by Tui Allen
~~~
‘Look at the spirit lights of those parents!’ said Sister Sterne. ‘Surely they will provide this baby with the genes for the task.’
‘Spirit lights?’ I said. ‘What are you talking about Sister? We’re looking at physical bodies, surely.’
She sighed. ‘With respect Father, we are deities – it’s possible to train our immortal eyes to see and assess the light of any spirit, whether or not it is under life sentence. Focus with the ultra-vision of your divine inner eye on the female Pearl swimming before us now; try to locate her spirit-light and tell me what you see.’
‘Can’t see a thing except a shapely-looking dolphin body. Beautiful colour isn’t she? Iridescent, like the sea-jewel she’s named for.’
‘For a dolphin of Pearl’s nature, Father Clement,’ she insisted, ‘focus near the heart. After a while you get the feeling for where each character type is most likely to display its light.’
I focused again and to my surprise I did see a glimmering there.
‘Hmmm, perhaps you’re right. I fail to see how it tells me anything though.’
‘Can you see our problem spirit there within her also?’
‘Yes, I suppose so. Its looks much as it did before you sentenced it; faint and tired.’
‘Now observe the male, Rigel, who is fathering our problem spirit in its new life. He carries his light in the upper brain, just above and forward of centre. Can you find it?’
‘Vaguely.’
‘Now compare his with our mother dolphin. Can you see the difference? His light is so powerful, so physical, so focused. Hers is a softer light, calm and multi-directional. But can you sense the will they both share?’
I saw the lights and I supposed there were differences between them. It seemed too slight a signal to base a whole new life upon, but Sterne was so absorbed by her light-readings, she deserved some encouragement.
‘Sister Sterne, I am far from convinced of the worth of this method of yours, but if this spirit lives up to your assessment, I’ll recommend your skill to the Sacred Council for closer analysis. It could help your advancement in the Divine Hierarchy.’
Sterne’s aura expanded suddenly with uncharacteristic warmth, emitting great streamers of magenta light into the space surrounding her.
‘Thank-you Father! I would be honoured to be recommended by a deity of your standing.’
I sighed with concern for the spirits of the mortal creatures frolicking before us, while the soft dusk deepened to night across their ocean and the starlight glimmered on the waves of their home.
But let us forget for now, the ambitions of deities and focus again on the Azurans whose story resumes a few months later . . .
~~~
Inside Pearl the baby woke and began to think. The first thought was a question.
Where is it?
Then came a command from herself to herself.
Listen!
The baby listened to her own beating heart and her mother’s. She heard another sound, a sudden rush out and in, from her mother’s body. It only happened now and then. The baby did not understand that sound and she puzzled over it.
There was another kind of rushing; something big, outside and around all the time.
Is there liquid out there? Is my mother jumping and playing in liquid, just as I do here inside her?
My mother is thinking of me again. Listen! I can hear her thoughts. She is soothing me. I am safe. I am warm. How great she must be to carry me here inside her. I must think my love to her as she thinks hers to me.
Again and again the baby commanded herself to listen. She sometimes felt her mother sending thoughts out away from her. The marvellous thoughts went on their way and she wondered what they meant.
Are there others like her out there? Others, who she sends them to? Listen! I can hear some of them. Their sounds show me that they are the same shape as me, but bigger, like my mother.
The baby heard sounds coming from every direction and she spent all her waking hours trying to work out what each one meant.
One day she heard a wild high cry from high up in the world outside.
Are there others out there who are different from us?
‘Mother. Mother. Can you hear me?’
‘Yes my baby. I can hear you.’
‘What makes that crying sound?’
Pearl saw the tern calling as it flew above. She thought-streamed the picture inwards to her baby.
A pretty creature, thought the baby. I like the sound it makes.
But where are the sounds I am waiting for? Are they in here or out there? Listen! Listen!
~~~
Over the next few weeks, thoughts, questions, and pictures passed between Pearl and her baby in an increasing stream. Pearl did all she could to help the child make sense of her new existence. She was a ‘mind’ mother, more interested in what was in the child’s mind than in its physical self. Most dolphins could communicate efficiently at birth, but few with the fluency of Pearl’s children.
~~~
It was about this time that Sister Sterne and I noticed the presence of seraphim in unusual numbers. Something seemed to be attracting them to the Solar System of Koru. I found this strange since I didn’t recall their having any presence or interest in Sol or Koru during my previous sojourns there. Sterne regarded them forbiddingly whenever they dared enter her presence. She tended to discourage the annoying familiarity for which these ‘groupies of The Hereafter’ were notorious.
~~~
‘What am I?’ asked the baby one day when Pearl was swimming up the windward side of a large wave in a storm. A group of seraphim surrounded her – their transparent energy fields clearly visible to us, though no dolphin would see them.
‘You’re a baby dolphin.’
‘What is a dolphin?’
‘A being of the oceans of the planet Azure.’
‘Oceans? What is that?’
‘Water. Just like the water you are swimming in now. But oceans are vast, deep, blue, clear, and beautiful.’
