by Elin Peer
“Oh no.” Her face tilted to one side with a sympathetic glance. “I can see how afraid you are of being rejected again.” Mila was misreading my reaction as fear. “Don’t be scared. If Louisa doesn’t pick you tomorrow, I’ll pick you for my champion next year, if you want me to.”
Laura moved closer. “Mila, please don’t make a promise like that. It wouldn’t be fair to the other competitors in your tournament.”
“I know, but Marco has a good heart and he would treat me well. How is it different from you promising Dad that you would pick him? You did it out of pity too.” Her eyes flew to me. “I’m sorry, Marco, I probably shouldn’t have said that.”
“It’s okay, Mila. I know you’re only trying to be nice, but I would never fight in your tournament.”
“Why not?”
“Because I was your mentor. It would be weird.”
“Right.” She nodded, with her kind blue eyes expressing sympathy. “Then let’s hope that Louisa picks you tomorrow.”
I was grateful for Mila’s kindness and the way Laura and Magni helped distract me from my misery by discussing the fights with me. Yet, something urgent was pressing inside of me. I needed to talk to Shelly and be a hundred percent sure she wasn’t pregnant before I fought my next fight. Excusing myself, I found a quiet place and called her up.
CHAPTER 18
Proof
Shelly
I had never felt inclined to throw things around.
Until now.
A tournament was a huge event in the Northlands and sent out live for all to see. Right now, there wouldn’t be a bar in the country that wasn’t tuned in, and more people were following the tournament from their homes.
I was in my office, watching Marco’s fight – hating how the two commentators were bashing him.
“Looks like the underdog is showing up the champion in this fight. Such a disappointment for many to see Marco Polo look so lost.”
The other commentator laughed. “Good one, but you’re right, physically he looks to be in great shape, but mentally he doesn’t seem prepared. I wonder if he’s still battling the disappointment of being rejected in the last two tournaments.”
“Yes, this champion has been close a few times. Could be that he was so sure of himself against this underdog that he’s a bit rattled by the hits young Neil Jefferson has gotten on him so far.”
“Oh, here we go again. Fuck, look at that energy Jefferson is attacking with. He really wants to win, doesn’t he? Son of the Devil, that had to hurt. Did you see the punch to Marco Polo’s face?”
For someone who had always claimed that I wasn’t attached to a certain outcome, watching Marco fight was a rude awakening.
I was scared to my bones that Marco would be injured and I had already decided that if he got paralyzed, I’d dedicate my genius to finding a way to make him mobile again.
“Would you look at the way Marco is protecting himself? Why doesn’t he fight back?”
“That’s a good question. It’s hard to watch, knowing that this is the same warrior who defeated great champions like Danielson and Zillinger just a few years ago.”
“You’re right. I would like to see him use the fighting skills we know he has.”
My fingers covered my eyes when Marco took punch after punch. I couldn’t watch it, and turned my head away.
“And if you look to the right corner you’ll notice Magni Aurelius is shouting at the contestants. He looks like he wants to go in and fight himself, doesn’t he?”
“I wish he would; this fight hasn’t been as entertaining as we’d hoped it would be.”
“No, but look at that…” one of the commentators gave a loud outburst. “Dancing demons… what a comeback.” The commentators were laughing and it made me dare to look again. “Such a perfect roundhouse kick, and yes… look at that, Marco Polo just followed up with a classic high kick that knocked Neil to the ground.”
“I think that’s it. Neil isn’t coming back up, is he?”
“No, he’s not. Now, you might not be able to hear this at home, but people in the audience are cheering for the kill.”
“That’s not his style, is it?”
“No. Marco isn’t that kind of fighter; we know that from previous years. So far he has spared the life of each of his opponents.”
“I have to say that as an old-school fighter I think it’s a shame that it’s becoming the norm. There used to be a much bigger risk involved and that was what made these games so exciting.”
“I have to agree with you on that. So far we’ve only had two deaths in this tournament, which has to be the lowest number in history.” He chuckled, low. “Soon they’ll accept safety gear as well.”
“We shouldn’t joke about something like that; they might hear us and think it’s an excellent idea… oh, and here comes Commander Magni Aurelius. He just entered the arena and he’s calling out Marco as the winner.”
The two men were laughing. “Looks like Marco Polo found his way back after all. Let’s see the last part in slow motion again.”
My mouth gaped when Marco jumped up, spun in the air, and kicked the guy with brutal force. I’d seen Marco fight before, but it had always been for training purposes and this was for real – the concentration on his face, his eyes closing and opening, and the way every muscle on his body was working as a weapon. They zoomed in on Neil’s face when he landed on the ground, his head bouncing a few times with his lips and cheeks vibrating because of the slow-motion effect.
All the talk about fights and deaths made me turn off the show. Marco might be the winner of this fight, but in a few hours he’d be at it again, putting his life at risk.
Picking up a small tool, I threw it against the door. It made a thumping sound before it fell on the floor, mocking me by not making a dent in the door or a difference to anything.
