“I did. But so did you. How is it?” Carla sounded concerned now too.
“It’s, well, I just hope you enjoyed your experience.” Jacqui didn’t want to complain about something she’d worked towards, planned for.
“It was certainly eye-opening. I didn’t think it would really change anything but it has. Some things make sense now anyway.” Carla gave a light laugh.
Jacqui knew Carla wouldn’t go into detail on the phone, the same as she wouldn’t, but knew from Carla’s voice that she was okay. Her voice had become stronger as she spoke.
“So you got married then? Congratulations.”
“Thank you. It’s been an experience as well.” A boring one so far but she wasn’t going to say that out loud, ever.
“Should I come to see you?” Carla’s voice sounded almost teasing but the offer was there, nonetheless. Jacqui could hear a hint of hope in Carla’s voice.
“That would be nice. I’ll talk with Cade about it.” Jacqui was curious about that teasing note but she wasn’t going to pursue it. She’d like to see her friend though. Any port in a storm, wasn’t that the saying?
“Just let me know when. Text me the details and we’ll arrange something. Take care sweetie, Evelyn’s calling, I have to go.”
Jacqui didn’t even get to say goodbye, knowing Carla jumped when Evelyn called.
She was just putting her phone down when it started to chirp again.
“What did you forget?” A laugh escaped her as she answered.
“Pardon?” This was a different voice.
“Damesha?”
“Hey girl, I just thought I’d check on you. I guess Cade’s staying busy and leaving you to explore the city in peace, huh?” She got right to the heart of the matter.
“Yes, you know Cade. How are you, honey?” Jacqui hoped to distract Damesha quickly. Her friend had finally stepped her toes into the waters of Jacqui’s private life but at least she’d done it tactfully. Damesha let her off the hook and began telling her about Annie and Elspeth.
“Annie’s decided she’s Elspeth’s mommy and won’t leave her side. She hates the bathroom because that’s where I bathe her so she usually has to be carried in there. But if Kane or I take Elspeth in there she follows us straight in! And she sleeps under Elspeth’s crib. Annie’s always slept at my feet until now. Well, sometimes beside me if there is thunder or she’s not well, but always with me. Not anymore. My baby has stolen my dog!” Damesha laughed from the other end of the line.
“She’s a mighty defender, that little girl of yours. I miss you all. I wish…” But she stopped herself before the words came out. She let the line go silent as she castigated herself for getting caught up in the moment.
“I know honey, you’ll be home soon enough. I’ll send you something shortly, keep your phone charged. I’m going to go, there’s uh, I think Elspeth needs me.” For some reason, it sounded like there was a puppy on Damesha’s end. A madly barking puppy. Damesha quickly hung up the phone just as quickly as Carla had and Jacqui was left with nothing but the sound of a passing car to distract her.
She sighed and put the phone down. Just a few more days and she could go back to her crocheting, the trio of females that made her smile, and her empty life. Sipping at a cup of coffee that appeared at her elbow courtesy of the owner, she watched the sun as it raced across the sky. It refused to speed up no matter how hard she wished it to.
Jacqui placed the last of her bags in the trunk of the rented car and looked back at the bed and breakfast. She’d always found New Orleans magical, wonderful; a place she didn’t really want to leave. She’d been happy to return, hoping it would chase some of her sadness away but it hadn’t worked. Somehow being in the place she loved so much had made it worse.
Cade got into the car without a word and she followed him in, settling into the plush leather of the passenger seat. As the city passed her by, the morning sunlight almost blinding, she wondered if she’d ever return now. She’d only felt sadness here this time, emptiness. Suppressing an urge to sigh she settled in to playing the part of the aloof but happy new bride.
She wanted a drink but knew she’d have to wait for the flight. Jacqui looked out of the window as the streets passed them by, wondering why her purse felt so heavy. Looking inside of it, she found a bottle of her favorite rum, the rum she drank when she was alone. How did that get in there? Maybe the bed and breakfast owner had slipped it in before she left, she’d had enough of it from the woman’s bar, after all. Making a mental note to send the woman a thank you card she settled back into her seat. Maybe she’d have a bit on the plane.
