That left just Efren and I. He bent down over the remains of his sister.
“Novalic,” he rasped.
He stood up, a bunch of curly red hair clutched in his pale hand.
“You spent much time with my sister during her last days.” He squinted at me through the thick grey smoke. “You know that she didn’t do this.”
I took a deep breath, unsure of how to respond.
“Was she not sharing your bed the nights these humans and Celice disappeared?”
“Evidently not,” I said coldly.
The accusatory tone of his voice put me on edge.
Brushing away sweat from his forehead with the back of his sleeve, he staggered a few steps toward me.
“This was all so unlike her,” he said softly. “Yes, she loved Rhys, but she never would have done something so foolish. She valued her life more than this.” He held up the clump of hair. “Wouldn’t you agree?”
I took a step away from him and started walking toward the woods.
“Wait.”
I turned around slowly to face him again.
He narrowed his eyes on me.
“I know you have something to do with this. Why else would she behave the way she did? You did something to her that made her get this insane idea into her head. Maybe she did even murder Celice and let all the humans free. But there had to be some other incentive than taking vengeance on Rhys. An incentive that only came about once she started seeing you…”
I glared back at him.
“Careful, warlock,” I said. “I would think long and hard before making accusations of me.”
He backed down.
But as I left, I felt his eyes follow me.
Chapter 9: Mona
Rhys left early the next morning to look for his sister’s body. He hoped that they would be able to give her a proper funeral. He thought perhaps the corpse might have washed up along the shore of our island. When he returned a few hours later unsuccessful, he concluded that it must have floated too far already, or been eaten by a shark.
All rituals were canceled for three days as the siblings mourned the loss of Celice. The first two days Rhys didn’t exchange a word even with me. He, Julisse and Arielle locked themselves up in the spell room. But by the third night, Rhys returned to our bedroom just before midnight.
I shivered as his body brushed against mine, his arm reaching over my waist as he rested his chin on my bare shoulder.
His breathing became heavier as he fell asleep.
I felt sick beneath his touch. The weight of his strong arm pressing against my stomach made me want to throw up. Adding more pressure than I was already bearing from murdering two young women.
I reached for his hand and slid out from underneath him, walking over to the balcony.
I looked back at Rhys’ face. I did this sometimes when he was sleeping to detect in him any traces of the person he used to be.
He was frowning, his lips tight, as if in pain. It was an expression I seldom saw in him when he was awake. It reminded me of when he was a boy. My best friend. I’d known all his expressions so well then and I still kept them treasured in my memory.
Another pang of guilt hit me.
I remembered the agony of losing my own family. I didn’t wish that pain on Rhys. And yet I had caused it so carelessly.
“I’m sorry,” I breathed.
I walked back over to the bed and brushed away his wavy dark hair from his face, placing a gentle kiss on his forehead. He stirred and opened his eyes. He reached for me and wrapped his arms around me, pulling me beneath the covers. I rested my head against his chest, listening to his heartbeat. Even though it cut me to think of the suffering he was going through, the fact that he could still experience pain and loss brought me comfort. When he was awake, he concealed his feelings so well that I’d believed he didn’t have them.
“I’m sorry,” I repeated, louder this time.
He grunted and rolled over on his side, his back facing me.
I broke down into tears.
“I’m so sorry you lost your sister.”
Sobs racked my body as all the tension built up over the last few days flooded out. I reached my arm around him and pressed my wet cheek against his back. He tensed beneath my touch. Then he turned back around to face me. He sat up in bed, looking down at me.
“It’s been a heavy loss,” he said, his voice hoarse, as he brushed away my tears with his thumb. “But you ought not to cry over it. I told Julisse and Arielle the same. It may be difficult to bear now, but we must see it as a test to make us all stronger.”
I shouldn’t have expected his response to be any different. Rhys always did see everything that happened in life in light of the Cause. Even the death of his own sister.
Neither of us slept that night. His hands ran through my hair absentmindedly as I lay against him. It was hard to relax beneath his touch after the night’s events. I shivered as I thought about the strength of those hands. How they had ripped Tiarni’s hair from her skull. Those hands that now caressed me so gently would have treated me just as they had Tiarni had he known that I was the cause of his sister’s death.
* * *
Rhys rose early, took a shower and dressed.
“Things will return to normal now that we have caught the traitor,” he said, fastening a cloak around him. “We have wasted too much time already. Isolde was so close to making a breakthrough.”
I didn’t know what this breakthrough was, but I dared not ask. I feared the answer.
“I don’t sense that you’re particularly bothered our rituals have been delayed,” he said, eyeing me as I lay in bed.
I rubbed my head in my hands and sighed. The last thing I wanted right now was one of Rhys’ tirades about how I didn’t share the same passion as him for our ancestors’ cause.
“I’m just… tired, Rhys. It’s been a difficult few days.”
He crossed his arms over his chest and stared down at me.
