* * *
After they had bathed and changed they relaxed in her study, and Aleria’s euphoria faded. She strolled around the warmly lit room, waving an arm to include the comfortable lounge chairs trimmed in dark teak, the matching bookcases and the numerous souvenirs of her travels and accomplishments.
“You know, Mito, in one way you are very lucky.”
“I am?”
“You’re the only girl in our whole class who has a real purpose in life, a real problem to solve.”
“It that’s the case, I could wish I wasn’t so lucky.”
“No, no, you don’t understand. When I take on a challenge, when I try something and then I succeed, I almost always look back on it and say to myself, ‘Well, that wasn’t so hard. What was the big whoop-de-do about that?’ And it takes all the fun out of the success.” She swept her hand around at the trophies and mementos again.
“So the girl who has everything wants more.”
A pang of sorrow shot through Aleria and she stopped, her arm dropping.
Mito sprang to her feet, her hand outstretched. “That was so unfair of me, Aleria. I do understand.”
Aleria shook her head, and went over and sat on her swivel chair, elbows propped on her desk, staring at the garden outside the bay window. Drooping lace curtains, bright crystal vase of cut flowers languishing on the varnished oak sill. So beautiful. So…empty. “That’s what makes it even worse. Who am I to complain? I know that it isn’t fair for me to feel that way, considering all the other people and all the problems they have.” She turned to her friend again. “But I do feel that way. No problems, no challenges, no way to prove myself. You know what my parents want? ‘A young woman ready to take her place in society.’ And why shouldn’t they? They haven’t done anything wrong. They love me and give me everything I need and more, and I repay them with stunts and ungraciousness.
“Not you, Mito. You had a problem from the start. You had to fight for everything and you succeeded. You must be so proud of yourself.”
Mito shrugged. “I wish I could call what I’ve accomplished a success. Certainly, I’ve completed the curriculum despite what some people expected and wanted. But what now? This Cumulato is a two-edged sword for me as well, you know. I don’t know what I’m going to do next, either.”
Aleria felt a rush of love for her friend: so different, yet so much in tune with her thoughts and emotions.
“All right, you’ve persuaded me. I’ll get Father to let you come by after the Gala. But only if you go to the party for a while first. Hana and Gita can come, too, if they want.”
“How do you know your father will let them?”
She smiled and flipped her hair back. “He will, if that’s what I want. Father and I have that kind of a relationship.”
“I don’t know if I’d like that.”
“Why not?”
“He’s your father, and you’re supposed to have some respect for him. How can you have respect for a parent who does anything you want?”
Aleria was silent for a while. Finally she nodded. “I see what you mean. I’m sure I have respect for Father. I must. I love him dearly. Now that I think about it, he doesn’t do absolutely anything I want. He gives me what I ask, as long as I don’t ask for the wrong things. Sometimes I push a bit, just to see what I can get. You know, if I do get what I ask for, I always feel a little disappointed, like I’m missing something. Maybe that’s what it is.”
She dropped the thoughtful look. “But not this time. I’m quite pleased with the whole thing. I’ll spend most of the next two weeks at home, and guess where I’ll lounge around? In Father’s office, where I love to be. He’ll give me some of the payroll estimates to calculate, we’ll talk about new accounting methods, and we’ll both have a lovely time. So it was definitely worth it.”
She grinned over at Mito. “It was worth it just to see the look on Praetor Marmen’s face when he discovered the statues. Oh, was he horrified!”
“Do you think you should have been there when they discovered it? Wasn’t that risky? Someone might put two and two together.”
“We had to be there. There was such a hubbub, half the city showed up. We stayed out of the front row. No one even noticed us. I just wish I were a mouse in the corner when they hear about it all being a hoax. I would like to see his face then!”
There was a long silence, and Aleria looked over to see Mito’s face working. “What’s wrong, Mito?”
“Well, I…”
“Come on, you can tell me. What’s bothering you?”
“Well, I don’t want to seem jealous or anything, but why didn’t you ask me to join in?”
“I thought about it, but you wouldn’t have gone.”
“How do you know?”
Aleria just waited.
“All right, I wouldn’t have. It would have been nice to be asked.”
“Mito, you wouldn’t have gone, and even knowing about it might have been a problem. Even if you would have done it, you shouldn’t have. It would be too much of a risk for you.”
“What do you mean for me? Why me more than anyone else? Am I that inept?”
