Suddenly Diamond couldn’t inhale enough air. Her pupils were huge and dark as she stared up at him, her heart beating so fast she was sure he could hear it.
He loosed a ragged breath and caught her face in his hands. “You are driving me out of my mind. The thought of anyone else touching you, of even seeing other males look at you like they did makes me want to destroy something. I don’t want anyone else to touch you. Not ever. I know that makes me possessive and selfish, but I can’t stop myself.”
Diamond watched his eyes fill with sorrow and guilt.
“I am so sorry for how I have hurt you, for what has happened to you since we met. What happened to Amy,” his voice caught, “I couldn’t let that happen to you.”
Diamond dropped her eyes, her heart bleeding for him. His whole life had been built around violence and death, and now he was placing his heart at her feet, apologising for who he was.
“I’m sorry I could not save your friend. And I’m so, so sorry about Rose, I-I couldn’t—”
Diamond interrupted him. “Hugo, stop apologising. What you said earlier, why you did what you did. I am sorry all that happened to you, that this happened to you,” she said, reaching out and touching his scar. His hand was warm as he covered hers and pushed his cheek into her palm.
“No, you don’t understand,” he whispered. “There is something else that I need to confess.”
Confess? Her teeth bit into her bottom lip. She pulled back, suddenly frightened. “What?”
Silence.
“Hugo?” Her stomach twisted with a surge of anxiety.
He dropped his head and heaved a sigh. When he brought his head back up she gasped in horror. Needle sharp blue teeth protruded from his gums.
“No,” she whispered. The room spun as the blood rushed from her head. “No, you can’t be like her.” Images of Kitty and Rose swam through her mind and she scooted away from him, into the middle of the bed.
“I am nothing like her,” Hugo uttered, those teeth disappearing immediately. His eyes turned pleading. “Diamond, please listen to me before you judge me. That day near Sentinel’s Cave, when you fought so hard to save everyone, when your magic almost killed us, I couldn’t let you die. I knew that you were my Nexus, but my need to save you was so much deeper than our magical bond. I wanted to protect you, to save you. I knew even then that my heart, my soul, was utterly lost to yours.” His throat bobbed. “I couldn’t let your magic take you from me, not when I had only just found you. You were dying, and I had no other way to save you.” He gulped and met her eyes. “I bit you,” he told her, his hands shaking as he reached out to cup her face again.
Diamond stared at him, trying to process his words. “You bit me? Like the Queen does to her warriors? You mean you can control my thoughts, my feelings?” She trembled from head to toe, feeling sick. “And have you?” she asked, already knowing the answer.
“Yes,” he whispered, holding her gaze. “In the throne room. It wasn’t you who killed General Edo, it was me. I didn’t know if you could do it. I saw such confusion and grief in you. I simply wanted it to stop, to get you out of there. Gods, I did not want to use that whip on you—or the boy. You had both suffered enough. So I took control of your body. I have never done anything like it before and didn’t even know if it would work, but it was so easy to find our connection. I am a killer, you are not. I made you kill him.”
Diamond stared at him in horror. “It was you? Not the Queen?”
“Yes, I did it, so you wouldn’t have to. So your conscience would be clear. I always planned on telling you it was me.” He dropped her face and withdrew, sitting back on his haunches. “I know it was intrusive and that I should apologise, but I won’t. General Edo betrayed you and killed your father. Gods, he wanted to kill you and Jack. He deserved death. I was not about to let the Queen torture you or that boy because of him.”
Diamond pressed her lips into a tight line, unable to answer. Her mind whirled. Not only was their magic bonded, but he had injected her with venom and swallowed her blood. She hugged her knees, the implications of that last realisation hitting her hard.
“You could have used that venom bond anytime since. You could have made me do anything,” she whispered. “Anything! Did you? At Gorian’s inn, did you make me want you, did you make me touch you?” The moment those words left her lips she regretted them. Hugo would never do something so debase; besides, that feeling of fogginess in her mind had never returned after the throne room.
