by Bella Andre
“Thank you for bringing me here today.” She held his face in her hands, even more mesmerized by him than she had been the first time she’d set eyes on him. “It was exactly what I needed.” Her side was aching a little bit after all the exertion, but it was nothing compared to the pain she’d felt when she collapsed on the stairs. “You’re exactly what I need.”
No question about it—she had already won the biggest prize of all.
* * *
“I had the best time today!” Maddie greeted them at the door with a tray of brownies that smelled so good Taylor’s mouth instantly began to water. She’d never been a huge one for sweets, but she couldn’t resist taking a brownie as she said profuse thanks to Justin’s sister for stepping in to run her B&B while they were out. Still warm from the oven, the brownie melted on her tongue.
“You’re a magician in the kitchen,” Taylor said to Maddie. Moaned it, actually. “I’ve been making cookies—”
“Great cookies,” Justin chimed in.
“—but my baked goods are nothing compared to this.” An idea came to her. “I know how busy you are already, but if there was any chance that you would consider baking for me every now and again, that would be amazing.”
“I’d love to!” Maddie looked even happier now. “How much would you need? How often? And would you just want brownies or cookies and scones and cakes? I could make madeleines and macarons, if you want more of a French flavor.”
“I want all of it,” Taylor said, loving Maddie’s enthusiasm. “How about once a week to start? Then more if I manage to get my idea for an afternoon tea off the ground in a few months.” She was still on too much of a high from their grape-stomping adventure to let in dark thoughts about what her health might be like in a few months—and what impact that might have on her business. “And I’ll bet once some of the locals taste your treats, the stores around here will want some too.”
“Why did you ever leave her and go to Germany?” Maddie asked Justin, with an elbow to his gut.
“Because I was an idiot,” he said.
“We both were.” Taylor put her hand into Justin’s in case his sister didn’t already know that they were together now.
Of course, word traveled fast in the Morrison family, and Maddie’s eyes were twinkling as she said, “Drew told me the good news. You two are perfect together. I’m so happy for you.”
“Thanks, I’m really happy too.” Taylor knew she was beaming, especially when Justin gave her a kiss in front of his sister. “If you two don’t mind holding the fort for a few more minutes, I’ll go wash off and get changed.”
She was pretty sure the grape stains on her skin weren’t going to scrub off completely any time soon, but that was okay. She liked looking down and remembering how fun it had been to stomp grapes with Justin today. For a little while at least, she’d felt free and normal, like there was nothing wrong with her whatsoever.
* * *
“Drew told me about Taylor’s diagnosis,” Maddie said once Taylor had gone out to her cottage. “I looked up some stuff online, but you know I’ve never had much of a science brain, so I was having a hard time wrapping my head around it. In plain English, how bad is it?”
Justin appreciated Maddie waiting to ask her questions until Taylor had left. It wasn’t that he intended to keep this conversation from her—it was more that he didn’t want anything to bring her down. It had been so good to see her laugh and relax and let go of her worries for a couple of hours. He still hoped that she would come with him to meet the local donor tomorrow and hear what the woman had to say, but until then, he planned to do whatever he could to keep Taylor’s mind off it.
In clear and simple terms, he explained Taylor’s diagnosis. Unfortunately, the more he told Maddie, the more his sister’s face fell. “But she’ll be okay, won’t she? If you give her your kidney?”
“First, I have to be a match.”
“You will be.” Maddie looked just as determined as he felt.
“When I am,” he said with a small smile, “kidney transplants can work really well.”
“All the time?”
“Most of the time.”
“And when a transplant doesn’t work well?”
He shook his head, unable to let himself go there. He was a scientist, but that didn’t mean he believed in trusting only lab results. He’d read enough studies over the years to understand that science alone couldn’t account for one hundred percent of healing. Hope, faith, and love were also extremely important.
“I love her, Maddie. I’ll do anything for her. I won’t let anything happen to her.”
His sister didn’t ask any more questions, just put her arms around him and held on tight. It wasn’t the first time they’d held each other this way—they’d needed each other just as much six years before, when their mother had gotten sick, then passed away.
“Make sure she knows we’re all here for her, okay?”
For a few moments, he didn’t think he could trust his voice. “Thanks again for stepping in today. You’ve already helped more than you know. Not just so that we could do the blood tests and meet with the doctors, but because she needed an afternoon in the sunshine most of all.”
Maddie gripped his hands and squeezed them, before getting up. “I should probably go before Taylor comes back. Otherwise, I’ll start crying and ruin the fun grape-stomping vibe you guys had going on.” She went into the kitchen for her bag, then came out and gave Justin another hug. “Tell her to call me anytime. For any reason. And let her know that I love her. We all do.”
After walking his sister out to her car, Justin went upstairs to change his grape-stained clothes before Taylor’s guests came back from sightseeing and wine tasting to partake of afternoon tea and brownies.
By the time Taylor returned from her cottage and brought in the tea, the parlor was full of happy, slightly sunburned tourists—adults and children alike stuffing themselves full of Maddie’s brownies. Taylor put her arm around him.
