Shaking my head I back against the wall. “What is this? What haven't you told me? I don’t- who are you?!” She walks around the table towards me but I toss the papers in her face, storming up the several stairs to the attic, to my place. There are no locks, but I put the chair in the way and she won’t be able to get in if she tries.
Once alone, I collapse on the floor and stare up at my cranes. The window is open and there is a breeze that enters the room, inspiring my birds to fly though they are held back by their strings. They are not as free as they would like to think.
It’s like a message.
Mother - that woman - doesn’t try to come to me, though I hear her start up the stairs several times only to hurry back down. I listen and wonder how on earth any of this happened. The documents, some half unfinished, said that I had different parents than the woman below me.
The night settles and I’m shivering as I've packed up my most precious belongings and when midnight hits, I tiptoe down the stairs like so many other evenings before. I go to her door, but this time I won’t cross the threshold. I listen from there, waiting for that snore.
Once it begins, I hasten down the rest of the steps and step outside. Except this time, Garrett isn't around to say hello or frighten me. This time, I am completely alone with my bag that I keep close against my chest. Now, I’m just scared. It had seemed a good idea when I was stomping around before, angrily blustering about. But in the quiet night, now I'm not so sure this is the best idea.
Only with the thought of my unknown past can I step forward- to where Garrett is. As I walk out of my gate slowly, it feels surreal like a dream that I don’t know if it will end well. Whispering to myself that it’s okay, I walk barefoot and make my way down the hill to Garrett’s house.
He showed it to me, one of the few times we sneaked out. Basic cream colored, no shutters, slight porch and thriving garden. He pointed out his window was just around the corner. My heart hammers as I start to where he pointed once long ago, and I rap my knuckles on the window, hoping he shows.
Garrett always does.
When I wake up, I don’t remember where I am and I feel thoughts of terror takeover me. Mother’s whispers in the dark remind me of monsters and horrors untold, and I can barely breathe until someone squeezes my hand.
I’m with Garrett, and the events are coming back. All the crazy things that have happened in the last three days.
One, I found that mother is not my mother but some stranger who raised me.
Two, I woke up on Garrett’s floor - he had kicked me off in his sleep and I was too tired to move - and he introduced me to his family and I helped his mother cook and I made paper cranes as I watched Garrett pack for school.
Three was yesterday and that’s where I was up early with the sun and meeting everyone who is saying goodbye to Garrett - there were so many boys I didn’t know what to do and hid in Garrett’s room with my cranes, practicing a little ballet to settle my nerves.
It's an all day party that is only going to be interrupted with the ceremony this afternoon. It's barely eleven and I'm waking up to find Garrett dressing up in a suit, looking cheerful. “We were up so early and late. How do you do it?” I shake my head in disbelief. “I feel like I just got into bed, yet the sun is shining,” I give him a pointed look.
He messes my hair, and rolls his eyes. "You obviously haven't been to high school. Everyone is getting ready. We're going to have lunch and then head out to the school because my mom wants good seats. Plus, you have to meet my friends."
"Friends?" On occasion he had mentioned names, but since I'm out of my comfort zone and in his house, it's weird to realize once again that there are so many people that are a part of Garrett's life. How does he juggle everyone?
He grins. "They're cool. Come on. Hope you're hungry, my mom is making us her famous tacos."
"Tacos?" Garrett gives me a look and mutters about how uncultured I am again. However I get up and sock him on the shoulder. "Kidding," I grin. "I'm in America, I have a computer. I'm not stupid." I braid my hair as we walk towards the kitchen.
The family is nice and very friendly, although I can tell they think this situation is strange. To be honest, it really is but I don't know what else to do. Garrett just told them I had a rough family situation and was going to hang out for a little while, and that's all. It seems to have worked, I suppose.
After tacos, all of us pile up into three vehicles. As usual, I'm squished in there with Garrett who is holding onto his black gown and fiddling with the hat. "Those look funny," I shake my head and tug on the tassel.
