“I do understand, but it makes us more one sided. You know everything about me,” Mike said, as he ignored Kitt’s question and walked away from the stall. Kitt followed a couple of steps behind him as Mike flipped off the lights in the barn before he said anything more. “Has it always been like this?”
“My whole life.” Kitt looked at Mike, but the dark made it an easier conversation.
“You know, in college, those women threw themselves at you. You were always the gentleman. I couldn’t see how you didn’t take advantage of the situation, but you never did. I don’t know how I didn’t figure that out.”
“I haven’t ever told anyone. You’re the first person I’ve ever said it out loud to.” Kitt followed Mike outside and now they walked aimlessly in front of the barn. No direction, they just walked and talked. They had about the same posture, hands in their pockets, eyes downcast, watching where they walked as they tried to clear the air between them.
“You told Austin.”
“No, I didn’t. He figured it out,” Kitt said, causing Mike to stop and turn to face him.
“No way! How?”
This conversation was much harder to have face to face.
“He said he figured it out from my underwear.” Kitt snorted at the memory of Austin telling him how he’d unraveled the truth. “When the waist band was outside my blue jeans that day I was throwin’ a fit over the fence.” Kitt couldn’t hold the eye contact and kicked the grass patch with his sandal.
“Really?”
“It’s what he said.” Kitt shrugged. There was a long pause before they were back to walking in what seemed like a large circle around the front of the barn and their trucks.
“Austin came out and talked to me this morning. He said it wasn’t just a fuck for him. Is it just a fuck for you?”
“I put the brakes on it after you left.” Kitt came to a stop, giving Mike no choice but to stop too. Kitt never looked up, instead, kept his eyes trained on his now dust covered toes.
“Why?” Mike finally asked defensively. Kitt stalled, it took a minute to form the words, to find the truth and not let another lie slip through his lips. Technically, now that Mike knew the truth, he never had to lie to him again and that was monumental. The honesty of the thought made Kitt suddenly a little emotional. It felt so good to just tell the truth.
“Both you and Kylie caught us. I’ve never been found out before because I keep it all far away from here. At this rate, if we keep going like this, everyone in town will know by the end of the month. I can’t jeopardize things like this right now.” As Kitt spoke, he started walking again. This time Mike didn’t follow.
“I won’t tell, Kitt.” Mike’s voice was reassuring and he stood his ground.
“Thanks,” Kitt replied, and dropped his hands in his pockets.
“How’s Hooch?” The subject change was abrupt, but Kitt knew it was intentional. They’d talked about it, Mike was okay, and they were good.
“Good. Super good. So far, he’s everything we hoped for and Lady’s nurturing, she’s a good little momma. They’re good.”
“I was gonna stop by after I finished tonight,” Mike said.
“It’s all good. Jose’s there. I’m goin’ out there at midnight to check on the little guy, but I think it’s fine. We aren’t really needed around the clock, it’s just precautionary. Doc came by today and gave him a thumbs up.” Kitt turned back to his truck.
“Cool.” Mike was silent for a moment before his voice rang from behind Kitt’s back. “You should go talk to him.”
The words stopped Kitt in his tracks and his heart leapt. “I think we need to give it a rest. I need to apologize, but it needs to chill between us.” Kitt shook his head slightly and started back to his truck.
“Goddamn, Kitt. You spend your entire life alone. He’s a good guy. And, I noticed you seemed happier over the last few weeks, and it doesn’t make me a girl that I noticed. You’re like a brother to me. It’s probably not a bad thing to have someone sharing your life after you’ve been all alone for the majority of it. I get it’s probably hard as hell to allow someone in. There has to be a lot of fear in that, but I still think you should go talk to him. I would if I were you.”
“Is his agent still here?” Kitt asked.
“I think so, but he’s leaving tonight. All this isn’t his thing,” Mike said. Kitt came to a stop at the back of his truck and Mike walked up to him. “How’s the cuttin’?”
“A little behind.”
They stared at one another for a long minute.
“I can come in the morning,” Mike offered.
“Nah, we’ll catch up with Jose back on business. I’ll call you if it gets more behind.”
