For someone who usually didn’t twitch, he was as jumpy as a cricket. “Is there something I should be asking you about?”
“You can ask me whatever you want.”
“She didn’t see you dead, Zink,” Callon said, shutting down my little game.
“How do you know what I’ve seen?”
Callon was walking in front of me so he couldn’t see the lasers I was shooting into his back. It wasn’t all Callon’s fault that I was mad at him. For the last hour, I’d been preparing for the fight we’d have once he knew he was stuck. In my mind, Callon and I were already battling it. It was hard to be pleasant when you were in mid-fight with someone, even if they didn’t know it.
“If you had, even though he’s an irritating fuck, you wouldn’t screw with him.” His words reeked of confidence, as if he knew me.
He didn’t. He was right, but that didn’t mean anything. It was a lucky guess. I thought of all the things he’d said to me during our imaginary fight, and man, he was irritating sometimes.
“I’m not dying?” Zink asked.
I let out a puff of breath. “Everyone is dying.” His face went white and I knew my fun was over. “But I don’t know when. Your fur and fangs throw off my vision. Now go back to ignoring me, if you don’t mind.” I picked up my pace, but the whistle in my heart was dead.
“Thanks, Teddy.”
“Shut up.”
Zink smiled.
It made me want to punch him.
I increased my steps until I was walking beside Killjoy.
“Shouldn’t we be at the village soon?” I asked, trying to reset my doomsday countdown.
“I’m bringing you to a different one, a little farther away. They’re more likely to take you in,” Callon said, not even glancing at me.
I stopped. “Why didn’t you tell me?”
“Does it matter?” He kept walking.
Of course he didn’t need to tell me. That was what he was saying with his arrogant tone and raised eyebrow. I couldn’t even see his face, but I knew that sucker had climbed up his forehead.
He was really giving me a lot of fuel for the next imaginary fight.
13
A two-and-a-half-story house stood in front of us. It was weathered but tended to, repairs made by pieces salvaged from other places, showing in the different-colored shingles and mismatched windows, every difference adding to its charm.
A wooden plank over the wide porch read, “Jim’s Eat and Sleep.” I’d heard stories of places you could pay to get food and stay over, but I’d never seen one. I hadn’t seen much of anything, so that said more about my travels than the scarcity of these establishments.
But why were we coming here now? Places meant people. People talked. Trees didn’t.
“I’ve always wanted to go to an eat and sleep!” Tuesday skipped beside me, as if she’d been zapped by a bolt of energy that was shooting out of her legs.
I would’ve been more excited myself if I wasn’t planning on the talk with Callon. I’d had too much time to think. I’d gone from why I should be mad at Callon—which was pretty flimsy and easy to poke holes in—to thinking about how angry he was going to be with me. His case was a lot solider. If things went well, it would probably morph into a screaming match. If things didn’t go well, it wouldn’t be my first beating.
Callon walked up onto the front porch of the house, with Hess beside him. Zink hung back, waiting for us. At least one of them always did, as if they thought the boogeyman might jump out of the trees and steal us. In my case, it might happen.
“Why are we stopping here?” I asked Koz, who was at Tuesday’s side more often than not.
“Better to stay here than out in the open until we get some more distance.”
Ah. They’d get more warning if someone came. After what they’d done to the pirates, and the fact that they knew people were looking for me, it made sense. I’d still prefer the trees, but no one was asking my opinion.
“Come on,” Koz said, waving us forward as he went to join Callon and Hess.
Tuesday hung back for a second. “Wait until after we eat. I’ve never gotten to eat in a place like this. I want to see what we get.” She grabbed my arm, dropping her forehead toward me. “If he’s really angry. We. Might. Get. Nothing.” It was quite dramatic for a whisper.
“Sure, not until after dinner.”
It wasn’t a surprise she knew what I was thinking. She’d been staring at me for the last hour of the walk, watching me brew. I’d caught myself mouthing the imaginary argument a couple of times. Luckily, the guys hadn’t noticed and I hadn’t said the words aloud.
