“I’m going to Riley’s,” I tell him, even though he didn’t ask. “I’m spending the night.” I hold up my backpack as proof.
Gordon nods in acknowledgment, then goes back to staring at the TV.
“I’ll be back tomorrow, if anyone cares.” I hesitate, giving him one last chance to tell me not to leave. Not because I don’t want to go, but because his indifference makes me feel like someone just punched me in the stomach. But nobody says anything. So I leave.
Chapter 18
“PARK PLACE, WITH TWO hotels on it.” I hold my hand out to Tasha, one of Kat’s suitemates. “Pay up.”
“Not again,” she mutters, counting out her Monopoly money.
“I also accept properties if you don’t have the cash. I’m flexible like that.”
She glances over at her property cards, then sorts through her bills again.
There are six of us playing: me, Kat, Tasha, Jordan, some girl named June, and Cameron. He’s the one Kat told me about, the one who wasn’t going to ski because he makes things warm all the time. What she didn’t mention is that his last name is actually Frost, which I think is kind of an important detail, what with it being so ironic. A couple of guys—Nathan and Blake—are playing video games on the couch and slowly finishing off the last of the pizza. Liv’s in her room with Tristan, of all people, because he’s apparently her boyfriend now. Ugh. And how convenient that he’s going out with someone who lives with Kat, so he can be over all the time. He glared at me when I first got here, his mouth twisting up in a sneer, but then he gave me a half-assed shrug and said, “Hey.”
Which was weird, because he hates my guts and I hate his, and I could tell he wasn’t exactly happy that I’d shown up. But maybe he’s actually, like, respecting the fact that Kat chose me and not him. Or maybe he really has moved on and doesn’t care about our feud anymore. I find either of those options hard to believe—he obviously still hates me and he seems like the type to hold a grudge—but whatever.
Tasha finally pays up, handing over almost all of her money. I’ve got piles of it, all four railroads, the electric company, several high-end properties, including Park Place and Boardwalk, plus a few others of varying value. All of them have at least one hotel. It’s too bad this game isn’t played with real money, because I’m totally killing it.
“Ugh,” Jordon says, stretching his arms behind his back. “Can we just admit that you won and stop playing?”
Kat shakes her head, grinning. “Don’t give in to him. We’ll never hear the end of it.”
“I just don’t see the point of going back and forth for a couple more hours when we already know how it’s going to end.”
“We don’t know that,” June says. “Not for sure.” But she looks down at her three property cards and meager stack of cash and doesn’t look too convinced.
Cameron throws his cards in the middle of the board. “I’m out. Jordan’s right—there’s no point. Besides, if we’re going to watch another movie”—he checks the time on his phone and yawns—“we should do it now.”
“We’re waiting for Liv.” Tasha glances over toward the bedrooms. “She said she wanted to watch it.”
“I think she’s kind of busy.”
“Someone go knock,” June says, her voice hushed, as if she’s afraid Liv might hear her from the other room.
No one volunteers.
Kat gets out her phone. “I’ll text her. And if she doesn’t answer, we’ll watch it without her.”
Tasha starts putting away all the Monopoly pieces. Cameron holds his hand out to me. “Good game.”
“Thanks.” I shake with him. He doesn’t hesitate or flinch or anything. Like he’s not even considering the fact that I could electrocute him. Like he trusts that I’m not some evil psychopath out to get him.
And his hand is really warm.
It’s refreshing. The trusting me thing, I mean—not the warm hand thing. It’s also a relief. Nobody here tonight has looked at me like I’m the scum of the earth, or like I shouldn’t exist. Like I don’t deserve to. And I know it shouldn’t feel weird to be treated like a real person, but a weight lifts from my chest that I didn’t even know was there.
Cameron wanders over to the couch and tells the guys he’ll play winner if there’s time. Kat’s texting furiously with Liv, which probably means Liv’s skipping the movie.
