by Leen Elle
Hey Heaven saw your profile and couldn't walk away. I'm totally cool with not wanting to be anything but friends. Are you?
He was uncomfortable about not revealing who he really was but he wasn't going to let that stop him. Selah needed to be corralled before she hurt herself. If he could do that then by all means he would. As Dante had said you just had to keep an eye on them until they saw it your way.
"Did you tell her?" Sean Andrews, his roommate, asked excitedly, "please tell me you did."
"Sort of," Colin told him as he threw his keys on the mirror ledge.
"What kind of answer is sort of?"
"Don't you think it's a little late for this it's," Colin looked at his watch and pulled back to read it, "one thirty in the morning. Don't you have work tomorrow?"
"No."
"You should."
"Hey I pay my rent," Sean objected, "don't take your frustration out on me. Not my fault you were too chicken."
"I didn't chicken out, Andy. Does the phrased 'taken' mean nothing to you?"
"It means they're harder to get."
"You're disgusting, Andy," Colin said picking his way to the bathroom through the laundry strewn about.
"I'm joking man. Jo-king."
"Even if I could get a girl I certainly wouldn't bring her to this dump."
"It's half your dump," he retorted.
"My half is the clean half," Colin threw over his shoulder and past the door as it slammed shut.
Once he had a long soak in the shower he emerged in from the bathroom in brighter spirits. "Sorry about that. It's been a long day."
"You have a point though. The place kind of is a mess. I'll clean it tomorrow."
"I don't want any promises you're not going to keep, Andy."
"I'll do it; I swear and if I have time left over I'll go look for a job."
"That's two big promises for twenty four hours."
"I know," Colin noted the sincerity in Sean's voice as he yawned and turned towards his bedroom; the resolution would last until dawn.
The phone rang early that morning rousing him from the pleasant dream he'd been enjoying. The voice on the other side of the phone was ragged and wheezy.
"Colin, this is Promise."
"You sound awful."
"I was up all night….well… you know. My stomach's only just settled down," he waited for her to continue unsure of the purpose of her call, "I know you have to go to work but can you pick me up some soup before you head in?"
Did he want to look the gift horse in the mouth? "Why did you call me, Prick?"
"Adelie is already at work and," her voice broke off as an ear jarring sneeze zipped through the phone line, "And I don't want Aidan to see me like this."
"He'll see you like this eventually, Promise."
"I just don't want it to be one of my first impressions. Please, Colin."
"You're lucky I can't refuse you anything," Colin said trying to sound moody.
"If it's too much trouble don't bother."
"I'm just teasing, Promise. I'll be there within the hour."
"You're a lifesaver," she gushed as he stepped into the house forty five minutes later.
"Just being a good neighbor," he said trying to shrug off the smile that wanted to split his lips widely; she had called him first.
"This is beyond good neighbor. To do this normally is on thing. To do this knowing you would have to see me like this," she said gesturing to her robe and slippered feet, "that's something special."
"You don't look that bad, Prick."
"Just like I'm what was in the toilet." She blushed prettily at her comparison and fingered the tops of the soups, reading the labels. "All my favorites."
She picked up a lone can between her fingers and turned up her nose. "That's for when I come over to check on you tonight."
"You don't have to check up on me. I'm sure I'll be fine."
"Then humor me and let me set my mind at ease."
"That's agreeable." Setting the can down amongst the others she began to walk him to the door. "You better go before Alex sees you; she'll never let you leave if she does."
As if to say she wouldn't be left out the affectionate feline came and twined between his legs. "Going to tie me up so I stay, Alex?"
"Alex!" Promise scolded reaching down to remove her. Alex protested loudly and boldly when Promise went to pick her up. Groaning in frustration Promise glared down at the small bundle of mischief. "You'll have to get her, Colin. I'm not feeling up to her shenanigans right now."
The cat was just as resistant to his efforts. Chuckling at her persistence he whispered to Promise, "go open a can of that soup. If I know Alex that should be all it'll take to free me up."
Whistling he made his way up Promise's driveway ignoring the honks he received at his slightly erratic driving. So what if he was bobbing his head to the radio; the car may not be going in a straight line but it wasn't going anywhere but on the road. He was too happy to be seeing Promise again let a little thing like what people thought of him get it the way. However, when he entered her domicile his spirits flattened.
"Open the can of New England too and set it on the stove, Aidan. We have company."
"Aidan's here?" Colin questioned trying not to let his disappointment show. He'd been looking forward to a little time alone with her.
"I was feeling better after that soup this morning and invited him over," she gave him a shy smile and tucked a stray piece of hair behind her ear. She'd obviously showered and fixed her hair. Her robe and slippers had vanished and in its place she wore a subtly sexy ensemble he'd brought her last year. Feeling awkward he motioned back out the door.
"Perhaps I should go. I'm obviously interrupting."
"No stay," she held to his arm as she spoke, "I don't want to be completely alone with Aidan just yet."
