“Jah,” John said, but Isaac saw worry in his eyes. “She’s getting worse, I fear. The last doctor we saw said she should be on complete bedrest, but that wife of mine…” His voice shook. “She can be as pigheaded as anyone I know—Gott love her.”
“Hopefully, you’ll get some answers after the doctors do their tests,” Isaac said, handing John the bottle of water. “These Englishers aren’t like us. They have decades of education. They’ll know how to help.”
“We already know what she needs. I just can’t give it to her.”
“Grace—” Isaac cleared his throat. “Grace said something about surgery.”
John bobbed his head up and down. “The two doctors we saw in Hershey both said the same thing. But it will cost more money than I’ve ever had at one time.”
Isaac opened his mouth, ready to give another suggestion. But he had none. “Do you want me to fetch Amos?” he asked. “Send word to the sawmill?”
“Not yet,” John said, wiping his eyes with the heel of his hand. “Not until I know what happened.” He leaned over to look at the double doors that Eve had gone through. “I think if it was real serious, Lucas would’ve told me by now. He knows we want the whole family here if…”
When John’s voice faded out, a cold shudder ran up and down Isaac’s back. Surely this wasn’t life-threatening. Though…Isaac was well aware he didn’t have all the facts. Had Eve Zook been in an accident, or was this a chronic illness she’d been battling for years?
The two men sat in silence for a while, both given fresh cups of coffee as the time ticked on. Other people and patients came and went. No one stared at them. No one cared. When they weren’t closed in prayer, John’s eyes were fixed on those double doors.
Isaac crossed his arms tightly, trying to squelch the nervous feeling in his stomach. For he knew what it was like to stand on one side of a door when your spouse was on the other side.
“I don’t know what I’d do without her,” John said, staring down at his hat. “I’ve loved her since we were children. My family’s everything to me.” His voice hitched as he exhaled. “That’s why I don’t want Gracie to…” The words quivered. “It scares me to death every day—the thought of it.”
Isaac leaned in closer. “Grace is okay. She left for a while, but she’s not in danger.”
After shaking his head a few times, John lifted his gaze to Isaac’s. Pain and fear sat behind his blue eyes. “She’s a horse trainer,” he said after a deep inhale. “And she wants to keep doing it, you heard her. Wants the farm when I retire—keep the training company going. She’s capable, that’s plain to anyone.”
“Jah,” Isaac said when John didn’t go on. Of course, he knew Grace was a very skilled trainer, and if he knew her at all, he’d guess she’d want to keep it up as long as possible…until she settled down.
Suddenly, Isaac couldn’t help thinking of Collin Chupp. Was the young man just waiting in the wings until Grace decided to stop training full-time? And would John really encourage the match? Isaac felt himself shaking his head, clenching his jaw.
Isaac glanced at John when the man chuckled under his breath. “I wish someone good like you wanted to buy the company. It would ease my mind just fine.” He paused and swallowed as a fresh patch of tears filled his eyes.
Though this moment was about John’s situation, Isaac couldn’t help feeling honored that his boss thought so highly of him. The respect was certainly mutual.
“It was an accident that done it.” John continued.
“Accident?”
“My Evie,” he said. “Out of the clear blue sky. She was removing the harness like she’s done a hundred times—always careful, knew what she was doing, and that horse kicked her with both back legs, sent her five feet away. I thought he’d killed her on the spot.”
“Eve?” Isaac asked, a horrific picture forming in his mind. “Her injury was from a horse kick?”
John nodded, wiping at his eyes. “Don’t you see? They can be dangerous enough, and my…my precious daughter is out there every day, deliberately putting herself in peril.” He paused to pinch the bridge of his nose. “Please don’t ever tell her this, but that’s why I hired you. I hoped Cincinnati would be her last horse, that she’ll see how good you are and just…I don’t know…get on with her life.”
The whole picture was becoming clearer. Problem was, Isaac had been observing Grace since the day he’d arrived; she was an excellent trainer, never took unnecessary risks, respected the animals like Mother Nature herself.