Aleria put her arm around her friend’s shoulders. “Of course you aren’t inept. Whatever gave you that idea? No, I didn’t dare bring you in because if anything went wrong I would never forgive myself. Now, don’t get your feelings hurt. You know you can’t afford to get into trouble. If I get into a mess, my father has the money and the influence to get me out. You don’t have that luxury.” She had always spoken casually about her friend’s hardships, because she felt it made them less important, made the differences between them smaller.
Mito was silent for a moment. Then she sighed. “I suppose you’re right, as usual.”
Aleria slapped her shoulder. “Don’t let it bother you. Think of how much strength of character you’re building with all these tribulations.”
“Strength of character?”
“My father’s very words. You know why he was upset about letting me off? Now, try to understand this. He said that it would help my strength of character to accept responsibility for my actions. He thought this would have been good for me, but he couldn’t let it happen because of political considerations. So, for the good of the family, I was going to have to miss out on a valuable learning experience. Can you figure that?”
“I suppose, since you explain it so clearly.”
She glanced over, relieved to see an impish grin on Mito’s face. “Good for you. I didn’t try to follow too closely. I was just pleased that he was letting me off.”
Mito shook her head. “So even the chance for a lecture was missed. Your poor father.”
“Whose side are you on?”
“You don’t need any help, I don’t think.”
5. Challenge
Aleria’s equipment bag hit the tiles of the change room floor with a clatter. “Gita, you have told me seven times this week about the Samnian silk you ordered for your Spring Ball gown.” She shook out her barehand tunic. “From your description, that cloth is so beautiful, you could make a fighting smock out of it and wear it to the Ball. Couldn’t you just let it rest for a while?” The moment she said it, the crestfallen look on the other girl’s face made her wish she could take it back. But really!
“What’s wrong with you, Aleria?” Twin sprang to Twin’s defence as usual. “You haven’t said a word for hours, and now you get insulting. Are your monthlies on the way?”
“I am not having my monthlies, Hana. There is nothing wrong with me except that I am tired of all this gabble. Gowns and teas, boys and parties, it’s all just so boring.” She tossed her dress over the peg in her usual cubicle, the one nearest the door. “If half of our outings came out a quarter as interesting as our chatter ahead of time pretends they are going to be, our parents would lock us up in our rooms until our hair turned grey. But they don’t. They turn out to be the same old boring parties, with the same old boring boys, and the same old borin
g jokes being told, and not one of us with the gumption to get out and do something truly interesting.”
Hana’s nose came up. “And what do you consider ‘interesting’, since we’re all so dull?”
“I don’t know. Anything that doesn’t involve the dubious thrill of dancing around the rules of etiquette, pretending we’re going to do what everyone knows that nobody has the nerve to try.”
Her friend pulled on her padded leggings and tied the laces more firmly than usual. “I suppose you think these personal defence lessons are boring as well.”
“Not at first. They were quite a lot of fun at the beginning. But now I realize that when we get out on the floor, I am going to be able to beat Mito, and you can beat me, and any of the boys could flatten any of us any time they wanted, but they don’t, because they have to follow the rules of the combat. If one of those mercenaries we met in the street yesterday tried to grab me, or hit me or something worse, I wouldn’t have a chance of fighting back, and we all know it. Those are tough men, and the world out there is full of people like that, and some of them are not polite.”
“I thought he handled it very well, when you ran into him at full speed. He was very polite.”
Aleria hesitated, sorry she had brought up the topic of soldiers. “I had no idea there would be a whole line of them right around that corner.” She rubbed a bruised rib. “He certainly was well armed. I think I caught his sword hilt or something even harder.”
Hana giggled. “If he had known you were coming, it might have been something else you ran into. You should have seen the look on his face when he reached down to pick you up, and realized what he was holding.”
Aleria shook her head in disgust, her face heating. “There you go again with your silly jokes. He just helped me up, that’s all. It was polite.”
The other girls let loose a peal of laughter. “And when he realized that you were only wearing a light summer dress with very little underneath it, he dropped you so fast you almost fell down again. I never saw a man look so embarrassed.”
“He was frightened, I think.”
Heads turned to Gita in surprise. She was the quieter of the two sisters, but Aleria often found her ideas worth listening to.
“Frightened?” Aleria flopped down on the bench and began to lace her leggings.
“Yes, I think so. Hana and Mito were busy laughing at you, but I noticed his face. He looked straight at his sergeant, sort of putting his hands behind his back like a boy caught stealing a cookie. I think he was afraid of causing trouble.”
Aleria took a final tug on the laces, then nodded. “You’re probably right. Those mercenaries may be necessary because of the revolt in Shaeldit, but they aren’t exactly popular locally. I imagine they have strict orders not to cause any trouble.” After a subtle pause she sighed. “Too bad.”