“You’re a natural with my guests. Especially,” she said as she looked down at his fresh pair of jeans, already smudged with chocolate from where he’d been playing Lego with the kids in the corner, “with the littlest ones.”
Another vision hit him, clear and vibrant, of Taylor pregnant and glowing with a child of their own. The first of many—he wanted their kids to grow up in the kind of loud, boisterous family that he’d so loved being a part of.
But he knew better than to say anything about his vision. Not because he was afraid she wouldn’t feel the same way, but because he didn’t want his dreams for their future to send her spiraling into worries about whether they could ever come to pass.
He knew they would.
Faith, hope, love—he would hold on to those, and to her, no matter what.
* * *
The Belmonts invited Taylor and Justin to dinner for their last evening in town, and they had a great meal at a Thai restaurant just up the valley in Calistoga. He loved having her all to himself, but he also loved watching her captivate everyone around her the way she’d always captivated him.
After they returned and said good night to her guests, they walked back through the moonlight to her cottage, arm in arm.
“I know it’s really hard to pull up roots and put them somewhere new,” she said, “but I really hope Katie and Brent and their kids end up deciding to move here.”
“I’d be pretty surprised if they don’t.” Though he’d been with Taylor in St. Helena for only three nights, it already felt like coming home. He could have lived happily with her anywhere—in a desert or a jungle or smack-dab in the middle of suburbia—but there was something special about Napa Valley. Not only because of its picturesque vineyards and wineries, but also because after only a few days, he had seen firsthand how supportive and welcoming the community was. St. Helena was the perfect town to raise a family in, to watch kids’ soccer games on weekend mornings, then play in the pool all afternoon. “This place is pretty hard to resist.”
“Are you sure?” She stopped just inside her front door to face him. “Are you really ready to give up your life in Frankfurt and move here? I would never expect you to do that, especially this quickly. No one would.”
“I’ve never been more sure.” But this wasn’t just about him, so he had to ask, even if the answer might not be the one he wanted to hear. “What about you? Earlier today, you said I was moving too fast.” He stroked her cheek, needing to touch her. “Do you want me to move here? Do you want me with you? Or do you need some space, some time?”
“Of course I want you here with me,” she said, sending a massive rush of relief coursing through him. “But what if you resent me one day for asking you to drop everything in your life and turn on a dime?”
“The only thing I’d resent is getting on an airplane on Monday to fly five thousand miles from the woman I love. I don’t want to tell you I love you over Skype. I want to hold you in my arms when I say it.” He was glad to see a small smile appear on her lips as he lowered his mouth to hers. When he was barely a breath away, he said, “I love you.”
Their kiss was full of passion—and so much love it humbled him.
“You haven’t gotten the grape juice off,” she said as she ran her tongue over his collarbone. “Why don’t I help you with that?”
Without waiting for his reply, she began stripping away his clothes, pulling his T-shirt over his head, then unzipping and shoving his jeans to the floor. Utterly mesmerized by her, before he knew it, she had her own clothes off and then was taking his hand in hers to lead him into the shower.
She turned the water on, then sat him down on the tiled seat at the far end. The warm spray rushed over her skin, rivulets of water streaming over her breasts and stomach as she picked up the soap and lathered up her hands.
Gently, with her palms moving across his skin, she ran soap bubbles over him. First over his face and neck, then down his shoulders and arms. Lifting his hands, she placed them on her stomach as she re-lathered with the soap, then worked on rubbing each finger with the bubbles, one at a time, to wash away the last traces of grape juice.
He loved the care she took with him. He could feel more than desire in her touch—he could feel her love for him in every stroke, every caress, as she made her way down his chest, his stomach muscles jumping beneath the light brush of her fingertips. By the time she started running her hands over his thighs, he didn’t think he could handle much more. If she kept touching him like this, he was going to lose it long before he got a chance to reciprocate by lathering up her skin the same way.
“It’s your turn now,” he said, but when he got up to change places with her, she put her hand on his chest and gently pushed him back.
“It is my turn,” she agreed, “but I don’t need you to clean me up right now. I need you to fill me up.”
He groaned at her deliciously filthy words as she reached for one of the condoms that they’d decided to keep stashed in the shower.
Slowly, perfectly, she lowered herself over him, and even as pleasure shot higher and higher, taking them both over the edge together, relief was there too.
Relief that after all these years, her heart was his—and his was hers.
Relief that she had allowed him to take her to the transplant center for the tests and was considering letting him help her.
Relief that she seemed so vibrant and healthy today, despite everything he’d read on her doctors’ reports.
Making love with Taylor—and holding her close—was exactly what he needed tonight. All day he’d wanted to be strong for her. He’d wanted to make sure she laughed, rather than cried. He’d wanted her to focus on hopes rather than fears.
But the truth was that by this time of night, pretending he wasn’t scared took a hell of a toll on him.
Burying his face against her chest, he let water from the shower cover the tears he suddenly couldn’t hold back. And all the while, Taylor held him just as tightly.
Knowing it would be the very best way to build up their reserves of strength, after drying each other off with plush white towels, they slid together beneath the covers and kept on holding each other tight until morning.