“I really don’t know what else to do to fill my days. I think if I make Elspeth one more blanket you’ll start to think I’m out to kidnap her.” Two weeks later Jacqui was going stir crazy.
Cade had done his best to avoid her ever since they’d made it back to Kansas. She’d tried to join women’s groups in town but there weren’t any and the women she’d met so far were all cold and aloof, much like herself. Jacqui wasn’t necessarily looking for tight bonds but she’d hoped to build some kind of working relationship with the community, to become a part of it and be an asset for her husband. Nothing like that existed out here.
She was having to come to terms with so much so quickly that her head was spinning.
“Are you sleeping better?” Damesha asked the question in an off-hand manner as she handed Elspeth over to her new aunt. Heading over to her own kitchen sink she started to wash vegetables for a salad she was making.
“Oh. Well. Not really.” Jacqui had experienced days of nightmares when she first got back, the memory of the night her parents argued plaguing her mind. The dream replayed night after night but she could never make out what they were saying. It sounded as though she were under water and people above the water were screaming down at her.
In a moment of weakness, a moment that saw Jacqui falling asleep on Damesha’s couch, Jacqui had confided her lack of sleep to Damesha. Now the dreams had shifted, from memories to things that could be if the world was a different place. A very hot place filled with beds and black lace.
Jacqui felt her temperature rising as the dream came back to her, the dream she’d had last night about Cade coming into her room and waking her, telling her he couldn’t control himself anymore and that he needed her. Unlike reality Jacqui hadn’t pushed him away but drew him to her, begging for his touch.
In her dreams, she was unrestrained, abandoned and demanding. She wished real life could be that way. Jacqui realized she’d come to be a totally different person from the cold woman who’d stepped off a plane not that long ago. Something about witnessing Elspeth’s birth, her connection with Damesha, and the marriage had changed her.
Taking the glass of wine that appeared at the side of her hand, thanking Damesha quietly for the glass, she sipped and wondered why she’d changed. Alright, the things that had happened were pretty impressive but were they enough to make her go from a stone to a melting puddle of easily liquefied aluminum? Apparently so.
“Not really, huh? What’s keeping you up?” Damesha had the salad ready and had chicken breasts grilling in a cooker. She still wasn’t looking at Jacqui.
Jacqui felt a little less defensive when Damesha wasn’t looking at her and sighed. Rocking the baby in her arms she wondered if this little girl had more to do with her present fluctuating state. Looking at the baby closer Jacqui realized she felt much heavier than yesterday and looked bigger too.
“Has she grown?” Jacqui’s brow was crinkled down and she didn’t catch Damesha’s panicked look.
Damesha quickly picked the now sleeping baby from Jacqui’s arms and carried her away, presumably to a crib or bassinet in the other room. Jacqui shrugged and picked up her phone, wishing she could text Carla. Or Cade. Those dreams were really doing a number on her self-control. She’d caught herself staring at his name in her contact list several times, on the verge of calling him. He hadn’t changed though; there’d been no
thawing whatsoever. She hadn’t even seen him really since they got back, only in passing or at dinner, when he was totally silent.
“Girl, you can’t keep doing all that sighing. You’re starting to bring me down and I have a wedding to plan.” Damesha came in casting a castigating look at Jacqui. She turned the chicken breasts and Jacqui stared at her back, a little shocked.
“You’re going to get married now? Why bother, Elspeth’s already here.” Jacqui knew something had prevented the two from marrying before the baby was born but hadn’t been told what exactly, just that they’d needed to sort a few things out. Maybe one of them had been married already?
“Mainly just for my own satisfaction. It’s a different world than it was 100 years ago but marriage still offers a security that domestic partnerships don’t.” Damesha’s tone sounded stiff, as if she was being careful about what she revealed. Jacqui had noticed the woman did that sometimes but as she did it herself, she couldn’t call her friend out for it.