“Aleria! Whatever do you mean?”
Mito’s eyes were wide, but Aleria wondered if her friend was that shocked or just putting on the expected act. “I mean that the boys we go to school with have no idea what life is all about. Those mercenaries are men, experienced men. If you met one of those soldiers on a secluded forest trail, he might do more than kiss your ear and grope at your shoulder, like Knaren did to Hana the other night after the party.”
Hana giggled, but Gita looked more serious. “Yes, if you met one of those ruffians alone, he might just do whatever he wanted, and leave you with a little memento for the rest of your life.”
“Nonsense! There are ways of taking care of that as well. Not that I’m likely to need them, if things go the way they have been.” The bitterness in her voice was only partly feigned.
Mito’s face became serious. “You don’t have something planned, do you?”
“Don’t worry. I’m not the kind to do something stupid.”
“Not the kind to do something stupid!” The other three burst into laughter again. “After all the stunts you have pulled this year?”
They bundled out onto the practice floor with the rest of the girls and continued their chatter as they warmed up. Master Ogima was not on the floor yet, leading Aleria to conclude that he was spending only the bare minimum of time with them, probably because the whole thing was worthless.
Aleria dropped to the mat and started her exercises. She was rather proud of the fact that she could do pushups and speak at the same time. “What’s the point? You lot spend much more time worrying about the Arrival Reception than you do on whether you’re going to have any trouble completing your Quest.
“Why worry? Everyone always makes it.”
“Then it’s not much of a test, is it? It isn’t any accomplishment to do something that everyone always succeeds at.”
“You just want to make things difficult. That’s easy for you. You’d make it anyway.”
“Yes, Aleria,” Mito was smiling, but there was a serious note in her voice, “what about the rest of us, the normal ones?”
Aleria’s retort was cut off by the arrival of Master Ogima, who started with his usual remarks about them exercising their jaws too much and ignoring the rest of their muscles. She half listened, more concerned with what the other girl had just said. ‘Am I that much different from the rest? I always knew I was a leader, but not different. Not that different.’ Her preoccupation kept her from making the best use of her practice time, and even the Battle Arts Master, whom she knew enjoyed working with her, asked her if she were in love or something worse.
In the changing room after practice she listened more than usual to the conversation of the other girls. As she came out of the shower they were going on about virginity. After a moment, she had to speak out.
“The reason you aren’t having any success, girls, is that you’re not really trying.”
“What?” They all turned on her, not quite the effect she wanted.
“Considering the number of men out there, and their general attitude towards sex, it would seem that any girl who seriously wanted to lose her virginity could manage it pretty easily. Especially anyone as pretty as you, Plendinta.”
The other girl’s frown showed she was unsure whether to accept the compliment or reject the challenge, as Aleria had intended. “Thank you, Aleria, but I don’t see it that way. Sure, you listen to the boys talking, especially when they think we aren’t listening, and you’d think they would accommodate a girl at the drop of a shoulder strap. Not a chance.”
“You mean, not a chance under your terms. You don’t just want sex. You want romance, with the right person. That’s why you haven’t succeeded.”
The Plendinta’s head came up. “Who are you to be telling me what’s going on in my mind?”
Aleria laughed. “All right. I apologize. I was just telling you what I want. I thought that was pretty normal. Sorry if I’m not normal.”
That got a chuckle from all of them.
“You’re saying that if you wanted to lose your virginity, you could do it, no problem.”
Aleria regarded the other girl. Was there a setup here? Didn’t look like it. “Probably. But I don’t want to. Not just like that, for no reason.”
“That’s right. You want romance, the right man, the right place.”
“Is there something wrong with that?”
“Not at all.”
Aleria took a good look at the other girl’s eyes. “But…you still don’t agree. I can hear it in your voice.”
“I just think it’s kind of unfair, you telling us how easy it is, then making all sorts of reasons why you can’t do it yourself.”
Aleria laughed. “Nice try, Plendinta. You know I said nothing of the sort. I certainly didn’t say I couldn’t do it myself.”
“So you think you could, and under your conditions.”
“Sure. Take a boy like Kalmein anWoling, for example. Take a time like after the Spring Ball. And a place like the Sailor’s Delight. Those would be conditions I could handle. Especially after a few glasses of the new spring wine.”
Se
veral girls sighed. Kalmein was the acknowledged heartthrob of their year, much in demand socially, even by girls two or three classes ahead. Aleria knew she had an advantage because he had always shown a preference for her, although she had never acted on the possibility.