Hugo face fell into a mask of sadness, the sapphire of his eyes turning to endless shadow. “I have never coerced your thoughts or feelings regarding me. Every time I have felt your hate, your disappointment, your fear towards me seep into your magic, it has crushed me. There have been many times my self-control has nearly abandoned me, and all I want to do is hold you and kiss you. I could have taken advantage of you before, even now I can feel and scent your desire as much as you can mine, but please credit me with some honour. I know telling you this might cause me to lose you, but I want you to trust me, to think you can rely on me. I do not want any more secrets between us. None.”
Diamond watched his muscles contract as he slowly shifted to kneel on the bed next to her, giving her time to stop him. The mattress dipped, tipping her towards him. Gently, his calloused fingers grasped her chin and turned her to face him. Diamond did not resist. Her mouth dried out at the tenderness swimming in his eyes. She needed to hear what he had to say, her whole being needed to know.
Hugo took a deep breath. “Diamond, I am drawn to you like no other person I have ever met. My soul craves yours as much as my magic does.” With his other hand he took one of hers and placed it over his heart. His skin was so hot she gasped and closed her eyes. “There is something else. I know this sounds like madness but when you are in danger, I can feel something raging inside me—another entity. I have to fight to control it. It desires freedom, and it is only ever happy when I am near you, keeping you safe. Diamond, we are bound by venom and magic but my feelings for you run even deeper than that. It’s as if my soul, everything that I am, is yours. I can give you up no more than I can stop breathing.” His thumb brushed shakily over her lower lip. “I love you,” he whispered.
His voice and words washed through her, warming her heart even as his magic tentatively caressed her face.
Her heart clenched so tightly it hurt. “You love me?” she whispered, her breath fanning his thumb.
“With everything that I am,” he replied softly.
“But what about the Queen? You still serve her.”
“No, I no longer serve her. When I first brought you to the palace, I was still confused about the depth of my feelings for you, and about our Nexus. I didn’t understand how I could fall so hard or feel so drawn to a woman I’d just met. To start with, when we were in the forest, I tried to argue it was only my age, that my urge and instincts were affecting my senses, but I soon discovered it was far more than that. I am strong, I can fight with my body and magic, but as soon as those nightmarish wraiths tried to steal your soul, something changed inside me. I couldn’t let you go, though I had no idea how to protect you from the danger I had forced upon you. I tried my best, but it wasn’t until the Queen had us both in that throne room that I realised she knew how I felt and had been manipulating me for weeks.” He shook his head. “I suspect she worked it out the night of the banquet when she saw me smile for the first time since Amy. I can only apologise for my weakness in not letting you go. Then it was too late. I didn’t know how to get you out or how keep you safe. Jack had offered to help, but then he disappeared and I was alone. It wasn’t until those rebels took you that I realised my soul would not survive without yours.”
Diamond stared at his solemn face. Time. She needed time to process all this. I love you. Those words echoed around her shocked mind. And the bite. He had lied again. No, she reasoned, he hasn’t lied, but he should have told me before. And what would I have done then? she asked herself. Pushed hi
m away like he thinks I’m going to now?
“Diamond? Please, say something,” he beseeched her.
“I don’t know what to say, Hugo. You can have so much control over me now.”
“That is not why I bit you!” he ground out.
“But you already have controlled me. In the throne room!” she cried out, still struggling to comprehend his confessions.
“I took control of you to save you. The guilt of ending someone you loved would have destroyed you. And no matter what he did, you still loved him. I have been there, Diamond, and that guilt never, ever leaves you. You did not kill General Edo. I did.”
Diamond hugged her knees tighter and rocked.
Hugo’s shoulders slumped at her continued silence.
The knowledge he could have controlled her, taken advantage of her, but that he hadn’t, tightened her belly painfully. He wanted trust, and sharing his past with her, the horrific abuse he had witnessed and been subjected to, that was his way of reaching out to her, of starting to build far more than a magical bond. And so was telling her the truth about how she had survived her own magic’s attack.
