by Penny Dee
And then he would go to prison.
TAYLOR
Getting shot hurt like a bitch. Even if it was through a bulletproof vest. The Kevlar didn’t stop the bullet completely. It rammed into my chest like a goddamn cannon, ripping all the oxygen out of my lungs and making me see a universe of stars as I fell to the floor.
But I was alive.
If I hadn’t been wearing one of the vests I’d stolen from Alex’s house the night Noah and I had fled, I would be dead. Because the bullet hit me in my breastbone, only inches from my heart.
Paralyzed by pain, I lay on the floor and watched as Bull beat into Martel, his powerful fists pounding into his enemy until he looked like a limp, bloody piece of meat. I tried to call out, but I couldn’t breathe. Pain flared in my chest and rattled my lungs. I could see it on Bull’s face, he thought I was mortally wounded. I wanted to tell him I was okay, but I was too stunned to say anything.
When Noah cried out, Bull stopped and let Martel collapse to the floor. Dropping to his knees beside me, his eyes were crazed with grief, his face marred with despair.
I tried to tell him with my eyes that I was alive, that I was okay, but when I moved my mouth nothing came out.
He patted me down desperately. “Did the bullet get the vest?”
I looked up into his anxious eyes. I couldn’t breathe but I nodded to him. He swallowed thickly, and I could see the relief spread across his face. He loosened the vest and pulled it away so he could survey the damage. He pushed my shirt up and relaxed further when he saw the red bruise already forming on my skin. There was no blood. No mortal wound. Relieved, he sat back and caught his breath.
“Is she going to be okay?” Noah cried.
Bull nodded. “Yeah, kid. It’s all over now. You’re both safe.”
“You need to leave,” Bull said.
We were outside, standing in the shadow of a giant oak tree in the garden. Bull had carried me through the house, eager to get Noah away from the carnage inside, and sat me down in a small garden so I could catch my breath.
I glanced over at my brother sitting on the wall of a water fountain at the edge of the driveway.
“What’s going to happen?” I asked. I had gotten my breath back, but it still hurt to speak.
“Caleb is on his way. He’ll take you and Noah home.”
“What about Alex and Martel?”
“I’ll fix it. I’ve already called the sheriff. We’ll work something out.”
“You called the police?”
“He’s been working with the Kings for as long as I can remember. He’ll help us clean up this mess.”
I thought about Alex lying dead in the kitchen.
We were finally free.
But in my quest for freedom, I had found and lost the man I was crazy in love with. It was tough to accept.
Now he looked at me like he didn’t even know me.
His voice was cold and lacked emotion. He stood next to me but felt a world away.
I had lost him.
I thought about last night and how tender he had been with me, and my heart ached, longing to know he still felt the same.
But he didn’t.
I could see it on his face. Hear it in his voice.
“Will you ever be able to forgive me?” I asked before I could stop myself.
He tried to hide it, but his face tightened with inner torment.
“You got what you want, Taylor. You and Noah are free.”
“But what about us? Do you think there’s any chance we—”
He cut me off. “You need to take Noah home and make sure he forgets all about this.”
I wanted to reach for him. To feel his warm skin against mine. To feel his heartbeat against my cheek as he wrapped his strong arms around me.
But those days were gone, and my stomach twisted with the agony of losing him.
“I love you.” The words spilled out in a desperate whisper and Bull’s expression rippled with longing. With agony.
He paused to look at me. “Take care of your brother.”
And with nothing else left to say, he walked away.
TAYLOR
Over the next few days, I hibernated with Noah, desperate to protect him from what he had seen. We talked about it. About what had happened.
Fortunately, he knew very little and never understood the kind of man Alex really was. All he knew was that he spent the night with his godfather, and that his godfather’s business associate had done some terrible things to Bull’s family, and that Alex had helped.
One day, when he was older, he would learn more about what happened. Who Alex was and the things he had done. A bad man who hurt people, who wasn’t the charismatic grandfather he pretended to be.
It also meant he would learn more about me. Who I was. What I had done. But by then, he would have the maturity of mind to understand, and I prayed he would forgive me.
All I could do now was protect him, and hope he had a beautiful childhood.
After a weekend of binging on Netflix and eating junk food, he was itching to go back to school. His world had looked up when Bull had ridden into his life, and he had made a lot of new friends once he had his confidence back and felt accepted by his classmates. Now he couldn’t wait to get back to them. I was astounded by how well-adjusted he was in light of what we’d been through.
Whatever happened between me and the club, I wouldn’t take him away from Destiny. Not now. He was finally settled. He had friends. Went to birthday parties and sleepovers.
Destiny was our home now.
With or without Bull and the Kings of Mayhem.
I didn’t speak to anyone in the days that followed. Chastity rang a few times, but I couldn’t face her or the rest of the club, not until I had everything untangled in my head.
The only person I spoke to was Sheriff Buckman who dropped by so I could answer a few more questions. It was a slam dunk, he said. A clear case of self-defense. I wouldn’t serve any jail time if I testified in the trial of Gimmel Martel. He said he would live out the rest of his days in a jail cell, and his son wouldn’t see the outside of a cell for several decades.
