“No!” Then, upon reflection, she calmed marginally. “Well, I guess so, yes. Please tell me you understand how weird this all is for me. Just having a boyfriend is huge enough. A big deal actor? Huge. A bazillionaire? Monumental. Jiminy Cricket! What’s next? Are you also a Kennedy?”
Anson shook his head and waited for the shock to hit her, wave after wave. “Most girls only want me because of all that extra stuff. This is probably one of the few places on the map I could’ve gone where I was lucky enough that no one recognized me. Godsend that you happened to live here. I’d pretty much resigned myself to being alone.”
“What else?” Etta breathed, afraid to look up at him. She kept her focus on her mug and braced herself. “There’s got to be more. Tell me everything everyone else knows.”
“No. That’s not a good idea.”
“No? Now I know it’s something bad. I can’t do this if I’m walking in blind. What you’re asking me to do is huge. Close down the business and move across the country? I could actually consider that if I had some idea of what I was walking into.”
Anson tugged his hair and wished for something stronger in his drink to take the edge off this conversation. “Fine, but you have to promise me you won’t leave.”
“Alright. Shoot.”
“I mean, promise, Etta. I’m not proud of a lot of the things I’ve done, and I’m taking a big risk telling you.”
“Cross my heart. I’ll sit right here, barring a nuclear holocaust. I don’t want to get there and have everyone know more about you than I do.”
Anson put his hand on hers, though the gesture did not reassure either of them as he had hoped. “You already know more about me than anyone on the planet. It’s just the details that might freak you out. Promise me you won’t freak out.”
“Now you’re scaring me. I’ll try not to lose my head. Just rip off the bandage already!”
Words poured out of Anson faster than he could censor them. He spoke so quickly, he was sure Etta felt she was under some sort of verbal attack. “I got my start in porn because my stepfather threatened to have my mother cut me off financially. I’ve been engaged twice, and both were publicity moves. I just broke off an engagement before I flew out here. She was a closeted lesbian trying to stave off some rumors. Just a friend. And, well, she was also my costar in the movie that came out not too long ago. We needed to promote the movie. Business arrangement at best. I have three people that keep my career going, and I’d trust them with just about anything – except my personal life. I’m scared of them meeting you. I’m terrified to bring you into my world because it’s so warm here. My life is detached and cold.”
Etta held up her hand to stave off his confession. She was silent while he waited, squirming in his chair. When she finally spoke, it was while she was rubbing her temples to ease the information overload. “Wait. Porn? Stop there. Let’s talk about that for a minute.”
He knew he did not do a good enough job of sliding that past her. “What do you want to know?”
“How many women have you been with?”
“Ever?” Anson struggled to come up with an accurate number. “I honestly don’t have a clue.”
Etta set her mug down, trying not to slam it into the table. “How can you not know something like that?”
Holding up his hands in surrender, he made sure to keep his voice low, so as not to increase the intensity in the room any further. “I’ve been celibate for almost two years. And I’ve been tested since my last time. I’m clean.”
“Excuse me for a second.” She stood and walked to the bedroom, grabbing her cardigan and wrapping it around her tightly. She resumed her seat at the table and watched his anxiety visibly deflate at her return. Something in her softened at this, so her response came out far more demure than the shouting she might otherwise have indulged in. “Why would Chloe not tell me something like that?”
“Chloe probably didn’t know. It was a blip for a while, but no one talks about it anymore. I have a very aggressive agent and a publicist who make sure people like Chloe have a golden image of me. They’re worth every penny.” He leaned his elbow on the table. “So, you know, keep that under your hat.”
“No problem.” Etta despised the judgment her tone oozed with, but did not know how to otherwise react. She tugged at a lock of her long, wavy brown hair as she thought.
“Talk to me, Etta. Please tell me being honest didn’t just cost me you. I’m not proud of everything in my past, but that’s not who I am anymore. I did some stupid things when I was young. I’m ready for someone like you now. I’ll do anything to show you that.”
“Okay.”
“Okay? That’s it? That’s all you got? Please don’t do this.”
Etta’s hands flung out in exasperation. “What do you want me to say? This is light-years out of my league, Anson, and you know it. I’ve never even seen a dirty movie, and now I find out the guy I’m in love with has had tons of wild sex with any number of perfect-looking women who know way more about this kind of stuff than I do.”
“That’s what you’re worried about?” Despite her hesitation, he tugged her off her chair and pulled her onto his lap. “They were jobs. Sure, some of them were nice looking, and yeah, sex feels good. But do you know what it’s like to have cameras pointing at you when you’re trying to enjoy yourself? A director calling out instructions while you have to try and keep yourself hard? It’s not as glamorous as it seems. This is what I want, Etta. You. Us. Trust me when I say that you’re the only woman I ever want to have sex with.”
Etta rolled her eyes. “Now I know you’re lying.”
Something about this made Anson slightly angry. “Why would you say that?”
“You’ve been with dozens of women? Maybe hundreds?” She blanched. “I can’t even think of that.”