Diamond stared at Hugo’s face. This warrior had saved her life so many times, in so many ways. Something inside her stirred, her heart fluttering. He had never truly let her down. He had only ever tried to save her from Amy’s fate.
Hugo withdrew, wrapping his magic around himself protectively. Slowly, he backed away. When one of his feet hit the floor, Diamond knew she could not let him go.
“Where are you going?” she asked, her heart hammering in her chest, not from anger but nerves and anticipation. Hugo was being honest, now it was her turn.
“I understand your anger, Diamond,” he sighed dejectedly. “I’ll leave. Find somewhere else to stay.”
“No!” The word burst from her. Reaching out she grabbed his hand. Slowly she looked up at her beautiful warrior. And that’s what he was—beautiful, even with the twisted scar marking his face. “I’m not angry, and I do trust you. Please, don’t leave.” Her heart squeezed in her chest.
When he made no further move, Diamond spoke again. “When you bit me, did you swallow my blood?” she asked hoarsely.
“Yes,” he replied, watching her intently.
Oh. Heat rushed her face. If he swallowed her blood a second time she would belong to him. A mating tie that could only be broken by death. Keeping her voice steady was impossible as she asked the words her father had taught her. She loved this complicated, scarred warrior, no matter how messed up their situation or lives were. Being without him did not bear thinking about. Raising her eyes and lifting her chin she began.
“You say you love me, Hugo Casimir. Does that mean you will forsake every other soul in this world—for me? That you will bind yourself to me, heart, soul and blood?” she whispered, holding his eyes with her own. Silver sparks ignited into flame as he heard those ancient words. This was the fae mating pledge. She was offering her heart to him and willing to trust he meant every word he had said to her. “Do you want me to be yours and ask I forsake every other soul—human or fae—for you? That you will…”
Hugo dropped onto his knees beside her and grasped her face in his hands. “Shh! Diamond, wait,” he breathed.
Diamond fell into the heat of his gaze.
His eyes roamed her face, stopping briefly on her lips before he spoke again. “My love, I want you to be mine as much as I want to belong to you.” His fingers brushed her cheek then moved lightly across her lips. “But when we take that vow and drink from each other’s soul, I need to know you’re certain.”
Willing him to believe her, she held his gaze. “Hugo, I am not a child. I know exactly what I want. I have known it since the moment I looked in your eyes. I want to be yours. Only yours.”
For a moment he seemed to stop breathing, the silver strands of his energy wrapping around her. Caressing her, they set her nerves on edge and her skin on fire.
“Then let me love you. Let me show you how much I adore you, and we will pledge ourselves to each other,” he replied, in a low growling voice.
A sigh escaped her as the warmth of his magic flooded into her limbs and heat from his skin washed over her body. Closing her eyes, Diamond turned her face into his fingers, daring to kiss each one softly. His skin was hard and calloused but so very warm on her lips. Tiny silver sparks escaped the ribbons of his energy, nipping gently at her exposed skin and making it tingle madly.
She heard him catch his breath and groan as she took one of his fingers in her mouth, sucking gently. Her eyes flew open, and she moved closer to him. Her heart pounded chaotically. She desperately wanted to touch him, to touch his silky skin, to feel his warmth and strength under her fingers. He had just declared himself hers—if she wanted him. No one and nothing else mattered right now, not even the Queen.
Diamond reached out a hand, running it down the outline of his broad shoulder and muscled arm. His skin was hotter than she thought possible. He tensed as her fingers trailed to his naked chest, exploring the contours of his body. She gripped him, digging her nails into his waist; he wrapped one hand in her hair, bunched his fingers into a fist and held her head back. Slowly he tipped his head forward, keeping his eyes on hers, holding them unblinkingly. Her lips parted as he moved to kiss her but he held back, teasing her lips with his tongue until she moaned.
“You have to ask me,” he whispered, pulling ever so slightly away. His hand tightened in her hair until she gasped, their hot breath mingling. “You have to ask me or I won’t kiss you,” he rasped, his voice shaking. “I need to know this is what you want.”
