Her head flung back, back arched, and she came, mouth opened, soundlessly screaming. Reid was right behind her, just as consumed by bliss. Her body had tightened and convulsed around him, undulating and taking him closer to falling off the edge. He pounded into her, over and over again. His thighs trembled, skin filled with prickled and tightened. Reid stiffened over her with a shout, his movements slowed down but he continued thrusting, not wanting to stop.
Soaked in sweat, happily exhausted, they fell to the couch, and wrapped in each other’s’ arms, they drifted into a dreamless sleep.
***
With a yawn, Aria woke up and looked at the clock, and saw they had been asleep for three hours. She gave Reid a gentle shove and he woke up, then smiled at her.
“Good morning, pretty.”
Aria laughed. “It’s not morning. It’s not even midnight. Should we go out? Some of the girls were going to the bar tonight.”
Reid squirmed as if he was nervous about something, and Aria picked up on it right away. “What? What’s wrong?”
“I can’t go out. I actually need to go home soon. We need to talk, Aria.”
Aria sat up and pulled a blanket off the couch down on to her shoulders, covering herself up. “What’s going on, Reid? Just tell me.”
“I called the college today and told them I was withdrawing my acceptance. I officially signed up for basic training with the Army.”
Aria jumped to her feet, a combination of rage and sadness and confusion coursing through her veins. She didn’t know what she was feeling, but she knew she was about to start screaming.
“How could you do that? How could you do it without talking to me first? What is wrong with you, Reid? How could you be so selfish? So thoughtless?”
Reid didn’t move, or even look like he was going to argue. He just sat there, his head dropped, as if he had already prepared for everything that was about to happen.
“Say something, Reid! Anything! When are you leaving?”
He didn’t look up, and Aria knew something worse was just around the corner. “Reid, when are you leaving?”
“Tomorrow,” he whispered.
Aria started screaming in words so garbled and angry, they didn’t even sound like English. She just kept shouting curses and random words until she basically tuckered herself out and collapsed on the couch in a heap of furious exhaustion. Once she was finally done, Reid took a deep breath and let it out slowly.
“Aria, I don’t want to leave you. I love you and you know that. But I’m not cut out for college. I’m not smart enough. I don’t want to go and fail out. I wouldn’t be able to live with that. This is a better option. My whole family was in the military and you knew that. It was something that I was born to do. We’re not breaking up. That’s never going to happen. But I have to do this. For me, and for you. It will be better in the long run, I promise you that.”
Aria’s shoulders slumped. She couldn’t argue with him anymore, because his reasoning was sound. Reid had never been the best student, and had only gotten into IU on a track scholarship. He would have had to work twice as hard as everyone else just to keep up, and it would have been miserable for him. It was also true that his entire family was in the military. Every time she had met Reid’s father, he would always comment on how Reid would follow in his footsteps of the army. As much as he hated this, she knew that this is what Reid was always meant to do. But she couldn’t bear the thought of them being apart.
“I’m going to miss you, Reid,” she whispered.
“I’m going to miss you too. But nothing is going to change, Aria. I promise you. Nothing. Is. Going. To. Change.”
Aria looked deep in Reid’s eyes searching for any scrap of proof that he was telling the truth.
All she could do was hope that he was right.
Chapter 2
Reid
2017, Colorado
“Reid! Did you eat my leftovers again, man? What did I tell you about staying out of my food?”
Cash was yelling at Reid from the kitchen of the lodge, and Reid just rolled his eyes. “I didn’t touch your damn leftovers. Why don’t you go scream at Kurt or Declan? They’re the ones who can’t stop stuffing their faces.”
As the youngest, and newest, bear shifter in the Colorado Clan, Reid tended to get blamed for anything that went wrong at the lodge, even if it wasn’t his fault. He’d gotten used to it, but it was still annoying. Though lately it seemed to grate more on his nerves. Especially because he was feeling the twinges of not having a mate, which had been a big deal in the clan lately. It seemed like all of the guys were finding their mates, even Cash, who was a surly asshole most of the time.
Reid couldn’t help but laugh as he remembered how insane Cash had become before he found his mate. It had become so bad, Cash had attacked him. Everything was fine now and they were buds, but Reid hoped he would never get to that point where he would lose control completely. He was happy for Cash. Especially when he saw how blissful Cash and Lani were now. Reid wasn’t sure he would ever be that happy again. He wasn’t sure he could ever be as happy as he was with Aria.
His Aria.
He grumbled as walked through the compound out to the backyard, where pieces of the fence were still being repaired after Declan went crazy during his mate frenzy. Reid wasn’t in the middle of a mate frenzy or anything, but every time he thought about Aria, he got a little… manic? Depressed? He didn’t know what to call it, but there were days when it consumed him.
Reid thought about one of the last times he and Aria were together, at the Indiana State Fair, before he left for the Army. They’d had such an amazing day, riding the roller coasters, eating a hundred different fried foods and desserts, and playing games on the midway. He’d won her a giant panda bear stuffed animal, and they’d spent the rest of the night on the Ferris wheel, making out under the full moon. It had been the perfect night, and Reid thought about it a lot.