“Good.” She let go of my arm and skipped after Koz.
I glanced back at Zink, who flung his hand toward the door in a hurry it up gesture. But he wasn’t rolling his eyes. That was extreme patience for him. The two of us might be making progress.
I walked through the door and Callon was right inside, as if he were waiting for me or something. The din of conversation leaked into the hallway, so I was somewhat prepared for the packed room. It was mostly men, dingy from the road, with a smattering of women here and there, some lacking an entire outfit. A large man with an apron around his waist was placing dishes down and collecting coin as he did. A young woman, who might’ve been his daughter from the matching freckles and ginger hair, was right behind him, filling tankards.
All looked toward us.
No. I couldn’t tell Callon in here even if I wanted to. He wouldn’t care if the place was packed and he made a scene. He wouldn’t care what people thought of him. He did what he wanted, and fuck opinions. They may not have even registered.
If this was going to get ugly, I was better off doing it outside and in private. Maybe a good fifty feet away, in some thick brush that would muffle the noise. I should probably lead by telling him he couldn’t kill me, although that would be a bluff. The witch hadn’t said anything about that.
It would be ugly, and deservedly so. I’d chained him to me. Not indefinitely, but she’d said for a year. A year could feel like a lifetime when you were barely into the sentence.
It was uncomfortable sitting on this side of the scales. I was used to being the wronged one—not the wrongdoer. I almost wished I could talk to Baryn and ask how he dealt with the guilt, except I wasn’t sure he’d ever been afflicted with that pesky side effect. The bottom line was that I needed to survive and I’d taken the opportunity that had presented itself.
Callon pointed at a table in the corner, the only one available. Koz made his way over, with Tuesday happy as could be on his heels. I followed as well, trying to avoid the looks I was getting. The scars were gone but they still stared, like they knew I was different or something. Probably the hair. I should’ve left the mud on it, but it was itchy, so we’d both washed it off at the next stream after the bridge, while Zink and Hess had washed off their own grime of a redder nature.
I went to take a chair, but Callon’s hand on my back pushed me forward until I was in the corner. It was the spot I’d been avoiding, in case someone in here spotted me and there was a need for a quick getaway. There wouldn’t be now with Callon blocking me in. Wasn’t so bad. It wasn’t like anyone could ID me with the way he was sitting.
The man in the apron came over and Callon ordered whatever he was serving, some venison something or other, and a table full of ale. Tuesday was nearly bouncing in her seat as I sat there in dread of what would follow the meal.
Hess turned to me with a forced smile. “You’re going to like the village we’re bringing you to. Decent folk. We’ve traded with them on and off.”
I nodded. This wasn’t helping my nerves. Tuesday looked like she was on a date with Koz. Other than ordering food, Callon didn’t speak. Zink didn’t talk much to begin with, and tonight was no different.
Hess continued to wax on about how great this new village was and how nice all the people were, forcing conversation upon me. It wasn’t like him at all, and I finally realized what it was about.
/> “I didn’t see yours either. Like I said before, I can’t see past the whole…” I tapped a finger to my pointy tooth. Hopefully, that would end all the chitchat directed toward me.
“Oh, yeah, that’s good to know, but I really do like the village.” He took a swig of ale that the girl had just placed in front of him.
“Yeah, they’re great people over there,” Zink said, rolling his eyes and buying the bull even less than I was.
“They are,” Hess said, losing the happy-go-lucky persona that fit him about as well as a sock on a fish.
“I think you mean she’s a great gal. That’s the only one you’ve ever talked to for more than five minutes in the whole place. Actually, have you spoken to her for more than five? Or is it the banging that lasts only five?” Zink asked it as if it were a genuine question.
Zink and Hess soon ignored me, arguing as we waited for food that came out too quick and too lukewarm. I choked it down, not tasting anything, as they all talked amongst themselves.
All except Callon and me. He was watching me, and I didn’t think it was because I was eating. I pretended he wasn’t.