Mike nodded and climbed into his truck. He started the ignition and rolled his window down.
“You should’ve told me. It wouldn’t have made a difference. You gotta know that, somewhere deep inside you.” Mike put the truck in reverse and drove past Kitt. “Now go talk to him. Bye.”
Kitt watched the taillights of Mike’s truck disappear. The relief was staggering. Now there was just a hole the size of Texas in his heart where Austin was concerned. He ran his fingers through his hair, and then tried to pat it down, knowing he caused it to stand up in every direction. Kitt forced himself to the house. His heart pounded in his chest with every step he took. He deserved nothing less than to have Austin slam the door in his face, but he needed to try to apologize.
As he got to the steps of the front porch, he heard laughter. Austin’s agent was laughing, or at least Kitt assumed it was Seth. Hell, it could have been his own replacement in there laughing with the both of them. Or, even worse, the agent could be his replacement. Anger shot through him at the thought and jealousy took its hold. Part of him wanted to turn and forget making amends. If Austin could be so happy while Kitt suffered beyond reason…yeah, the other part of him won. That part wanted to tear the shit out of whoever Austin laughed with right now. His arm reached up and knocked hard on the door on its own accord.
Seth answered, took a step back and opened the door wider. His eyes narrowed as he looked at Kitt. That look kicked Kitt’s heartbeat up that much more. He clenched his fist thinking how easy it would be to right hook the guy in the open doorway. He could drop Seth straight to his knees. Wouldn’t that send Austin a message about their future? Hell, maybe it would send Austin packing, and Kitt could finally get on with his life.
As Kitt warred within himself, Seth looked over his shoulder toward Austin. The door was open enough to see Austin sitting at the table eating a bowl of cereal. Their eyes collided, and the smile Austin wore left his face. He stood, concern spread across his brow.
“Kitt? What’s wrong?” Austin asked moving toward him.
“I’ll leave you two alone.” Seth darted to the side of Kitt as he looked back at Austin. He made a wide sweep around Kitt and jogged across the porch, taking the steps down to the yard.
Kitt didn’t move from the spot he stood rooted in. He just stood there looking at Austin who stood in front of him. His heart settled, and the aggression of his deep breath turned more to a pant. Austin was about the best looking man Kitt had ever seen. He had no hard edges, he was just smooth and captivating. Kitt’s dick grew hard.
“What’s happened?” Austin asked again.
“Nothing…there’s nothing wrong. I came over and talked to Mike, and I just…” Kitt stopped and stared for one full minute before he continued, “I’m sorry, Austin. I was wrong. Is it too late?”
“You’re angry.” Austin was clearly confused.
“I’m not angry.” Kitt shook his head to affirm his declaration and forced his face to relax.
“Then what’s this?” Austin asked, moving his hand toward Kitt’s stance.
“Nothing, it’s nothing.” Kitt took a step back and breathed in deeply, hoping oxygen would somehow find its way to his brain. He had to get a hold of himself and quick. His eyes searched the dark and spotted Seth a few hundr
ed feet away, walking aimlessly in open pasture.
“There’s nothing between us, but friendship.” Austin came outside to stand behind Kitt. Not close enough to touch, but close enough that Kitt could smell his cologne.
Those were hard words to hear. They said it all and were very clear. His heart fell to his knees and he closed his eyes. He should leave, but didn’t. He’d come this far and wasn’t opposed to begging for a second chance.
“I don’t want just friendship. I want so much more than that. I was wrong to send you away. Are you tellin’ me it’s too late?” Kitt asked, still facing the pasture. His head hung low, his eyes were closed and seconds felt like minutes as he waited for Austin to answer.
“What? No, I mean Seth and I. It’s just friendship between us.”
This time he felt Austin’s breath on his neck. Austin’s body brushed against Kitt’s. It took a full minute for him to understand the words with the way his body reacted to just Austin’s slightest touch. He forced himself to calm down, to register each word Austin spoke. It was only as Austin stepped completely into him that he got what Austin tried to say.
“I miss you, Kitt.” Austin finally turned Kitt around, and they stood chest to chest, both with their hands in their pockets.
