Maybe I’m being dramatic and it’s the friendly neighbourhood spider man who has come to take pity on my sore feet.
My own joke had me snorting out loud when the man dropped me on the ground…….. or boat?
Stumbling round I feel backwards against something cold but warm hands help steady me. My hands tightened on the bar behind me keeping a strong grip. No doubt they were turning red from how hard I was holding on.
I could feel his hot breath on my face as he leaned down towards me. My mind screamed to hit him and run while my body refused to cooperate. I was losing the mental fight when I felt warm gently hands push my hair out of my face. But still I couldn’t open my eyes, the confidence I had been feeling the last few weeks had run away. Where even my inner bad chick had disappeared into the darkest corners of my mind. Peaking out as she watched the events unfold before telling me I was on my own.
“Don’t fear me, for I have already told you once. I will never hurt you” A voice said. One that had me snapping my eyes open. It was him!
“You-“ I didn’t get a chance to finish as every memory he had stolen from me had come back. Bombarding my mind with image after image of every time we had meet. From the encounter in my home where another person had invaded my mind. To him saving me from the bears, but more worrying than that was a memory of us on a date. One I didn’t even remember!
But like a black and white movie I watched it play out, watching as he had entered my room from the window while I was asleep.
Was I seeing this from his point of view or from a third person perspective?
I watched as he soundlessly walked towards me as I laid unaware, lost to a dream. He had come into my room at the crack of midnight where he gently woke me up. I watched as my face turned from sleepy to shock and finally happiness.
It hurt to think I was missing out on these memories, these experiences.
I watched as my past self-took his hand without hesitation as he wanted me to explore the night with him. Dressed in dark coloured jeans and a plain black shirt where he had rolled up the sleeves. Not that it mattered as his demonic skin kept his human form hidden from me. But watching from this perspective I could make out the golden veins that ran through his whole body. Trusting in his words that he would never harm. His eyes forever burned like the sun, how they looked at me in such wonder.
It hurt that I didn’t even know about this, I wanted to remember that night. He had been visiting my dreams for as long as I could remember and yet I through he never existed.
How wrong I was.
I watched in raptured attention as the night played out, flying through the night with my head thrown back. I was smiling, it was almost like I was reliving the night once more. However, it was short lived as the memory started to speed up like someone had hit the fast forward button. Watching as my previous self-enjoyed the night basking in his warmth where he flew us both to a roof top. One that looked like it belonged to another world where plants of all sizes, shapes and colours.
But what had hurt me the most was seeing how he had planned this secrete date. One where a blanket and food was placed down for us to enjoy. Laughing and joking around before we were both looking up into the night, pointing out the stars. I couldn’t hear anything that was being said as I was left to watch, but I could feel the echo of emotions. The happiness at finally remembering him once more, spending the night with him.
He had stolen them from me!
I felt like I had a spilt personality as half of me was aware of what was going on. Knowing I could trust this beast and how it felt when he holds me. Whereas the other half of me was unsure and afraid of who this beast was. It felt like the first time I had meet him but seeing the memory I knew that wasn’t the truth.
Everything else had faded away the moment I knew he was the one responsible for my recent gaps.
“You stole my memories”
Chapter Thirteen
Broken Truth
“You stole my memories” I said in an accusing voice. One where my voice had broken on the last word.
A war was raging on the inside as I looked into his golden eyes as they darkened. He could already see how much he had hurt me by taking them away. It was nothing like the pain and betrayal I felt.
I had trusted him every time like a naive little girl, one I swore I never wanted to be again. But that trust had been broken by him. One done by his current actions that had led to the way I flinched as he tried to touch me.
“NO! you don’t get to touch me again!” He tilted his head as he took in my wild eyes.
“You are mine whether you like it or not. Therefor it is my right to touch you as I please” He said leaning into me with too much confidence.
“That does not belong to you! This is my body only I get a say with who I allow to touch me. And that is not you!” I shouted at him trying to sound strong and confident.
“You lost that right long ago when you gave yourself to me” He said looking down at me with an overconfident smile
I was at a loss for words as he knew who I was before. Which begs the question. Why has he never told me? Why keep it hidden from me?
“Why?!” I pleaded to him. What my plead meant I have no idea. It could mean anything, why hide the truth from me? Why take away my memories? Why won’t he let me remember him?
My eyes locked on his with unshed tears with too much emotion in them as he gazed into them. Could he see my pain I felt from his actions? I watched as his golden eyes started to turn black, shutting me out. Could he see how I wore my heart on my sleeve? I watched as his eyes became colder.
“You are not ready for the truth; you don’t know nothing about who you once were!” He snapped at me with a bite to his words. One that had me wanting to get away.
