“No, not really. It was about ten years ago. I say ‘it’—the main one. But there were others, several others. But this woman was an attorney and I guess we thought we were in love, and I was awful to Carrie.” He closed his eyes for a moment and raised his head, trying to hold back the tears, terribly embarrassed when he failed. His voice cracked again, and he said in a whisper, “I’ve been such a bad husband, Richard. For years I just ignored Carrie—worse, I walled her out, on purpose. She’s so loving and just wants the best for me. But I slept with this young attorney and lied to Carrie and then pushed her out of my life, all the time figuring she’d always just be there. I hurt her so much. I was so selfish. But now I feel so dirty, like I can never be clean again, ever.
“It’s too much, Richard. It’s all crashing in. I’ve tried to do the right things, but I’ve pretty well screwed up everything, though I doubt you’d really understand, even as good a friend as you are. I’m sure you’ve never experienced anything like this.”
Richard let him finish and waited. Then in a low but calm voice he said, “Only a few years ago, William, I was having an affair and doing the same things to Janet that you did to Carrie, including the walling out. I didn’t just feel dirty, I felt like garbage, like there was no hope for me or my family because of me. But I kept on doing it! Janet should have left me.”
As Richard continued, William looked up and watched him, surprise and concern on his face. “I...I came that close to personal and financial ruin, and our kids were only a few months away from being destroyed by the pressures of our society, compounded by my own ignorance and stupidity. I should have lost them, William, lost them completely, and forever...Forever losing your own children. Can you imagine, William? What worse thing could a father possibly do?” And now it was Richard’s turn to wipe his eyes.
“I didn’t know,” William said. “I thought you and Janet were always pretty happy. And now you seem so in love, and it sounds like your kids are doing great. What happened?”
Richard took a deep breath and exhaled, looking straight at William while he did. “You want the truth?”
William nodded.
“Okay, here it is, man to man and friend to friend—if you’re ready for it, because it isn’t easy. I got down off my high horse as the macho I-know-it-all-and-can-do-it-all male, and gave up. I finally realized that in my own power I was about to crash and burn and take my wife and children with me. Some loving and patient people took a lot of time, first to get my attention by the quiet power of their lives, and then to lead me to that same power. But they couldn’t do it all. I had to be broken. I had to realize that I was flying the plane into the ground on my own, and I had to ask for help. And I had to be ready to admit that I had been wrong and ask for forgiveness. William, those were the toughest and the happiest things I ever did. And whatever has happened to me since, it’s happened because I gave up trying to do it all and submitted to God’s will.”
“God’s?”
“Yes. The Father who wants to say ‘I know you sometimes feel like a ten-year-old. But hold tightly onto my hand, and I’ll give you the power to have all the wisdom you need Because it will be my power.’... William, let me ask you: do you see a difference in Janet and me?”
William didn’t pause. “Yes.”
“Is it real?”
“Yes, it seems to be.”
“Then God is real, William, because the only difference in us is that his Holy Spirit is living inside us, right now. And he cleaned up all that miserable garbage like you’re feeling right now in one instant We’re truly new people, born again by his grace and his mercy. We can feel it, and people tell us they can see it. It’s very, very real, William, and very powerful.”
Something snapped inside William. All the words that had been spoken to him over the years, from Mary to Michael Tate to his reading of the Founding Fathers to Carrie, were preparation for the truth that suddenly burst upon him with Richard’s explanation.
There was a bolt of lightning and a crash of thunder so close together that both men involuntarily ducked. They could hear rain starting to come down in torrents. William felt the hairs on his neck and arms standing up from the revelation that swept over him. He closed his eyes as the truth penetrated him. Richard’s right. It’s obvious. They are different. Why haven’t I understood it before? If they’re real then he must be real And God can get rid of this awful pain I feel? Forgive me for all the terrible things I’ve done, especially to Carrie? O God, yes, please forgive me. I’m so sorry Please help me. Please, please help me. O God, I give up. I don’t want to run from you any more. Please, please help me and forgive me. O God, what have I done? What a fool I’ve been. Please forgive me. Come and help me. I’m sorry Please...HELP ME!
Richard watched the waves sweep over his friend and the tears stream down his cheeks. William shook and slumped slightly on the bench, broken and sobbing.
When the waves appeared to have slowed, Richard asked quietly, “My friend, do you want a new life?”
William nodded and then looked up. He wiped his tears with his towel and asked, “How, Richard? How can I have what you’ve got? How can I get rid of this pain?”
Richard smiled and said calmly. “You and I can’t do anything, but Jesus can do everything through the power of the Holy Spirit. Let’s ask him.” Richard moved to the side and got down on his knees. “Let’s ask him together.” William joined him without hesitation, on his knees to his Lord for the first time in years.
“I’ll pray to God, and if you feel the same thing in your heart, you pray to him directly from your heart. Okay?”
William nodded and closed his eyes.
They prayed together, with William following Richard in a prayer of repentance and faith.
After Richard stopped praying out loud, neither of them moved. Each of them continued to pray silently. Finally William looked up, smiling, his cheeks still wet but his tears no longer flowing. Unsteady, he rose to his feet. Richard followed.