Especially when he’d undergone the transformation operation that turned him into a bear shifter.
The truth was, Reid had never really wanted to join the military, but it had felt like the only option. His father had been in the Army, and his father before him. Reid was a legacy, and his dad had been grooming him since he was young to follow in his footsteps. He’d only applied to Indiana University to make Aria and his mother happy; there had never been any chance he’d attend. When Reid’s mother had found out he was leaving for the Army, she’d been more furious than Aria. Tony, Reid’s dad, had died in active combat, and she swore that Reid would enlist over her dead body. He’d done so without telling her, and left that morning without saying goodbye. Nothing about his decision made him happy, but he knew it was the only option for him, and at the end of the day, it was his decision alone.
He’d just left basic training, one of the top performing recruits, when he was drafted into an “experimental drill program” in another state. When he’d arrived at the facility, expecting to be put through some sort of rigorous exercise program or learn a new tech system, he’d instead been offered the chance to be turned into a super soldier. Reid hadn’t entirely understood what he was being offered, and accepted without thinking. The next thing he knew…
He was a shifter.
He was a damn bear shifter, and he was drifting in and out of a form he didn’t remotely understand. Everything about it was a confusing mess of emotions and energy, making him feel powerful and terrified and vicious and vital all the same time. He relished the power that came from being a bear shifter, and hated it at the same time. Given how much it scared him, he couldn’t even begin to imagine how it would make Aria feel.
They had been exchanging letters the whole time he’d been gone, and they’d vowed to try and keep things the same. But something had distinctly changed between them as soon as he had left, and it had been getting steadily worse the longer he was gone. Deep down he knew he was the one to blame. Had he just told her about his decision, rather than keeping her in the dark
things may have turned out better. Before long, their letters were shorter, with less detail, and less love. And then, Reid underwent the procedure.
He couldn’t see the point of putting Aria through that. Of trying to convince her to love a monster. So, rather than try to explain, he just stopped answering her letters. She kept writing him, and her letters were sad at first, full of confusion and hesitation. Then they became angry, bitter, and lonely. He still carried her last letter with him everywhere he went, tucked in his back pocket.
Reid,
I don’t know why you disappeared. I don’t care anymore. You broke my heart. The one thing you promised you would never do.
You broke a lot of promises, and I will never forgive you for that. How could you be so cruel? You were the love of my life. Now it’s all over.
This isn’t how I wanted things to end. I never wanted things to end. But you have made it perfectly clear you did.
Don’t ever contact me again. We are done.
~Aria
Every time he read it, and he read it a lot, it broke his heart all over again. He hadn’t wanted things to end the way they did, but Aria deserved so much better than him. Than what he’d become. He knew she was better off without him, and the letter reminded him of that. Reminded him that the choices he had made were for the best, regardless of how they made him feel now. Aria had never signed up for any of this, and it wasn’t fair to ask her to change her life.
But he still thought about her all the time.
Reid made his way to the common room, where Declan was watching TV and drinking a beer, enjoying the temporary quiet he was afforded by everyone else being occupied. Reid plopped down on the couch across from him, and let out a long, dramatic sigh. Declan laughed and turned off the TV.
“Is something on your mind? You’re being a little subtle so I couldn’t tell.”
Reid groaned. “Are you happy, Declan?”
Declan turned to Reid with a surprised look on his face. “What the hell kind of question is that? Of course, I’m happy. Why wouldn’t I be happy?”
“No, what I mean is… Are you happy with Blair? Do you feel like you made the right decision by taking a mate?” he asked, as he leaned forward, letting his curiosity guide the conversation. Declan looked at him with total confusion.
“I don’t understand. What was my alternative? Going feral and not being with the love of my life?”
Reid shook his head. “I get that. I just mean… I don’t know what I mean. I guess I’m just starting to feel like something is missing from my life, and I don’t know if it’s a mate, or just a partnership, or something more. I have no idea what I’m talking about.”
“Well, Reid,” Declan says with a knowing smile, “you never go on more than one date with any woman. You spend most nights wandering around the lodge. And you carry that beat up old love letter around in your pocket like it’s the only thing keeping you tethered to the ground. So, forgive me for saying so, but I don’t think you’re doing a lot to help your situation.”
Reid snorted. “It’s not a love letter. Quite the opposite, actually.”
“Be that as it may. You seem to have kind of an anchor around your heart, and you’re never going to find love if you don’t let it go.”
“When did you become a philosopher?” Reid asked with a laugh.
“Blame Blair. She makes me watch these romance movies. Some of them aren’t bad. Anyway. You have no one to blame but yourself, brother. You need to do something to make a change. No one will do it for you.”
Reid flopped back on to the couch with another sigh. “So… Bear Ridge worked out for you, huh?”
