by Max Lockwood
“Others?” he repeated.
Clara had hoped he wouldn’t catch that, but that he focused on it specifically… she had a feeling he wouldn’t let go until he had the whole story from her. When she thought of it like that, she knew he deserved that much for offering them his home, but she wasn’t ready to just come out with it, either.
“There were others,” she said, voice clipped. “They left.”
“Ah.” Jack nodded like he understood, and he probably did.
It wasn’t exactly a big leap to take.
She glanced over her shoulder when she heard something from inside. Jack didn’t even twitch.
The others were inside already. There was food in the house already, so they didn’t have to take anything from the farm yet. She had waited, and she wasn’t entirely sure why.
But she did know that she wanted to talk to Jack. She wanted to talk to someone, and while Cooper was always there for her, and a lot of the other people in her group would have been just as fine for her to speak to, but…
There was something different about speaking to Jack. For one, there was no overprotectiveness, like with Cooper, that had him trying to comfort her with every word Clara felt… that she needed to have everything out so her heart could calm down.
Besides that, there was also her curiosity. She wanted to know why anyone would so willingly open their house to strangers in these times, especially when they were all armed, and even though they had children with them. He’d easily turned his back on them to lead them to the house, and they could have shot him in the back and taken everything for themselves.
Clara didn’t want to believe it, but she thought some of the guys in her group had even thought about it. If it had been any of the guys that left them behind… she wondered if they would have done it.
Best not to think about it, she decided, and threw it into the corner of her mind where she was letting things better not thought of stay.
“It probably wasn’t easy, but I’m sure you did good out there. I can tell by the group you brought in. And you, right in the front, ready to protect them all. That was really something.”
Clara smiled awkwardly at the praise. She didn’t really think she deserved it. She was just doing her part, considering they were where they were, partly because of decisions that she’d made. Even though it meant they were there, alive, it still counted. But that wasn’t the only thing that had Clara feeling a little uncomfortable.
She wasn’t really the leader of their little group, she just took the position because no one else seemed to want it, and everyone else assumed she was. It was pretty much how her life went, and she was beyond fighting it at this point.
Also, she wanted to thank Jack, but she didn’t know how. The words just wouldn’t come out of her throat, and they ended up standing in silence for several minutes before one of them broke it. Clara was the one that spoke first.
“So,” she said, for lack of a better thing to do. “I really just have to ask here. Why would you even do this? I mean… you don’t know us, but you asked us to come up here with you. Then it turns out that you live alone out here. Was it just pity? Because we didn’t even get that in the last town that we passed through.”
There had to be more than just pity, right? All pity would get them was to take some of the crop and leave after. Or, he might have allowed them to sleep on the edge of the fields, not in his house.
“I have kids,” he started to explain, “but they’ve all grown up and moved away. Even before all this mess started. And my wife died the year before of cancer, so I live all alone.”
Clara understood, then, why he was so quick to invite strangers to his house. Most people, even in normal circumstances, would have just sent them on their way.
“It gets lonely, stuck in the middle of my land and sometimes not seeing another person for days. To be honest with you, I was relieved to see you and your group. Doesn’t mean I wouldn’t have shot you if you gave me a reason to, but I looked at all of you and knew you wouldn’t.”
Clara smiled wryly. She wasn’t sure of that, herself. More like they couldn’t shoot back, because they were trying not to lose anyone in their number, and they were all worried he would have shot at them.
She was glad he hadn't shot at them, but it was a very near thing. If the others had been as alert as she was, they might have gone with the “shoot first, ask later” route. The sad thing about it was, if they had done that and not felt a bit of Jack’s kindness, they might have written him off, and gone on to live in his house and on his land.
Clara was so grateful things ended up the way they had.
After a moment, she sighed. If he could be honest about himself, then she could tell him a little more of what they’d been through. She’d cut a great deal of the details, though, of course.
“We felt just as relieved to see you—we were close to desperation. We started off with a bigger number, had several cars. But then one of them got a flat, the one most of my friends and I were riding in, and, while some of us went out to search for spares, they took off. We were left stranded with little food and nowhere to go. We decided to go through the woods because we couldn’t stay where we were anymore.”
She would have to corner Cooper and thank him for his good judgment. It had been his suggestion to go through the woods, and Clara had been hesitant. The only reason she went that way was because she’d needed an immediate escape, and the other reasons came after.
“So, Jack. How do you look after a field this big on your own?”
He scoffed. “With difficulty. I grow corn in one field, barley in another and parsnips in the third. People have been stealing from the outskirts of the fields, but I can’t man all three fields by myself.”
Clara grimaced. “We were going to steal the food, too,” she admitted. “It’s just been one food crisis after another, and we were all down to scraps just to make it last longer. But I’m happy to work to earn my keep. Just… thank you so much for giving us the chance when so many others wouldn’t.”
If that was all it took, she would do it gladly. She’d never worked on a farm, her grandmother’s gardening came nowhere near the scope of this, but it was something she could do and it would get them all food and a place to stay.