“It’s a bet, then. None of us will say anything, of course. You have free rein. If you can get him to the Sailor's Delight after the Ball, and if you can get him into one of those cozy little alcoves and use it for what it’s there for, then you win. If not, then…”
“Then I lose, in several ways. Good enough!”
The other girls left at this point and Aleria, who had been too busy talking to change into her street clothes, sorted her equipment while Mito waited.
“You don’t have to prove anything, you know.”
“It looks like I do.”
“That’s not what I mean. I saw how you butted into their conversation. You usually ignore that sort of foolishness. It didn’t matter what they were talking about. Whatever it was, you had to jump in with both feet.”
“But you’re the one who said I was different.”
“You’re not proving that you’re one of them, you’re just proving again that you’re better than everyone.”
“I suppose it could be interpreted that way.”
“Can you think of another interpretation for someone who always has to go one step farther, make one move grander than anyone else?”
“Am I really that bad?”
“Who said anything about good or bad? That’s just you. I don’t hear anyone complaining about it. Most of us accept you that way.” She grinned. “We’ve had enough years to get used to it.”
She received a clout on the shoulder for her pains. “You know, for a while there, I thought you were going to be nice. Why’d you have to go and spoil it?”
Mito shrugged. “Wouldn’t want you to think you could get away with being you, without at least a token resistance from someone.”
“Ah, I give up.”
“I doubt it.”
Aleria smiled at her friend. “I suppose not. Giving up isn’t in me.” She sighed, staring off down the street to where the vista of the western hills rose in gradual waves towards the mountains, unseen in the distance. Wild and free, with no restrictions, no pressures to be anybody you aren’t. “But don’t you wish sometimes, you could just let down and relax?”
“I can. Any time. You can’t. You’d get bored and start some kind of foofaraw to liven your life up.”
“I suppose you’re right.”
“Oh, I am. I most definitely am. And I’m going to be very interested to see how you manage to liven it up in this instance.”
“At least I have guaranteed company at the Spring Ball.”
“That’s for sure. Although Kalmein might wonder why he’s suddenly so unpopular with the other girls.”
“I’ll make it up to him!” She had a sudden thought. “Mito, did she set me up?”
Mito glanced at Aleria’s face and sobered. “I think if there was any setting up, you did it yourself. You don’t have to do this, you know. Not if you don’t want to.” She paused. “Do you want to?”
Aleria shrugged. “I don’t know. It sounds like a lot of fun. And I do like a challenge.”
“Is it the kind of thing you should be doing on a dare? How do you think Kalmein is going to feel?”
She wiggled her eyebrows. “Oh, I think he’ll feel just fine.”
But her friend’s face remained adamant.
“All right. I’ll think about it. Honestly, I will. I won’t do it if I think I’ll be hurting anyone. All right?”
Mito shrugged. “It’s not for me to say.”
“Fine.”
Mito stopped. “Does this mean you don’t want me to stay overnight afterwards, then?”
“It means nothing of the sort. It’s not going to change anything.”
“That’s fine, then.”
As they walked on, Aleria reviewed the conversation. Why do I want to do this? At the moment, there didn’t seem to be an easy answer.
6. Disaster
Her father looked up from his reading as she passed through the family lounge. “So, my dear. Which lucky young man is going to receive your attentions at the Ball tonight?”
Aleria winced inside. “Who says any specific young man is going to be that lucky?”
He smiled. “I say so. If I hadn’t already known how important it was to have some designated swain at the Spring Ball, I would be enlightened by this time. It has been the subject of conversation in this household for two months.”
“It has not!”
“Not when I could avoid it, it hasn’t. So who is it going to be?”
“Kalmein anWoling.”
“Hmm.”
“Father!”
“What, dear?”
“That was hardly an enthusiastic response.”
“You make your own social arrangements, my dear. I don’t interfere, I don’t expect to have any influence, and I don’t expect to be asked for approval.”
“Oh, Father. I know you don’t think much of his family. But he’s not that bad.”
“Not that bad? Not an impassioned defence of your chosen one.”
“Father!” She spun around and glared at him. “I’m not mating for life, here.”
“I am glad to hear that.”
She sat beside him on the sofa, frowning. “Look. This is an important social occasion, whether it means anything to you or not. Kalmein is very popular, and it will add to my status to be seen with him. He is also a rather nice, if not too intelligent, young man.”
“If that’s all it is, I suppose I don’t mind too much.”
She stood and curtsied, hiding her flush of guilt. “Thank you, Honoured Father. I am so glad you deign to approve my choice.”
He smiled. “Don’t be a ninny, Aleria. You know I trust you not to do anything stupid. Go ahead and have a good time with your friends.”
