Azrael comes to stand next to me and takes in the view, “I should have come to you sooner. I regret not being there for you to explain who you are and what it means for you.”
“What? Now, you want to come into my life? And, what? Be my father?” I ask incredulously, peering up to him.
“I would like to guide you with your mission.”
“No.”
“I understand your anger with me. You must realize I did not have a choice in leaving you as an orphan. Your mother would not have been able to protect you from Lucifer, and raising a child alongside death was not appropriate for the warrior you needed to become.”
“I don’t need your excuses.”
Azrael turns to me, “What is it that you think you do need, daughter?”
I spring to my feet and glare at him, “What I need, you can’t give me. What I want is revenge. And what I don’t need or want is your help.” My hands ball into fists at my sides. Azrael stands resolute as he takes in my words. “You knew what was going to happen to Jack! Why else would you have been there? You could have saved him! I watched you heal Eric! You should have been there to save Jack as well!”
“You misunderstand. I was pulled into that dungeon when I sensed my Guides needed help. I had not known the situation. Despite what you may think, I am not omnipotent.”
His words make sense, and it infuriates me that I'm wrong for accusing him. The tension in my body relaxes as my shoulders slump, and I rub my face, “I’m sorry.”
Awkward silence stirs between us. “If you are serious about your pledge to Jack, will you accept my assistance?”
“I never break a promise. Why do you want to help me anyways? Aren’t you supposed to be neutral?”
“I am neutral. The balance between good and evil has been unbalanced for a long time now. I am allowed to help keep that balance, and I am offering my help to you because you are my daughter. I would like to make up for my betrayal in leaving you. Think of it as a belated birthday gift,” he says as the corners of his mouth turn up.
“Wow,” I breathe. “You don’t even know that my birthday isn’t until next Saturday.” I cross my arms and cock my hip out.
“Actually, I thought it best to hide your true identity so you would be safe from powers that wanted to destroy you.” I quirk an eyebrow. “Your birthday was three days ago.”
“That explains why everyone thought that my transformation was happening faster than normal.”
“Yes.”
Absolutely everything about myself I thought I knew, was a lie. And, if he’s going to help me, he'll have to stay away from Solas. “I have one request if you want to help me.”
“What is your request?”
“I want you to stay away from Solas.”
“I can do that. I imagine he will forever carry a hatred for me. He is not the best of companions for you to keep so closely.”
“Look, I don’t know why he hates you, but as far as who I choose to keep as my friends isn't up to you. Despite what you may think of him, I know his heart. He may have done things in the past, but he's changed. I can see it in him. I care a lot about him. He stays.”
“Ok, daughter.”
I roll my eyes. Even though it makes my heart warm when he calls me his daughter, I'm still sore about being abandoned. “How do you plan on helping?”
A full smile graces his face for the first time, and I see our resemblance, “I have my ways.” He pauses. “When I have information, you will feel a burn in your marking. That is how I can call to you. I will wait for you inside the Veil.” I nod my head. “I will leave you to your companions. I imagine you do not need an escort?”
“I’ll be alright.”
“Until we meet again, daughter. Safe travels.” An emptiness falls over my heart as I watch him fly off into the fading sunlight. The loneliness I feel with him leaving me again is familiar and confusing. I'm old enough not to need my father by my side, yet I can’t help the sorrow at his distance.
I snag another cigarette and sit back down on the edge of the cliff in silence as I watch the sun set over Red Meadow. The chill in the air gets colder after the sun disappears. Lights across the town come to life like fireflies in the dark, and for the first time in what feels like months, I sing out into the starry night sky.
Chapter 21
“You have a beautiful voice,” Solas says from behind me.
“Holy shit!” My wings shoot out of my back in surprise as I jump to my feet and find him smiling. His hair's cut short, covered in a gray knit cap, and he's shaved his goatee, making him appear younger and even more attractive. The illumination of the moon makes his ethereal blue eyes shine like diamonds. “You’ve really got a knack for sneaking up on me. You’ve got to quit that,” I laugh as I scold him.