In the back of his head, Isaac had wondered a few times why exactly John had hired him when he didn’t need to. So far, Grace was just as good as he was.
Now he knew. And it did not sit well.
He needed this job. He needed to provide a better life for Sadie. Was it any of his business why he’d been hired? At the same time, however, he’d hate for Grace to think he didn’t trust her.
“Would you go after her?”
Isaac glanced at John, not sure who he meant, so he gestured to the white double doors and lifted his eyebrows.
“Gracie,” John said. “Would you bring her back?”
“Of course,” Isaac said, happy to be of service, ready to be put to work. He was out the front door of the medical clinic in two seconds, though he had no idea where she might’ve gone or how long ago it had been since she’d left. He squinted up and down the streets, scanning the mix of plain and English folks on the sidewalks.
“Grace!” he called out, spotting the back of a woman’s head who looked like she could be Grace. His muscles were flexed, ready to fly down the street after her.
“Is she okay?”
He jumped at the soft voice, his muscles burning for relief.
“Is she?” Grace was standing outside of the medical clinic, leaning against a cement pillar right by the door, looking small. Isaac must’ve raced out so quickly that he didn’t notice her.
“Hey,” he said, a bit rattled, glancing at her, then at the woman down the street who was definitely not Grace Zook.
“Will Maam be okay?”
Isaac exhaled, strangely winded. “We don’t know anything yet.”
Grace nodded and moved a hand up to her throat. Her face was white as a bedsheet drying on the line, and her eyes were red, cheeks wet. Despite everything he now knew, or maybe because of it, Isaac couldn’t stop himself from moving closer.
“I’ve never seen her like that,” she said, her voice almost too quiet to hear over the street noise. “It looked like she was asleep, but she wouldn’t wake up. I thought she was…” She covered her face with both hands. Isaac could easily hear her sobs. “I’m so scared,” she cried. “I don’t know what to do. I can’t stop shaking.”
“Come with me,” Isaac said in a low voice, gently taking her by the arm and leading her a few feet away into the doorway of an empty storefront. “Just stand here,” he said, moving her so her back was against the door.
Grace nodded, her hands still covering her face.
Isaac sent one glace over his shoulder, making sure they had at least some privacy. Then he leaned in, putting his hands on the wall behind her, her head between them so the two of them were in their own little huddle.
“Dear Heavenly Father…” he said, his voice hushed in reverence. He prayed for Eve’s body, for calmness to come to John’s mind, for the doctors to know what to do, and then Isaac prayed for Grace. “Please bring peace to her heart. Help her know she is stronger than she thinks, and that she brings joy and happiness to everyone in her life.”
He hadn’t meant for his prayer to make her cry harder; he’d hoped it would ease her pain some. But when he said “amen,” Grace burst into heart-wrenching sobs.
“I’m sorry,” Isaac said, his heart breaking for her. “I thought I could help—”
“Nay, I’m sorry,” Grace said, rush
ing forward, wrapping her arms all the way around him. “I’m so sorry, Isaac.”
Isaac nearly stumbled back, surprised by the sudden embrace and the sheer inappropriate nature of it. After Grace had barely been willing to stand beside him the other day, her hug about shocked him to death. “It’s…okay,” he said, though he had no idea why she should be apologizing to him for saying a prayer.
“No, it’s not,” she said, her cheek pressed against his chest. “I can’t believe what I said in there.”
Confused, Isaac was about to ask what she meant. But when she burst into another wave of fresh sobs, he had no choice but to wrap his arms around her and hold her tight. Otherwise, he was afraid she’d break into a million pieces.
So he selfishly allowed himself to feel Grace inside his embrace, listen to her breathing—fast with sobs, then slow when crying tired her out. She was shorter than he was, but her head fit perfectly right under his chin. She sniffed and blew out a deep breath. Isaac knew that at any second she would pull away and it would all be over.