I understand ‘vast’ I think. Deep too. Beautiful maybe, but . . . ‘Blue? Clear? What is that?’
‘You’ll understand when you are born.’
‘What is being born?’
‘When you come out to live in the big world out here.’
‘I will go out there?’
‘You will,’
‘What’s it like out there?’
Pearl watched the wind sweep the tops from the waves, pulverize them in the air and fling them across the surface in boiling streaks.
‘You can swim as far as you want and never reach the end.’
‘I want to be born now!’
Not far off, in deeper water, Pearl sensed the stealthy movement of a hunting shark.
‘You’d die before you swam two body-lengths if you were born now, especially in this storm. The world out here is dangerous for a baby, especially one that’s been born too soon.’
A few weeks later Pearl received the message again.
‘Mother, I need to be born as soon as I can.’
‘You can’t be born until you are ready, so you must be patient.’
A deliciously stupid mackerel cruised past her nose. She reached for it lazily. This would be an easy catch.
‘But Mother I need to find something. Can I just pop out for a minute?’
Pearl missed the mackerel.
‘No dear. It doesn’t work that way.’
Her next target wasn’t quite so stupid, but she eventually caught it, stunned it with a well-placed bite to the head, deftly turned it in her mouth so that it would slide down easily and swallowed, savouring the oily richness of the meat.
By this stage of her pregnancy, an older female relative called Breeze constantly shadowed her for support. Breeze and Pearl shared in the delicacies surrounding them.
‘The baby seems restless. Breeze, can you check on it please?’
Breeze scanned Pearl’s womb. ‘It’s twisti
ng and turning a bit.’
‘What’s the matter baby?’
‘I’m trying to find something.’
‘What on Azure could you be seeking?’
‘I don’t know what it is. I don’t know where it is. But I have to get out of here so I can find it!’
Pearl felt the baby thrashing.
Breeze sent soothing brainwaves to calm the child. It helped, and Pearl called upon Breeze often after that to calm the searching baby who couldn’t wait to be born.
~~~
Weeks passed.
‘Mother, am I male or female?’ Pearl and her daughter Echo received this question together.
‘We don’t know yet but Breeze will know very soon. I think you’re a female and perhaps one day you will be a mother like me.’
‘I hope so. I want to be just like you.’
‘Do you know your older brother and your sisters, my baby?’
‘I know about Aroha and Rev because you think of them so much. I know Echo because she is always with you and she is watching me now.’
‘And is Echo your favourite sister?’
‘Yes. She will be my friend forever.’
Pearl and Echo laughed.
‘Now rest and sleep,’ Pearl soothed. ‘We must hunt. Then I can eat so you can grow.’
Pearl, Echo and the other dolphins of the school continued hunting and feeding, while the baby rested at last.
~~~
A few days later, Pearl, Breeze and Echo, swam west together through a narrow strait between two islands. Pearl noticed Breeze studying her womb.
As though aware of Breeze’s scrutiny, the baby asked, ‘Mother, does Breeze know if I am a girl yet?’
Breeze herself answered, ‘Yes, I am sure now that you’re a girl,’
‘I’m a girl! Just like my mum.’
All the dolphins including the baby, cavorted in celebration.
‘My little sister.’ said Echo, ‘Look at you – stop bouncing around in there. You’ll make my mother sore.’
‘What’s more important is that you are healthy and of fine size and shape,’ said Breeze.
Pearl was well satisfied with all of Breeze’s information. The three dolphins emerged at the western end of the strait and veered left to head down the western side of the southern island.
‘What name shall you give me, Mother?’
‘I’ll give you the name that seems to suit you when I see you swimming for the first time.’
~~~
The weeks passed and the little female grew.
‘Mother, Mother! Once I was able to move and swim about but now I can hardly roll over. I feel trapped.’
‘You’re growing so quickly you are filling up the space I have to hold you. That’s good. It means you will be born soon and be as free as the birds in the sky. This is your time to rest, grow, and be patient’
‘But mother, what’s it like to be born?’
‘It may be a little frightening, but it’s worth it.’
‘I want it so much, but I’m afraid too.’
Next day, Pearl and Breeze imparted the information the baby would need to survive the coming ordeal.
‘There are things you must know about the world,’ said Pearl. ‘It has both air and water. You’ll be born underwater but you must quickly find the air and learn to breathe. Breeze will help you. Can you feel the little hole on the top of your head? That’s your blowhole. Exercise it. Play with the muscles surrounding it so when you reach the air for the first time you’ll know what to do. It’ll feel very strange at first. Air will rush in and out your blowhole, whenever you ask it to. You can breathe out anywhere but air can only come in when your blowhole is up above the surface.’
‘What’s the surface, Mother?’
‘It’s the place where the air meets the water; a beautiful shining expanse.’
‘I think I can hear it.’
‘That is very likely. Now listen carefully. I have instructions for your birth. You’ll be born tail first. Once your tail is out, it may take a long time for the rest of you to be free. I’ll go on swimming as usual. The moment you feel your whole body is free, you must swim up to the air and take your first breath. Breeze and Echo will be there in case you need help.’
Breeze explained.
