that easy.
She didn't disappoint.
"I'll have you know that I am what some people might call an expert when it comes to business acumen. I'm highly sought out and highly paid for my knowledge." She jutted her chin up in the air and Finn fought to control a laugh. It was too easy.
"Okay, Miss Expert, tell me how you'd handle this situation." He leaned back on the fence he'd just finished and crossed his arms over his chest, regarding her through narrowed eyes. "You've just taken over a business because the last guy in charge not only didn't do his job, but was so bad at it that the business hadn't seen such hard times since its inception. All the employees were friends this guy hired who thought they didn't have to work hard either. What do you do?"
She pursed her lips and mirrored his stance. "Simple. Fire them."
"All of them? Without anyone left to work?" he challenged, arching a brow. "Then it would be next to impossible to do business."
Her blue eyes flashed. "Absolutely. They weren't working anyway. There are always people vying for a job. If it was a good business to begin with, there would be plenty of people eager to replace them."
"Even if it cost time and money to get them trained and up to speed?"
She didn't waver. "No question. In the end, it would be worth it. There may be a small setback, but eventually there would be a whole team of well-trained and loyal employees that you could trust completely."
He nodded once, pushing off the fence and walking past her to pick up his tools and throw them in the back of his truck. "That's what I thought too."
"Wait, what?" She dropped her arms and followed him, and when he turned to look at her, she was staring him down, her eyes wide, a hint of alarm making its way across her face.
He watched silently as she processed their conversation in a new light. He'd decided this morning that he had to tell her about the state of the ranch before someone else did. He hadn't wanted to when he'd first seen her, but she had to know. The ranch was—if only technically—hers, whether she wanted it or not. He didn't look forward to the conversation they were about to have.
"Finn. What are you saying? Is something going on with the ranch?"
Sighing, he nodded. "It's a long story. Let's go in before the sun sets and we freeze out here." She wasn't wearing a heavy enough coat to stand out here for as long as it would take to tell the whole tale.
"No." Hands on her hips, Noelle wasn't budging. "Tell me now." Her voice was tight.
Finn closed the distance between them and placed his hands on her shoulders, trying his best to ignore the desire that flared in him as he caught the scent of her hair in the wind. She could be so damn stubborn.
"Listen to me, Noelle. I will tell you everything. I promise. But let's at least go somewhere warm. It's going to start snowing any minute."
She looked up at the overcast sky, then frowned at him. "Fine," she said, poking a finger at his chest. "But don't think for a minute that you're getting out of this."
He held his hands up in surrender. "And cross you? I wouldn't dare." He gave her a disarming grin but she only grimaced at him in return.
"Come on," he said, placing his hand on the small of her back and guiding her to his truck. She glanced at him as he opened the door for her, and the apprehensive look in her eyes made him wish he had anything but bad news to give her.
He only hoped once she had the full story that she wouldn't turn her back on him forever.
Chapter 3
As Noelle listened to the story unfold, her heart sank. How had the ranch fallen into such a state? It didn't make sense. Her father had been a very cautious and business-savvy man. He wouldn't have hired just anyone to oversee the business that he'd grown from nothing into one of the biggest ranches in the area.
"How is this even possible?" Noelle crossed her arms on Finn's desk in the office and dropped her head onto them.
According to Finn the ranch was practically bankrupt. The foreman had mismanaged things so badly—and apparently the guy in charge of finances, too—that it was a miracle they were still afloat.
She sensed Finn move up behind her before she felt the gentle pressure of his hand on her shoulder, squeezing softly in an effort to comfort her. But even the zing she got from his touch wasn't enough to comfort her now.
She jerked her head up and whirled around to face him, frustration and helplessness taking over. "There is no way Daddy would have chosen people so poorly suited for the job. I just don't understand how this happened."
Finn averted his gaze and shifted his feet, a dead giveaway that he wasn't telling her something.
"What aren't you telling me?" She stood up from the desk and closed the distance between them, hands on her hips as she narrowed her eyes and studied him.
He shook his head. "Noelle..."
"Don't you dare try to lie to me. I know you too well for that. There's more to this story, and I want to hear it. Now."
With a heavy sigh, Finn met her eyes and nodded, a look of remorse on his face. As he paced back and forth in the small office, raking his hand through his dark hair, the muscle in his jaw twitching, Noelle felt her stomach clench.
He was a pretty easygoing guy. She had only ever seen him this upset once before, and he'd been perfectly validated for it. Whatever he was about to tell her couldn't be good.
But how much worse could it get?
She watched him closely, noting the way he stopped and closed his eyes briefly before meeting her gaze full on.
"It's my fault."
She felt a knot form in her stomach and work its way up her throat until she couldn't even speak. Finn's fault? That made even less sense. Finn was one of the most hardworking, dedicated men she knew. There was no way he could be involved in the decline of the ranch.
And hadn't she just seen him outside, pushing himself to get things taken care of before the snow came in? By himself, no less. And what about this new barn? He'd done that. No, he had to be mistaken. It wasn't his fault.
She swallowed the lump in her throat and took a step toward him, reaching out a hand. "You can't blame yourself, Fi—"
"You don't know, Noelle." He slashed a hand through the air emphatically, his eyes burning into hers, and she took an involuntary step back. "You asked, and now I'm going to tell you. But you aren't going to like it."
She slumped back into the office chair, unable to imagine what he could possibly say next.
Finn looked at her now, his gaze steady, mouth grim. "Before your father told anyone he was sick, he called me up one day out of the blue and asked me to come to his office. I had no idea what he wanted to meet about. I hadn't talked to him in months, and then I only saw him occasionally when we did business together."