“I miss you, too.”
A smile lit Austin’s face, but he didn’t reach out to Kitt.
“I spoke to Mike this morning. He’s not gonna say a word.”
“I was wrong. It was fear talkin’. I’m sorry I hurt you. If I haven’t ruined it, I’d like us to keep going. If I have, just tell me and I’ll leave. At least, I tried.”
“I must not be clear. I’ve had years of communication training, yet, I can’t get through to you. Kitt, yes please, let’s keep going. I want to. I’ve prayed for the last two day that you would come around. If you hadn’t, I couldn’t have waited much longer.” Austin murmured and reached out to wrap an arm around Kitt. “I missed you. I gave Seth my phone to hide so I wouldn’t call you, and he hid it too well. I tore the house apart trying to find it and couldn’t. It’s what he was laughing about when you walked up. I was coming to you tonight. I missed you.”
“Come to my house,” Kitt whispered as Austin brought his lips forward for a soft kiss.
“Oh God, that sounds good.” Austin swiped his tongue forward, turning the kiss aggressive. Kitt met each bold stroke Austin made with one of his own. It had only been two days, but it felt like years since he kissed this man. The thought caused a primal groan to escape. Kitt wanted Austin and wanted him badly. The sooner they made it to his house the better off he would be. Their moment was interrupted by an alarmed yelp.
“There’s something out here with me. On four legs! I can’t fucking decide if staying out here with it is better than getting my ass kicked on the porch!” Seth was walking backward, taking big steps back toward the house. A few yards from the house, he turned and ran up the steps, straight past Kitt and Austin back into the house.
“How the fuck do you do this? Shit, I’m so out of here.” Seth slammed the door and then opened it again, digging a hand in his sweatpants, producing Austin’s cell phone. “It was in my underwear. The one place you would never think to look, ass.”
“Wait! Let’s start this over. Kitt, this is Seth Walker, my agent. And he’s leaving tonight. He doesn’t quite see the wonderment of being out here.” Austin turned in Kitt’s arms to lean back against his body.
“No offense, this place sucks. The bugs are crazy big. Spiders in my fucking bathroom, dust everywhere. It’s a million degrees even in the winter, and slinging cow shit out of the stalls isn’t my idea of a good time!” Seth slammed the door in Austin’s face.
“We’ve been waiting for the cover of night to help keep us hidden. I have a plane ready to take him back to LA. Do you wanna ride with me to Dallas?” Austin asked Kitt while turning back in his arms.
“I have to be at the barn at midnight.” Kitt lifted his hands to cup Austin’s face as he bent in for another soft, lingering kiss. He loved to kiss Austin. This was exactly where Austin needed to be, right here in his arms, kissing him like it mattered.
“It’s probably not the best idea I come there,” Austin said, seconds before he swiped his tongue across Kitt’s bottom lip. Austin rubbed his aroused cock against Kitt’s who jerked at the simple touch. Kitt’s hips involuntarily rolled forward, begging Austin to continue the simple move. Austin smiled into the kiss, but something abruptly changed. Austin’s body tensed, and he stepped back a step, taking Kitt’s hand.
“Come over tomorrow night whenever you can. I’ll be waiting no matter how late it is.” Austin guided Kitt down the steps toward his truck. They walked hand in hand in the moonlight, but Austin kept them about a foot apart. Kitt was desperate to be back in Austin’s world, and he forced Austin closer, wrapping an arm around him.
“I’m really sorry,” Kitt said. Austin’s body stayed tense, and he never broke stride as they headed toward Kitt’s truck.
“I get it. We have to be more careful. It’s my fault. I should’ve stayed away. I just missed you, and then you gave me the best fuck of my life. Kitt, I’m not gonna let you go that easily, but you need to be in this with me. I don’t want to keep going through this every few weeks.” Austin’s words were simple and clear, but his actions were still very specific. He pulled Kitt’s truck door open. Once Kitt got inside, Austin held out a hand, pushing at Kitt’s chest keeping him there as he shut the door. Kitt was so confused as he watched Austin walk around the truck and open the passenger side door, sliding inside.