Tasha finishes putting the game back in the box and shoves the lid on. “This goes on the top shelf.” She glances between me and Jordan. “One of you boys gets to put it away, because I can’t reach.”
Jordan wiggles his eyebrows at her. “Get Nathan to lift you up.”
“Shut up!” She smacks him on the arm and then glances over to the couch real quick, where Nathan’s playing video games. He doesn’t look like he heard.
June comes and stands next to me. She looks really nervous, and I figure she’s about to say something unpleasant, like that being half hero makes me not good enough for Kat or how dare I show up for this party and kick ass at Monopoly when everyone knows I’m that traitor who goes to Heroesworth. She doesn’t seem like the type to say something like that, but I can’t think of what else it would be.
“Hey, um, Damien?”
For someone about to tell me off, she doesn’t sound too sure of herself. Maybe she just wants to see the X on my thumb but thinks it’s rude to ask. I decide now’s as good a time as any to go find the bathroom and avoid this situation altogether. I’m about to make an excuse to leave when she says, “I just wanted to thank you.”
“I don’t— Wait, what?” My mind races, trying to come up with what I did that’s worth thanking me for. “You wanted me to obliterate you in Monopoly?”
Her cheeks turn a little red and she sucks in a deep breath before launching into her explanation. “I know it couldn’t have been easy for you, because Katie says you live with your dad, and he’s a... you know. Hero. A famous one, and everybody’s always watching you. So I know it was probably really hard for you to say all that stuff. But...” Her voice gets tight and her bottom lip trembles a little. “My mom wasn’t in that video, but she got taken by the League last year. For being out at night and ‘looking suspicious.’ That’s what they said, anyway. She has telepathy. That’s her power, but it only works on heroes, and I think they knew that. Like they’d been studying her or something. They wanted—” She breaks off all of a sudden, her eyes going wide, like she just realized where she was and who she was talking to. “I’m sorry. You probably don’t want to hear about it. You’re, like, famous.”
I swallow. Me, too famous to talk to her. Like her mom getting abducted by the League is too small potatoes to even listen to. “What did they do to her?”
“They were afraid she’d use her powers on them. She’d never done anything before—she’s a veterinarian. She didn’t even go to Vilmore. But they thought that even if she wasn’t planning to spy on heroes, other villains might get her to help them, or that maybe they already had. Of course my mom wouldn’t do that. She’d been approached before and said no. But the heroes didn’t care. She could hear their thoughts, and she knew they were too scared of her to let her go.” June’s quiet for a few breaths, and I can tell it’s hard for her to keep going. “They falsified reports that said she’d tried to attack them, that she’d pulled out a raygun when they approached her on the street ‘just to talk.’ That’s how they justified bringing her in, at least on paper. Then they tortured her, to find out what she knew about them already.”
“Did she...?” I can’t bring myself to ask if she escaped, or if something worse happened.
“She got away. She’s okay now. Mostly.” June clenches her fists and looks up at me. “But I wanted to thank you. For standing up for us. It means a lot, especially since everyone knows who you are. My mom cried when she saw that broadcast, exposing what heroes really do. So, just... thanks.” She looks embarrassed, like she’s taken up too much of my time.
“Yeah,” I tell her, trying not to loo
k as stunned as I feel. “No problem.”
Me and Kat don’t even make it halfway through the second movie before sneaking off together. Kat loves zombie movies, but she loves me more, and when she pinches my arm and turns her head toward her room, I squeeze her hand in silent approval. We slink away down the hall, and I’m already kissing her and running my hands under her shirt when she presses her door closed and locks it behind us. It’s only been a couple weeks since we last did this, but after everything that’s happened between then and now, it feels more like months.
The lightning bolt on my high-voltage T-shirt glows bright in the dark. It looks really cool, and I almost hate to take it off.
Almost.
Kat unbuttons my jeans and I unhook her bra. We practically tear the rest of our clothes off, and then we have sex in her bed. It’s a little bit weird that there are so many people just down the hall, and that they all must know what we’re doing in here. But it could be hours before they leave, so I decide I don’t care.
