by Leslie Pike
I won’t let this be the end. Ours is a love story.
I pull into the Starbucks parking lot and take the last available space. Getting out of the car, I start toward the door.
“Bro,” Brick calls.
Turning, I find my brother locking his car then walking in my direction. “Hey.”
He throws an arm around my neck and pulls me into him. It’s just like he used to do when we were kids and I was a foot shorter than him. I half expect him to give me a noogie.
“Glad you could meet me. I need your advice.”
A smile lifts the corners of his mouth, along with a surprised expression. “I’m here for you, brother.”
We take the seat by the window and fill the table with our coffees, Brick’s muffin and my lemon cake.
“That’s your breakfast?” he says.
“Yeah. It’s my fruit for the day.”
He chuckles and pulls his chair closer to the table. “What’s the latest with the Bay girls?”
I entwine my fingers behind my head and rest it in my palms. “We’ve only talked on the phone, and Mallory was in the room, so she couldn’t really tell me anything more.”
“You gonna see her today?” he says taking a bite of muffin.
“Yeah, we’re meeting for lunch. She had to work this morning. That’s why she didn’t meet me when we flew in.”
“What do you want my advice about?”
“About women. My two.”
“I take it you’re talking about Charlotte and Mallory.”
“Yeah.”
“What can I tell you? You’ve got more experience with women than all the Swift men put together.”
“But y’all know more about love than I do. That’s new to me.”
He dips his chin and knits his eyebrows together. “Love?”
“Yep. I love her.”
“What does she think about that?”
“Haven’t told her yet.”
“Why are you burying the lead? Aren’t you sure?”
“As sure I’ve ever been about anything.”
He stays silent at first, just looking in my eyes. “Then you have to convince her to stay. I know what it feels like to lose the love your life. I don’t want that for you.”
My heart breaks a little for Brick. It’s been years now, but he still hasn’t fully recovered.
“So, how do I do that? Mallory’s welfare comes first, the way it should. But if I could fix things…”
“You’ve got to try. It’s the only way out of this. You gotta fix the problem. For good.”
“Easier said than done. Think I should talk with Mr. Midas about his kid?”
He gives me a pointed look. “No, I don’t. He’s the one who raised the little shit. That won’t do any good.”
“What would you do?”
“Remember how you handled your bully in eighth grade? She needs to give the kid a taste of his own medicine. That’s how I’d start. You know what sixteen-year-old boys are sensitive about. Tell her to use it.”
Suddenly a plan starts taking shape.
“Then hit it on the other fronts. The school, and most importantly Mallory. Talk with her. Back her up. Let her know she and her mother mean something to you. Be her champion. You’re in a relationship with her now too.” He smiles. “Circle the wagons.”
The familiar Swift saying we’ve heard our parents say a hundred times applies. We’ve always worked as a whole when one of us in trouble.
I knew I loved my brother, but never more than today. He didn’t question my love. He just believed me. He’s been my champion all my life. Now I need to be that for Charlotte and Mallory.
“Missed you, woman,” I say walking into her apartment.
She leans her head on my shoulder. “Me too. You have no idea how much.”
We hold on to each other, neither wanting to break away.
I brush the hair back from her ear. “How’s Mallory?”
Pulling back she looks me in the eye. “Not good. It took an hour of pushing for Paige to talk her into a movie. That’s where they are now.”
Tossing my keys to the counter, I take a seat on the couch and motion her over.
“I want to help.”
“Honestly, Atticus, I’m not sure anybody can. I’m her mother and I’m really scared. It’s so much worse this time. The wound is so deep I’m afraid for her.”
I can see the tears beginning to well in her beautiful green eyes.
“Is she still talking about moving?”
“Yeah. She reminds me every time we talk that I promised her that. And school starts soon. We’d have to start planning now. If I don’t honor my promise, it’ll erode whatever trust she has.”
I rest my forearms on my knees and shake my head. “That can’t be the answer. Running away isn’t ever the way to go. She needs to stay and fight her fears.”
Charlotte rises and begins pacing. “Easy for you to say. Just think about how devastating it must be to hear and see people every day making fun of how you look. Making fun of something you can’t do anything about. Now picture it happening when you’re a child. No matter how mature you are you just don’t have the skills or the confidence that comes with age. It’s a wound that’s hard to recover from. And then it happens again and again.”
Tears are streaming down her face as I get up and take her in my arms.
“Then her family’s gonna have to stand up with her. That means you and I and Mallory together.”
I take her face in my hands. “I love you, Charlotte. Do you know that?”
First the smile, then the quivering chin and the waterfall of tears.
“Wait! Doesn’t that make you happy?”
“I’m afraid of losing you. Because I’m a mother, Atticus, and my child will always come…”
Her voice trails off, but her eyes finish the thought.
“I refuse to let you and Mallory go. I don’t care what it takes. Together we’re gonna fix this.”
“But how?”
“We can start with you telling me you love me too. I didn’t hear you say those three words.”