Really, meeting Jack was the best thing that could have happened to them, and she didn’t doubt the others felt the same and would work just as hard as she planned to. There was some lingering shame that this man had caught them about to steal and he was still being this nice to them. Earning her keep was the least she could do.
“You know, I have a good feeling about you,” Jack told her, turning to grin at her. “And you’re very welcome. The house has plenty of bedrooms, where my kids used to sleep, so there’s room for everyone, if you squeeze a little bit.”
“No one would mind a bit of a squeeze,” she reassured him. “Honestly, just about anything beats sleeping on the ground, especially for the little ones.”
He hummed, nodding. “That’s very true. Also, because of my wind turbines and solar panels, there’s also some power for the house, so you all can have hot showers if you wish.”
She almost laughed. Hot showers were a luxury now, one she hadn’t had in months, and the thought of having one immediately was tempting.
It was almost too hard to believe, to be real, that they’d made it here. Just yesterday morning, everything had been going to hell. They had no car, they were far away from home, and their food reserves were all but nonexistent.
She almost died again.
Meeting Jack had truly been a blessing.
Clara was so happy she felt tears come to her eyes. Jack turned to her when he heard her sniffle, and the concerned look he aimed at her only made her want to cry harder. Instead, she laughed through her tears and waved a hand at him, dismissing his concern.
“I apologize for my emotional response,” she said, and went on to explain, “you could say we’ve had a pretty rough few weeks. Not
that long ago we were forced to flee from home, the reason we were out on the road at all was because our town was attacked. There were too many of them for us to do anything, so we grabbed as many people, and as many supplies, as we could and headed out. Then, well, the flat tire and getting screwed over by people we trusted.”
She had to stop for a bit and clear her throat, wiping at the few tears that escaped her eyes, even as she smiled wide. But the smile died pretty quickly.
“And I just lost my grandmother in a shooting. We buried her body in the backyard, and I didn’t want to leave her behind but… I just have to accept that she’s gone. The people you have in your house right now are all my friends and family, and I can’t thank you enough for what you’re doing for all of us.”
Jack gave her a pat on her shoulder, waiting as she tried to get a hold of herself.
“Don’t worry about thanking me, just keep up your end of the deal; protect my crops and keep an old man company from time to time. You’ll be better off on my farm.”
That just brought on a fresh urge to cry, but she held herself back this time as Jack guided her inside. She thanked him several more times, then Cooper was heading her way, looking concerned, probably at her tears, but she waved him off with a smile. Felicia and her sister pulled Jack aside so they could show their own gratitude.
Clara and Cooper headed upstairs.
“I already have Tessa set up in a room, and I gave her something light to eat.”
“Was she not feeling well?” she asked, instantly anxious.
They had traveled through the forest pretty much the whole day yesterday and for most of this morning. But Cooper calmed her down with a shake of his head.
“No, just a little headache, she told me she just needed to lie down.”
Clara nodded and sighed. She still had to worry about Tessa. She would ask Felicia to look at her again, but, for the moment, they all deserved some good rest. Clara was ready to put it above food, even.
“I’m going to have a shower,” she said as she went through the rooms until she found the room she was looking for.
Cooper didn’t say anything, and she didn’t look back, either, as she slid inside and closed the door behind her. Joy hit her again at the thought of having a nice hot shower. Because of the water shortage back home, she didn’t get to bathe as much as she liked, having downgraded to wiping herself down to save even more. There hadn’t been even that since they’d set out on the road.
Clara would have to remember to talk to Jack about his water supply.
She took off her clothes, despairing a moment that she hadn’t thought to come with extras for after her bath, but that wasn’t important. She stood under the shower head and slowly turned on the taps. She felt the water hit her skin, cold, and she stood and waited. To her delight, the water warmed up.
Clara relaxed under the water, reveling in what she had been missing for a while now. She’d never appreciated hot showers before, they’d been simply part of her morning routine. Feeling it now brought the tears back, and Clara broke down in the shower. It was okay, because Cooper wanted her to grieve what she’d lost, and she was alone. The water washed away her tears, so the sobbing and jagged breaths were the only things that gave her away.
Cooper was still outside the door, and it took her a minute to realize he was speaking. He told her repeatedly that she was safe and that everything would be okay.
She began to believe it herself.
Chapter Ten
Clara was woken in the night by a scream.
She shot up in her bed, disoriented for a moment. It was dark, but they weren’t outside, and it took her a second to remember where they were. Cooper still slept beside her, and she winced when she heard the scream again. She recognized it as Tessa’s right away and ran to her room. Thankfully, it was the one next to her own.
She wanted to curse, having forgotten her sister’s penchant for nightmares. Things had been fine while they were on the road, and her biggest problem had been Tessa’s head injury, that she might as well have forgotten all the other problems her sister had. It was her oversight, but hopefully now that things were cooling down, she could pay her sister the attention she deserved. Even better, Felicia and Barbara were with them, so she could go to them for an opinion any time.