“You won’t be alone in this—” Kitt began only to be silenced by Austin with a raise of the hand.
“See? I just proved I’m learning. I wanted to drop to my knees on the porch, but instead, I walked all the way to your truck before I went down on you.” Austin grinned, cocking his brow as he spoke. His aggressive actions were directly the opposite of the words he so casually spoke. He slid across the seat, lifting the center console. He shoved one hand down the front of Kitt’s shorts, rubbing and massaging his cock as he unfastened his shorts with the other hand. Kitt lifted the steering wheel and Austin’s head went down. In one swivel of the tongue, Kitt’s cock was sucked deep inside Austin’s mouth. It was no effort to Austin, he deep throated Kitt on the first try.
Kitt hissed in a breath and jerked his hips up, going deeper down Austin’s throat. Austin’s head moved up and down, sucking Kitt in and out as he worked his sac out of his shorts. The action was so hot, all Kitt could manage was a few throaty breaths as he tangled his fingers in Austin’s hair. His eyes rolled in the back of his head and his head dropped back on the headrest.
“Baby… you’re so good at this.” It emerged more of a moan, Austin knew all the right moves as he rolled Kitt’s balls in his palm. Austin only broke from the deep suction to whisper his warm breath over Kitt’s aching cock.
“Come in my mouth when you’re deep. Jam it down my throat. I like that the best.” Austin was back on him, licking, sucking and bringing Kitt to an almost automatic climax. He came hard as he shoved himself down Austin’s throat. His tangled fingers pushed Austin’s head further down on his cock until the orgasm took him over the edge, and he forgot everything.
When he opened his eyes, Austin’s face was in his, wiping the back of his hand over his lips, clearly proud of himself. The grin was too much, and Kitt smiled a lazy grin back as Austin spoke. “You were perfect. I like it just like that. That minute of not being able to breathe as you shoot your load down my throat. I like that a lot.”
“I remembered.” Kitt kept the grin on his face and lifted his hand, stroking his thumb across Austin’s cheek and jaw until he threaded his fingers into Austin’s hair. He loved the excitement Austin so obviously experienced at giving him a blow job. He cupped Austin’s head, bringing him forward and swiped his tongue across Austin’s lips, loving the taste of himself that lingered there.
“I swallowed you all and cleaned you up,” Austin
said against his lips, and waggled his eyebrows.
“So I’m guessin’ we’re at the point of figurin’ out exactly what the other likes…you like me to rim you. It makes you come every time. I could do it now for you if you would come to my house…” Kitt tried again, still sated from his climax. Austin laid his head and upper body down along Kitt chest, snuggling up as Kitt held him there tightly. The angle was perfect to keep them face to face.
“It’s an incredibly tempting offer. One I’m going to so regret missing out on. Seth’s driving me crazy. The plane’s waiting, and I have to get rid of him. You can’t see from this direction, but he’s flashing the porch light at me now. He’s ready to go. Are you sure you can’t ride with me? We could get a little room in some rundown motel. Maybe there will be an old vibrating bed.”
“I have to stay.” Kitt smiled at the thought of Austin Grainger in a roach motel somewhere along a Texas highway.
“I want you to want me.” Austin said the sweet confession so plainly. “I wanted you to come for me. It’s the only reason I wasn’t at your door last night.”
“I do. I want you so bad.” It was dark outside. Kitt could make out Austin’s face, but the dark helped hide some of the emotion those simple words stirred inside him. Kitt lowered his head, kissing Austin thoroughly until there was a rap on the window of the truck.
“I’m coming. Get in the truck, Seth.” Austin sweet tone turned hard. Austin didn’t move, nor did he break eye contact with Kitt. “You’ll come over tomorrow night?”
“Absolutely. You keep this hard-on waitin’ for me.” Kitt slid his hand down, gripping Austin tightly.
“I don’t think that’s gonna be much of a problem.” Austin ran his hands over Kitt’s face, looking at him closely. “You’re such a handsome man.”
“That’s exactly what I thought about you when I saw you sittin’ at that table tonight.”
“You mean something to me, Kitt,” Austin said, and leaned in again for another kiss.
Texas Pride Page 23