"They look stupid," he corrects me. "They're telling us to move on with our lives into greatness but they're telling us to look all the same while we're doing it. Len is going in the nude to protest."
I stare at Garrett. "Is that allowed?"
He shrugs. "I guess. I mean, he's still wearing the gown, but - just, you know, nothing underneath that."
Giggling, I shake my head. "Well, that's very silly. He might get a little cold." That makes him laugh and we joke about it until his parents ask what is so funny. That shuts Garrett up, so I close my mouth as well. We don't really say anything until we're there.
He has to join his friends and line up for the ceremony. I sit with his family awkwardly through the entire ordeal. It's hard for me to focus, because there are so many people here, it's crazy. I didn't know there were so many and so close by.
That is, I knew there had to be, it made sense what with all the numbers and the media and the technology. I knew the numbers, I just didn't know how many people there might be. It's so exciting and scary all at once.
After the ceremony, everyone is having fun and talking and taking pictures. I meet Len and he leads me to find a drinking fountain when I mention I'm thirsty. He looks at me curiously and I just glance at his black down, praying we don't get any sudden strong winds.
"So are you two a thing?"
"A thing?" I wrinkle my nose, unfamiliar with the terminology. "We're two people."
"No, I mean together," he shakes his head with a goofy grin. I shrug at his remark and he pokes me teasingly. "Are you dating? Garrett won't say a thing. He said you two have been friends for years but he's rarely mentioned you."
That hurts a little bit, but I try to shrug it off. "Oh. Um... well, we're not dating. I'm sort of... I just... I have family issues," I try to find the vague excuses in my head that Garrett's been using. "And I was homescooled."
Slowly, Len nods as though this all makes perfect sense. "Oh, okay. Cool. Man it sucks that he's leaving then, isn't it? Are you going to leave, too?"
Leave to go where? I just shrug. "I don't think so." I've barely finished my sentence when someone is shouting Len's name. A girl nearly mows over me in order to tackle the boy, shrieking. After a minute, I realize that it's laughter and I watch the two of them running off and holding hands.
Gnawing my lip, I sigh and glance around at the school grounds. They're so big and I wonder what it would have been like to attend school like this. I've read the stories and Garrett's told me all about his experiences here. All the same, it's so different once you're actually here. I touch the lockers, and tug at the locks. Everything is just how I dreamed, but at the same time it's really not.
For a few minutes, I wander around and tug at the flowered dress that Garrett said would be appropriate for this event. He said it was pretty and that it made my hair look pretty. The memory makes me smile and I realize I should go find him.
That's when someone tugs at my dress. “Hey, pretty girl.”
Jumping, I turn around, and tug at my dress. There's two boys there, smiling at me. "Oh, sorry. Um, hi. How are you?" I volunteer.
"Pretty good. A little lonely, though, if you know what I mean."
Pushing my bangs from my face, I shrug and glance around, trying to recall where the crowds were. "Oh, well there's many people just around um, one of these corners. I don't remember which one, but there's a big party
going on, and everyone is still here."
"You're really cute," the other boy interrupts, walking forward. "Incredibly cute. So why are you alone?"
"But you're here," I shrug, backing up to allow for space in this conversation. But that's when I hit my head against a locker, and realize I've run out of space. I frown and wonder if these boys have heard of personal space. Maybe they're not that bright, I suppose.
He touches my arm, and I shrug away, because I don't like that. I want to be with Garrett and I glance away, trying to remember the direction from which I came from. Maybe it was to the left? Looking at these two strangers, I realize I don't like their smiles and a shiver runs down my spine. It's like they know a secret that I don't have.
They laugh like I told them a joke but I don't think any of this is funny. The other boy touches my waist, and I slap at his hand as they start saying their own jokes. I don't understand a lot of them, but its enough to make my cheeks blush.