He was no longer my once calm and gently beast. No. Instead he looked like something that had clawed its way from hell. He wore a long black jacket that kept his body hidden from view which only made his appearance darker and more vicious. His once beautiful golden horns began to peel away, changing colour to pitch black. Twisting around they started to more, vibrating in length as another two horns began to push through his head.
It was the first time I had begun to fear what he could do to me. The first time I no longer saw him as my saviour but instead as the beast he truly is.
One I don’t know why I was poking. “And whose fault is that” I shouted at him as I pushed him away from me. I needed space between us even as I knew my action would cause him to lash out.
But he shocked me once more as he never raised a hand, nor did he do anything. Instead he let me push him away, but I don’t know if that hurt me more.
“This is your own fault women!” he shouted back at me where his voice dropped deeper then possible. Almost like he no longer had any humanity.
“Oh really. Blame the forgetful one who doesn’t have a clue about the past or what actions had brough me here!”
“If you really knew what happened then you would have repeated history once more” His voice thundered out causing the boat we were on to violently rock.
I had almost lost my footing before regaining it as I started to back away from him. His hands where clenched in a tight fist, breathing rapidly.
“DO you really think I would have wasted all my time in finding you just to watch as you run? To watch once more as you left me behind” He snarls in my direction.
“You don’t know that! But that’s beside the point here! You could have let me keep the memories; you could have told me about my past! What did you do to me to make you so afraid to tell me the fucking truth?!”
I was furious at him but at the same time there was a nagging feeling, warning me not to push him too far. One I ignored as my blood was boiling.
“YOU! It is what you did! What you had done before taking-“ He stopped before revealing an important piece of information as he had spun around and put his fist threw a glass window sending shards flying. While splitting the outside wal
l where cracks had run down and onto the deck.
I was grateful to be on a large party boat which is used for large groups of people as it allowed for some much-needed space between us. I watched as he stayed like that for a few minutes where he was breathing hard. His shoulders rose up and down in rapid movements as he tried to calm himself.
I wanted to go over there and smooth his anger, but I didn’t. whatever I did in the past, I wasn’t the same person. Why couldn’t he understand that?! I just wanted to know who I was. It won’t change anything!
The past is the past. One I need in order to move on. Why can’t he see this? I felt like I was having a mental breaking down! One that might require me to end up in a white jacket and sent to the mental institution.
“You don’t know me Beast…… Just as I don’t know you” It was shameful to admit how much I wanted him and needed him. Feelings that were foreign to me just like the beast before me. To think I had through I knew him with every encounter I had within my dreams and apparently real life. But it was nothing but a sham.
“That is where your wrong Belle” The way he rolled my name sent shivers don’t my back as I kept creeping away. “For I know each and every curve on that body. I have run my hands across your pale skin” his words were more than I could handle. I needed to get away.
“If you know me so well. Then why hide?” I bite out at him with my own growl. Which I admit was pathetic.
“By the Gods WOMEN! You are pushing me” He warns.
“You stole my memories of every encounter we had; you know more about me then I do as you claim. So, tell me WHY?! Why not tell me, why not show me who you truly are?” I started to forget the main reason I was angry as I could feel a calming sensation wrap itself around me.
“One day Belle you will know who I am, know why I have done what I have done. But you are not yet ready as our enemies move in closer to us. There are those who are waiting for you to remember before claiming a debt they believe you owe them” He warns me. Maybe the person who was following me was one of these enemies as it clearly wasn’t Beast.
“And when is that supposed to be?! Another five years or so” I said with as much sarcasm as I could.
“If that’s how long it takes to be the women you once were, the women I once loved” I felt like he had dropped ice over me. As the freezing cold water woke me up from whatever trance he had put me in. He said he loved the old me. But not the new me. Did he not see that I was both sides of the same coin. The past, the present and the future are all me just in different aspects.
I once though our story would be like Beauty and the Beast were our story would be told through the ages. How wrong was I? Like a dark twist to my once favourite movie. I had lost my mind.
“Really?! REALLY!” I screamed in a high-pitched voice, one that had him wincing. “I will never, I mean NEVER! Be whoever I was before!” No matter what he thinks there is no changing who I am now. This is me! If he doesn’t like it and can not accept it, then it’s time to move on. We may not be lovers. Hell, we may not even be friends. But its time to let this unhealthy relationship go. It toxic and borderline obsessive.
“It is only a matter of time before you turn back to who you once were” He purrs as he stalks towards me.
“You know what Beast” I pause as he takes in the defeated tone in my voice. “Keep my fucking memories. Keep the fucking truth from me. But mark my words, I will one day find out. And when I do, I never. Ever want to see you”
I was done. No fucking more will I believe in fairy tales and happy endings.