Afterward, we just lie there for a while, because neither of us has to go anywhere or answer to anyone. I can’t remember the last time we got to do that. Even when I stayed over for her birthday, I had to scramble to get to school the next day. And whenever we’re at my house, well, we usually only have a small window of time.
Now that I think about it, maybe it’s never been like this.
Kat rests her head on my chest and drapes her arm over me. I can feel her breathing, in and out, her breath warm on my skin. And it’s really stupid, but I think this might be the best moment of my life.
I should have gone on that ski trip with her. We could have had a whole week together like this. And yeah, everyone calls her Katie, and it’s super annoying. But whenever I call her Kat, her friends look at us like I must know something about her they don’t. Like I’m not just her boyfriend, but someone special and important. Which I am, obviously, but it’s cool that they notice.
“I made a mistake,” I whisper.
“No, you did fine,” Kat teases, and I can feel the muscles in her face twitch as she smiles.
“Not tonight. Not this. But, Kat. I think I really screwed up.”
She must hear in my voice that I mean it, because she goes tense. “Damien, what are you talking about?”
It’s more than just the ski trip. I sit up and run my hands through my hair. The peaceful feeling I had is gone, and maybe that’s my fault, maybe I can’t just accept good things when they happen to me, but this is big, and I can’t pretend I’m not thinking it. “I should have gone to Vilmore.”
“You what?”
“Seriously, what the hell was I thinking?”
“Uh, you were thinking that you wanted to be with your family.” Kat reaches past me and turns on the lamp on her nightstand. We both wince at the sudden brightness.
“My family? I bet I could stay here again tomorrow night and Gordon wouldn’t even notice. No one would care if I didn’t come home.”
“That’s so not true.” Kat shivers and grabs her shirt off the floor.
“Okay, maybe not. But it would just be another excuse for them to be pissed at me.”
“Did something happen?”
“You mean, besides everyone thinking I’m some kind of psychopath terrorist because of that video?”
“You meant what you said. And if your family didn’t know you felt that way, then maybe it needed to be said. They’ll get over it.”
“A full-ride scholarship. And I threw it away.” The enormity of that hits me, like it took this long for it to sink in. Or maybe it was because at the time, not taking it sounded like a good idea. It’s only now, when everything’s falling apart, that I’m not so sure. “That was my whole future.”
“Whoa, Damien.” Kat puts her hands on my knees and looks me in the eyes. “It was a future. That doesn’t mean it was the only one.”
“What if it was? I mean, what am I going to do? As a hero?”
“I don’t know. But that’s not the point.”
“If my whole family getting to know me is just going to make them hate me, then I should have stayed away.”
“They love you. It’s obvious they do. And what about your friends?”
“Riley and Zach aren’t allowed to see me anymore. Plus, Riley didn’t even want to be partners with me.” And Kat doesn’t want me hanging out with Sarah. “I just make trouble for them.”
“You think if you went here, you wouldn’t cause any trouble?” She gives me a really skeptical look. “It’s kind of what you do.”
I laugh. Just a little. “I probably wouldn’t cause as much here.”
“Yeah, right. You’d pick fights with every guy who flirts with me, or anyone who says something bad about heroes, because people do. It’s a school for villains, and like it or not, you’re still half hero. And you wanted to go to Heroesworth. You said yourself that going to Vilmore didn’t feel right anymore.”
“I know. And it was true. It is, I mean. I just miss you, Kat. I want you to be part of my future, but we’re going in completely different directions.”
Not just because she’s a villain and I’m trying to be a hero, but because she’s going to actually be successful, and I’m not sure I see that happening for me anymore, no matter what school I go to.
Kat gets quiet. She takes my hand and entwines her fingers with mine. “You know how much I wish we were on the same path. It hurts that we’re not. And I hate that you and Sarah are a thing.”