I should find something heavier to throw, I concluded, but the practical part of me didn’t see the point. Breaking a door won’t mend your broken heart.
It would be easier if I could attain some detachment and not care.
If we were meant to be together, he would have fallen in love with me by now.
We’d shared a month together and rationally, I understood that Marco was too attached to his goal of winning a tournament to being open to anything else.
If I were a bigger person, I would find satisfaction in Marco’s being happy, even if it’s with another woman.
My head was in my hands, my elbows on my desk in front of me. Maybe I would be a bigger person in time. Right now, all I could feel was sorry for myself.
I’d been deep in my own self-pity for a while when the sound of an incoming call made me jump a little.
A picture of Marco, with his amazing curls and charming smile, popped up in front of me, making my heart hammer away.
Don’t answer, a warning sounded in my head, but my shaking hands accepted the call before I could stop myself.
“Shelly.” Marco’s face was serious.
Brushing my hair back, I put on a brave face. “Hi, Marco. Congratulations on your first win.”
“You saw the fight?”
“Some of it.”
“How much?”
I bit my lip. “Most of it.”
“Hmm, it wasn’t my best fight.”
“You won.”
“Yeah, I did.” He frowned. “Look, I think one of the reasons that I couldn’t focus in this fight is that I need proof.”
“Proof of what?”
“My next fight is in less than three hours but I need to have my head on straight. Did you really get your period?”
“Yes, I told you.” My already racing heart was beating so fast I could feel it pumping in my ears. With all the energy pouring into my blood, I couldn’t sit still and got up from my chair.
“Good. Then it should be no problem for you to show me.”
I lowered my brows. “What do you mean?”
“Show me.” Marco looked dead serious.
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I gave a sound somewhere between a gasp and a laugh. “Show you?”
“Yes. You’ve pulled down your pants for me before. I need to see that you’re having your period.”
“You want to see the blood in my panties?”
“Yes.”
“That’s gross.”
“Believe me, I can handle some blood. I just need to be sure that you’re not carrying my child.”
My hands were scratching my neck, suddenly feeling like the room temperature had gone up to that of a sauna.
“Shelly?”
“Mmm.”
“Show me.”
“I don’t want to.”
Marco angled his head. “Shelly, look at me and tell me again that you’re having your period.”
I hesitated, my fingers fiddling, my feet moving around.
“Shellyyyy.”
“Marco, I…” My voice failed me, and I blew out air and looked up at the ceiling. “I can’t.”
“Why?”
When I didn’t answer, Marco drew the logical conclusion. “You aren’t having your period, are you?”
“No.” It came out as a whisper.
“Then why the fuck am I here?” he exclaimed in a deep voice.
“I’m not pregnant. My period is just late, that’s all.”
“You keep saying that, but it’s been over a month since we had sex the first time and when I asked you when you last had your period, you said it had been a few weeks before we were together the first time. That means that you are more than two weeks late. I’ve looked it up, Shelly, and you should have gotten it by now.”
“Marco, even if I am pregnant, it shouldn’t stop you from following your dream.”
“My dream?” He was frowning. “Shelly, you’re carrying my child. That changes everything.”
“You don’t know that I am for sure.”
“I’m coming home.” There was such decisiveness in his words, but it was freaking me out.
“Marco, what if I’m not pregnant? Don’t throw away your chance to win the money and your Northlander bride. You’re going to resent me forever.”
“I’m leaving now and I’m coming straight to you. Don’t go anywhere. I’ll be there tonight and then we’ll find a doctor.”
“Don’t be foolish,” I objected. “If you want proof, I can go to a doctor myself and call you with the result.”
Marco shook his head. “No. You already lied to me about this twice.”
“Because I don’t want to come between you and your dream.”
He looked like he wanted to scream at me but turned his head and collected himself before he spoke. “Promise me that you’ll be there when I get back. If you take off to the Motherlands, I don’t know what I’ll do to you, Shelly.”
“Is that a threat?”
“More like a warning. I fucking told you not to lie to me, and you did it again.”
“It was a white lie,” I defended myself.
“No, it was a huge, fucking, life-altering lie, and if you can’t see that then you’re not as smart as everyone thinks.”
“I didn’t mean to lie, it just happened.”
“Just be there when I get back. Do you understand?”
“Yes,” I breathed.
Marco stared at me, not talking for some seconds.
“I promise,” I added before we ended the call.
For three hours I walked around in a haze waiting for Marco to arrive. At least seven times I checked to see if I’d gotten my period, but there wasn’t even a bit of spotting in my panties.
With my late period ruining his dream, it was no wonder that Marco was serious when he arrived. The first thing he said when I met him outside my office building was, “From now on there can be no more lying, Shelly.”
I nodded and looked down as I followed him to his drone. For the first five minutes we didn’t talk and the atmosphere between us was loaded with all the things unsaid.
“I don’t normally lie, you know,” I whispered in a low voice. “In fact, people have often accused me of being too honest.”
Marco gave me a sideways glance but didn’t speak.