“If you run then I will chase you down. And when I do. I will keep you chained to my bed, hidden within my castle” I didn’t see him move. Once second, he was on the other side and the next, he was standing in front me, caging me against the railing.
“Say all you want. Threaten me all you like. But you will never have me in this life or the next, that I promise you” something unspoken flashed in his eyes, too quick for me to decipher.
“Looks like I’m already running out of time” He muttered to himself unaware I had caught his every word.
Like a story coming to an end I could feel the temperature drop down as a cold chill wrecked my body. As I wasn’t dressed in the warmest cloths. The wind howled around us, keeping us trapped in this battle between opposite sides. Him standing there with the secretes of the world while I stumbled to learn them.
For he would not give them to me, that much I knew. Just as I knew the moment, he was about to steal this memory. But this time I won’t let him. For I was done letting someone else dictate my life. Controlling it for their own benefit. To mould me as they see fit.
“All this time I had been searching for answers, trying to find out what happened. You had known and kept it from me. All because you think I’m not ready!” I let the tears roll down my cheek as I carried on. “Your wrong Beast. For you have already ran out of time” I whisper up to him.
Before he had a chance to react, I had kneed him in the balls and pushed him away with all of my strength. Taking this as my opportunity I had legged it away. Plain and simple I had run as fast as my legs could go. Running towards the end of the boat. I could hear his roar of anger. But I didn’t care.
This was me taking back control I should never have given. Climbing upon the rails the waves became more violent as it sensed what I was about to do. Everyone knew that if someone jumped into its depth. Then It would drag that poor soul down towards there watery grave.
But I didn’t plan on dying tonight, I planned to survive. To escape him as I had a secret. One even he didn’t know about. As he rounded the corner I was balancing on the railings as the boat rocked from side to side.
Like the heavens knew what was happening they opened up and wept from how this night will end. He grounded to a halt as he took in my position.
“BELLE, I beg you don’t” He shouted in panic.
“What’s a matter Beast? Are you scared for me? or are you scared because I will remember this night and everything you said?” I roar out.
“Let us talk about this! Don’t be foolish women! Do you not know of the creatures below?!” He knew he couldn’t move as a single step could rock the boat and make me fall in.
“Don’t ever come for me again beast” If he could give me his word maybe I wouldn’t swim with the monsters.
“I can’t promise that, but I won’t allow you to do this. I won’t allow- “
He stopped speaking as he watched as I smiled at him, one that meant goodbye. His face was riddled with fear as I made up my mind for good. He couldn’t promise to leave me alone which only left me with this choice.
I saw the moment he realised I was about to jump and take my chances with the monsters of the water. It was better than staying up here with him as I knew the moment, he had me. He would take this night away.
Beast ran at me in a blur, but it was too late as the waves crashed overboard. Spreading my arms wide, I closed my eyes as I fell backwards. Letting the waves pull me down into the water. He tried in vain to grab me, to stop me from hitting the water. But he failed.
I fell into the water headfirst as I kept my eyes closed before smiling. It was my temporary escape as I looked up and saw him drive into the water. I must have done something right as the water became my own shield.
It was like the water was alive as every time he tried to break the surface to get to me. It had spat him out like rotten food. I watched as he kept trying like a broken recorded that would never be the same.
Thunder and lightning lit up the river highlighting the creatures that swam towards me. Monstrous creatures that was half humanoid and half sea. I let the world above darken with how deep I let myself fall.
For not even the Beast could reach me now.
Chapter Fourteen
Swimming With Ariel
Below the surface of the water are creatures the dwell in their depths. Ones that don’t take kindly to any beings that live on the land coming into th
eir home. For the sea was there home, one where they would drown anyone foolish enough to enter their home. No one ever lives to tale the tale of creatures they encounter.
None were foolish enough to enter their home. Except for me. For I knew they wouldn’t harm me, nor did I fear them as I had meet many of the creatures here. We were cut from the same cloth except I could live on the land as well as under the water. That was my secrete and mine alone to keep
It all started back four years ago when I was walking along the River Thames. I wasn’t paying attention to my feet as I tripped over a broken slab and fell into the water. At first, I was afraid as I couldn’t swim let alone hold my breath very long. I started to panic as I was like a baby in the water who had no idea how to get out. I was petrified with how I started to sink lower, I was lucky that there were no creatures near me as I believed none had lived in the water. But that soon changed as I saw something dark approaching. At first, I saw the lights that was blink like stars to guild sailors’ home. That was my first through before it showed me what it was.
Lost Girl (Soul Bound Book 1) Page 13