"Excuse me, I need to go," I try telling them loudly, but when I try to walk away, they won't let me.
I finally understand what mother meant by monsters. They weren’t like dragons that tear apart cities and homes and eat people. They look so normal, not like I had expected. These monsters look like everyone. But when you realize exactly what they are, it’s too late.
Nothing happened, Garrett found me in time. But the monsters had done enough to scare me through to eternity. Len had showed up with him, and they both shoved the guys away. Except that in a way, it was too late. I couldn't stop shaking and it hurt to breathe.
“I can’t,” I stammered when he came to my rescue. “G-Gare I can’t. I- I want to go home. I have to go home. I need to go home. Home, Garrett, home. Please, take me now. Now, please.”
He tried to talk me out of it, he tried to tell me how sorry it was, but nothing he said was going to fix the way I could still feel those fingers still digging into my bare flesh. I felt like filth and couldn't wipe it off no matter how hard I scrubbed and scratched.
Am I more scared now than I was with the monsters? I can’t decide. My mind isn’t clear enough to make such a decision.
Garrett drives me back to his house while everyone is still having fun. I couldn't look at them and Garrett tried so hard to talk with me and keep me happy. But the damage was done, and I was silent as he handed me my bag.
That's when the tears started. I managed to give him a quick hug before running out the door. I needed my home, old and dark but it was my sanctuary. I race through the protective gate and up to the door I’ve opened so many times. How could I have been so foolish? Mother was right, and I've learned my lesson.
Two months, and I finally began to recover. Another month, the nightmares were gone and I was brave enough to peak out the front door. Three months after, I’m starting to miss Garrett again. At the end of five months, I feel fine but everything is too quiet these days, even when mother lets me listen to the records at their loudest.
So I’ve spent all this time reading and it’s reminded me that maybe some of this really does happen- and worse things happen, too. I wasn’t really hurt. I was… frightened. Very, very frightened, a feeling I’ve never really had to face much because my home is so safe and secure and happy. I think about it often as I make my paper cranes.
“How many have you made, dear?” Mother comes up, kissing my forehead before settling on the couch beside me. She puts a steaming cup of raspberry cinnamon tea on the coffee table for me.
“Nine hundred and ninety three,” I smile. I make them faster these days now. I average about a five a day. And when you’ve made one thousand paper cranes, you watch them fly in the wind and make a wish. At least, that's what the fairy tales say, and I want to take a stab at it.
She pats my knee. “Good for you. Almost there.”
Automatically, I nod and pause as she gets up. “Mother?” She pauses. “Will you tell me? Please?” I add the plea, hoping she won't ignore me.
We've essentially ignored the drama that occurred and gone back to how it was. It was easier, I suppose, for the two of us. But every time she looks at me, every time she says a single word and every time she touches me, the questions come flooding back. Where could I come from, if not from here?
There’s a fake smile on her face. “Tell you what, dear?”
“About me.” I bite my lip, worried. “Please, I won’t be mad. I just… why can’t I know? Why were you so upset?”
“Because you’re mine,” she answers me easily. I frown, and I watch as she moves back her dark hair and sighs before sitting back down, albeit a little farther back. “All right, child, I’ll tell you.
"You were to be born into a rich family. I was the housekeeper, and took care of the family. I still remember the day they found out you were coming into their lives. They were very, very happy. They had waited so long for you, you know. And I'd been a midwife before, so I was going to help her through the delivery.
"However, it was towards the end where the troubles began. Not with you, but with them. Problem after problem, and they kept blaming each other for their unhappiness. They were so angry. Then, your father was taken away for embezzlement, and your mother cried every day.
"We had begun adoption papers before you were born, but the birth was too difficult, and she couldn't handle it. Her heart was already broken and it couldn't be healed. Your father passed away in prison shortly thereafter, and I didn't know what else to do."
When she falls silent, I finish for her. “You took me and raised me as your own?” I curl up my legs and wrap my arms around my knees. “What if they found me?”