“I get that you’re disappointed with me.” I studied his profile when he looked ahead again. His beard was shorter than when I last saw him a week ago, and it made him look more like the Marco I’d fallen in love with all those years ago when I was just a teenage girl. Except back then he’d been smiling and cracking jokes.
“I should have been honest with you. I know that the timing of this is… umm… very unfortunate.”
“You think?”
“If I had been honest with you last Sunday, I could have done a test before the tournament and you’d know that I’m not pregnant.”
“Stop saying that.” It came through gritted teeth.
“Why? I thought we were both hoping that I’m not pregnant.”
Marco turned his head in a slow movement and gazed straight at me.
“What?” I asked with some confusion. “You’re hoping that I’m pregnant?”
“Unlike you, I always wanted children.”
“Yeah, but with someone like Louisa,” I burst out.
“You’ll marry me,” he said in a matter-of-fact way that left me cold.
Shaking my head, I gave him an answer in the same flat tone. “No, Marco. I won’t.”
He didn’t look surprised but said, “Then you’ll sign a contract.”
“What contract?”
“That I can see our child.”
“What are you talking about?”
“If you’re serious about living in the Motherlands I want a guarantee that I’ll be able to see our child and be a father to my kid.”
“This is silly. I’m telling you that I’m not pregnant.”
“We’ll know tomorrow morning. I found a doctor who can see you then. He’s a friend of a friend, and when we go there we’ll pretend to be married. Do you understand?”
“Yes.”
“Good.” Marco still looked very serious. “We’re staying at my apartment tonight.”
“Why couldn’t you just pick me up tomorrow morning then?” I asked.
“Because I would worry all night that you’d be going to the Motherlands.”
“I see.”
We were quiet the rest of the way to Marco’s apartment and when we got there, he moved around his kitchen and living room, leaving me to wonder what he was thinking about.
“Do you hate me?” I asked when the pressure inside me became too much to bear.
Marco, who stood by a mirror taking in the bruises on his face from the fight, answered in a hoarse voice. “No, I don’t hate you.”
“But you aren’t talking to me.”
With a slow turn of his body, he looked at me. “My head is so fucked up right now, I don’t know what to say.”
“What did you give as an excuse to leave the tournament?”
“I didn’t, I just left.”
“They’ll be wondering, though.”
Marco looked away. “I’ll have to make up a lie. I guess being around you, that shit is infectious.”
That stung. “I’m not trying to destroy your life. You know that, right? I mean, I’m not asking anything of you.”
Marco sighed and gave a small nod before coming to sit down beside me. “I know, Shelly, and that’s what worries me. You don’t need me the way I need you.”
“You need me?” My eyes widened.
With his eyes fixed on my knee, he radiated tension. “I’m well aware you can go back and join some family unit with our child, but I would be left out and it scares me. I checked in with some friends on my way back from the tournament and it looks like I’m pretty screwed. As an Nman I have no rights if you go back to the Motherlands to have our child. I would need a visa to visit and even if I was willing to move there, I couldn’t without your consent.”
“Marco, you’re overthinking this. My only concern at the moment is how mad you’re going to b
e at me when there’s no child and you realize you left the tournament for nothing.”
“Yeah, well, I guess we’ll know in ten hours.” He got up from the sofa. “I’m sore from the fight and I could use a shower. You’re welcome to sleep in my bed. I can take the couch if you need me to.”
“No, it’s fine. We can share the bed.” I bit my lip. “I promise I won’t touch you.”
Marco moved away from me too fast for me to see the expression on his face. “We have an appointment with the doctor at eight a.m. sharp,” he said over his shoulder. “He should be able to determine if we’re having a child or not.”
CHAPTER 19
Taking the Test
Shelly
Marco tossed and turned a lot that night. I know, because I didn’t sleep much either.
At eight o’clock we met with a doctor who was in his early thirties and clean-shaven.
“Don’t look so shocked,” he said and smiled. “It was my wife’s birthday yesterday and at the top of her wish list was a week with me clean-shaven. I know I look stupid, but my wife really wanted to see what I looked like without my beard, so we had a good laugh about it.”
“You must really love her,” Marco replied with a smile and nudged me a little forward. “This is my wife. And of course, you know why we’re here.”
The doctor smiled. “Yes, and being newlywed myself, I understand the excitement. It can be hard to wait for the answer when we all so urgently want to start a family.”
I raised an eyebrow, looking at Marco. He stepped closer to me, placing his arm around my shoulder.
“That’s right; it’s just come a little sooner than we expected, so we don’t have all the practical details figured out yet.”
“I understand,” the kind doctor said and gave me a smile. “My name is Robert and I’m honored to have you as my patient.”
“Thank you. I’m Shelly. Shelly Summers.”
His eyes expanded. “Like the genius?”
“Yeah, but my wife isn’t actually her. They just share the same name,” Marco said before I had a chance to talk.
“Don’t worry, I didn’t actually think you were her. I’ve seen interviews and documentaries with the real Shelly Summers.” The doctor chuckled. “Not that you’re not real, of course. It’s just so impressive to see someone so gifted.”
