by Dyan Chick
Almost immediately after sitting, Terra's chauffeur arrived carrying a tray of pancakes, orange juice, and strawberries. The smell of the food made my stomach ache.
"Thank you, Marco," Terra said as Marco set the tray in the middle of the table.
I eyed the food, wondering if it was a stupid idea to accept food from a stranger. A magical stranger. The story of Persephone and the pomegranate seeds she ate in Hades flashed through my mind.
Terra slid a plate in front of me and my mouth watered. She picked up a fork and knife and cut into her food. "Eat up."
I couldn't even remember the last time I ate. Hunger won and I took a bite. I sunk down into the chair, savoring the best bite of food I'd ever had.
"Good?" Terra asked.
I nodded, mouth full.
She smiled and set down her silverware. "You'll enjoy your time here. My staff will care for you, bring you anything you need."
I swallowed. Here comes the bad news. My expression must have revealed how I was feeling.
Terra waved her hands up in front of her and leaned back away from me. "No strings, of course. You're free to go if you wish. I just thought you could use a few days to recover."
I let out a breath I didn't know I'd been holding. "Nobody on your staff is going to try to kill me?"
She shook her head. "Ara, we are a civilized operation. I am nothing like those circus folk."
"What are you, exactly?" A chill ran through me. After everything I'd seen in the circus, I no longer knew what to expect. Was anyone what they seemed? "You're not human, right?"
Terra nodded to my empty plate, ignoring my question. "Are you still hungry?"
At the moment, I felt nauseous. "No, thank you."
"Why don't you sleep? I'll explain it all after you get some rest,” Terra said.
A soft growling noise made the hair on my arms stand on end. I turned to see a huge wolf walking toward us. He stopped in front of the table and sat down, looking from me to Terra as if waiting to join in on the conversation.
"Jasper," Terra said. "Is one of my most loyal wolves. He will stand guard at your room while you rest. You'll be safe here."
I wasn't sure I knew what safe was anymore and I had a feeling Jasper wasn't just keeping people from getting in. I was willing to bet he was here to keep me from getting out.
18
When I woke, the sky was dark again. It had been a little after nine in the morning last I saw the clock. Stretching, I took a minute to run through the events of the last few days. If it weren't for the unfamiliar room, I would have guessed it had been a strange, very elaborate dream. I wish it had been a dream.
A knock on the door sent my heart pounding. I hadn't expected visitors. "Yes?"
The door opened, and I pulled the blanket up to my neck. I went to sleep in just my underwear. The bumblebee dress was filthy from my travels and also carried too many bad memories to wear any longer.
A tall, thin man dressed from head-to-toe in black leather walked into the room carrying a bag. He had spiky black hair and piercings in places I didn't realize you could pierce. He flushed at the sight of me and lowered his gaze. "I'm so sorry, I thought you'd be up."
"What time is it?" I asked.
"Eight O'Clock," he said.
I looked at the window behind me. It was still dark. Eight at night. That was a strange time for a girl in her twenties to be asleep. "I had a long night."
He looked back up at me. "We usually sleep during the day around here, but most of us are up by four. Did you want me to come back later?"
"No, I'm up. Wait, why are you here?" I asked.
"She sent this for you. Dinner is in an hour." He held out a brown paper bag.
I pulled the blanket up closer to my neck. "Can you leave it for me? I'm not really - decent."
He turned an even deeper scarlet and set the bag down on the ground, then walked back to the door.
“Hey, do you know where I could find a phone? There’s someone I want to call.”
He turned, then shook his head. “No phones. They don’t work inside of Terra’s Place.”
My shoulders slumped. It was like the Circus train all over again. Calling my brother would go a long way to making me feel better. I wondered how he was settling in at his new place. Maybe Terra would let me leave after dinner.
"Thanks," I said. "What's your name? Are you part of all of this?"
"We're all a part of this, don't you know that?" He looked sympathetic. Or maybe just worn down. "Name's Jasper. I'll see ya around, Ara."