“Thank you, Father. I promise not to do anything stupid.”
When she thought back on it later, that conversation was what spoiled everything. Up until then, she had no doubt she was going to go through with it, and was looking forward to it with great anticipation. But a tiny seed of doubt had been planted.
Still, the Ball was a great success. The huge arc of coloured lanterns over the door was a new and very impressive addition to the usual decorations. Aleria noted that the bright lights looked suspiciously Mechanical, but set the thought aside for a more appropriate time. The chandeliers sparkled, the mirrors echoed multiple reflections of swirling lace, and the men provided an upright contrast in their uniforms and formal tabards.
Aleria knew she was not the most beautiful girl there, nor was hers the most expensive or daring dress by far, although the red velvet did bring up some auburn highlights that didn’t usually show in her hair. Instead of the daring scoop to the neckline that some of the girls affected, she had gone for one bare shoulder and arm, set off engagingly – at least she thought so - by the single rose at her wrist. And no beautiful girls were matched with the fantastic gowns, so she turned as many heads as anyone. Her three friends enjoyed themselves in their own styles. The Twins, as usual, had no interest in any individual, but were surrounded by their choice of young men. Aleria thought privately that Hana had rather overdone the black-and-white checks, but they certainly drew the eye to her statuesque figure. She had to admit that Gita’s subdued, tight-fitting blue silk suited her slim form perfectly.
At one point in the evening, she looked around to see how Mito was doing. The girl sat off to one side, her long, dark hair drifting over her left shoulder and her soft eyes sparkling in the coloured lights. Her dress, though one of the more modest by far, had an embroidered bodice that was the envy of the more affluent girls. Only Aleria knew that Mito had done the work herself. With a start, Aleria realized that, by some standards, her friend was the most beautiful woman in the room. Not pretty. Not bold or stunn
ing. But there was something about her…
The young man speaking to her certainly appreciated it, by the tilt of his head and the lean of his body. Then Aleria’s attention was attracted elsewhere, and when she looked again some time later, Mito was alone.
Aleria raised her glass in a silent toast. Mito smiled dreamily and returned the gesture.
“How are you doing? As if I need to ask. Was that Trien who was mooning over you?”
“Don’t be silly, Aleria. He’s a good friend. I like to dance with him.”
Aleria regarded Mito with her head to one side.
“He is! He understands!”
“I watched him, and he is definitely more than friendly. Are you sure how you feel? You’re fooling somebody. I hope it isn’t yourself.”
The dark head tilted up a fraction. “We have had our dance, and he won’t be back for the rest of the evening. Just you watch.”
Aleria grinned. “Oh, well, I suppose you’ll survive. In fact, I believe I see someone else glancing your way. A friendly and understanding sort of glance. ”
Another young man approached, this one in officer’s uniform, and Mito was swept into the dance again.
Aleria noted with satisfaction that their table was the centre of a constant eddy of the best and brightest of their class. As the evening wore on, she spent more and more time with Kalmein, finally turning down any others who wished to dance with her. It was the first time she had ever really tried to be charming, at least in such a formal context. Considering her boasting, she shouldn’t have been surprised at how effective she was, but it seemed very easy, even so.
She had always flirted with Kalmein in a friendly way, and it was simple just to push it a touch farther, to allow him a bit closer each time, when before she had held him off. In response, he was becoming more attentive, ignoring the others in their party, sitting closer to her so that their thighs always touched. His arm was thrown across the chair behind her, and by leaning back she could brush her bare shoulder against his fingers at any time.
Usually the first to note the subtle changes in the crowd, she was so wrapped up in her little game that it took her a while to realize that the Ball was starting to settle. Immediately she straightened and looked around. Yes, the signs were all there.
“Time to move on, Graduates!” She clapped her hands and dragged Kalmein to his feet, managing to swing herself into the circle of his arm as she did so. “The Sailor's Delight awaits, my friends.”
There was a chorus of assent and they swept from the room, conscious that their departure would signal that the Ball was as good as over.
The Sailor's Delight was a traditional spot for after-hours parties. It was just a local drinking establishment, near enough to the docks to carry a certain thrill but far enough away that few real bargemen or raftsmen ever entered. It had several “deluxe” rooms, all satin furnishings and faded gilt trim, which could be rented, with lavish and unobtrusive catering. No one ever mentioned the secluded alcoves that led off the party rooms, and couples who disappeared behind the curtains were studiously ignored.