Her arms wrap around me and she squeezes. “Of course I love you! I love you!” A kiss punctuates the moment. Then she gives me kiss after kiss. My hands, my head, my arms, my stomach. Now we’re laughing. My legs, my ass, the spaces nobody would think of but her.
“You forgot something,” I say with a straight face.
“I haven’t forgot. I’m saving that one for tonight.”
I get a brilliant idea. “How long’s your break?”
She understands where I’m going with the question. “We have another forty minutes.”
“Let’s go,” I say leading her toward the bedroom. “We need some sexual healing.”
We lose our clothes and get in bed.
“Call in sick. Come on,” I say rolling her over on top of me.
“I can’t. I’ve got two more appointments.”
“So what? I bet you’ve never taken a sick day. We need to talk this out, so we’re on the same page when Mallory gets here. This is no time to think of doing someone’s hair.”
“Said the naked man with ulterior motives.”
I chuckle. “Well yeah, there’s that too.”
But she doesn’t move off me. Instead, she lifts my hand and puts it on her heart.
“Yours,” she says.
“Mine.”
“Coral was shocked. I said I was feeling sick and asked her to reschedule my appointments,” she says pouring us an iced tea.
“Great. Now let’s plan how we’re going forward with this bullying issue.”
“I want to address it right away. I have an appointment with the high school principal tomorrow. She sounded reasonable.”
“Good. Want me to go with you? Maybe if she’s an Maverick fan, she’ll keep a better eye on how Mallory’s treated.”
“God, I hope that’s not what she’d base her care on. No offense.”
I chuckle be
cause that was spoken like a true parent. A good one. My lack of parenting experience shows. But Charlotte doesn’t realize the power of fame. Yet.
“None taken. But it wouldn’t hurt for me to just show up. If you’re agreeable.”
She laughs a little. “Yeah. I’d love to have you in my corner.”
“I’d like to talk with Mallory,” I say.
Charlotte’s head tilts as she considers my request. “What are you going to say?” she asks placing our drinks on the table and taking a seat across from me.
“I’ll be gentle. But I want her to hear the male voice. I’m the only one here who’s been a sixteen-year-old boy.”
“Well that’s true.”
“And most importantly I need her to know she has me as backup. Not just as a casual friend, but as a person who cares deeply about her well-being. But I also want to tell her I believe she needs to learn to stand up for herself. Nobody’s gonna be with her one hundred percent of the time. She has to become her own champion.”
Before Charlotte has a chance to respond, we hear the key in the door. When it swings open Mallory sizes up the room.
“Hi,” she says. There’s no smile.
“Don’t put your purse down. We’re going for a ride.”
I get a sour look for my effort. “I’m not in the mood for a pep talk from you and my mother.”
“Who said anything about a pep talk? And your mother’s not invited. I have to go to the field and I want you to come with me.”
She glances at her mother who adds, “You don’t have to go. We can sit and talk if you want.”
Her answer is to turn and walk out the door.
Obviously I’m the lesser two evils.
“We’ll be back,” I say, grabbing my keys.
We walk through the tunnel and into the bright light of the field. Our only companions are the groundskeepers and the caretakers working the stands.
“Come on,” I say leading the way to the batting cage. “Take my bag. Leave yours against the cage.”
“What exactly are we doing here?” Mallory says with no sign of enthusiasm.
“I’ve got to work my shoulder. I need you to pitch a few to me.”
I point to the mound. “Go out as far as you think. Maybe half way. The balls are in my bag.”
“You’ve got to be kidding. I can’t pitch to a major leaguer.”
“Yes you can. Just pitch it underhand. Go on.”
She looks at me like I’ve got two noses, but she heads for the spot. There’s some mumbled words passing under her breath, and I’d bet they’re aimed at me. I’m gonna ignore them all.
I see her unzip the bag and take out one of the twenty balls I put in there. When she sees how many there are, she shakes her head.
“Are you planning on staying till dark?” she calls sarcastically.
“If that’s what it takes.”
I pick up the bat leaning against the cage and walk to home plate. Taking my familiar stance, I give a few practice swings.
“Okay. Let’s see what you’ve got.”
She centers herself and let’s one go. It’s high, but I’ve got it. WHACK! The bat connects with it and it sails over her head and into left field. She ducks unnecessarily with the sound and power of the swing.
“See that. You can pitch. I’d be on base with that one.”
There’s a little smile on her face. Another ball is taken from the bag. She stares me down this time, just like a big leaguer. But her pitch is wide, and it goes sailing out of reach.
“What the hell was that?” I laugh.
Now she’s relaxing. She gets another ball and digs her feet into ground. “Everybody deserves a bad pitch. Watch this one.”
She steps into the underhand throw and lets it fly. It’s right in the sweet spot. I swing and connect hard with the pitch. The ball goes flying, up, up, far into right field. It’s close enough to a home run for me to start for the bases, raising my arms in a victorious run. All the while she’s laughing and cheering the fact that she pitched me a good ball.
“I did it! Oh my God! Wait till I tell Mom!”