Jasper closed the door behind him, leaving me feeling disconnected from the world. Hadn't the wolf Terra sent with me last night been named Jasper? My head ached, feeling overwhelmed by the new information that had been thrown at me lately. There was so much in this world that I never knew existed. I wasn't even sure of what was real anymore. It might be a good thing that I couldn’t call my brother right now. I wasn’t sure how I was going to explain any of this to him.
I sat there with the covers pulled up to my neck a few minutes longer, half expecting more intrusions. While I waited to see if the coast was clear, I considered the fact that I still didn't have any answers about any of this. Terra had said she wasn't with the circus but hadn't told me what she was. The members of the Rose Circus were all sorts of creatures - and they were all cursed. Terra promised answers, and I wanted to hear them.
Hopping down from the bed, I walked over to the large paper bag that Jasper had left on the floor. I unrolled the top and saw a pile of fabric inside. Clothes. Dumping the bag, I found I had a few choices. The bag had a simple sleeveless black dress, a black pencil skirt, a gray silk and lace shirt, and a nude colored, tight lace dress. I raised an eyebrow at the lace dress. There was no way I had the confidence to pull something like that off.
I set all of the clothes on the bed and found my way to the bathroom, hoping I could make myself look presentable before dinner. Terra had looked so well put together when we met last night... this morning. My days and nights were blending together. How long had it even been since I left Chicago? Time seemed to function differently around the new people I'd met.
A hot shower and a brush through my hair did wonders for my mood. The bathroom was fully stocked with soaps, hair products, and makeup. I was starting to feel like myself again. Maybe this wasn't as bad as I thought, maybe Terra is just a concerned citizen, and she'll get one of her minions to drop me off at the nearest bus station in the morning. I pinned my hair out of my face and stared at my reflection, trying to make myself believe that everything could go back to normal. I wasn't even sure what normal was anymore.
The black dress was the least form-fitting of the clothing choices. I pulled it over my head and walked on bare feet to the door. When I opened it, I found a shoe box sitting in front. I wondered if Jasper had been sent with those but felt too shy to knock again. Opening the box, I found a pair of black designer pumps. They probably cost more than I'd make in a month.
I glanced around the hall, not seeing anyone in sight. The top floor of Tara's place was like a hotel. Lined with matching doors with gold numbers in the middle of them.
With a sigh, I slid into the shoes. They fit like Cinderella's, and I wobbled a bit as I took a few steps away from the door. I rarely wore heels and was out of practice walking in them. The heels sunk into the deep purple carpet as I walked, and by the time I made it to the stairs, I had developed a rhythm. Retracing the steps from last night, I followed the path Terra had taken me on, back to the greenhouse.
What had been a bright and vibrant space this morning took on a more sinister quality in the darkness. The trees and foliage created shadows and dark places where creatures large or small could hide. My heart beat quickened, and I moved faster along the path through Tara's garden.
The sound of running water should have been peaceful, but everything about this place now made me feel on edge. Heavy breathing came from behind me and I spun around to see a large gray wolf following me. After recoveri
ng from my heart trying to escape from my chest, I leaned down so my face was level with the wolf's. "Jasper?"
The wolf didn't respond. He just stood there panting, then licked his lips. I backed away and moved faster through the greenhouse.
"Ara?" A female figure was silhouetted by the door frame at the end of the pathway.
"Terra?"
She took a few steps toward me. Tonight she was in a shimmery copper colored dress with a plunging neckline. Her wrists jingled from the dozens of gold bangles she wore on them. "Come, we have much to talk about."
I followed her back through the maze of rooms to one of the private dining rooms. A long table filled the center of the room and several people sat around it waiting for us. Conversation stopped as soon as we stepped in.
All of the dinner guests were in formal attire and I was grateful I didn't have to wear the tattered and dirty bumblebee costume I had arrived in.
Two chairs sat empty at the table, the head position and a chair on the left side next to it. Terra pulled back the chair on the side and I sat down. She took the position at the head of the table. Faces turned away from me, and conversations resumed. I let out a breath and glanced around, unsure of what I should be doing.