He chuckles under his breath, “I guess I do.”
“Sorry for running out on everybody like that. I just needed to think.”
Solas saunters towards me, his movements relaxed and calculating. “Yeah. We thought so. I started to worry after a few hours. Alice told me where I could find you after she forced me to change my appearance. She didn’t think I would fit in very well at your college,” he rolls his eyes.
“She can be a little demanding when it comes to appearances. I like it. It suits you. It’ll help you blend in on campus,” I tell him with a grin as I blush. I’m grateful for the darkness hiding my embarrassment of complementing him. He joins my side, and we face the majestic view. “Jack and I use to come here,” I add. “I just… I had to get out of there. I guess I just wanted to say goodbye in my own way.”
“You definitely have a way of saying goodbye,” he says referring to my message to Jack.
“I meant it, you know?” I declare as I face him.
“I do.” Solas observes me, “But what you promised… well…”
“Surprised everyone?”
“Well, yes. No one saw your anger coming. It was highly unexpected, but it's an impossible feat.”
“I don’t accept that.” I'll make them all pay.
“I knew you wouldn’t,” he grins. “Do you have a plan?”
“Not really,” I shrug, dejected.
“What about your vision?”
“The one of Lucian?”
“Yes. If you can discern where you are, what you're wearing, or any thoughts, we may be able to take the upper hand. Take first blood instead of waiting for him to strike out.”
“That sounds a lot better than what I had in mind.”
“And what did you have in mind?”
I shrug again, embarrassed to admit the absurdity of my strategy. “Find a way into Sheol. Go in with guns blazin’,” I mumble.
Worry creases his brow, “I know that sounds like a great idea when rage burns fresh inside you, but I know from experience how reckless that plan is.”
“What do you mean?” Solas sighs heavily towards the horizon, folds his large arms over his massive chest, and loses himself in thought. “Solas?”
“Despite what you may assume about me, I have not always been a being of Darkness. There was a time when I was a Warrior of Light, a Cherubim who fought for His glory. I was sent from Paradise to guard over a special person—a young girl. I was never to reveal myself to her as an angel. As you know, I have the ability to shapeshift as well as telepathy. Some angels are blessed with only one ability, some with more, and some without any. I used it to conceal who I really was so I could stay close to her. I couldn’t approach her as you see me now or I would have scared her away,” Solas says with a smile before continuing his story.
“I even changed my name. I befriended her and protected her for years, whether she knew she was in danger or not. I fell in love with her… and she fell in love with me. But it was considered sacrilege, and I was ordered to cease all romantic ties. I broke her heart, but we remained friends.
“Years later, there was an attack, and I was outnumbered by Fallen. I wasn’t fast enough, and they tried to kill her.
When I tried to reach her, the enemy transported me to a desert. I fought to get back, but he pulled me into the Veil. She almost died, but she was strong and unrelenting. She survived. I was full of rage for the beasts that tried to kill the only person I had ever loved. I took out the Fallen who pulled me into the Veil and used him to breech Sheol. I was going to hunt down every last one of them.” Solas shakes his head with disappointment.
“What happened?”
“I came across the Prince and attacked him. Then, I was captured and tortured.”
“You’re here now,” I say more in question than fact.
“Azrael came to me. He said I had defied angelic law by crossing over into Sheol. So, my essence fell. My golden wings turned dark with shame, and I was placed into Beleth’s legion to serve. I was brought back to the surface when he took over the mission to capture you.” He gazes at me sadly.
“What happened to the girl?” I prod and immediately regret it as sorrow enters his eyes.
He fakes a smile as he says, “That's a story for another time.”
“So, your ability to shapeshift… Is this what you really look like? What I see?” I wonder.
“Yes. This is my original form.”
“Can you shapeshift into anything?”
“Anything animate.”
I remember seeing him as the raven he materialized from when I first laid eyes on him and how much he resembled the raven that followed me and Trey as we hiked up the mountain trails before Beleth abducted me the first time. “Were you with Beleth when he tried to capture me on the mountain?”