“But it’s the truth. All of it. That I’ve been with too many women, and that I want to make love to you more than anyone else.” He took a chance and kissed her shoulder, grateful that she was still malleable to his touch. “You have no idea how sexy it is that I might get to teach you all of this one day if we get married. In my line of work, I only slept with overconfident, domineering women. They knew how they liked it, and thought they knew what I wanted.”
Etta softened in his arms. “Get married? You think about us like that?”
“Only every day. I love you, baby.”
“I love you, too.”
He buried his face in her sweater to hide from her as he spoke. “There’s more.”
“Goodness gracious! What more could there possibly be? A harem?” She felt him shake his head into her bosom, but sensed he could not form the words. There was a shift, and she could feel his fear was greater than hers in that moment. She held his head and ran her fingernails through his hair, lightly massaging his scalp. “What’s wrong?”
He spoke into her sternum, which was covered by her knitted cardigan. “It’s embarrassing. The last time I was with a woman, I couldn’t get it up. That’s never happened to me before, and since then, I sort of lost the taste for it. Maybe I was overexposed and short-circuited or something. I don’t know. What I do know is that you’re the first person to get me going in almost two years, and you weren’t even trying. To say that I would follow you anywhere is an understatement. You own me, baby.” He kissed her neck with more pleading for acceptance than seduction. “So please don’t think there’s anyone else out there for me. It’s you. Only you. When I was a kid, I acted like a kid. But I’m an adult now, and I choose you.”
In that moment, Etta knew there was nothing he could say that would scare her away. Frighten her, sure, but she would always return to his arms, to his lap, to his side. “Alright, then. But no sleeping with anyone else, okay? If we’re together, it’s just you and just me. And I meant what I said that I’m not having sex until I get married. Can you handle that?”
He nodded vigorously into her neck. “Of course. You’re the only thing I want.” His relief was palpable,
and when Etta leaned down to kiss him gently on the lips, they both melted into the acceptance they had been searching for.
Goodbye, Cooper
Anson’s jaw was set from the moment he got out of the shower to the time the knock on the door interrupted their morning. “Can’t I just pay the utilities and keep everything current for you? I don’t like this.”
Etta’s response was firm, as he knew it still would be. “No. I’m not going to sponge off you. That’s not a relationship. This is a Bed and Breakfast. It’s a perfectly functional business. There’s no reason it should be shut down just because I won’t be here.” She stood from the kitchen table and moved to the door, letting Cooper and his newly acquired scowl inside. “Morning, Coop.”
“Yep.” He turned to Anson and nodded once to acknowledge his presence. It was a step up from the last time they encountered each other. “Show me what I need to know.”
Etta did just that. Though Cooper had done repairs on almost everything in the house over the years, she showed him all of it anyway, pausing every now and then to see if he had any questions. Cooper remained silent the entire time until they got to Papa’s office. “What do you want done with this room?” he asked.
“I cleaned it out a while ago, so you’re welcome to use it as your office. Just don’t throw anything out without asking me, okay? Some of the furniture was handmade by him. I’d rather keep it, if that’s alright with you.”
“It’s your house, Etta. Your business. I’m just running it for you.”
Etta let out a gust of air. “I wish things weren’t so weird between us right now.”
“Things are fine. When do you want me to reopen?”
“Whenever you’re ready.” She took a book from Papa’s top desk drawer and handed it to him. “Here’s your ledger. It’s got the dates all the bills need to be paid, and where to send the money. I’ve got you covered for three months from now, so you should have plenty of time to build up some revenue before anything’s due.” She slid the drawer shut. “I hate this.”
“Then don’t go.”
“Not that. This.” She motioned between the two of them. “I don’t like us not being friends.”
“We’re friends. Friends fight sometimes.”
“Not us. We’ve never really fought before.”
“Well, I don’t know what to tell you. I think you’re making a huge mistake. I don’t care how famous he is. You’re not built for that kind of world. Judging by the meds your boy needs, neither is he.”
“Be nice to me, Coop. This is hard enough.”
“Fine. Have a great trip and get a nice tan. Send me a postcard.”
Without waiting for a rare break in his temper, Etta flung her dainty arms around his neck. “I’m sorry things suck right now! I’m still me, though. You have to stop hating me for this.” When he held his body stiff against her, she squeezed tighter. “Please, Coop. This is a big deal, and I’m scared. I need you to be on my side.”
Despite his best efforts at stoicism, Cooper’s thick arms banded around her waist. “I wish you could see that’s what I’m doing.” He wondered if this would be their last moment together. If he would ever see his best friend again. “It could have been me, you know. I could have made you happy.”
Etta pushed away as much of her arguing as she could. “You do. When you’re not being a jerk to me, that is.”
He gripped her tighter. “You know what I mean.”
Etta nodded, wishing she did not. “I know. But it’s too late. I’m with Anson, and I love him. Try to be happy for me.”
He loosened his hold so that he could look down at her face. “But you loved me first.”
“It’s not enough,” she admitted, wishing they could be having any other conversation in the world.
Without waiting for another excuse why he would never be enough for her, Cooper held her face and quickly bent down, mashing his lips to hers.
The protest from her was expected, but it still stung. The few times he had been able to sneak in a kiss, he had beamed with pride, but afterwards wished she had participated a little. There was no mistaking his feelings or his intent this time, though. If she was going to leave, he would be sure she knew what she was leaving behind.