Remembering some of the things she'd told him about Aidan, at least the old Aidan, he nodded. Besides the fact he'd been seeing another girl behind her back Aidan had begun crossing lines. Lines Promise wasn't comfortable with. Her compliant was he was being too forward. Colin knew that meant he was taking too many privileges. Aidan had only slipped her the ring when she threatened to break it off because he wasn't being serious. At least she had the common sense to be wary of that.
"I'll stay," Colin assented.
Dinner was strained but civil and after the plates had been cleared and Promise wandered off to go drug herself up again Aidan cornered him into conversation. "What's going on between you and Hope?"
"We're just friends."
"That's what she thinks," Aidan accused, "what do you think?"
"I think that's all we can ever be. After all what chance do I have against such a fine upstanding specimen like yourself?"
"You're mocking me."
"Are you saying that I'm lying?" he asked smugly knowing he had trapped the man. Without insulting himself, Aidan couldn't accuse him further. Frustrated by Colin's attitude and stance Aidan was visibly relieved to see Promise return. Going to her side he made sure his contact with her skin was visible.
"How are you holding up?"
"My stomach's a little uneasy," she admitted; Colin noticed she had removed her make up. Her cheeks were slightly pink and the rest of her features were pale. Her fever must be rising again. "I'm going to lay down for a bit."
"Then we'll let you lie down," Aidan said heading for the door. Looking about at the state of the house Colin frowned to himself. The place was a mess.
"I've got to use the restroom," he fibbed, "I'll follow you out later."
Aidan eyed him critically and left his stance displaced by suspicion. Once he was gone Alex trotted out of her hiding place and began weaving between his legs as he walked. Promise watched him in confusion as he entered the kitchen. Alex jumped up beside his elbow on the counter asking for the leftovers.
"I thought you had to go to the bathroom."
"I had to get Aidan out of here. That's what I had to do."
/> "What are you doing?"
"Cleaning," he told her as he began to run the water, "you go lay down. I can let myself out."
At least this one wasn't a pervert, Selah thought with relief. He was only asking for friendship but that was all that her profile offered. He seemed sincere enough to at least warrant a reply. Plus his handle was curious. Eden was an ancient, now absent, utopia. If she interpreted correctly something had shattered his perfect world.
No picture cutie? Well a man of mystery is a man of interest. And I'm very interested in getting to know you better. Read your profile but I'm curious… Why did you choose that handle? It's a very personal first question but I gotta know. What shattered your Eden?
His reply didn't come for many days however when it did it was frank.
The girl I love… has no interest in me. A friend has introduced me to numerous other women but none I could ever love like her. The entire tri-county area about my house exhausted this was my only resort. I don't think I could ever love anybody but her but I'm not giving up on love. There must be somebody out there. But right now it's still hard to believe it's anybody but her.
His tale was sad but perhaps shared by many of the desperate men she met on IM-Loved. However, this man, Eden, didn't sound desperate. He just sounded…lonely.
That's so sad but there must be somebody out there. You just have to give them a chance. If you never give anyone a chance you'll never know. Get crazy. Just browse through some profiles and wink at them. See what happens.
His reply was short and to the point once again.
Is that what you've been doing? Does it work?
She replied happily and almost as if she was speaking to her girlfriend giddily about the newest boy that had entered the room.
I have! Well actually he did. He saw my profile and offered to help me with the book a I'm writing. We got to talking and… I think I may be falling in love!
This time Eden made no reply.
"Daydreaming about Aidan?" Adelie accused playfully as they sat at a small table in the Half Shell.
Promise smiled sheepishly and asked, "what did I miss?"
"I was just asking if I could show your first completed chapters to my publisher."
"They're not that good, Adelie, honestly."
"You're much too modest," Adelie chided, "I nearly sent them off without asking."
"Adelie!"
"But I didn't. You know I wouldn't do that to you." After a pause Adelie asked again, "so can I? Can I send them?"
"If you're so sure they'll be published go ahead."
"You won't be sorry."
"Don't say that, Adelie; when you say that I always am."
"You've agreed to let a publisher to see your book, Hope?" Aidan asked in an unnerving manner; Promise fidgeted with unease as he leaned forward and covered her hand that was on the table between them. Even in the low light she could make out his uncertain features. "Are you sure that's wise?"
"Wise?"
"I'd hate to see you disappointed in anything," he said softly as he reached up and stroked her cheek, pushing several honey strands away.
"I need to at least try," Promise responded as she slipped her hand from his and sat back, "don't you think I'm capable of getting published?"
"But you're a nurse. Surely you're not doing it for money."
"I'm not. But it's been a dream of mine since I started writing to be published."
"Then who am I to deny you a dream," Aidan took up, singing a different tune. His duality of reason made her uneasy yet again and she felt as if he was manipulating her. "Tell me what I ask, Aidan. What is your intention towards me?"
"What has my intention always been?"
"Your intensions have not always been clear," she returned in a tone confused in itself and low. She didn't want to make a scene and she wished to give him a chance to redeem himself. Her heart ached for his duplicity to only be conceived of a restless mind.