Solas hangs his head, “Yes.”
“I noticed you following us. I didn’t know it was you at the time.”
Regret passes over his expression. “Yes. I was commanded to scout the area and make sure he could get to you without problems.”
“I know you didn’t have a choice, Solas.” He nods his head in agreement. I'm not ready to go back to Evelyn’s just yet. I want to figure out what I need to do now. “So, what do we do now?”
Solas holds the sides of my arms, “We stay in Red Meadow. You finish out your semester while you work on controlling your visions. When we know we can have the upper hand, we'll plan an attack without having to cross over into Sheol.” Regret, longing, appreciation, love.
“That's a much better plan,” I agree with a twitch of a smile.
Solas embraces me and kisses the top of my head. “We should return and make arrangements for our stay.”
“Yeah,” I sigh. I dread the pity that will come from everyone when we return.
“Together?” Solas reassures me.
“Together.”
When we advance on the property from the dark sky, I discover Alice, Eric, and Evelyn on my balcony. The soft glow of spotlights around the manor illuminate its edifice. We land on the stone terrace between the wall and the table they're sitting at. Retracting our wings, Evelyn rises to approach us. She moves with the grace and elegance of royalty and gleams with radiance as she speaks, “I've spoken to Alice and Eric and invited them to stay at the manor. It's the safest place for you to be now, and they only agree to stay if you will as well. Will you stay at the manor and let us continue to protect you?”
I search the faces of my friends. They're more than that to me now. We've been through a lot together and have supported one another wholly along the way. They're no longer just my friends. They're my family—Alice, Eric, Evelyn, Solas, Cassius, and Beckett. In this moment, I come to the realization that I would do anything to protect each of them myself. “I thought your mission to protect me was over when I fully evolved?”
Eric’s eyes meet mine, and I notice he's no longer wearing the contacts that concealed their color. They're violet. Just as vibrant as Alice’s that reflect in the moonlight over the balcony. Eric sternly informs me, “Your father's requested we remain to assist you on your mission. You're still very new to this world and have a lot to learn. We'll stay with you to guide you on your journey and protect you along the way.”
“As will I,” Evelyn adds.
“What about Solas and the Griffins?” I propose.
Evelyn rubs her forehead as she grumbles, “If they stay, I'll have to keep up with their appetites. They're currently devouring the remaining fare of the kitchen.” She grins at me playfully. “But they may reside here. There's plenty of room, and the more protection you have, the better I'll feel.”
I embrace her with my angelic speed, “Thank you.” My empathic abilities pick up her worry and love for me.
“I'll notify the Griffins of the new arrangements,” Solas addresses as he squeezes my shoulder and leaves through my room. Evelyn releases me and follows Solas downstairs to show them their new accommodations.
“There's one thing that I don’t understand,” I begin as I lean back against the frame of the French doors.
“What’s that?” Alice coxes, joining me in the doorway.
I continue, “I searched Beleth’s dungeons after the battle broke out. The missing angel wasn’t there. I don’t think Beleth ever had him."
Alice shares a look with Eric, “Um…”
I scan them, waiting for a response. Eric rises from the table and joins Alice, grasping her hand as he gives me a forced grin. He runs his fingers through his hair nervously before he speaks, “We asked Azrael if he had any information to help us locate him. He said he found him, and he was never in any danger.”
“So, where is he? Were all my efforts with Trey for nothing? We wouldn’t be in this position if I hadn’t felt I had to push Trey!” I'm furious with perplexity, my hands wildly gesturing my emotions.
Alice clears her throat, signaling that I need to calm down. “We were unaware at the time, but he was…” She squeezes Eric’s hand as she fumbles to find the words, “reassigned.” She appears nervous that I won't like her answer.
“Oh,” I clip. “Well, why weren't you told?”