That confused Noelle. What business would her father and Finn have had together? She didn't have time to ask, though, because he plowed ahead, apparently determined to get it all out now that he'd started.
"I went to your house to meet him the next day, and he told me he was looking for someone to take over running the ranch. When I asked him why, he hedged a bit, but he must have known that I knew he would never just hand over the operation without there being a really good reason."
He stopped and watched her, his eyes sad.
Understanding dawned, and Noelle lifted her hands to her mouth as a small gasp escaped. "You knew?" It was barely a whisper, but Finn nodded, and Noelle felt her heart squeeze painfully.
Finn had known her father was dying and had never told her. It was a betrayal that went deeper than the tender scars of heartbreak caused by her own father's silence about his disease.
"How could you, Finn?" Tears spilled over her lids and down her cheeks, but she didn't care. "You should have told me. You owed me that at the very least."
Confusion washed over his features for a moment, but then he was there in front of her, kneeling down and staring earnestly into her face.
"I know that saying I'm sorry doesn't even begin to cover it. But please try to understand, Noelle. He made me swear not to tell anyone. He didn't want his last months with his family to be full of sadness. He wanted you girls to all have happy memories of your time together."
Finn reached for her hand, but she flinched at his touch as if she'd been burned. "Don't touch me," she yelled. "You lost that right a long time ago. And to think I thought maybe things had changed with you. With us."
She barked out a laugh full of bitterness and spun away from him, slightly embarrassed that she'd said it out loud, but too hurt to care. "When will I learn that all I can count on you to do is hurt me?"
Her words hit him harder than a slap to the face. The last thing he wanted to do was hurt Noelle. How could he make her understand that he'd wanted to tell her? So badly. But Mr. Silverman had made him swear. Made him believe that it would be better for Noelle to not spend his last months grieving his impending death.
And that's what had sealed the deal. He'd been convinced it was the easier way for Noelle. And right or wrong, he'd gone with it. Because despite time and distance, he'd never gotten over her, and he'd been willing to do anything he could to spare her more pain.
Yet here she was in pain again. Because of him. Something she apparently thought was a repeat offense on his part. But that wasn't something he could think about just then because he still hadn't told her everything. And he was sure if she was angry now, she'd be absolutely livid in another few minutes.
"Noelle..."
She must have come to the same conclusion because she turned back to him, visibly trying to get her temper back under control, and said, "Just say it and get it over with. Obviously there is more because this still doesn't explain how this disaster with the ranch is your fault."
Hurt was radiating off her in waves and Finn wanted nothing more than to wrap her in his arms and make all the pain go away. But it looked like his chances of finding a way to see if there was anything left between them were slipping through his fingers by the second. And she had to know. Might as well get it all over with now.
"So, that day…" He paused when she squeezed her eyes shut, but she nodded for him to go on. "There was a reason he needed to tell me. He was making plans. Arrangements."
"His will," she whispered, and Finn noticed she was clasping her fingers together to keep them from shaking.
"Yeah. He knew he didn't have a lot longer, and he wanted to make sure that the ranch would be in good hands."
Noelle finally met his eyes again, but they were clouded with confusion. "What are you saying?"
Finn clenched his jaw, remembering the way Mr. Silverman had insisted he was the only one he trusted to run the ranch. That he wouldn't leave it anyone else's hands. How Finn had refused, still unable at that point to reconcile that his future wouldn't include Noelle, and unrelenting on his stance that he couldn't be a part of something that was supposed to have been theirs.
His pleas that Finn reconsider echoed in his head every day now as he worked to rebuild what Mr. Silverman's alternate choice had squandered away. What if he hadn't refused? What if he'd been able to get over himself enough to see that Noelle's legacy was properly cared f
or, whether she was by his side or not?
It was that knowledge that haunted him as he faced her now.
"He chose me, Noelle. He wanted me to be the one who took over the ranch. He never meant for it to fall into the wrong hands, but I left him no choice. I said no."
Finn watched her face closely as she processed his words. Emotion after emotion was written plainly on her features. First there was understanding, followed by disbelief, and finally immense sorrow. She saw—as clearly as he did—that if only he had honored her father's wishes then the ranch would never be in the state it was now.
Sure, he'd worked tirelessly to fix it, even putting money from his own business into it when there weren't funds available in the ranch's accounts. He was doing a pretty good job of getting Silver Acres back on its feet. But they were a long way from where they needed to be, and it would be a long time before things were back to how they'd been before Mr. Silverman's death.
Venturing closer to Noelle again, Finn took her hand, and this time she didn't pull away. She stared at him silently, and he wished he knew what was going through her head.
"I'm so sorry, Noelle. For everything." He hoped she could see that he meant everything. Then and now.
A long moment passed, then she shook her head, tears glistening in her eyes. "I can't do this. Just take me home."
Her choice of words couldn't have made her point any clearer. I can’t do this. They were the same ones she'd used the night they'd broken up. Any hopes he'd had that maybe things could be different this time around went up in smoke.
Because there was still one more thing she didn't know. And he had a bad feeling it was going to send her right back to Denver and further from his reach than ever before.
The truck ride back to the ranch house was long and silent, but it gave Noelle time to think. By the time they reached the house she knew exactly what she had to do. Take charge and get this ranch back on track. Because at its heart, it was just a business. And helping businesses succeed was what she did best.
Kiss Me Under the Mistletoe: A Small Town Holiday Novella Collection Page 2