Aleria, at the head of the group, surveyed the premises and gave her opinion, as if it made any difference. “Very nice, young man. It will suit us quite well, I think.” She swept her shawl over the arm of the attendant and made a slow circuit of the room, choosing the most comfortable and central seat. It was a low divan, long and softly upholstered, and she semi-reclined against the arm in a classic pose. Patting the seat beside her, she glanced up at her escort and smiled, ever so slightly.
He grinned and sat at the other end, leaning against the arm. “Lots of room on this one!”
Slipping off her dancing pumps, she slowly stretched her legs, one at a time. She laid her feet, not too high, not too low, in his lap. “My feet are sore, darling. Rub them, please.”
His strong hands began to massage her toes, more a caress than a rub.
“Oh, that feels so nice.” She slid her free foot a bit higher up his leg, wiggled it a bit. He smiled wider, worked his way up her foot, over her ankle.
While this had been going on, the others of the group had gathered on nearby lounges, chatting and ordering drinks. Aleria noted with satisfaction that every one of them was seated in such a way as to be able to see Kalmein and herself. It was time to be gracious.
“So, Plendinta. What did you think of the orchestra?”
Plendinta was the most competent musician in the class, and her good opinion of the band was necessary to acknowledge the success of any party. She smiled cheerfully. “Oh, I think they did very well. It was the usual group, you know, but I noticed a couple of additions. Did you see the percussionist?”
Several of the girls made swooning gestures. “He must have some kind of tribal background. I’ve never seen hands move that fast, and that dark skin, well, it’s just sooo…”
One of the boys snorted. “I suppose some of you girls would call him handsome. All I know is, he put an incredible beat in to that Rambala.”
There was general agreement. Talk swirled in different directions, and Aleria turned her attention to her partner. Pulling her feet from his hands, she reversed her position to lay her head on his lap instead. “What are you going to do now?” She looked up at him through partly closed lashes. He really was handsome.
“Since I’ve just been playing with your feet, I suppose you don’t want my dirty hands messing with your face, do you?”
Sitting upright in mock pique, she managed to rest her hand farther up his thigh than was strictly necessary. His leg was firm, well muscled. “Why Kalmein, how unromantic of you!”
He raised his hands in innocence. “Just trying to keep you happy, my dear.” When he lowered them, they slid down her shoulders, to rest on her waist, his thumbs just under her breasts, but not quite touching them.
She leaned forward. Viewed from this angle, the bodice of her gown left little to be imagined. “Then I suppose you’re forgiven.” She looked straight into his eyes for a moment, then away again.
She looked back at him, seriously this time. For that one moment, when she had looked in his eyes, the game had disappeared. He was a real person, someone she had known for years. How could she go through this charade with him? Did she really want to take him into one of those perfumed alcoves, with everyone else politely and enthusiastically looking the other way?
Then his left hand, the one hidden from the rest of the room, slid upward, and she realized that he, too, was playing the game. And enjoying it immensely.
She waited just long enough to let him know that she didn’t mind, then slipped away. “I have to make a little trip.”
“Don’t be long.”
She let her fingers trail down his leg as she rose. “I couldn’t bear it, darling.”
In the women’s functionary, she gave herself a once-over. She looked pretty good, taking into account the wavy and stained nature of the mirror. On an impulse, she slipped out of her undergarments. Tying the strings of her gown back up, she regarded her profile. Not bad, if she tied them just a bit tighter. Not too noticeable, except at close range, which was right where she wanted the most effect.
Picking up the discarded items she realized that, scanty as they were, there was no room for them in the small pouch, which was all that the designer had allowed for a purse. She considered other alternatives: leaving them behind, putting them with her shawl…
Then she laughed. What a ridiculous thing to be worrying about. With a quick twist, she opened her gown and re-dressed herself. This whole evening was beginning to take on an aura of unreality. Recalling that she had actually said, “I couldn’t bear it, darling,” she looked around, wishing that Mito or one of the Twins was there to share it. Since she was alone, she just chuckled and headed back to her lover.
Her lover. She looked at him as she crossed the room. Could she consider this boy as a lover? In spite of his good looks and his fine evening dress, he still looked a whole lot like the kid wh
o used to throw overripe plums at her every fall on the way home from school.
“Well, you two look pretty comfortable over there.”
She grinned towards Plendinta, who was flanked by three young men. “It only gets better.”
With that cryptic response, she slid back beside Kalmein, moving into the role, more aware of the audience, her hesitancy forgotten.
They chatted about nonsense while playing a delicious round of “put your hand where no one else can see,” until Aleria started to feel distinctly stimulated. If she didn’t do something soon, she felt that she might become indiscreet. The slight twinge that thought gave her allowed her the presence of mind to break away.
“Let’s walk around a bit.”