I groaned internally. He was going to take out his frustration on me. I knew Rhys better than he knew himself sometimes.
Even though he seemed to believe that he was above experiencing emotions, he wasn’t. They just built up and manifested themselves in different ways. And I was normally the one to bear the brunt of his mood swings.
I stood up.
“You’re right,” I muttered. “I don’t share the same enthusiasm as you for these rituals.”
“I’ve warned you before. If you don’t align yourself with the will of our Ancients as the rest of us do, sooner or later you’ll fall into trouble again. And this time, I won’t be able to make any more exceptions for you.” He walked over to me and gripped my shoulders. “Don’t you trust me? Is that what this is? After all we’ve been through together, you still can’t surrender?”
I stared into his intense black eyes. It felt like I already had lost myself to him.
“You know that I can make you as powerful as me. I can make you a Channeler,” he breathed, his mouth inches away from my ear. “Remember what I’ve always told you, Mona. With surrender comes freedom. If you’d just let me show you…”
He let go of me and stormed out. The room shook as he slammed the door shut behind him.
But his last words echoed around in my head long after he’d left our apartment.
“With surrender comes freedom.”
Maybe that’s what I have to do.
Maybe the only way out of this darkness is to first plunge myself further into it.
Maybe I have to be lost in order to be found.
Chapter 10: Kiev
“I’m sorry I doubted you about those humans.” Helina sat perched on the edge of her bed.
Erik was leaning against the edge of the small table in the corner of her bedroom, while I was seated in a chair in the corner of the room.
“I was just so fearful,” she continued. “We can’t lose you again, Kiev.”
I stared at my siblings. It still felt stra
nge to be in their presence. Although they were so familiar to me, they were also like strangers.
I got up and walked over to Helina, planting a kiss on her forehead. I wanted to promise her that she wouldn’t lose me again. After everything they’d been through without me, I owed them that much. But I couldn’t. Just as I wasn’t able to promise Mona that anything would work out between us. Because I didn’t know. Especially now.
“I suppose you understand now why it’s not a good idea to mess with Rhys,” Erik said dryly.
I remained silent.
“There’s something else I should have mentioned earlier,” Erik continued. “Around the back of this building is a trapdoor. None of us are supposed to even know it exists, but I caught Julisse coming out of it one day. Anyway, it’s an underground chamber. The witches’ spell room. Never go in there, no matter what.”
I raised a brow.
“Once a vampire goes in there, he doesn’t come out. Only witches are allowed in a spell room. If any other creature goes in there, the power of the room diminishes. All these years of building up the room’s potency, gone for nothing. The only way to prevent this waste is to sacrifice the person who’s stepped inside.”
“Sacrifice?”
Erik nodded grimly. “I don’t know what they’d do because we’ve never witnessed it. But just… stay away from that damn room, will you?”
“Promise, Kiev,” Helina said, tugging on my arm.
“All right. I’ll stay away.”
We all fell silent. The image of Tiarni burning alive at the stake was still fresh in our minds. Erik heaved a sigh and sat down in a chair.
“I’m sorry, Kiev,” he muttered.
“What?”
“I’m sorry that you’re in this situation because of us. I know it’s far from ideal.”
His words surprised me.
“What situation?”
“Being here… on this island. Bound to serve the witches.”
“Why would you apologize? I thought you were just telling me recently how great life here is, you two being Lord and Lady of this place.”
His shoulders sagged and he rested his forehead in his hand.
“You know it’s not,” Helina said quietly. “I guess believing that life is better here helps us cope.”
“Well, if there’s anything you should be sorry for,” I said, my voice rising, “it’s chasing away Matteo and making it look like I set him up.”
My blood boiled just recalling what they’d done, the look in Matteo’s eyes as he boarded his ship. I still hadn’t forgiven them for what they’d done. I wasn’t sure that I ever could.
“We’re sorry for that too,” Erik said.
Helina placed a hand on my arm. “But we had to do it. It would have been too dangerous for you to stay on the island otherwise. If Rhys had found out you had ties with Matteo…” She gulped.
I brushed her away from me.
“You could have told me that. I could have broken things off with Matteo myself. There was no excuse for what you did.”
Neither argued back. Their heads hung.
I placed my head in my hands, trying to stop recalling that painful day. I remained quiet for several minutes as I reeled in my temper.
“It’s done now,” I said eventually.
I walked out of the room, leaving them in their guilty silence, and exited my sister’s apartment.
On returning to my own apartment, I was surprised to see Mona waiting for me in my bedroom. Her hair was tied back in a tight bun, and she wore a high-necked black dress that touched the floor.
She looked paler than ever. Her lips trembled as she opened her mouth to speak.
“I can’t see you any more.”
I stopped walking toward her as a tear spilled down her cheek.
“We’ve covered our tracks. And now I can’t keep seeing you behind Rhys’ back. I don’t want to be responsible for throwing another person into the fire.”
