Moments later, Grant exited his office with shining eyes. He and Nedra had known each other since high school. They had dated, exclusively their senior year.
His eyes swept over his old flame appreciatively. Clad in a sleeveless, yellow sundress which complemented her rich brown skin tones, she wore her hair in micro braids, held back from her face by a colorful head wrap. The smile he bestowed on her was all male as they exchanged a warm hug.
“It’s so good to see you again, Nedra”
It was the word “Mama” that drew his attention to the small boy standing beside her. A second child stepped into his line of vision.
The children were handsome boys, but he couldn’t help but notice the look of disapproval on their faces as they looked at him. It was clear that they didn’t like the attention he was giving Nedra. The oldest one placed himself between her and Grant, then looked up at him defiantly. Nedra squeezed Colin’s shoulder affectionately, drawing Trevor closer to her side.
“Grant, these are my sons, Colin and Trevor. Boys, this is Mr. Calen. He runs this place.”
As they had been taught, the boys shook Grant’s hand politely, but both pair of eyes continued to challenge him. Grant chuckled, uneasily.
“In all the time your mother has been volunteering here, she didn’t say anything about you having children.”
“My mother can be old fashion. I’m still in the process of adopting them. She thinks if she says anything before its finalized it might bring bad luck.” Nedra shrugged. “What can you do but live with it.”
Grant agreed. “Knowing Reverend Davis, I’m sure you’re right.”
“Maybe you can answer a question for me, Grant. When Mama dropped us off she said that there was something inside of Pride Center that I needed. Do you know what she was talking about?”
He looked puzzled. “I don’t have a clue.”
“Neither do I. She’s been acting strange since we arrived.” She glanced around the impressive structure. “You guys really have something going on here. When do we start the tour?”
Nedra was very impressed with what she saw. Not only were there numerous educational, social, and recreational programs, but an extensive state-of-the-art computer lab that was the center’s showcase. A job training program was its most successful endeavor. It had placed hundreds of young people from the community into well paying jobs. Pride Center was a far cry from the crumbling facility where she had volunteered so many years ago. She mentioned that fact to Grant.
“Yes, this is amazing, isn’t it? We needed a new building, but there was no land available that we could afford around here, and we didn’t want to build outside of the community. Then, about five years ago, we started to get these anonymous checks in the mail, every month. You wouldn’t believe the amounts. They were enough to pay for the renovations, and to build and equip the computer lab. One time we had a forty-passenger bus and two vans delivered to us to transport the kids. All paid for by our mysterious donor.”
“Sounds like you have a guardian angel.”
“No doubt, and the checks are still coming. As a matter of fact, our donor established an endowment in the Center’s name. We’re able to run a lot of our programs off the interest alone.”
“Surely, God is watching over Pride Center.”
Grant nodded in agreement. “Amen to that. How about you, Reverend Davis? I hear through the grapevine that God has been watching over you too. I don’t mean to pry, but I was told that you had some trouble sometime ago, something about your church trying to force you out as pastor. I was never quite sure what it was all about. You know how second hand information can be. Is everything okay?”
A shadow briefly crossed Nedra’s face and then vanished as quickly as it appeared. “Yes, things are going well. Thank goodness, Mama was traveling out of the country when a lot of things happened. It was over by the time she got back. She was worried when she found out about it, but everything turned out fine.”
“I’m glad. So what happened?”
“Well, there was a move to force me to resign as pastor of Mount Peter, but the young people in my church rallied around me and staged a coup at the church to keep me as pastor. People who had been in power for decades didn’t know what hit them. I filed a defamation of character law suit against one of the church members. That worked out too. She settled out of court.”
“So, now you’re back in the pulpit at Mount Peter?”
“No, actually, I resigned from there. Mount Peter has found its way. It’s got a church full of leaders now and it’s strong enough to stand on its own. My job there is done.”
“Then what are your plans? Are you moving back here?” He sounded hopeful.
Nedra smiled at him fondly. “Like I told you on the phone, I’m just here visiting my mother. I’ve taken a new position, about two hours from Oakland, in a town called Seaside, located on the Monterey Peninsula. The nonprofit organization is just getting started, but the position will be challenging. I’ll be working with the children of substance abusers.” Her eyes went to the two boys walking ahead of them. “I’ve seen how devastating the drug culture can be on young lives.”
“You’re a great lady, Reverend Nedra Davis.” Grant stopped at a closed office door. “Well, that’s the end of the tour. You can sign the boys up for the classes in here.”
Nedra read the block letters printed across the painted door: Volunteer Office. “I remember when I used to sit at a desk behind that door.” During their tour she had related to him her stint as a Center volunteer.
“We couldn’t run this Center without people like you and the volunteer on duty. He’s one of our best. He showed up awhile ago and has been tireless in doing whatever we ask him to do. He told us he used to come here when he was young.”
Grant tapped on the door, opened it and stuck his head inside. The office was empty. Papers were scattered on the desk occupying the room, and a radio placed on a file cabinet was playing softly. He glanced at the closed door leading to a second room.