He looked into her face a moment, then grinned. “I don’t think I’d better.”
She looked down. “Oh. I see.”
“Right. So would everyone else.”
“Why don’t you just sit there for a while and calm down, and I’ll see what kind of wine they have.” She made a show of moving casually, stopping to talk to several people on the way to the bar. There, she asked for two small glasses of a dry red wine that she especially enjoyed. Holding them carefully, she returned to their couch.
“Ready to move now?” She held his glass high enough that he had to rise to take it.
“If you’ll stand in front of me.”
“Not too close. I don’t want to make things worse.”
“Oh, don’t you?”
“Not quite yet.”
Laughing, they set off around the room, visiting the groups who were talking, avoiding the couples that weren’t. Bottles stood on every table, and even though her glass was small, she sampled a good portion of them.
As they circulated, Aleria kept moving in a certain direction. She had been keeping her eye on an alcove, less luxurious than the rest but more secluded. She knew it was unoccupied, and that there was a group lounging a short distance away from it. As the conversation flagged where they were talking, she pulled Kalmein’s arm, steered him to the back of that group. They approached casually, not attracting attention. At the last minute she tugged him aside and they slipped, unobtrusively she hoped, between the curtains.
A single, tall candle was burning on the dark wooden table, and it was difficult to see any details of the furniture, which consisted mainly of a low, wide couch of midnight blue velvet. Aware of a slight dizziness, she sat herself down, carefully placing her glass beside the candle. There was a splash of wine left in the glass, and for a moment she watched the flame flickering in its depths.
She turned and looked up at Kalmein, his face half-hidden in the darkness outside the candle’s range. Why was he hesitating? “Joining me?”
“I suppose.” He slid in beside her, his hands pulling her towards him, moving across her body. It was so easy to relax against him, to feel his body so close. When she tried, it seemed that her arms would not move to reach for him, but he did not seem to notice.
It was pleasant enough to feel him touching her, his hands light on her body, his lips at her ear and neck. She lay back, drifting on a current of sensation, her eyes half-closed, the candlelight flickering on the ceiling.
So this was what it was like. This was love. At least, it was lust. She knew she didn’t love him, but that didn’t matter. All that mattered was the feeling smoldering in her. She sighed, knew she was smiling, and hoped he would notice.
She opened her eyes a bit, focused more clearly. Kalmein’s eyes were half-closed too, his face slack and vacant, and she realized with a start that the expression, in any other context, would look incredibly stupid. Did her face look like that, too? She stifled a giggle.
His eyes cleared, his face took back expression. “Is something wrong?”
She lay back again, wondering what to do. What was wrong with her? Maybe she did need a bit of persuading. It was becoming obvious that she wouldn’t get through this on her own. As he pressed himself down on her, she closed her eyes and lay still for a moment, to see if it helped.
It didn’t. It felt more and more as if someone was pushing her, forcing her to do what she didn’t want to do. She opened her eyes.
His face, close above her, had that same vacant expression, but there was an underlying bestiality that chilled her. “Wait a minute, Kalmein.”
“I don’t want to wait.” His knee slid between hers, his hands pulling more firmly at her gown. “You’ve been keeping me waiting all evening.”
She twisted, her body tensing. “But Kalmein, it isn’t right. I don’t feel…”
He stopped moving, staring directly at her, but his eye sockets were shadowed to dark pits in the wavering light. “Listen, girl. You are not going to lead me on all night, right up to the final moment, then shut me out. You don’t play that kind of trick with me!”
His hand reached behind her neck, pulled her face close to his. He kissed her roughly, pressing his lips against hers, his tongue searching.
It was too much. The dizziness was gone, leaving a queasiness in her stomach that threatened to increase, and quickly. She tried to break his hold. “No, Kalmein…”
“Yes, Aleria!” His knee jammed up into her crotch, and a jolt of pain surged through her. Then she was back on the practice floor, her hands in the proper position, her enemy unaware of the danger, just as the instructor had said. The power of her anger flared with the pain, but at the last moment she managed her anger enough to keep the blow under control. Her fists landed on either side of his neck, just below the ear; not too hard, just enough to show she was serious.
A stifled shout broke from his lips, and he jumped up from the couch. He stood a moment, staring at her, his fingers massaging the sides of his neck. She had a moment of fear, then, as his anger showed. She sat up, pulled her feet beneath her. She cringed as he leaned over her, but all he did was hiss in a hoarse whisper.
“What in the name of all the the Gods there are do you think you’re doing?”
Reassured, she glowered up at him. “I said I didn’t feel right.”