I remained silent, my eyes fixed on hers.
“And I can’t keep living in between two men like this. I don’t even know what we had to begin with, but whatever it was…” She swallowed hard and looked down at the floor. “It’s over, Kiev.”
Chapter 11: Mona
I wasn’t sure that I’d ever be able to get that vampire out of my subconscious. But I knew that I had to try, or I would fail to become powerful enough to break free from Rhys. To become a true Channeler of our Ancients.
I just have to hope that I make it out the other end.
I waited until after that night’s ritual to tell Rhys. As we crossed the courtyard heading back to our room, I gripped his arm and tugged him to a stop. He looked at me questioningly. I led him to the fountain and stopped in front of it.
I slipped both of my hands into his. Looking down at the ground, I cleared my throat.
“I’ve been thinking about what you said.” My voice trembled as I spoke. “I’ll do it. I’ll stop resisting.”
His black eyes bored into me. His thumb reached beneath my chin and pushed my head up so that I was forced to face him.
“You know what this means, right?”
I nodded, my throat drying out.
“Why do you want this?”
“I want to stop living my life in limbo,” I whispered, shutting my eyes.
It’s too painful.
He breathed out. “I’ve been telling you to take this leap since the beginning. What’s made you decide now?”
“Because I want to be yours, Rhys. I know we are bonded, but that doesn’t make me truly yours until I’ve become like you.”
“Why do you want me now? What’s changed since you returned to me?”
I bit my lip.
“I’m not sure. I just know something has changed.” I winced at how unconvincing I sounded.
He crossed his arms over his chest, frowning at me.
“Mona, I have to be sure you really are ready for this. Because once we start, there’s no going back. You either complete this successfully and gain the ability to channel our Ancients’ power, or you break.”
“I-I understand,” I stammered.
He stared at me long and hard. Then he took my hand and transported us back to our bedroom.
“Sit down,” he ordered.
I sat on the bed.
He bent down to my level and gripped my jaw. “You’re fearful,” he said. “That’s not a good first sign.”
I bit my lip.
“This fear must go. You need to welcome this challenge with open arms, not fearing it.”
He stood up abruptly.
“Get up.”
“What?”
“Walk over to the balcony.”
I stared at him, confused. He glared and pointed to the open balcony doors.
“Stand up on the balcony railing. But do not use magic to balance yourself.”
I eyed the railing.
“There’s no way I can balance myself on that without magic.”
“Just do it.”
I threw him another glance before making my way over to the balcony. I looked over the edge. Then I wished I hadn’t reminded myself how many hundreds of feet we were above ground.
I gripped the railing. Chills ran across my skin.
“There’s no way I can do this without magic,” I repeated.
He walked onto the balcony and stood next to me.
“Do you think I would ask you to do this if I thought you incapable of it? Do you think I want to murder you?”
I don’t know.
“No,” I muttered.
Keeping my eyes away from the steep drop, I lifted one shaking foot onto the ledge and tried to balance before raising the other one.
This is impossible.
I held onto one of the balcony pillars as both feet were now balancing on the railing.
“Now let go of the pillar.”
My heart hammered against my chest.
There’s no way I can do this.
&n
bsp; Closing my eyes, I chanted a balancing charm in my mind, hoping that Rhys wouldn’t notice I was using magic.
I let go, pretending to flail my arms about as I balanced perfectly.
As I moved away from the column and walked to the center, the spell lifted. A gust of wind blew against me, making me lose my footing. Gravity sucked me downward, and the wind rushed past me as I hurtled toward the ground.
I tried to scream out a levitation charm but it didn’t have any effect. My powers seemed to have completely drained out of me. My eyes watered from the wind and I closed my eyes, preparing for the impact.
I expected my body to shatter, but instead, I found myself being caught by two strong arms, my body parallel with the ground, about three feet away from it. Rhys was levitating above me.
He lowered me gently to the ground, then pulled me upright.
My knees crumpled and I curled up on the floor, shaking.
“I told you not to use magic,” Rhys said.
“I would have fallen even faster had I not,” I gasped, glaring up at him.
“That’s not the point,” he said calmly. “I told you not to use it. If you want to succeed at this, you need to follow my instructions blindly. You are not to consider the consequences.” He bent down closer to me, brushing the hair away from my face. “Your only duty is to trust me.”
I continued to shake.
“Clearly, you still have not understood this. You need more practice. Tomorrow, we’ll give you just that.”
More practice.
His words plagued me as I lay in bed that night.
Chapter 12: Mona
Rhys made us leave our apartment early the next morning. We stopped outside his aunt Isolde’s door a few meters along from ours.
The witch came to the door after a few knocks, wearing a woolen night gown, her long grey-streaked hair tied up above her head in a bun.
“Mona and I will be leaving for a while,” Rhys said. “I’m not sure when we’ll return. So go on with the rituals without us.”
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