She did not hesitate. “I do want you,” she told him, not releasing his gaze. He needed to believe her. “I want you to kiss me and—”
Her words were lost as he groaned and pushed his lips against hers. His kiss was so very gentle, his mouth moving slowly and sensually against hers. A wave of desire exploded through Diamond, raging low in her belly and heating her blood. Nothing but Hugo existed; his touch, his smell, his taste. Grabbing at his head, her fingers got lost in his raven hair. She pulled him closer, not wanting to let him go. She splayed her fingers and slid her hands down, holding onto him as his weight slowly pushed her down onto the bed until he lay half on, half off her with one leg thrown over hers. Exulting in the feel of his rock-hard muscles, she ran her hands down his back, digging her nails into the scaly skin right under his wings as he gently and possessively bit her lower lip.
Growling her name, he arched his back, wrapping his fists in her hair and pulling her head down against the soft pillow so she could not move.
Experimentally, she raked her nails across that part of him again. His forehead dropped to the soft skin of her exposed shoulder, his breathing hard and ragged. Secretly she smiled, pleased her touch could affect him so.
After taking control of himself, he lifted his head. “Are you sure?” he asked, those fiery eyes staring straight into her soul.
Diamond’s heart beat wildly, the scent of their desire and the touch of their magic filling her, but she wanted more. It was hard to stop her fingers from shaking as she reached for his face. “I’ve never been more sure of anything, but…I’ve never…” her voice disappeared.
Hugo traced his fingers down her hot cheek. “It’s okay,” he said softly, such tenderness in his voice that her bones turned to liquid. “You’re going to be mine to love forever. There is no rush. We’ll take this slow and gentle. If you want me to stop, just tell me. I will not hurt you—ever.”
Diamond watched his throat bob as he swallowed hard. His eyes dropped to where her breasts strained against her shirt with every breath she took. Slowly he leaned in and kissed her, expertly moving his lips and teasing her with his tongue until she moaned, then he pulled back. She watched his strong fingers deftly unbutton her shirt. His face tightened as he pulled the folds of material apart. Breath left his lungs in a rush, his eyes raking over her naked skin.
“You’re so beautiful,” he
whispered, his hand shaking as he gently traced the curve of her left breast with his fingers.
Diamond closed her eyes and gasped, arching her back. “Hugo,” she breathed, a sound that became a yearning plea as he began to kiss every inch of her skin, from her mouth down her neck to the curve of her shoulder. His achingly beautiful eyes regarded her steadily before he smiled slightly. Moving his mouth across the bare skin of her chest, his teeth and tongue had her clutching at him desperately, her whole body on fire.
Slowly—so very slowly—his mouth trailed down her body until she arched towards him panting. Her fingers grasped again and again at the tensed muscles of his shoulders as he held his weight off her. With hooded eyes she watched him kiss more of her, unable to comprehend the sensations his touch awakened.
Tendrils of magic caressed her where his hands and mouth left off. Diamond lost the ability to think beyond those sensations. His mouth burned a trail across the soft skin of her left breast. The shoulders under her finger expanded as he looked her in the eye and inhaled—then snarled.
His whole body tensed, his energy recoiling from her with a suddenness that panicked her. Swearing viciously, Hugo literally launched himself off the bed, his wings tucked tightly into his back. Taking two quick leaps, he swept his weapons off the floor right as a fist hit the door and banged loudly.
“Cover yourself,” Hugo snarled and kicked the chair from under the door.
The firelight glinted off his naked chest as he tensed, ready to strike down whoever approached outside that door. His hair shimmered as he nodded, the deep blue streaks glinting strangely in the dying firelight.
As soon as Diamond covered her bare breasts, she shifted off the bed too. The hilt of her sword felt cool in her hot hand when Hugo yanked open the door, wings armoured, ready to fight.
CHAPTER 41
Heat and the scent of their magic and lust poured over the two fae outside the door. Their eyes widened, realising too late that they had pulled this protective fae male away from his mate.
A Bond of Blood and Fire (The Goddess and the Guardians Book 2) Page 25