Eric explains, “Your protection had been planned for years before you moved here. It's always been the plan that we were all to meet you and guide you in your transformation. We just assumed the plan never changed. We never asked until the Fallen started converging on Red Meadow. I guess they never saw it pertinent to tell us either.”
I rub my face with both of my hands and enter the bedroom. “This is ridiculous,” I breathe.
They follow me into the room, and Alice adds with passion, “We're just as pissed off at the situation as you are.”
Biting my lip, I gaze around the room. It feels empty because all of my belongings are still back at The Keep. My only remaining belongings are a bottle of Jäger on the nightstand, my backpack full of books sitting in one of the chairs facing the fireplace, and my guitar within its case propped against the wall, next to the entrance of the closet. Yet, it isn’t the only reason it feel empty. Jack isn’t here. I practice pushing my emotions aside as Solas advised me. “I don’t have any clothes,” I whine.
“I’ll bring you some of mine to hold you over for a few days, and I’m sure you’ve left some at our house as well. We’ll worry about the rest later,” Alice replies.
“Thanks.”
“So, what’s your plan now?” Eric inquires with his arms crossed over his chest.
“Well, I’ve had another vision recently. It’s not quite clear yet. I want to return to R.M.U. to finish out the semester, and in the meantime I need to work on deciphering the vision. Solas believes if I can get enough information from it that it'll give us the upper hand. We can use it to plan an attack on the Fallen. We don’t want to wait around idly for their next move. We want to draw first blood.”
Alice’s eyes widen bit by bit with my words as Eric’s mouth grows into a grin. Alice cautions, “You’ll be starting a war!”
I growl back at her, “They already started it when they took Jack from me! This is my purpose, isn’t it? I’m supposed to be a weapon against the Darkness poisoning the world? I won’t let them take anything else from me!”
I let out a heavy breath and Eric releases me. “His name's Lucian.” I pivot away and begin to pace. “Solas says he's my complete opposite, the Prince of Sheol. In my vision, he has me restrained and is torturing me into releasing my essence to him. Solas said he can’t just take it from me, and I'd have to relinquish it willingly for the Fallen to be able to take control of me and use me as their weapon.”
Alice bursts out laughing, “Lucian? Are you sure?”
I stop in my tracks and scrutinize her, “Yes, what's so funny?” My hands tighten into fists at my sides.
“He’s a tool! There's no way it could be him. Everyone knows what a dimwit he is,” she declares.
“Well, it’s him. If I can just clarify where I am or even how I got there, we can take precautions to turn the tables. Maybe change the outcome.”
“Ok,” she chuckles and shakes her head.
“You don’t believe me? I can prove it. Let me show you,” I suggest, stepping closer to her.
“How can you show me?” she questions with confusion as her laughter quiets.
“I can project memories into your mind if I touch you.”
“Wicked,” Eric chitters with excitement.
“I…I guess,” Alice stutters. “Will it hurt?”
“No,” I answer with a tight smile.
“Ok. Show me,” she says, squaring her shoulders. I reach out with my hands and place my palms on each of her temples. Alice squeezes her eyes shut tight. Her long, black eyelashes strain against each other before I close my eyes to invoke my vision.
A hand grips a fistful of my hair and wrenches my head back to look him in the face. His square jaw is set as he bares his teeth, growling at me on my knees. My hands are bound to my ankles, restraining my wings firm against my back. The slightest twitch causes the binding to cut deeper into my appendages. “You will suffer,” he snarls with a vibration in his chest, reminding me of a rattlesnake. Raising his free hand, he backhands me across the face, and my head snaps to the side as the taste of salted copper fills my mouth. “No one's coming to save you,” his voice rumbles and hums in my ears as his flaming red eyes scowl at my weakness. He produces a blade and depresses its sharp point into my chest. The tip slowly digs into my flesh as he twists it deeper. I want to wince from the pain, but I've learned to conceal my vulnerability. He jerks my head back and releases my hair to clutch my chin. “Relinquish your essence to me,” he demands.
MIDNIGHT DIVINE (The Helio Trilogy Book 1) Page 27