A woman with short gray hair and round black glasses sat next to me. She smiled at me, showing the wrinkles around her eyes and mouth. She reached a small, bony hand out to me. "I'm Pearl."
"Ara," I said, taking her hand in my own. Her skin was paper-thin and she reminded me of my grandmother. "Nice to meet you."
Terra was making small talk with the man on the other side of her and I wondered how long I should wait before I asked her what the hell was going on. Why was I part of a formal dinner party?
"How long have you been in Terra's service?" Pearl asked.
I turned back to the woman, taken off guard by her question. "I'm sorry, what?"
Terra set her hand on top of mine. "Ara doesn't work for me. She's my guest."
The whole table grew quiet. Terra's conversation was clearly of interest to all the occupants of the room. Terra lowered her voice, but in the intimate room, the sound traveled. "She's just escaped from the Rose Circus."
A collective gasp came from the people around the table. My eyes darted around, trying to discern what it meant. Their reaction wasn't what I expected. They looked at me as if I were a plague survivor. Like they were both equally impressed that I was alive and afraid that they would catch something from me.
"How did you get away?" Pearl asked. "They're barbarians."
"I..." Were they barbarians? That was such a strange term to use. Brenon's sharp-toothed smile and electric green eyes flashed through my mind. Then, I thought of our moment alone, when I tried to wipe off the makeup.
"They let me go," I said.
"It can't be," the man on the other end of the table said. "Is it possible, Terra? Is she the one we've been waiting for?"
Terra took a drink from the glass in front of her. "I think she might be. My brother sure seems to think she's special enough to risk bringing her on that train full of miscreants."
My blood ran cold and my head spun. Brother? Was she talking about Brenon? Was it possible? More secrets. What else were they hiding from me? "He's your brother?"
19
Terra smiled at me, trying and failing to look sweet. She had a look about her that wasn't too far off of Brenon's predatory expression. My eyes widened as the similarities between their personalities and their movements struck me. They didn't look alike, but I'd never seen Brenon without his makeup.
"Yes, Ara. I'm afraid that lost soul you met on the train, the leader of that pathetic circus of misfits, is my brother." She looked around the table. "We've been looking for him for years, but he keeps so many enchantments on that train that we always seem to be a step behind."
"Why are you looking for him?" I asked.
"It's a rather long story," she said. "What it comes down to is that he was punished and he ran and hid instead of accepting his sentence."
"I don't understand," I said. "They told me they were cursed."
"A curse of his own making. The Sayge who cursed him caused a ripple that went beyond her wildest dreams. A curse powerful enough to punish all of us. While I didn't lose my magic, I was cast out of my home," she said.
"So the curse," I played with the edge of the tablecloth while I tried to put it all together. "Had side effects?"
"Precisely," Terra said. "What should have been revenge against my brother and his philandering ways had long term effects on all who lived in our Realm."
"I don't understand." I looked around the table and realized I seemed to be the only one wearing an expression of confusion. This wasn't a new conversation at Terra's private parties. "What does this have to do with me?"
Terra set her glass down and leaned toward me. "He wants your help, but I think you're smart enough to realize that he's not the one you should be helping."
Brenon had never asked anything of me aside from paying my brother’s debt. Terra seemed to think there was some other reason I was on that train. I waited in silence, watching her calm expression.
Terra was like a hunter, staring down her prey. Her gaze didn't waver as she looked into my eyes. Something told me she wasn't someone I should cross, yet I couldn't see myself helping her.
"I'm not the bad guy, here," she said. "I just want to get myself, and all the other magical beings who want to go home, back to our realm where we belong. You see, all this time we've been here, I've done my best to protect the humans of your world. I keep them from finding out about us. I punish those who abuse or take advantage of humans. Our kind doesn't belong here, Brenon doesn't belong here. And I think you can help us go back."
I shook my head in confusion. She was the one with magic, not me. What could she possibly want me to do to help her?