“Richard, I...my sister was right, all those years ago! Where have I been? He took all those sins! From me! Richard, am I really a new person today? It’s funny—I don’t feel completely different or light headed. But I do feel clean. For the first time in a very long time. Why did I wait so long? I’m sorry, God, that I waited so long. Thank you. Thank you, Richard.” William reached out to Richard, and they hugged.
“I’ll tell you the same thing a younger man said to me, William: ‘Welcome to God’s kingdom, my friend.’”
William stepped back and asked, “Richard, what happens now? I don’t feel like dancing and singing—I just feel drained and at peace.”
“William, your name is now written in the Book of Life. You’re God’s, forever. But if you want to experience all that he can do for, with, and through you, then you need to do a few things.”
“What? Tell me.”
Richard smiled. “Here, let’s sit down again.” Richard spent ten minutes telling William about his own experiences when he first gave his life to the Lord.
When Richard finished, William said, “So read the Bible, pray, and find teachers and a good church to join. That’s how I can build a relationship with God?”
“Yes.”
“It seems so simple.”
“It is, William, but very, very powerful. It’s just amazing. You’ll learn new things about yourself and about the world, especially about how God wants us to live in this world. Given your unique job, I think you’ll find it very, very interesting.”
William smiled. “I think he may have already been trying through the writings of earlier presidents and leaders. But I wasn’t ready to hear. We’ll see.”
“Isn’t God amazing?” Richard asked. “Imagine all of the many threads that wove together in both our lives over many years for us to be here, in this place, on this day, for you to become part of God’s kingdom. He is simply awesome. That’s an overused word, but not where God’s concerned.”
“Richard, I can�
�t thank you enough,” William said, extending his hand.
They shook hands firmly. “Don’t thank me: thank God. You’re his now. It’s the greatest joy and a great responsibility. But work on the relationship, William, particularly for the first few months. Become grounded in his Word, and seek godly men to advise you. Pray about his will for you. Don’t rush into things. He’s totally faithful. He will answer.”
“I guess we’d better go find Carrie and Janet. I don’t know about Janet, but Carrie isn’t going to believe what happened in this gym today!”
Richard returned his smile, and as they turned the corner into the main exercise room, they were astonished to see that the storm had blown completely away and bright sun shone in through all the windows. “Can you believe that?” Richard asked.
“Richard, after the last hour, I can believe absolutely anything, so long as God is involved.”
William and Richard were early as they returned to the president’s private quarters and tossed their streetclothes over a sofa on their way to the kitchen. Janet was seated at the island and Carrie was cutting a tomato for their sandwiches. The two women were talking about an old painting they had found behind a table leaf in the second closet they had searched. They looked up and saw their husbands returning in their workout clothes.
“William, lunch isn’t ready yet, and you’re a mess. Why didn’t you get cleaned up?” Carrie chided him.
William smiled. “Carrie, I just got cleaned up more than you can imagine! I...you won’t believe this. I’m a...It’s even a little hard to say.” He was half-laughing, half-crying. He turned momentarily to Richard, then back to his wife. Finally he said, “I’m a Christian!”
Stunned, Carrie put down the paring knife and looked back and forth between the two men. Janet stood up and moved over next to Richard, who was smiling and nodding.
“I gave up. I admitted to God that I’ve made a mess of our marriage and this job and just about everything because I’ve only thought about me, not him or you. Even that reading I’ve been doing was to get something out of it for me, rather than to learn about him and his will. Anyway, with Richards help, we just cleaned me up good. God’s got all that old stuff, and Richard says he’ll keep it—I can start over and try to do it right this time. Starting with us, if you’ll let me,” and he hugged Carrie tightly in his arms. She clung to him, her face beaming.
While they were still embracing, she said softly, “Oh, William. You’re right I can’t believe it But it sounds wonderful! Praise God for such a miracle, and for his grace and mercy!” She leaned back. and looked at him. “William, is this really you?”
“No, I guess not” He smiled, teasingly. “At least not the me who went down to the gym bemoaning his fate. I’m a new man, and I intend to make the rest of my time on earth count for something, if he wants it. But I realize I know almost nothing about the God who just saved me. I’ve hardly ever read the Bible. But I know today I’ve felt his power, so I’ll try to learn more about him, as Richard has told me. Carrie, I feel clean, like a kid. Hey, I’ve got to call Mary.”
While William took the phone from the wall, Carrie stepped over and hugged Richard, tears starting to pool in her eyes. Then she embraced Janet and sat down. William rang through to his older sister, and the instant joy on both ends of the line was obvious. A few minutes later he ended with, “Yes, I’ll pray. And read the Bible. And find a church. Hey, did you and Richard write a script? That’s what Rev. Wilson told you? Way back then? Come on! Really?”
“That’s what another man told me, William,” Richard interrupted. “Both the weakness and the strength of our faith is that we have to tell each other. God could tell us himself from mountain tops, but instead he’s given that job exclusively to people.”