"You haven't forgiven me," he observed as if surprised the fact could be true.
"I have but a wounded heart only knows it hurts. I want to trust you, Aidan."
"Then trust me."
"It's not that simple."
"Let me prove I'm not as bad as you think," tucking his lip him his tooth a moment he corrected, "that I'm not as bad as I was."
"How?"
"You obviously need to know me better," he said slipping into a more confident stance and brightening in continence, "come away with me this weekend."
"Just you and me?"
"Of course not. I would never ask that of you."
"I do have off this weekend but I don't know if anyone else will be able to come on such short notice…"
"I'll invite a couple of my friends too. We'll go up to the mountains for a few days. Relax in the shade of spring and hike. You learn all sorts of things about a person when you're around them that much. I can't think of a better solution."
Promise gave a tentative smile at his enthusiasm. He was right; no matter how much they told each other there was no substitute for physical awareness. It was only Tuesday; they might be able to pull this together yet.
"Sorry, Prom," Adelie apologized, "but I'm looking at a busy weekend. Kind of put some things off until the last minute." She gave promise a sheepish smile. "I'd go if I could."
"Well I guess that leaves my last resort as Colin."
"Last resort? I would have thought you asked him first."
"Colin and Aidan mix about as pleasantly as a spark and a drought."
"Who's your spark?"
"What kind of question is that?"
"You and Aidan seem…tense."
"We've hit a rough spot."
"A dry spot?"
"He's not the drought. But Colin's the spark. Everything goes fine until…"
"Hold on a second, Promise. Think about what you're saying. Colin's not aggressive. Maybe you're missing something."
"Like what?"
"Maybe Aidan's the instigator. He probably feels his claim is being threatened because Colin's wary of stepping back. He's very protective of you."
"It was sweet when we were in high school but now it's just frustrating."
"Then tell him that. He'll listen."
"I don't want to hurt his feelings; his intentions are good."
"Be gentle and you won't. He needs to know he's making you uncomfortable."
"Maybe you're right."
"I am."
"I'll talk to him about it tomorrow. He's taking me to pick up my new car."
She'd better tell him of her unease after she was already in her car. In the off chance he took offense to her request she didn't want to be stranded for the next week without a vehicle.
Did I make you uncomfortable? I'm like that…just saying whatever's on my mind without thinking. I'm sorry if that's what's halted your reply. After all why would a complete stranger want to know something so personal? I mean I'm not even sure it's just… I feel different with him. A good kind of different you know. If you get this message please reply. I don't want my large mouth to be a gap between us.
There passed a large amount of time before his reply came.
I'm glad you're happy, honestly. Every girl should have the right to be happy. Anyone who loves you should be happy for you too. It was just a shock to read that. Then again sometimes it's the people you know you'll never meet again that you can truly open up too huh? Sometimes friends are too close.
Feeling his pain and sensing that perhaps his closing remark was meaningful beyond its words she gave the simple and sober reply:
Yeah.
When she entered her realm of assignment the next day Promise knew her trials wouldn't be light. The moment she walked in the door of the dementia unit she was greeted with the distorted reality therein.
"My baby I need to get home. My baby!" Old Miss. Mallon's panicked, creaky voice came upon her followed closely by her body. Taking her in a comforting yet restricting hold Promise led her away
from her portal of escape.
Promise tried to understand the woman's terror. When Marian Mallon was just seventeen years old she began a single parent and just a year after that she was living on her own as a single mother. Though she squeaked by in providing for her daughter her parents made sure civil services kept a close eye on the pair. When her father became unable to sneak her funds any longer her struggle became a futile floundering and her child was taken away. In her dementia the old woman relived the fear of losing her only child frequently. However with her husband there to reassure her she was normally quickly calmed a partial balance was restored to their sanctum on shaken sanity.
When Colin arrived soon after lunch Promise was preoccupied with administering medications. He hung about the desk waiting for her and observing the scatter-organization of chaos.
As Promise passed by with the he leaned on the counter between them and asked casually, "giving them their daily dose or reality?"
"Many of them get more than one," she told him handing a patient her pills. The elderly woman kept them clasp tightly in her palm and scowled up at her nurse. Promise put a hand on her hip and gave her a subtly exasperated look.
"We go through this everyday, Mrs. Helen."
"And will until you stop trying to shove those silly pills down my throat."
After several moments of staring at one another Promise reached down and began to pry the pills out of the frail hand. However, the rest of her aged body rebelled violently. Seeing promise flinch Colin stepped in.
"Let's be civil about this; there must be a solution." Mrs. Helen began to protest and Promise stepped back tentatively and observed. "Let's come to a compromise."
And what might that be young man?" she asked indignantly.
"A reward for the submissive patient. A rose for your trouble."
"I haven't received a rose since I was twenty-three!"
"Then you simply must have one again. It would be my pleasure to purchase one for you."
Looking at him she smiled and looked at Promise setting her posture to defiantly obedient. "I'll take the stupid pills…today."