Several waiters in white button up shirts and black bow-ties entered the room with trays of food. Plates were set in front of each person at the table. I was grateful for the distraction and the opportunity to turn away from Terra. She wanted something from me, but what could I do? I was a human sitting in a room with a Fae.
The sound of silverware on plates and quiet conversation filled the room. Prior to the food's arrival, Terra and I had been the only entertainment. Now, it was as if this were a normal dinner party. Like nothing out of the ordinary had happened.
I sat there with my hands on my lap feeling like I was having an out of body experience. After a long moment of listening to the sounds in the room, I turned to Terra. "I don't even know how I would help you."
She finished cutting the huge piece of steak on her plate. Blood oozed out of the meat and my insides squirmed. I hadn't eaten meat in almost ten years and the sight of it made me nauseous.
"First, you can help me find him. I think he'd come if you went looking for him,” she said. "I want to have a conversation with him. It's been years since we last spoke and he has been avoiding me. You can arrange that for us.“
I couldn't explain it, but a flicker of loyalty rose up in me. For some reason, I didn't feel like betraying the circus. It didn't make any sense. The only thing I could gather was that when she asked me to choose sides, my intuition had stepped in and chosen the circus. I knew how wrong my intuition had been most of my life. That alone should make me want to help Terra, but I had a feeling that her intentions toward the circus were not going to be limited to a talk. "How does a conversation with him fix things?"
"Well, that's for starters." She shrugged. "I don't have enough magic on my own to break the spell. I'll need his help."
"But you said he lost his magic," I said.
She smirked. "You've been listening. Yes, he lost most of his magic, but with his power, he still retained more than most of the creatures who were not cursed.”
I thought about the things I had seen in my short time at the circus. Had all of it been Brenon's doing? What had he been capable of before the curse? What was Terra cap
able of? The thought sent a chill through me and I bit down on the inside of my cheek to keep from showing the fear that was prickling inside me. Terra wanted something from me and I had a feeling she wasn't going to stop until she got it. Feeling brave, I took a deep breath. "Why would I help you? What makes you better than him?"
She lifted a piece of the meat to her mouth and I looked down at my plate. Surprisingly, it was made up of only vegetables. Then I remembered how she knew my name. I wondered exactly how powerful a Fae who had retained her magic was. Brenon seemed to have some magic, certainly enough to impress me, but according to Tera, he'd lost his to the curse. My heart raced. Did she know everything about me? I looked back up at her, trying to mask the panic in my expression.
She swallowed her food. "You should want to help me because you know how bad it's gotten out there for your species. Why do you think things have gotten worse every year since the days of the Greeks? Violence, hate, greed. All of that stems from humans being moved in directions they don't want to go by magical beings. Our realms are not supposed to coexist and it's causing humanity to crumble into self-destruction."
"What about free will?" I didn't doubt that having Fae and other creatures running around was causing some issues with humans, but people were smarter than we were given credit for. And humans were perfectly capable of destroying themselves. I didn't see how it would take creatures from another realm to do that.
"Did it feel like free will to you when you took that pill at the party? Did it feel like you had a choice when you kept going back for more?" she asked.
My breath caught and I stared at her in shock. She does know. She knew all about me. And she was right. I had lost control of myself, my whole life - everything had spiraled out of control. I shook my head. "That was my fault. I did that to myself."
She snapped her fingers and the door opened. Jasper walked through in his leather pants, looking entirely out of place in the room. He handed something to Terra then left without a word.
Terra dropped a baggie onto my plate. I looked down at it. I'd seen the same type of bag a hundred times. Inside was a single blue pill. The pill that had caused me so much pain. A sticker marked the bag as a way of branding. I never paid much attention to the brand when I first started using. If Logan gave me something to take, I didn't question him. I was so infatuated with him, I followed him blindly. Later, I was so desperate for my next hit that I didn't care where it came from. Now, I wondered if I had seen this label before. It was hard to miss the orange circle with the drawing of a rose. The word Circus cut through the flower in the same lettering used on the flyer. I felt my face grow hot.