“We’re not ‘a thing.’”
“You work together.”
“I work with Riley, too.”
“But you haven’t made out with him.”
“That you know of.” I wiggle my eyebrows at her.
She elbows me in the ribs.
“Ow.”
“Riley also didn’t try to kill me.” She sighs. “You know why I can’t stand Sarah. And if you weren’t a hero, if you’d changed your mind and come to Vilmore, we’d be partners. Just the two of us. You’d know all my friends, and we could do our homework together and go to the same dining hall. But, as much as I want that, that doesn’t mean you made the wrong decision.”
“I have to tell you, you’re not really selling me on this. You’re kind of just rubbing it in.”
“My point is, it sucks that we’re apart so much, but we’re making it work. And if you hadn’t stuck it out with your dad, you never would have forgiven yourself. Deep down, you wouldn’t. Especially after what happened with your mom. You need him.”
“Take that back. I don’t need Gordon. I let him give me food and shelter and stuff for his benefit. It makes him feel good about himself, like he’s finally doing the right thing by me.”
“Uh-huh. That’s so what’s going on. And anyway, I meant emotionally.”
“Well, that’s where you’re really wrong, because I don’t.”
She shrugs, not believing that. “He needs you, too. They all do.”
“Sometimes I think me and him are never going to get along. It’s like, things are only good between us if he thinks I’m doing exactly what he wants. He doesn’t listen to me. He doesn’t get me. And just when I think he might be starting to, he says something completely stupid that totally ruins it.”
“Still. Just because it’s not easy doesn’t mean it wasn’t the right choice. I think you know that.”
I lean my head back and let it thunk against the wall. “Maybe. But I can’t take him looking at me like he doesn’t know me, like I’m just some villain exchange student who lives in his house.” It’s been almost a year. I should be more than that to him, even when he’s mad at me.
“Maybe you should tell him that.”
“He doesn’t listen to me, remember?”
“But if you don’t bring it up, then you’re not even giving him a chance. How can he listen when you don’t say anything?”
“Don’t be on his side, Kat.”
“I’m not. I’m on yours. That’s why I think you need to talk
to him.”
Chapter 19
I’M LYING FACE DOWN on the couch Saturday night, flipping channels on the TV. I hate everything that’s on, and it seems like anything I might want to watch doesn’t start for at least twenty minutes.
Amelia suddenly looms in front of me, her phone in one hand. She snaps a picture of me sprawled on the couch with my face smashed into the armrest, then smirks at her screen. “You’re awfully mopey for having been at Riley’s last night.”
“It’s really hard to be away from Zach. You wouldn’t understand.”
Her nostrils flare in and out in outrage. I have a pretty good view of them, what with her standing over me like that. She leans in and whispers way too loudly, “I know you went to see Kat.”
She acts like wanting to see my girlfriend is so scandalous. I point the controller at her and hit the mute button, but of course nothing happens.
“You can’t even go to Zach and Riley’s house anymore. And Kat posted on Facebook that she cried when she said good-bye to you earlier.”
I lift my head at that and prop myself up on one elbow. It was so hard to leave today—I ended up missing the train, twice. We were lying on Kat’s bed, and I had my arms around her, and I kept saying I should go, but I couldn’t bring myself to actually do it. And yeah, there were tears in her eyes when I finally did get up to leave. And when we said good-bye at her door, she threw her arms around me, and we just stood that way for a while. She said she wasn’t crying, but my shirt was wet and her shoulders were shaking and we both knew that really she was.
“Did you cry?” Amelia asks.
“Why do you have to be such a heartless bitch? This is why Zach’s mom doesn’t want him around you.”
“That means you did.” She snickers, like she wasn’t sobbing over not getting to see Zach last night.
“Only because I had to come home to you.” For the record, I didn’t actually cry. But I still felt like complete crap, like every part of me was heavy and empty at the same time.
The Betrayal of Renegade X (Renegade X, Book 3) Page 20