“I suppose I know what you mean.” She’d married a stranger for the same reason, hadn’t she?
“So, about this not sleeping, maybe you should get some sleeping pills or something?” Damesha was trying to be helpful.
“I have them. They don’t work. I think I need to just exercise more. I’m going to use the gym in the house this evening, run on the treadmill.” She was a newlywed, Damesha was bound to wonder why she wasn’t getting enough exercise but she knew the other woman was too tactful to ask.
“That sounds like a plan. And no caffeine before bed!” Damesha brought their food over to the table Jacqui had moved to while Damesha put the baby down and smiled at her friend. “Then we can talk about wedding stuff!”
Jacqui tried to smile but knew it was a poor attempt. She was having so many conflicting emotions she just couldn’t muster the smile. She bit into her food, repressing another sigh. Maybe it was time to try to resurrect those walls again, she considered as she bit into the grilled chicken salad. It just seemed impossible to do around Damesha.
Later in her bedroom, Jacqui started to really wonder about her decision and knew that, somehow, a part of Cade’s life had escaped notice from the private investigator Evelyn used to inspect the client’s life. She was in her room when a noise outside drew her attention. Normally cars were quiet, unassuming, and the kind that didn’t draw attention. But as she sat reading a book, a loud but low rumbling came through the thick walls and intruded on the quiet she’d drawn around her like a blanket. Getting up from the sofa, she went to the window to see a long line of motorcycles filling the driveway. There must have been over eighty of them out there!
Stunned, Jacqui stood at the window and watched as one of the men got off of his bike and came to the door. A dark haired man dressed in the typical black leather pounded on the door and adjusted his privates, swiping a hand across his nose before jiggling the brass door knob. Jacqui felt a sneer form on her face as she looked down at the man. He wasn’t handsome, far from it, and he looked like he needed a wash. She wanted to move away but she knew something was about to happen. Why else would so many people be with him?
Cade soon exited through the front door. His much taller stature and broader shoulders must have intimidated the other man because Snotty took a step down from the steps and went back to his bike. Cade looked down at the assembled people and spoke. Jacqui couldn’t hear what he said because his back was facing her but she could read the other man’s response. She’d learned to read lips as part of her training as a very special kind of escort and used the skill now.
“We ask for sanctuary, Cade. The Phlebos are working with the Mungons and their war is spreading. We don’t want any part of it. We like secrets hidden away, just where they are, much like you and your clan. We’d like to seek shelter with you. The Mungons came and demanded we pay tribute and join them. We left and came here.” The man, whose face was covered in facial hair, was hard to understand, but Jacqui caught the gist of most of it through the closed window.
She didn’t see Cade’s response but saw his shoulders tense and felt confusion as he shook his head no. The bikers with the man didn’t look any more sophisticated than he did but they were asking for shelter. She couldn’t believe he’d turn them away like that! Whatever this “war” was they needed refuge. But what if it’s drugs? Maybe they’re trying to draw Cade and his family into some kind of drug war? Jacqui tapped at her teeth with her thumbnail, anxious about the whole situation.
“What do you mean we’ve been killing your sheep? We haven’t killed anything, we only just arrived today!” The shorter man stared up at Cade with anger and shock, his already tense body now straining towards Cade. “I think you ought to reconsider who you’re turning down, Alexander.”
The man’s words made Cade stiffen this time but he held his ground. Jacqui knew that, ultimately, Cade would make the right decision. He might be cold, unapproachable and hard but everything he did was for his family. If he was turning these people down, it was for good. The man looked up at the window where Jacqui stood and a sick grin spread over his face. Jacqui stepped back into the shadows, feeling dirty just from the man’s gaze.
“Who’s that pretty little bitch?” The man pointed up at the window and Cade followed his finger to see Jacqui’s window. His fist shot out and caught the biker just under his jaw on the right side. The man stumbled but instead of anger, he laughed as he steadied himself. “Somebody important then. Good to know. I’ll remember this Alexander. All of it.”