“What?” William said, switching his attention back to the phone. “Oh, I was listening to Richard. Yes. Okay. Richard, Mary wants to know if we can switch it to the speaker phone, and she’ll get Graham and we’ll all pray together.”
“Sounds great. Yes, let’s do it.”
William pressed the speaker button and hung the phone up. Richard motioned for the four of them to join hands in a circle, and then the six of them prayed prayers of thanksgiving and praise that Saturday afternoon, as the sun shone brightly on the Mall for the first time in days.
After they finished and said good-bye, William sat on one of the kitchen stools, and Richard took a stool across the island from him. “We’ll take showers in a minute, ladies, but I was wondering while we were just praying: Do you think that studying and learning about God will change anything about how I approach this job or about our policies?”
Richard and Janet shared a quick glance, then Richard looked at William. “In my life, as I listened and read and learned from godly teachers and from the Bible, my business goals and practices changed pretty dramatically. Obviously I’m not the president of the United States, but I’ve frankly never known anyone who genuinely asked Christ to rule his life who didn’t change. Almost by definition you have to, if you’re a new person in him, and you ask the Holy Spirit to fill you afresh every day.”
William was silent for a long moment, lost in thought. “Then I might learn things from his Word and teaching that could not only change me, but change how I view the world?”
“I think you can probably count on it.”
William thought again. “Hey, you three, that’s a little scary for a fifty-year-old politician.”
Richard paused, then said seriously, “It seems scary at first for everyone who chooses Christ, William. But the blessing is that now you have him living inside you, and if you’re faithful, he’ll give you the power to do anything.”
William shook his head. “That sounds impossible. But I’m really new at this. I hope the three of you, and particularly you, Carrie, are prepared to help this uncertain old politician.”
Carrie walked over to him and put her arms around his shoulders. “Of course, sweetheart. It’s all I’ve ever wanted. But he’ll be so much more help to you than any of us. Just let him.”
“I’ll try...I really will try. I’ll pray, just like our early leaders did.” He thought for another moment, looked at the Sullivans, then turned back to his wife, his eyes wide. “Good heavens, Carrie. What’s going to happen now?”
BOOK TWO
10
The Bible...is the one supreme source of revelation of the meaning of life, the nature of God and spiritual nature and need of men. It is the only guide of life which really leads the spirit in the way of peace and salvation.... America was born a Christian nation. America was born to exemplify that devotion to the elements of righteousness which are derived from the revelations of Holy Scripture.
WOODROW WILSON
Tuesday, July 3
Four Days Later
CAMP DAVID—“It’s great to see you again, Michael.” William extended his hand to the man who had given the Easter sermon three months earlier.
Michael Tate walked up the steps to the porch at Aspen Lodge and took the president’s hand. With genuine concern he said, “It’s wonderful to be with you again, Mr. President. But of course I can’t help thinking of your parents when I’m here. Elizabeth and I were so sorry to learn of their deaths, and in such tragic circumstances. I hope Mary expressed our condolences to you.”
William held the other man’s grip for an extra moment. “Yes...yes, she did. Thank you. It was terrible. But our responsibilities don’t stop, and we’ve got to keep going despite their deaths.” After another moment his smile returned. “And Carrie and I are so glad you could join us on such short notice.”
“How could anyone refuse a White House summons to lunch at Camp David the day before Independence Day? And Mary hinted at some news which sounded wonderful.”
William escorted his guest into the lodge. “Yes, it is. And that’s why I’ve asked you to join us. Your sermon meant a lot to Carrie, and Mary obviously thinks the world of you. Frankly now I need your help and advice—ma
ybe more than I’ve ever needed advice in my life. Here’s Carrie.”
The minister and first lady exchanged greetings and a hug, then the three of them sat down in comfortable chairs near the fireplace.
“Lunch will be in a few minutes,” William began, “but I hope we might go ahead and start—I have a lot of questions, and I know you want to get home to your family for the holiday.”
“I’ll stay as long as you need me,” Michael replied.
“Thanks.” “William looked first at Carrie and then reiterated how Carrie had become a believer at Easter. He talked of his own ongoing readings on the faith of the Founding Fathers, and finally the events of the previous Saturday with the Sullivans. He left out his guilt and fear over his past affair but hinted that he’d had some setbacks in his private life that had perhaps acted as the spark for the change of his heart.
“At any rate, for reasons I still only partly understand, God has chosen to let this sinner be part of his kingdom, and I’ve given my life to him.” William was leaning forward in his chair, his elbows on his legs, hands folded in front of him. He looked down, then up at Michael, genuine humility and awe clearly on his face. “I...I don’t really know why. But I know that I’m his now. I’ve made a pretty big mess of everything on my own, and I want to stop. I want to submit to his will for me. I’ve only been a real Christian for four days, and I want to learn about the faith that obviously drove and guided the founders of our nation—but I don’t just want to learn about it— I want to know it, to make it part of me.
“Richard said that I should pray, read the Bible, find a Bible-believing church, and be taught—discipled he called it—by godly teachers. Well,” William concluded, “you’re about the godliest teacher we know, so that’s why we invited you to join us today.”
The President Page 27