“He must be making copies in the work room.” Grant turned to Nedra. “Take a seat and I’m sure you’ll be helped shortly. Meanwhile, I’ll take the boys down to the basketball court to watch the game. That way you can fill the forms out without interruption.”
“Thank you, Grant.”
As soon as the door closed behind him, the door to the work room opened and the volunteer entered the room.
“Hello, Nedra.”
Her head snapped up. Her heart skipped a beat. It was Sin.
Momentarily, speechless, Nedra’s breath caught in her throat. Tears of joy began to flow. Sin came to her and took her into his arms. She went willingly.
He smothered her hair and face with kisses. “Baby.” Sin’s voice caught in his throat.
“How?” she sobbed. “Why?”
He drew back. “I didn’t mean to scare you. Are you all right?
“I’m fine,” she sniffed, swiping at her tears. “It was just such a shock.”
Looking at his worried face, Nedra found it hard to believe that he was really here. This man had been in her dreams day and night since he left, leaving only a letter behind. In it he told her that he was going away so she could salvage what was left of her life. He blamed himself for the havoc surrounding her, and said that his leaving might shield her from further turmoil.
He mentioned having heard the whispers of the hospital staff and the gossip about them. Not only was her reputation at stake, but she was in danger of losing her position as pastor of Mount Peter. He felt that the cloud of suspicion hanging over his head was dragging her down, and it was breaking his heart. He didn’t intend for her heart to be broken as well.
The final words written in the letter were ones she would never forget his having whispered to her the last time they were together. I will love you forever.
Sin watched the play of emotions dancing across her face. He was struggling with an array of emotions of his own. His body was trembling. His
heartbeat was working overtime. Greedy eyes devoured her as the memory of the last time they made love remained as vivid to him as his departure from her life.
Against his doctor’s advice, he had signed himself out of the hospital telling himself that she had a destiny to fulfill and that he was in her way. As he had done so many times, he sworn to himself that he would never see her again. At the time he actually believed it. What a liar he had been.
Seating her in a chair, he hunkered down in front of her, catching a whiff of her fragrance as he did. He could feel himself harden. All she had to do was exist and he lost control.
“I’m so glad to see you, Nedra.”
Her eyes searched his. How could he be so composed? Seeing him again had nearly been her undoing, but not seeing him over these past few months had been worse.
She exhaled shakily. “You don’t seem as surprised to see me as I am to see you.”
“I’m not. I’ve been waiting for you.”
She tried not to look surprised. He knew she was coming? How could he know? Suddenly, comprehension dawned.
“You’re the something inside here I need, aren’t you?”
Sin looked at her blankly.
Smiling, she thank the Lord for Marva Davis. “God works in mysterious ways.”
Sin gave a long suffering sigh. “Nedra.”
She chuckled. He still didn’t like hearing sermons. She changed tactics.
“Have you been in cahoots with my mother getting me back here to Kansas City?”
“No, Kansas City was her idea. Pride Center was mine. This Center holds a special meaning for me and my connection to you.”
Nedra was confusion. “How so?”
“I’ll explain it to you later. First, I have to tell you what a wonderful mother you have. I see a lot of her in you. Marva and I have become very good friends since I’ve been here, but she still hasn’t gotten me inside her church. I don’t play that.”
They shared a smile before Nedra turned serious.
“I looked for you everywhere, Sinclair. I called your attorney. I drove down to your beach house. So why would you hide from me in my own home town?”
He shrugged. “Sometimes it’s best to hide in plain sight.”
“But I didn’t know you might be here. Mama kept raving about this good-looking volunteer at the Center, but she never mentioned your name. She did say that all the girls were crazy about you though.”
“Is that right? I’m flattered, but there’s only one girl I’m crazy about.” His eyes held hers as the heat emanating between them simmered. “I asked myself a thousand times why I settled in Kansas City. I knew it was crazy to come here, but I didn’t care. All I know is that I needed to be close to the places you had been.”
He grabbed a chair and pulled it up to her so that they were facing each other. “I’ve been miserable, Nedra. Being without you has been hell.” He ran a worshipping finger down her cheek. “I know you’ve got every reason to be angry with me, but at the time I thought leaving would be best for you.”
Nedra recalled the pain of their separation. “You’re right, I was angry and hurt. I read the letter you left and tried to understand your reasons for leaving, but you never gave us a chance to take a stand as a unit. You made a decision that we should have made together. You’ve done that twice, and I don’t expect it to happen again.”
Again! Sin’s heart leaped. There was hope even in her reproach.
“Still, there are things that you need to know about me. You see…”
“Are you about to tell me that you’ve been working as a government informant?”
Sin didn’t appear to react. His expression remained stoic. Anyone who didn’t know him wouldn’t have noticed the flicker of surprise in his eyes. Nedra noticed.
“What would make you say that?” His tone was cautious.
She watched as he shifted in the chair uneasily. Her eyes traveled down the sharp lines of his body, noting that he had regained the weight he lost during his illness. Dressed casually, in a blue denim shirt and matching jeans, he looked so good.