I run the bases slowly, acting like a fool all the way. Going backwards, skipping and dancing, whatever it takes to lighten the moment. When I get to home plate, I pretend to be tired and lean on my knees. Then I call her over.
“Let’s take a break. I’m not used to this. Wanna sit in the dugout?”
Her eyes light up and she nods. “Okay.”
We walk to the dugout and make our way inside. It looks like nothing special to me, but I can see her impression. She’s wowed.
“Pretty cool, huh?”
I sit on the bench and she picks a spot a few spaces away. I look at her until she can’t ignore my stare.
“I want to plead my case for you staying in Memphis.”
Right away her eyes darken, and the wall goes up. “I knew it.”
“Okay. You’ve got to cut me some slack. I’m new at this whole thing.”
“What whole thing?”
Suddenly I’m not sure how much to tell her. I think it should be the truth, but how much?
“The whole I’m in love with a woman who has a child thing. A child I could love too. I don’t know how to say it. It sounds corny, but it’s true.”
She stays silent.
“I know you’re unhappy here.”
“I am.”
“I think I know how things can change without you leaving town.”
“You’re saying that because of my mother. You want her to stay.”
“You’re half right. I do want her to stay. I want to have the time it takes to find out if we could be a real family. That’s not something that happens in a matter of weeks. It’s something that requires time spent together. Not just her and I, but the three of us.”
More silence.
“I’ve never been with someone who has a child. I’ve never had to come second in any woman’s life. But that’s how it would be with your mom. You come first. I like that about her, though. It’s how good parents operate. How they love.”
Now a faint smile. “You said half right.”
“Yeah. This half I do know from experience. I want you to stay and face your fears. It’s the only way you’re gonna get rid of them.”
“What am I gonna do, beat up every person who makes fun of me?”
“No. But changing schools isn’t the answer either. I wish it wasn’t true but that would only bring new bullies in the picture. Until you stand up for yourself it’s gonna continue. You need to change your reaction.”
A tear runs down her cheek.
“I had to do that too. I was a chubby kid. No, scratch that. I was fat.”
“Yeah, there’s that too,” she says looking down.
“Let’s talk about that. Have you noticed you’re getting taller since we met? And I bet you’ve lost at least five pounds. That’s what happens when we’re your age. We blossom into a new person. I can tell you’re gonna be a butterfly very soon.”
“Oh yeah. More like a caterpillar,” she laughs.
“You are! You look just like your mother, and maybe even a little more beautiful. But don’t tell her I said that. I think she’s about perfect.”
There’s a happier look on her face but it’s still mixed with doubt. She wants it to be true but isn’t convinced.
“I think it’s only gonna take one time for you to speak up when you’re bullied to change the course.”
“But they make me cry. Then I freeze. I think of things to say afterwards in my room.”
“And I bet they’re really good ones, right?”
“Yeah.”
“Here’s what you do. You think about what that person would be sensitive about and throw it back to them. Maybe acne? Or a big nose? Something they see in themselves as a flaw. I know it’s mean, but once in a great while I think it’s okay if it stops then from hurting others.”
“Problem is he’s really good looking. And he’s an athlete.”
“Everyone has a weak point. Find his.”
“What did you say to your bully?”
“I stood in front of the class one day and this asshole Tim made a mooing sound like a cow. He’d do that all the time. So that day I turned the tables and gave him a nickname he didn’t like.”
“What was it?”
“Well, I don’t know if you’re gonna appreciate this, it’s kinda a boy thing. But I said, ‘I can lose weight. What’re you gonna do about your little problem, Tiny Tim?’”
She starts laughing. “I get it. I watched Magic Mike with Paige. But was that true?”
“I have no idea. But I knew just the suggestion it might be was enough to shut him up. Mean, huh?”
“Not really. They deserve it.”
“It’s hard to get the courage to speak up. But once you do you deflate the situation. It’s worth a try.”
“I don’t know if I can.”
“Just let me say this. When you realize you’re smarter than they are, you’ve got it made. Nobody can hurt you in the same way after that.”
We sit silently for a few minutes. Neither of us add any further comments.
She’s processing.
Just like her mother.
10
Charlotte
The early morning ray of sun is spotlighting our entwined fingers. His, so masculine, able to protect and please me. Mine, feminine and able to sooth and hold him gently. I’ve been awake for an hour, lying in Atticus’s arms. It’s the only place I feel safe. It’s unfathomable to think we might have to live apart. We’ve talked about making things work long distance and I know we’d do everything to make it happen. But what’s the reality?
The more I think of it the clearer it gets. I’ve got to convince Mallory our best chance at happiness lies here, with Atticus. Even if I have to home school, even if she needs to be in a private school. I’ll work three jobs and do whatever it takes to stay. It seems clear now.
High school orientation is today, and so’s our appointment with Mrs. Wagner, the Principal. I’m trying to be hopeful about both because school starts soon. After talking things over with Mallory, she hesitatingly agreed to go today if Paige could go with her. It was a small request and one I was happy to arrange. The girls wanted to have a sleepover at Paige’s then go together.