To my surprise, Sheriff Buckman knew what I’d done for Alex. About the paid hits. But he assured me there was no paper trail, no digital footprint or any witnesses to prove any of it. In protecting himself against being associated with any of the killings, Alex had also protected me, to my utter surprise.
“But you know I did them,” I said to him, feeling sick to my stomach. “Why aren’t you arresting me?”
“I can’t prove any of it. This case will be closed within the next few weeks, and you won’t face any prosecution. As far as I’m concerned, you did the world a favor.” He stood up and tucked his notebook into his pocket. “It’s just a pity Bull didn’t take out Martel as well. He doesn’t deserve the oxygen he’s using, and it would’ve saved me a ton of paperwork.”
I knew why Bull didn’t kill Martel.
He did it for Noah.
He knew how damaging it would’ve been for my brother to see it, and my body ached with gratitude. Things could’ve ended up so much worse, but as it was, Noah was fine and would never have to go through life with the vision of seeing Bull end Gimmel Martel’s life.
And I knew what strength it must’ve taken for Bull to let Martel go.
I just wished he’d let me talk to him, to at least thank him.
But he wasn’t taking any of my calls.
We were done.
I realized that now.
And I couldn’t blame him.
I didn’t know what I was walking into when I turned up at the clubhouse the following Monday. I’d finally spoken to Chastity the night before when she called to make sure I was okay. Ruger had told her everything. When I asked her if anyone else knew, she chuckled softly.
“Oh, honey, MC gossip is faster than lightning. They all knew the very next day.”
Which was exactly what I didn’t want.
“From what Ruger sa
id, there seems to be a weird understanding among the boys about what you did. Once he explained the situation to them, they understood you were caught between a rock and a hard place. They get it. They’d die for each other. And they’re not even bonded by blood.” She sighed. “This world of ours is strange.”
“Have you heard from Bull?” I asked softly.
She paused. “No. Ruger said he disappeared into his office and told anyone who came close to fuck off. That’s my uncle. He retreats like a wounded animal when he’s hurt. But that’s only because he cares so much and he doesn’t know what to do with it. You have to remember, he hasn’t loved anyone in almost two decades. Now he’s in love with you and…. Well, it didn’t turn out how he imagined.”
I couldn’t swallow because guilt knotted in my throat. There was also a hardness in my gut.
“Chastity?”
“Yeah, honey?”
“Are the girls going to hate me?” I didn’t need people to like me. But I wanted them to. Because I’d never had friends like I had with the queens.
The line was silent as Chastity thought for a moment.
“Show up tomorrow. Own it.” She paused. “Just don’t run, okay?”
I had no intention of running. Those days were over.
I was going to face the shit.
Show some backbone and explain myself.
I barely got a wink of sleep because the events of the day kept replaying in my head, and Chastity’s words kept coming back to haunt me.
He retreats like a wounded animal when he’s hurt.
The words swam in and out my nightmares, bringing a sharp, searing pain with them every single time.
By the time I turned up at the clubhouse the next day, I was in knots.
I walked in cautiously, and Randy greeted me with a sharp whistle. “Girl, you’ve got some lady balls on you, that’s for sure,” he said, throwing the hand towel over his shoulder.
I shoved my hands in my shorts and let out a rough exhale. “Should I leave?”
He leaned on the bar. “You kidding me? This place is going to be crawling with sweaty, thirsty biker brothers in an hour, who else is going to help me keep them in line?” He gave me a wink. Apart from Chastity, apparently, I had one other friend in the club.
Relieved, I smiled, and he threw the towel at me. “But there’s a few people I think you need to talk to before you start.”
He nodded toward the booth on the other side of the bar. The queens were here.
“Why do I feel like I’m walking the plank?” I asked nervously.
“Probably because you came here to assassinate their president, and they know it?”
I gave him a wry smile. “Thanks for the awesome pep talk.”
I approached the table cautiously. They were all here. Indy. Honey. Cassidy. Chastity. Autumn. Even Ronnie. When I reached them, the talking around the table stopped, and six sets of eyes focused on me.
“Y’all know what happened?”
“Yep,” Honey replied.
I looked at each set of eyes and saw the questions there. The sense of betrayal.
“Before I explain myself, I want you to know that I was always real with you guys. That hanging out with you was the first time in a real long time that I felt like I belonged. Your friendships mean the world to me, and I hope that you’ll give me the chance to explain.” Their silence was deafening, so I continued headfirst into my apology, hoping they would forgive me. “I have a pretty unusual past—”
“Oh, honey, everyone at this table has an unusual past.” Indy’s dark eyes found mine as she spoke.
“I know, but where I come from…”
Who was I kidding? These ladies weren’t going to forgive me. I was ordered to eliminate their president. Their uncle. Their brother. Their king of Kings.
I gave her a pointed look.
“I killed people for a living,” I said bluntly.
A strange vibe settled across the table.
“Yeah, that probably wins,” Honey said, looking uneasy.
“They were bad people. Drug dealers. Gunrunners. But people, nonetheless.” I looked around the table. “But I was never going to hurt Bull.”