Her eyes slid back up to his face, answering pseudo calm with pseudo calm of her own. “You tell me.”
Their eyes held, telegraphing their mutual desire. Sin was the first to break the spell.
He rubbed his hands across his face. If he could have exorcised her from his heart, from his every waking thought when they were apart he would have, but he couldn’t. They were now at the crossroads. It was time to put the past behind them and all secrets aside.
He exhaled wearily. “So you know. How did you find out?”
“I used reasoning and common sense.” She grinned. “And, of course, I ‘m brilliant at deduction.”
Sin returned her gin. “Go on with your story, Reverend Modest.”
“You remember my friend, Carla, her husband, Jacob—they just got married, by the way—he’s an attorney. I just happened to stop by his office one day to get his advice on a legal matter, and guess who I saw coming out of his boss’ office?”
“I’m scared to ask.”
“Mr. Tyler, remember him?”
Sin remained silent.
“Anyway, Jacob’s boss just happens to be Oakland’s District Attorney. So I asked his secretary who was this Mr. Tyler. She tells me that he’s some high official with the FBI. Now, my girl can talk and from what she told me this man wasn’t a low level street agent. He’s way up there.
“Way up there?” Sin teased.
“Uh huh. I ask myself, why would a high ranking FBI agent come to visit some injured businessman in a hospital, not once, but twice? Could it be that you and he are more than just passing acquaintances? Maybe you’re friends, the kind who are also engaged in some kind of clandestine arrangement. On top of that, this Mr. Tyler had the power to get through hospital security and visit you without a hitch.”
Sin snorted. “Breaking through hospital security, that’s no accomplishment. Colin did that.”
“You got me there. But the secretary told me that this Mr. Tyler—which by the way isn’t his real name—was in town on Federal business. When I questioned Jacob about it, he made the most unusual comment.”
“And what was that?”
“He told me that things aren’t always what they appear to be.”
“Sounds simple enough.”
“Yes, enough to make me suspicious. That evening, I went to the hospital to ask you what was going on, but you were gone.” Her voice softened. “And that broke my heart.”
Sin rose and hankered down before her once again. “I’m sorry, Nedra. The last thing on earth I wanted to do was hurt you. I wanted to protect you in every way.”
“I’m touched by your sincerity, but at this point I need more. I need to hear the truth.”
Sin didn’t hesitate. “My relationship with you was ruining your life in more ways than one, baby. Believe me when I tell you, the drug world can be more vicious than you can imagine. I know that world and that I hate it. Drugs took my mother’s life and the only security I’d ever known.”
Getting to his feet, he paced the floor, his face an anguished mask as he recalled the memory of those days.
“Once I got myself together, I was determined that drugs wouldn’t destroy me. After college I joined the FBI and worked as an undercover agent for years.” He acknowledged Nedra’s surprise at this revelation before continuing. “I did my job well, resigned and then went into business for myself.
I worked hard and made Bayland a success. That drew the attention of some fellow businessmen who approached me with a proposition. They said that they could show me how I could make a fortune, with little risk. When they told me how that could be done, I went to my friend you met from the Bureau and told him what was up. The Bureau asked me to help it catch the big fish, the ones who help support the illegal drug trade in so-called, legitimate ways.”
“You mean like the prominent professionals who were indicted.”
“Yes, the
bankers, business people, attorneys and even judges. The ones who make dirty money look clean by moving it through the system. These are the ones who make the big bucks under the table, but who are rarely arrested.”
“I see. How long have you been an informant?”
“Five years.”
“Five years!” She paused, looking thoughtful. “That means that you started in New York. That was dangerous, Sin. Anything could have happened.”
“I’ve been well trained. Besides, I had nothing to lose—no family, few friends, no lover…”
“Not even faith in the hereafter.” Nedra squeezed his hand. “That’s not living.”
“I thought it was, until you came into my life. You changed everything.” Sitting back down in front of her, he brought her fingers to his lips. “The only time I felt alive was when I was with you.”
Nedra rose from her chair and brought Sin with her. “So prove it.”
He needed no further invitation. Sin kissed her feverishly. From now on there would be no more secrets in his life. With Nedra beside him, sunshine would rule his days.
Forced to part or suffocate, they continued to cling to each other. Sin had another confession to make.
“I use an alias here at the Center because I didn’t want your mother to know who I was at first. But eventually, when they dropped the charges in Oakland, I told her everything and how much I love you. Her advice to me was to marry you.”
Nedra drew back wide-eyed with consternation. “You didn’t tell her everything about us, did you?”
He snorted. “I’m in love, Nedra, not insane. She’d kill me if she knew everything. And you’re the only one outside the authorities who knows about my part in the drug bust.”
“My lips will be sealed, except to you of course.” She gave him a quick kiss to prove her point.
“I like that. Now, I think we should follow your mother’s advice. Don’t you?” He looked at her expectantly. “That is, if you’ll have me.”
Sin planted himself on the desktop and then pulled Nedra to stand between his legs.
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