Inside her sister’s room, Clara walked hurriedly over to the bed, only to have her hands hover above her sister’s body.
Tessa kept tossing and turning, and Clara worried what she was dreaming about. It was clearly something traumatic, which was to be expected with the events that had happened since they watched their grandmother die in front of them. Anyone was bound to have nightmares after all that, but, for her sister, it was dangerous.
Felicia had taken another look at her head wound, and while it was healing nicely, she had warned that it shouldn’t be aggravated, and Clara felt this fell into that. She couldn’t shake Tessa awake for fear it might hurt her head, but she was moving enough on her own to do it. When her body gave another rough jerk, Clara decided to hell with it and reached for her sister’s arms.
“Tessa,” she called, trying to keep her voice low, remembering others were still sleeping. “Calm down, it’s only a nightmare! Come on, sis, wake up.”
She held Tessa tightly by her shoulders, shaking her as little as possible, hoping she would just react to Clara’s voice and wake up. It was the worst kind of way to wake someone from a nightmare. If anything, she probably just alarmed her more, but the most important thing was to keep her still.
Finally, Tessa woke up with a gasp, and Clara felt her body tense for a moment, different than from when she was in the throes of her nightmares.
“Tess, it’s me,” she said quickly, thinking her sister was building up to a scream.
There was a tense, still silence, then Tessa let out a sound like a sob and scrambled into Clara’s arms. Clara held her sister tightly through her body’s trembling, rubbing her back and carding fingers through her hair. It had been a while since they were in a position like this, and Clara’s heart broke for her sister.
“It’s okay, Tess. Shh… we’re all right. Everything is fine now,” she murmured, and, for the first time in a long while, she felt the words weren’t entirely a lie.
Things were the best they could ever be, as far as she was concerned. They had food and shelter, and they were all together. They’d even have work to keep them busy come morning. She squeezed her arms around her sister, feeling tears sting her eyes as she squeezed them tightly.
“We’re okay, Tess,” she whispered in her sister’s ear. And while Viola wasn’t a part of it with them anymore, Clara thought they could get over it, with time.
Tessa whimpered in her neck, but she calmed down in a few moments. Then her hands grabbed onto Clara’s arms tightly, making Clara wince, and her sister was pushing her away to look up in her face. It was dark, even with the window bare and letting moonlight in, but her eyes had adjusted enough that she could see her sister’s outline.
Not that she even needed to see her sister’s face, because this situation was all too familiar. She had hoped her sister was getting better, but she knew, even before Tessa spoke, that that wasn’t the case at all.
“I had another premonition,” were the first words out of her sister’s mouth.
Clara grimaced, and was glad for the darkness, because then her sister couldn’t see. Of course, they were back to that again. Tessa had gone quiet about her visions and premonitions a while back, and Clara had hoped she’d heard the last of it.
“Tess,” she muttered, apprehensive.
Her sister didn’t seem to notice her tone.
“Just listen! I had another premonition, where Jack’s fields were up in flames and everyone was dying. Clara, this is serious!”
Clara wanted to sigh, but she held back the urge. Tessa’s dreams were always gruesome, or so she’d come to think, so there was nothing strange about her seeing everybody dying. When their neighborhood and
house got attacked, she woke up saying they were all going to die back then, too. But then, a week later, when their attackers came back to steal more from them, Clara and the rest of the neighborhood had been ready, and the worst they received on their end were a couple of people with light injuries.
It hadn’t made sense to Tessa, how they weren’t all dead. She’d even expressed, out loud, that perhaps her dreams were wrong. Clara had hoped that would be the turning point, but clearly it wasn’t enough.
“Where are your pills?” Clara asked.
Barbara had prescribed them for Tessa to stop her nightmares and hopefully start her on the road to recovery. At some point, Tessa had stopped using them, accusing Clara of wanting to stop her visions. And while she wasn’t wrong, she didn’t get the context right, either, thinking Clara only wanted glory for herself.
Since Viola’s death, Tessa had been taking her pills religiously. Clara just stopped checking some time back and hadn’t thought much about it since they left home. But it had been more than a week already, hadn’t it?
“I haven’t had any in a few days—I ran out of them on the road,” Tessa admitted hesitantly.
Clara growled quietly, but not enough that her sister would hear it. Clara didn’t know what to do. She could just let Tessa sleep, if her insomnia didn’t come back because of the constant nightmares, but she knew this kind of night would keep repeating. She didn’t think Barbara had any medication on her besides the painkillers she and Felicia had brought along. But she didn’t really feel like doing anything before morning, either.
“I think you should go back to sleep and we can talk in the morning. I can stay here for a while, if you’d like…”
But Tessa was insistent about her visions, like Clara knew she would be.
“No. This is serious, Clara, I saw…” but her voice trailed off.
Clara knew, even without having to see her face, that it was more because she didn’t want to say the words than anything holding them back. So it must have been something bad. It also probably involved Clara.