She sighs, looking towards the window and for a moment she seems sad. "I started hiding, I suppose, and after a while I couldn't stop. So much terror happens out there, my child. Too much. I wanted us to be safe from that."
Garrett returns, although not quite as I had expected. His hair is longer and he looks very much the same, but there's a stronger sense of independence and free will about him. Not to mention, he climbs the rose vines outside to the attic to talk to me.
I’d been dancing and thinking about the last paper crane I was going to make, and what my wish would be. So when he tumbled over my balcony, I didn’t know what to expect, and I couldn't help but shriek.
“Olivia?” Mother calls up confusion.
“I- I’m fine,” I call hurriedly towards the door, closing it so she won't think to come here. “I- I fell, I’m fine.” Then I whirl around, racing towards the balcony. “Garrett?”
Groaning slightly, he rolls onto his back and offers me a foolish grin. “Good, so you do remember me.”
Shaking my head, I give him a look and help him to his feet. “What are you doing? Why did you climb that? You could have fallen and died, Garrett. You can’t just go climbing up to attics any time you want.”
“If they all had you in them, I’d climb them all the time,” he scoffs, checking his elbow. I’m sure there’ll be a bruise but right now, he’s covered in little pecks of blood like bright red freckles because of the roses’ thorns.
I'm not sure I understand his last statement so I just stare at him in disbelief. “You’re so stupid.”
“Thanks?” He looks confused, and I lead him to the second floor, to my bathroom. He stares around because he’s never really been inside before. He keeps asking hushed questions and staring and wondering aloud but I tell him to shut up as I lead him across my room into my bathroom.
Grabbing the first aid kit, I sit him on the edge of my tub to start fixing his wounds. "I can't believe you were so stupid, trying to climb that vine. You barely made it up last time, in case you don't recall. What would I have done if you fell and couldn't get up?"
“You know, I wouldn’t have had to do that if you ever came out anymore.”
“Who says I don’t go out?”
“I do. I’ve been watching your house all week since I got back,” he confesses, and rubs his neck. He does that when things get too awkward.
/> I slap his hand, taking it back to pour some rubbing alcohol on it. He winces, making a face but doesn’t say a word. “So… how’s my Rapunzel?” He asks after a minute, the little nickname he’s given me so often. I shake my head, not saying anything. “Aw, 'Livi, please…
“Olivia.” The way he says my name makes me pause and look up through my hair. “Aren’t we still friends?” Garrett asks with a concerned expression. “Don’t you care? Because I care about you. I’ve been worried sick for the last several months. You don’t have a phone and you never really get the mail, what am I supposed to do?”
I suppose I hadn't thought about this. I swallow, and try to shake back the feelings I've been ignoring. Chewing my lip, I shrug. “I don’t… I don’t know…”
He continues staring me down. “Are you mad at me?”
“No,” I shake my head.
“Are you mad at the world?”
I falter, and gaze up at him, trying to read what he’s getting at. “W-what?”
Garrett covers my hands with his, the ones that rest on his other forearm to clean up the bloody cuts. “Are you mad at the world? You can’t… I’m so sorry, Livi, for not being there fast enough. I’m sorry I didn’t keep you by my side every minute of the day, I really am sorry.
“But you can’t blame the world for two idiots, it’s not the world’s fault. It’s no one’s fault but those jerks. And there are people like that, because not everyone is good - we’re all human and every human is imperfect. You read those stories for the happy endings but that’s only after they’ve conquered the villain, isn’t it?”
His speech makes me think as much as I don’t want to- but he has such a valid point. “You mean they’re the villains in my life?”
Grinning, he pulls me up to level with him. “I don’t know. I’ve faced a lot of them. I’ve faced people who don’t like the way I dress, they don’t like my music, or they just don’t like me. I’ve had bad things happen to me, too, Olivia. But you don’t see that stopping me.”
World of Monsters Page 2