Declan chuckled. “You could say that. But not in the way they meant it to. They do this match program thing, but Blair wasn’t even one of my matches. I just saw her and knew. I can’t promise it will work for you, but it’s better than sitting around moping every damn night.”
Reid threw his head back on the cushion of the couch, but hit the wall instead, and cursed. Declan laughed and shook his head. “You’re not going to solve your problems by beating yourself senseless.”
“Do you think Kurt would let me go?”
“Why wouldn’t he let you go?”
Reid raised an eyebrow. “Do you think Kurt would pay for me to go?”
“Never know until you ask. I think he’d prefer to shell out a little money and get you settled than risk you doing what Cash and I did.”
Reid crossed his arms over his chest and pondered.
Could this really be the answer?
Chapter 3
Aria
2017, Morrisville, Indiana
“I said goodnight!” Aria said as she slammed the door on her date. He had tried to push inside even after she told him to take a hike, and she was about to kick him in the knee just for good measure. This was her third horrible date in a week, but this guy easily took the “Garbage Human Being” award. He lived with his grandmother in a trailer, “forgot” his wallet when they got to dinner, tried to drag Aria to a movie that she would have had to pay for too, then attempt to force her to kiss him when he walked her back to her door.
Dating had never really been Aria’s thing, but a fellow teacher from her school had convinced her to try one of those dating/hookup apps since it was summer, and her schedule was more flexible. Everything thus far had been a huge, miserable disaster. Each guy was worse than the last, thinking that just because they’d swiped right on her, she was obligated to have sex with them. First of all, she wasn’t obligated to do anything with anyone, regardless of what they did or didn’t do for her. And second, not one guy she’d met so far had measured up to him.
To Reid.
She hated that every guy she came into contact with paled in comparison with her first love. But it was just a fact. Not a single man in her crappy little town came close to understanding her the way he did, or appreciating her, or loving her. No one looked at her the way he did, or touched her, or held her…
As she fell into her bed, she thought back on one of the last times she’d seen Reid before he disappeared into the military. A few days before he’d told her he was leaving, and in one of the rare moment when they hadn’t been fighting, they had gone for a walk down by the lake under an almost-full moon. Reid had laid down a blanket, and they had talked about movies and music, and what they hoped to accomplish in their lives, together. Reid had reached over, and brushed a stray strand of hair from her face, and then kissed her slowly, and softly.
He’d let his tongue trace the edges of her lips, as his hands explored the soft curves of her body. He’d kissed the edge of her jaw, and nibbled gently on her earlobes, sending shivers through her entire body. He’d cared so much about her needs, and her desire, in a way she had never experienced since. Even the memory of his touch made her body alive with need, and on some level, she hated him for that. She didn’t know if she could ever forgive him for just taking that away without a conversation, without talking to her first and helping her understand.
Aria looked down her phone, which was pinging with more matches from the dating app who had swiped right on her, and she threw her phone across the couch in annoyance. She knew that most of the guys who were contacting her were only doing it because of her looks. She still looked almost exactly like she had at eighteen; when parents walked into the classroom where she taught, many thought she was a student from the high school, and not their kids’ kindergarten teacher. Other people thought she looked like an actress, and was “too glamorous” to be a teacher, which she thought was ridiculous. She loved teaching more than anything in the world, and being around kids was her life. But her blonde hair, huge blue eyes, and full lips made her catnip on the dating sites, and she was tired of men seeing her as nothing but a pretty face.
Reid never treated her like that. He would tell her she was beautiful, but he also always told her she smart, and funny, and clever. He never let her think her looks were the only thing that mattered about her, and that
was one of the things she loved most about him. It was yet another reason why no one compared to him, and why she couldn’t let him go even after all these years.
With a frustrated sigh, Aria turned on the TV, hoping to find something to distract her from her misery. She flipped through some channels, stopped on a few movies she’d seen a million times, and eventually settled on a late-night chat show. She was barely paying attention when it switched to the commercials, and after a few boring infomercials, one came on that got her attention.
A smiling, tiny woman with short hair came on the screen, and she was standing in front of a gorgeous tropical paradise. The scene switched between private bungalows, lavish spreads of delicious food, and happy people frolicking on a beach. When she spoke, her voice was high-pitched and perky.
“Hello, future lovers! My name is Ursula, and I am the owner of Bear Ridge Resort! If you are looking for romance, adventure, and a little bit of excitement, look no further than the sandy shores of Bear Ridge, where your heart’s desire is only a plane trip away…”
Aria sat forward on the couch and turned up the volume. The woman kept talking as she walked through a huge, tropically-designed lodge.
“Have you been hitting road blocks in your love life on the mainland? Are you a shifter looking for a lady that loves you, paws and all? Are you a woman who wants a man who can keep you warm on those long cold winter nights? Then look no further than Bear Ridge Resort, a magical tropical paradise where romance blossoms and love blooms! Call and book your visit today, or check out our website for more details!”
Furever Always (Furever Series) Page 35