He gave a final pointing of his finger, this time directly at Cade, before getting back onto his shiny motorcycle to ride away. They drove around the circular area in front of the house and streamed down the driveway. Jacqui felt her anxiety rising and did a mental check of the pills she had. She might need an anti-anxiety pill before this day was over. She watched until the men were all gone then sat down. She realized her hands were shaking and clasped them in her lap. Something about the incident had shaken her and there wasn’t anyone around to calm her fears. Maybe Cade was exactly like her father after all?
The thought terrified her and she pulled up her ice walls, hoping they were somehow much thicker than before. With a tilt of her head and a final look out the window, Jacqui decided it was time to regain control of herself. She couldn’t afford to be weak in this house it seemed.
Cade
Jacqui was asleep when her door opened and a tall form crept into the darkness of her room. The figure walked quietly to her bed, their frame outlined by the light of her alarm clock. He paused, reaching to turn the clock around. The blue light was piercing.
The figure reached out to Jacqui’s face, running a finger lightly down her cheek. He’d done this almost every night since she’d come to Kansas. Cade had even come to her room in New Orleans, though she didn’t know about it. Now he was agitated, worried, and his finger twitched as he ran it down her hair, the silky strands too tempting not to touch. Jacqui moved in her sleep, rolling over to move away from whatever was pulling at her hair.
He saw her stiffen suddenly and knew she was awake. Uh oh.
He tried to sneak out of the door but she rolled over and turned on her light. He thought she’d scream, maybe jump out and hit at him, but she only stared up at him, her eyes clear but cold. He knew that no matter who or what he was, that’s how she’d have met her fate—cold and collected.
For a moment he wondered what had happened in her life that made her so unemotional. He knew her past but he didn’t have the full scope of each moment, of what she must have experienced or the impact those moments must have had on her in her file. Evelyn had provided the major events of Jacqui’s life but that didn’t tell him how her parents treated her, whether she was bullied at school, whether she was reclusive, ebullient, or just what most would call normal. He had no clue who he’d married.
At times like this, when he was stressed the most and wanted a confidant, a companion, he wished he’d taken a little more time to break down thos
e walls of hers. He’d come in to check on her at night and longed to sit with her, to talk to her. He’d seen moments of tenderness on her face, especially around Elspeth and Annie. He wanted to see that look directed at him too.
“What do you want, Cade? Our contract says—”but he interrupted her before she could finish. She’d looked distressed for a moment, did she find him repulsive?
“There’s a little problem I need to take care of. I just wanted to check on you. My apologies for disturbing you.” He moved to walk away, to let her go back to sleep but she made a noise.
She cleared her throat while pushing her hair back. Looking up at him he caught the full brunt of her unguarded gaze and had to fight to hold back a gasp. “Do you want to talk about it?”
He almost said yes, he almost sat on the mattress beside her but he managed to wrestle his self-control back into place.
“No, it’s uh, it’ll work out I’m sure. No worries.” Cade looked away from her as she sat up, her lace gown hiding little from his imagination. He felt as though he was a virgin once again, seeing a nearly nude woman for the first time. Shuffling his feet he started to walk away but she reached out for his hand.
“Why don’t you stay? I saw those men outside earlier. They looked scary, who are they?” Her words were a plea for information, for comfort, and he felt them deep in his chest.
“They’re bad news but nothing we can’t handle. Just a gang trying to elbow into this area. We won’t let them though. We’ve kept out worse things than that bunch.” Cade stood at her side, looking down at her.
“Right. Why don’t you take a seat then? I feel so, I don’t know, small around you when you stand over me.” She waved her hand at the side of the mattress where she moved to make room. He looked over at the sofa on the other side of the room but did as she requested.
“I have Kane and Jadrian out looking over the property, I suspect those people are camping on our land. I can’t settle until they come back. Shall I ring for some coffee?” He picked up the phone to call the maid but she stopped him.
Cade (Alexander Shifter Brothers Book 2) Page 5