“But you did,” Indy said. “Just not with a bullet.”
“And if I could change that…please believe me, I would.”
“You came into our world to spy on my brother,” Ronnie said. “Then you start dating him. Tell me, when exactly did you decide you weren’t going to kill him? Before or after you made him fall in love with you?”
Ronnie was going to be tough to crack. She was fiercely protective of her brother.
“I didn’t know what my godfather had planned when I came here. I thought it was for surveillance only.” The mention of Bull being in love with me made my heart burn with regret. I could still feel his lips against mine as he moaned it into my mouth during our last night together. “Please understand, I only agreed to come here so Noah and I could stop running. It’s all I’ve ever wanted. I never came here to hurt anyone.”
“I’ve heard about enough,” Ronnie said, dragging her handbag off the table and standing up so she was eye-level with me. Close up, she was fierce. Stepping even closer, her eyes narrowed, blazing with contempt. “My advice to you is to stay the fuck away from me. Do you hear me? I might not be some ruthless, gun-toting gunslinger like you, but I’m as badass as they come, and the only reason you’re still standing here now is because my dumbass brother told me if I laid a finger on you he’d—”
“Ronnie!” Bull’s voice broke into her outburst, and I swung around to look in the direction of his voice. I hadn’t heard him walk in, but there he was, standing with Ruger only yards away, and I realized he must’ve been here the whole time.
Seeing him tightened the thick knot of regret in my chest. He looked so big and strong, but utterly damaged.
Because of me.
“She saved my life.”
His words rippled between us.
“And that’s the only reason she’s not flat on her ass,” Ronnie seethed. “Traitorous bitch!”
“Ronnie…” Bull warned, again.
But her words flowed over me like water and I barely registered them. Because seeing Bull was like a punch in my gut, and I was trembling inside. I ached to go to him, to feel his arms around me, to kiss him until the pain was gone from his heart and he loved me again. But as we stood there, I could tell the gulf between us was wide—almost too wide to cross. His gaze found mine and his chiseled jaw tightened. While all I could do was stare.
“Stay out of my way, traitor.”
I turned back to Ronnie, barely aware of what she’d said. Because I was too numb to worry about her. When she walked away, I turned back to Bull. Our eyes locked, and my throat tightened with a cold ache. He wore an unreadable mask. But I could see the turbulence in his eyes. When he turned and walked away, it was too much.
I went after him, down the hallway leading to his office. I called out, but he ignored me until we were alone in the very room where he’d given me some of the best sex of my life.
Fuck me on your desk.
“We need to talk,” I said, my voice shaky.
I watched him take a packed backpack from the couch and place it on top of his desk.
“Doesn’t seem to be much left to talk about,” he said, refusing to look at me as he packed a few things into the backpack.
He wasn’t going to make this easy. But I got it. After all, in the MC world a cold shoulder was rare. I was lucky I didn’t have a bullet in my skull. I knew the Kings of Mayhem would never harm a woman because it went against everything they valued. But I could be the exception, given my betrayal.
“I can’t help who I was in the past,” I said. “And you know I had no choice about moving to Destiny.”
He opened the top drawer to his desk and removed a notebook, putting it in the breast pocket of his cut. “I do.”
“But do you believe that I would never have tried to hurt you
.”
“Yes.”
“Then why won’t you look at me, dammit?” I choked out, my chin quivering.
He looked at me, and when his eyes met mine, they were ice cold. “We’ve been together three months, Taylor. You had three months to tell me!”
“But I couldn’t. And you know why I couldn’t.”
He shook his head and zipped up his backpack. “It would’ve been nice to know that the woman I was in love with was a cold-blooded killer.”
“So, it’s okay for you to have killed bad people? But not me? Is that why you don’t love me anymore? Because I used to be a hired killer?” I trembled with heartache; my throat tight with emotion. “You told me once, that there was nothing I could say that would change your feelings for me. Is this you telling me you were wrong?”
His barely contained restraint broke, and his backpack fell to the floor with a thud. He stalked toward me, his eyes blazing. A deadly combination of fury and heartache burning off him as he stood over me.
“I couldn’t care less how many men you’ve killed. You and me, we don’t live in the real world. Ours is full of darkness and evil, and you do what you gotta do to survive.” He moved just an inch closer, but it was enough for me to see his racing pulse pounding in the vein in his neck. “Except lie to the man you’re supposed to fucking be in love with.”
He was so close and I was intoxicated by his heat. I wanted to reach out and touch him. I felt breathless and dizzy, my own pulse roaring in my ears.
“I am in love with you,” I whispered.
He stepped back as if my words burned him.
“Sorry, lady, but you have one hell of a way of showing it.” He picked up his backpack and threw it over his shoulder.
“Where are you going?” I was terrified I was never going to see him again.
“Away.”
“Are you coming back?”
He glared at me. “Unlike some people, I don’t get to fucking run away from my problems. I’m the king of fucking kings remember. I have an MC to run.”
“Then, when will you be back?”
“When I’m ready.”
I started to cry. “Please—”