He sneered. “You didn’t feel right. You certainly made sure that I would be feeling right. What’s your game, anyway?”
“It isn’t a game. I just don’t think it would be such a good idea.” Even as she spoke, she knew how weak her words sounded.
There was a moment’s silence, and she was aware of laughter and the clink of glasses from outside the curtain.
“It’s just power, isn’t it? You get a kick from making a man want you so much, but you’re not ready to come through with your side of the bargain!”
A gush of indignation shot through her. “That is not true!”
He had calmed some, and his contempt was somehow more frightening than his anger. “Then give me another interpretation. Prove to me that you’re not just a spoiled child, wanting everything, not wanting to pay for it.”
How dare he speak to her like that, like she was a child! “Spoiled child? You’re one to talk about spoiled children! I said I didn’t feel well, and did you have any concern for me? No! All you could think of was that you weren’t getting what you wanted, so you decided to take it. If I hadn’t hit you, you would have, too. I know what that’s called!”
His face paled, even in the ruddy candlelight, but his voice was low. “You witch. You would lead me on like that, and then cry rape? And they’d believe you, wouldn’t they, because your mother comes from one of the gods-bedamned Exalted Families. Do you know what that would do to me? I’d be ruined and my family shamed. And all so you can have your twisted fun. To think I’ve known you all these years, and I never suspected you were like that.”
The justice of his words slapped against her, but she refused to waver. “If you’re so worried about your precious little family, then act accordingly. Save your strongman act for the girls down on Lime Street, if they like that sort of thing, or if you can pay them enough to put up with it. Don’t try it in polite society.”
He laug
hed shortly. “Polite society! Look around you, Aleria. This isn’t a polite place, and you knew it when you brought me here.”
“I brought you here? I didn’t see you hanging back any.”
“No, I didn’t, and neither did you. Not at the beginning. You have to admit that, Aleria.”
She sighed. “Yes, Kalmein, I admit that. I was thinking, when we first came in, that maybe…” The thought was repugnant to her. “Well I was thinking about it anyway. But it didn’t work out. Why did you have to be so mean?”
“Mean? I wasn’t mean. I just though you wanted to be persuaded a bit more.”
“You call that persuasion? It might work on a horse that won’t jump a fence. I suggest you take it out of your bag of tricks for the persuading of young ladies.”
“Somehow you keep making this sound like it’s all my fault.”
“Well, accept your share of the blame, then.”
“Then you accept yours.”
She glared at him. “We both know that a woman has the right to refuse a man at any time, and no gentleman will force his attentions on her.”
He turned away for a moment, and his shoulders stiffened. Then he turned back. “Aleria, I’m going to try to be nice about this. I’m going to assume that you really do believe that you didn’t do anything wrong, and that you really aren’t the kind of person to play that kind of games with a man’s affections. I’m going to assume that you will some day grow up, and realize what you have done tonight. I have to do this, because otherwise I have to assume that you are not a very nice person, and I hope I have a better judgement of people than to get mixed up with someone like that.”
Having made this little speech, he bowed. Then, with a quick motion, he tossed the curtain aside and stepped out. She heard his boot heels fading across the floor, and then silence. Then the sounds of the room started again, the murmur of voices, the sound of cutlery. Had everyone really been watching him leave?
She waited until she was certain of her composure, then left the alcove. To her surprise, the room was almost empty. All the single boys were gone. Only a few couples remained, and a small group of girls, gathered together in a corner. She knew what they were waiting for. They were silent as she approached, making no pretence of conversation, just watching her. She put on a bright face.
“So have you all finished celebrating?”
Plendinta did not respond to her smile but looked at her quizzically. “Yes. How about you?”
“I think so. Shall we depart?” She turned and walked to the entrance, where an attendant was passing out shawls.
The other girls scrambled to join her, Hana in the lead. “I think I noticed Kalmein leaving a moment ago. In a bit of a hurry?”
“Probably.”
“Come on, Aleria. We’re dying to know. What happened?”
She shrugged. “Oh, I lost interest. He’s not…” she paused. He had treated her abominably, but he didn’t deserve to have his reputation ruined. “Oh he’s just not what I was looking for. You know.” She turned to Plendinta. “So you win. I lose. You happy?”
The other girl’s eyes studied her for a moment. “No, I’m not happy, Aleria. It can’t have been much fun for either of you.”
The accuracy of the comment rocked Aleria for a moment, but she rallied with her brightest smile. “I don’t know. It was pretty good for a while, there.”
She spun into her shawl and skipped down the steps, hoping her laugh didn’t sound too forced.
Out of Mischief: World of Change Book 1 Page 2