‘When you are born, swim up towards the light. It’s at the surface too, just like the air.’
‘What’s light, Breeze?’
‘It’s hard to say, because it’s silent. Light will seem powerful and huge. It’s much stronger above the surface. But you must swim towards it, even if it hurts your eyes.’
‘I hope I haven’t forgotten how to swim. It’s so cramped in here.’
‘Not long now my little one,’ Pearl re-assured her. There was silence from the baby. Then one more question.
‘Breeze, what are my eyes?’
‘Rub your head against your mother and you’ll feel two little bumps, one on either side of your head. The light will dazzle them at first. You might need to keep them half closed until they get used to it, especially if it’s sunny.’
‘Thank-you Breeze, I’ll try to remember everything.’
‘Don’t worry, little one – I’ll help if you forget. Do what we tell you at the time, and all will be well.’
Whatever it is, wherever it is, I’ll find it, once I am born. I know I will.
~~~
Read on, or if desired . . .
Return to Table of Contents
Chapter 3: Searching
Pearl’s contractions started two days later, one cool and sunny morning. Rev, Breeze, Aroha, and Echo, swam near for extra protection. The baby’s tail soon appeared. Breeze swam closest to Pearl to observe and reassure the baby, and communicate with Pearl as required.
‘Echo,’ said Breeze, ‘Can you do lookout duties please? Let us know about any sharks or predators the blood might attract.’
‘Can’t Rev do that? I want to see the birth!’
‘Rev, do you mind?’ asked Breeze.
‘Any shark that comes in range will feel my rostrum re-arranging his insides.’
‘Just make sure you let the school know before you take it on single-beaked!’ his mother warned.
‘Alright, I’ll tell them . . . if it’s a big one.’
‘Rev! Do as you’re told!’
Breeze watched carefully throughout the entire birth, checking on distress levels of mother and baby. Pearl pushed hard into the final contraction and the baby arrived in a cloud of blood. Breeze, shadowed by Echo, was ready to provide any assistance the newborn might need. But, to everyone’s delight, this baby needed little help, her tiny flexible body undulating to the surface as naturally as the ripples that spread on a calm sea when a fish leaps. So Pearl named her new baby ‘Ripple’.
~~~
Ripple gasped as the air rushed into her lungs. So this was air! A thunderbolt to body and brain. She scanned the world by vision and sonar; looking, listening, searching. The cold clawed at her.
There’s too much air. Too much water. Too much space. Too much light.
It must be here somewhere . . .
‘Where is it, Mother?’ she said.
‘Where is what?’
‘Perhaps I left it behind in the warm. Can I go back and find it?’
‘You can’t go back, dear.’
They swam on, the adults guiding Ripple to keep her near the surface.
‘Now breathe again,’ Pearl ordered.
‘I already breathed!’
‘It’s time for your second breath.’
‘Must I?’
‘You must,’
‘Pouuff! There, I did it. I’ll never get used to that.’
‘You will – I promise.’
Ripple was already swimming smoothly in her mother’s slipstream like a tiny living shadow of the adult. By now the cold was digging its way towards her innermost organs. Pearl injected the first milk into her mouth. Magical! It drenched her with warmth. The icy needles mello
wed into cool caresses.
For the first hour or two Pearl and Breeze patiently reminded her to return to the surface and breathe regularly, until she’d accustomed herself to this strange new task and made it a regular habit.
Soon, she was recovered enough to start enjoying her freedom.
This was a world worth seeing. The space, the light, the blue and white sky! It was beyond anything she could have imagined before she was born. After the first shock of it she quickly learned to appreciate the air pouring into her eager lungs. She loved the cool softness of the sea enclosing her; the warmth of Pearl’s rich milk, sliding thick and cheesy down her throat; and the colours of the dolphins glowing in rainbows against the one intense colour that gave the whole world its name.
And the movement! The freedom! The beautiful sounds! With such stimulation, Ripple’s race to learn accelerated like the wind of a rising gale.
But why can’t I find what I am looking for? It’s everywhere around me. I’m certain of it.
~~~
There was much to frighten her in the outside world: a sudden shadow from a cloud passing over the sun, a noise she did not yet understand, the first glimpse of an unfamiliar creature such as a large ray.
‘Whistling whitecaps!’ she would say and cling closer to her mother’s side.
‘Jellyfish!’ Echo teased, when she noticed Ripple taking fright at every new sound and shadow.
‘She is a jumpy one,’ agreed Breeze.
~~~
But what if I die before I find it?
Was that it? No, it was a gust of wind breathing on the ocean.
What about that one? No, it was that bird; his wingtips brushed the face of the wind.
Some huge booming thing, deep down in the sea. Is that what I seek?
‘Echo, can you hear that booming? What is it?’
‘It’s the heartbeat of a blue whale, Ripple, but he’s far away.’ Echo thoughtstreamed a picture of him to Ripple.
‘What’s he doing?’
‘Eating krill by the million.’
He’s magnificent, thought Ripple, but he’s not what I’m looking for.
It hums in every atom of this beautiful world, but still I cannot find it.