CHAPTER FOURTEEN
As they headed through her garden the next morning, Taylor felt a million times better than she had twenty-four hours ago on their way to the transplant center. All because of Justin, who had made sure to keep them busy enough all afternoon that for once, while her worries still lingered in the background, they hadn’t been front and center.
He was so good for her. She’d always known it, but in college, she had been too scared of rejection—and stepping outside of her comfort zone—to try for being more than just his friend. Even earlier this week, if he hadn’t boldly taken her in his arms and tempted her to stop hiding from her desires, she likely would have wimped out.
Thankfully, as they walked up the back steps, then opened the kitchen door, she didn’t need to worry about that anymore. All those wasted years with her ex were nothing more than a lukewarm memory.
At least, she’d thought the past was firmly in the past…until she saw who was sitting in her kitchen drinking a cup of coffee.
“Bruce?” She blinked hard once, then again. Surely she couldn’t be seeing what she thought she was seeing.
Her ex-boyfriend got up, his arms wide as though to hug her, then he stopped short as Justin came inside, the door slamming behind him.
“What are you doing here?” Justin’s words were more growled than spoken.
Taylor had an instinctive urge to hold her arms out wide too, to block the two men from going after each other. Bruce had never been a particularly physical guy, but she’d never seen this kind of jealousy in his eyes either.
As for Justin, she could feel the heat of his fury behind her without turning to look.
“Your mother called me,” Bruce said. “She told me what you’ve been going through. She said you needed me.” He spoke as though Justin wasn’t in the room, focusing only on her. “I took a red-eye to be here for you, baby.”
“She isn’t your baby.” Justin sounded even less civil now, if that was possible. He took a step forward, but she put her hand on his chest.
“Justin.” She had to say his name a second time to get him to look at her. “I’ll deal with this.”
She could see his indecision, knew he wanted to throw her ex out the door personally. But she also knew he trusted her not only to be able to deal with her ex, but also to know that she’d made the right choice in choosing him over Bruce.
At last, he said, “I’ll be just outside if you need me.”
“Thank you.”
But he wouldn’t let her go that fast, not without a kiss, one so possessive it should have made the feminist inside her protest. Instead, she went utterly weak in the knees, glad to be his, to know that he didn’t just possess her, she possessed him too. In every way—mind, body, heart, soul.
He gave Bruce a look of warning as he passed him in the kitchen, one that promised swift and painful retribution if he hurt her in any way. She appreciated how badly Justin wanted to protect her, but she knew firsthand that Bruce was harmless.
“It’s nice to see you,” she said in as calm a voice as she could muster given what a huge and not particularly welcome surprise he was. “But I’m afraid I don’t understand why you felt you needed to come all the way out here.”
“I still love you, Taylor.” Her eyes widened. It wasn’t like Bruce to be so direct—he’d always tended to meander around whatever it was he was trying to say. “I had no idea you were facing such health struggles. To think that you might d—” His words crumbled in a choked-up throat.
“Everything is going to be okay,” she said, rolling out her trusty mantra as she put her hand on his shoulder to guide him back to the stool. She was still irritated with him, but she couldn’t help feeling sorry for him too. “I’ll fill your cup and get you something to eat. That will make you feel better.”
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br /> “You’ve got to give me another chance, baby.”
Gritting her teeth at the fact that he obviously didn’t know when to quit, she said, “Stop calling me baby.”
“You always loved it when I called you that.” He scowled over his shoulder at the direction in which Justin had gone. “Before him.”
No, she hadn’t loved it. Bruce calling her baby had made her feel like they were stuck in a fifties-era relationship where he was supposed to bring home the bacon and she was supposed to fry it up in a pan. After making sure the kids were bathed and in bed, of course, by the time he got home from his stressful job in a world far beyond her little homestead. It almost made her laugh as she realized that he did, in fact, have quite a high-powered job in banking, having risen quickly through the ranks in Rochester, and she was frying up quite a bit of bacon these days for her guests.
In any case, as she’d said to Justin a few days earlier, Bruce wasn’t a bad guy. He just wasn’t for her.
There was no point in hurting him further, so she didn’t correct his erroneous assumption. She simply topped up his coffee and started scrambling eggs. She’d skip the bacon today.
“Your B&B is nice, Taylor.”
She could see that he meant it, but his compliment didn’t mean nearly as much to her as Justin’s had when she’d given him the tour on his first day. Perhaps she should be gracious and offer Bruce a tour as well, but she wasn’t feeling particularly gracious at the moment.
“Thank you.” And then, since he’d made the effort of flying all the way out here, she asked, “How is everything going for you in Rochester? How’s your job? Your family?” She made sure to look pointedly at him as she added, “Your girlfriend?” Her mother had slipped up on the phone a few weeks back and mentioned that he was dating someone. Taylor had been nothing but happy for Bruce. After all, he hadn’t only wasted her years—she’d also wasted his.
“She’s nothing to me. Not like you are.”
Taylor fought the urge to roll her eyes. “Seriously, Bruce, you don’t need to say that.”