Her skin smells like lavender, he mused, quickly adding to the memory. He was surprised because the other day, she’d smelled more of hay and freshly cut grass.
“Danke,” she finally said. And just like he thought, she dropped her arms. She was looking down at her hands now, slowly rubbing them together.
“You’re welcome,” Isaac said, missing her warmth. On the heels of that, he remembered what John had said about wishing Collin could get Grace to settle down. He also recalled that John hadn’t hired Isaac because he was the best trainer around, but in hopes he would help get Grace to quit. Isaac felt his stomach roll when his thoughts added that John had specifically asked him not to divulge any of that to his daughter.
If he did, would his job be on the line?
And could it be even more on the line if John sees us together like this?
He quickly stepped back. “I still don’t know why you were apologizing to me, though.”
“I know you heard what I said to my father,” she clarified, running a hand across her forehead. “I shouldn’t have lost my temper like that. I was scared.” She took in a shaky breath. “I am scared.”
“Do you want to go back in? John was asking for you.”
Grace swallowed, as if not wanting to move just yet, but held her chin level. “I need to apologize to him, too.” Isaac could tell she was about to start crying again. “He must be so worried.”
“Let’s go inside.”
Grace nodded, and Isaac held the door open for her to enter the medical clinic. “Daed?” she said, standing a few feet away from him, like she was afraid he might really be angry.
“Come here, Gracie,” John said, standing up and opening his arms to his daughter.
Grace ran straight to him.
Isaac knew it would be this way, for there was nothing his own daughter could say or do that would keep him from welcoming her to his open arms. He stood a ways off for a while, not wanting to intrude. He heard them whispering to each other, Grace sniffling, then hugging her father around his neck.
“I’m sorry, again.” Grace was looking at Isaac now. “Please forgive me.”
“Don’t worry about it,” Isaac said, walking toward them. “Everything was…heightened.”
“You’re a good man,” John said. His eyes were still wet, but he put out his hand. Isaac shook it, squeezing it a little firmer this time. John Zook wasn’t just his boss. Isaac was beginning to respect the man as highly as his bishop back home, even though the man held his future in his hands.
They sat down again, still waiting for Lucas to give them an update. Now that things were calmer, Isaac couldn’t help but recall Grace’s words from earlier. He’d known since day one that she hadn’t wanted him there, that he had somehow taken “her” job.
But Isaac couldn’t have imagined how dire the Zooks’ situation was. Was his salary when the job was done actually taking money that could be used for a surgery to save Eve’s life? Or at least improve the quality of her life?
Guilt washed over him…a guilt that might not have been from his conscious doing, but he felt it just as strongly. Then he thought of Sadie and remembered his own reason for being in Honey Brook. Which problem was more important? His heart knew it was neither right nor fair to compare the two situations. And hadn’t he preached the same thing to Grace earlier?
He didn’t have time to dwell on the matter, for Lucas appeared, followed by the doctor who’d been in the back of the buggy.
“John,” Lucas said, “this is Kevin—Doctor Kevin McBride. Kevin, this is John Zook.”
“It’s nice to meet you, John,” the doctor said, putting a hand on John’s arm.
“Pleasure, pleasure,” John said. “M-my wife?”
“She’s resting. I gave her a mild painkiller. She said it was okay, but should I have checked with you first?”
“Nay, nay, it’s fine.” John blinked, his eyes rimmed with tears. “Can I see her?”
“In a minute,” Kevin said. “She woke up almost as soon as we finished the X-rays.”
“Hard not to with all that yelling,” Lucas said. “Was that you, Grace?”
Grace nodded, then kept her chin lowered. “I’m sorry if I disturbed anyone. I…I have no excuse.”
“Please, please,” Kevin said to her, probably noticing that she was two seconds away from crying. “There’s nothing major to worry about at this point.” He looked at John. “The compressed vertebra from the accident—you said it was from a horse kick two years ago?”
Isaac held his breath.
“Aye,” John answered.