He felt her stiffen, and then her hands moved between them to push him away. Harder he drove the kiss, forcing her to see him in the way he always wished she would. She yelped into his mouth when her back hit the wall, but he did not stop. “Give us a chance!” he growled, hating himself and her in that moment.
“Cooper, stop!” she managed to eke out before he crashed his lips to hers again. She tried to turn her head, but he forced her to hold her position. Fear she had never before known in his presence engulfed her. She clawed at his chest to make her protest clear, but he paid the effort no mind. Before she could stop them, tears began pooling in her eyes. Her limbs began to tremble as they had that terrible day when all of her fight had not been enough.
It was not until her weeping became audible that sense returned to Cooper and he released her. He watched in horror as she slumped to the floor in the corner of the office. When he moved toward her to apologize, she recoiled from him and held her arms up defensively as she quietly sobbed. “Get away from me!”
“Etta, I wasn’t going to… I just wanted to get you to see me how I see you. It was just a kiss. You know I would never push it farther than that. I’m sorry.” Again he moved to comfort her, but she only cried harder, pushing him away when he got too near. “I’m sorry, okay! It was a bad idea.”
Etta’s tears threatened to choke her voice from her, so she tried to shoo him out as fast as she could. “You know everything you need to know to run the place. Please go.”
“Come on, Etta. I didn’t mean to scare you.”
The remorse in his eyes was sincere, but Etta was not ready to forgive. “Go! You can come back on the fifteenth to get the keys.”
“But you leave on the fifteenth.”
“Get out!” she cried, hugging her knees to her chest. When he tried to pull her up, she shouted, “Anson!”
Cooper dropped her hand and spun on his heel, exiting the room. He rushed past Anson on his way out, and did not stop until he was out of the house and in his car, barreling down the driveway.
Chloe’s Rite of Passage
Anson barged into the room, ready to tear apart whatever needed rending, or fix whatever needed mending. “What happened? What’s wrong?”
Etta shook her head, unable to put words to the problem that was still making her limbs quake.
It was amazing how well Anson knew her cues. Without needing the details, he held his hands to her to prove their innocence. “Do you want to stay here, or do you want me to help you get to the couch?”
“Bed,” she requested in a whimper that threatened more tears.
In a maneuver that required a man in peak physical condition, Anson lifted her off the ground from his current crouch and carried her to the bedroom. He kicked off his shoes and crawled under the covers with her, spooning her shaking form. He did not speak, though she could tell he had plenty of questions. Anson was a patient man. He combed his fingers through her hair until her trembling subsided.
Her eyes were closed, and when Anson whispered her name, she did not respond. He wanted to charge after Cooper and demand to know what happened, but she was more important right now. He held her while she napped. Every time he tried to slip away, she would stir and whimper for him, half-awake, but still clearly upset.
When evening came, he could ignore his body no longer. He was hungry and needed the bathroom. As gently as he could, he extracted himself from her.
Cooking was Etta’s area. She taught him quite a bit, but it was mostly breakfast stuff. He took out the old food-spattered cookbook he had seen her rifle through on several occasions and leafed through the pages. He went to the unfamiliar recipes and found “Papa’s Beef Burgundy”. Reading through the ingredients list and instructions, he decided to
try his luck and cook Etta a meal, hoping the whole “it’s the thought that counts” idea would cover over any accidental food poisoning.
When he got stumped on the second point, he decided to call for backup. Chloe was the number four speed dial on the landline, her bubbly voice answering with a, “So, you’ve decided to surface from all that mind-blowing sex you’ve finally decided to give him? Glad you thought of me. Do you even stop to come up for meals? Or is it strictly rehydrating in between rounds?”
“Um, actually that’s what I’m calling about.”
There was a pause, and then Chloe burst out with several strung together apologies, ending with, “I thought Etta was calling!”
Anson chuckled. “It’s fine. I have a cooking question. I’m trying to make Etta some dinner, but I don’t know how to brown the meat. How brown are we talking? Like dark brown? Not red?”
Chloe’s tone was hesitant when she answered. “You’re cooking? Where’s Etta?”
“Thanks for that vote of confidence.” Anson sighed. “She’s been sleeping all day. Cooper came over to go through the business stuff, then he stormed out and she won’t say a word. I put her in bed, and she’s been there ever since. I wanted to make her dinner, but I don’t really know what I’m doing. Really wish you guys had takeout up here.”
“No, no. No takeout. There’s a pizza place in Foot Town, but it’s cold by the time it gets up here. What you’re doing is really sweet. If you need help, I can be there in five. She had a fight with Coop, huh?” Chloe’s pause brought her tone down from schoolgirl to woman in a breath. “I’ll beat it out of him. Don’t worry. Do you want me to stop at the store, or do you have everything you need?”
Anson grimaced. “Oh. I didn’t really check.” He did a quick inventory of the ingredients and was grateful to report they had everything – except a competent cook. He hung up with Chloe and eyed the hunk of beef, wondering how much harm he could do to it if he started without her.
Liberating Mr. Gable Page 13