Kevin nodded. “It hasn’t caused any additional damage that I can see, though X-rays show only so much. I can tell, however, that there’s a great amount of inflammation. Due to swelling, one of her discs has moved, pushing the two vertebrae farther apart. That is causing your wife a lot of pain.” He paused and glanced at Lucas. Lucas nodded, as if the two men had already consulted. “What she really needs, John, is a CT Scan and an MRI.”
“Fine, fine,” John said. “Do whatever you have to.”
“Thing is,” Lucas said, “we don’t have that equipment here. She’ll have to go to the Medical Center in Hershey. It has all the machines and specialists she needs.” Lucas leaned in closer. “And I’ve taught seminars there…back before I rejoined the church. They know a lot more about us plain folks than they used to. Eve will be treated with the greatest respect and care.”
“Hershey.” John made a fist and ran it over his mouth.
Isaac waited nervously for his answer—not knowing what John Zook would say. Though Isaac knew what his answer would’ve been. Suddenly, it wasn’t Martha with an injury that he was picturing but Grace. He tried shaking his head to get that thought out of his mind.
“Jah,” John finally said. “We can do that.”
Isaac exhaled in relief. “Want me to pull the buggy around?” he asked, needing to be busy, helpful.
“Aye,” John replied. “We can take her right now.”
“John,” Lucas said. “Hershey is fifty miles away. She needs to go in a car.”
“Oh.” John frowned momentarily, but then said, “Yes, of course. Will you take her?” he asked, grabbing Lucas’s arm.
“I don’t have a driver’s license anymore, but…”
“I’ll take her,” Kevin said. “I’ve got an SUV with a big back seat. She won’t be able to lie down completely, but at least it will be a fast trip.”
“John will be able to go, too, jah?” Isaac asked, jumping in. He would demand it if the man said no.
“Yes,” Kevin said. “As soon as Eve’s ready, I’m going to give her a shot of steroids. It will help with the pain and inflammation, since the drive will still be a bit bumpy. She might need to spend a few days in the hospital. Why don’t you go home and pack
a bag?” he said to John. “I think we’ll be ready to go in about an hour.”
“Danke,” John said. Then, after saying his goodbyes, the doctor walked away.
“Is that all?” Isaac asked, looking at Lucas. “Anything else we need to know?”
“I don’t think so. Kevin already reserved the CT and MRI for testing as soon as she arrives. We’ll know more in a few hours.”
“We should get you home, then,” Isaac said, knowing how anxious John must’ve been, not wanting to waste a minute. “Should I drive?”
“Aye,” John said, looking older somehow, worn out. “Gracie?”
“I’m here,” she said, sliding up to her father.
“I’m going to be gone for a while.”
“I know, Daed.”
“It would worry me less if I knew you were taking care of things at home—at the farm, I mean.”
“Don’t worry, Daed,” she said, putting an arm around him as they walked outside into the afternoon sunshine. “We’ll take care of everything. Won’t we?”
Isaac was surprised to see that the question was aimed at him.
“Isaac and I will keep things going just as normal as can be.” Grace tried to laugh. “Why, the farm will probably run smoother than it ever has…without you around.”
John chuckled. “I’m sure it will. Danke,” he said, reaching for Isaac’s hand, squeezing it so hard, causing a lump to form in Isaac’s throat. “Having you here is such a blessing. Gott must be looking out for us.”
Isaac wasn’t sure what to say, because it wasn’t Gott that had brought him to the Zook farm. It had been John, and though his reasons for that might’ve been off the mark, Isaac was ever so grateful that he was right where he was.
“Danke,” Grace whispered to Isaac as she climbed onto the buggy next to him. “I was just saying that so Daed wouldn’t fret.”
“I’ll do anything you need,” he said, telling the absolute truth.
Chapter Twenty-Three
Grace felt tired all the way to her bones. Everything was a rush, helping Daed pack his bag, gathering items she knew her mother would want with her in the hospital, saying goodbye to both of her parents as they settled into Dr. McBride’s big vehicle.
The Amish Cowboy's Homecoming Page 15