I struggled through the meal and then said I needed to step outside for some privacy, Tuesday tagging along. Koz got up, shadowing us to the door, and I found myself missing Callon as we crossed the room. He seemed to be better at redirecting stares than Koz. Maybe it was because he looked more likely to kill you. That might be a bad thing, considering the fight to come.
I’d barely cleared the trees when I asked Tuesday, “How do you think this will go when I tell him?”
“I thought you had to pee?” she asked.
“I had to get out of there. He knows something’s up. It’s like he’s got a line directly to my brain or something.”
“It’ll be okay. He won’t hurt you,” she said. For a good friend, she sounded quite blasé about the whole thing.
I leaned against a tree as she checked for poison ivy before finding a good spot to squat.
“If it goes badly, don’t get involved.” I banged my head back against the bark.
“It won’t. He steps in front of you all the time.”
“Huh?” She was done peeing before I finally came to my senses. “No, he doesn’t.”
“Yes, he does. He did it tonight when we walked in the place. I’ve noticed the trend.” She walked back over to me. “You know what the nicest part is?”
“What?” I asked, even as I told myself this was ridiculous.
She paused for a second, like she did when she was about to get whimsical. Then her voice got all soft as she said, “He did it even before you were healed. I was thinking about this while we were eating. When we were at the Gathering, and he was bringing you to the witch, I saw the way he was carrying you, like he was shielding you from everyone.”
I let her fanciful idea dance around in my head for a few seconds, relishing in how great it would be if that were true. To live in Tuesday’s world must be nice, where there was true love and unicorns prancing in the forest. Rainbows with big pots of gold and happily-ever-afters.
But that wasn’t the real world, the one most of us knew. There was nothing soft about my voice as I replied, “You’re so crazy right now that I can’t believe I’m the one who sees death.”
She let out a long sigh, one that reeked of poor, clueless Teddy. “You might know all about the bad stuff, but you aren’t so good at seeing anything else.”
“Let’s go back. I’ve got to get this over with. I can’t take another minute.”
When we turned back toward the eat and sleep, Callon was already outside. Tuesday’s shoulder bumped mine “accidentally” as she walked past me, her version of punching me in the arm for good luck. She continued to the porch, giving me an it’ll be okay smile before she disappeared inside.
I stopped in front of him. “Could I talk to you for a minute?”
His eyes narrowed as he nodded. Those eyes read too much. I didn’t know this guy, but he acted like he knew me. It was all guesses, but he was the best guesser I’d ever met.
I shook off my nerves, imagining myself to be a grand oak tree. I might lose some branches but I’d weather this storm, as I had so many others.
I tilted my head away from the house. “Do you mind?”
If this went bad, I preferred my fights in private, or at least the ones I was sure to lose. Back at the village, I’d never had the choice. Baryn or Turrock would regularly drag me out into the center of everyone, a spectacle for all. They thought it made them look tough that they weren’t scared of the girl who saw death.
He followed me to a small clearing just beyond the trees. A crow swooped down, landing on a branch and cawing. Then another joined it. If Callon wasn’t there, I would’ve shooed them away. I’d come out here so I didn’t have an audience. The twosome cawed in unison, looking down at me, as if they were saying I was stuck with them.
He stopped a few feet from me and then waited.
He probably thought I was going to plead or beg for him to take me with him. Even if I’d never met Hera, and there had been no spell, there would never be any pleading and begging from me.
I knew men, all sorts of them. Some were weak of body but strong of mind, and some had it the other way around. Some were just weak in everything. Once in a blue moon, there was someone like Callon. He wouldn’t crack; there were no weak spots. The fact that he’d relented as much as he had for Koz said more about how close he was with his men than about a soft spot. It spoke of loyalty. I hadn’t known many men his type, but I knew in my gut how he was going to feel about what I’d done.
I toyed with a branch.
“Teddy?” His eyes stayed fixed on my face, trying to get a read on what he sensed was off.
“You’re going to have to take me with you.” I broke the branch with my fingers, not meaning to.
“And why is that?” he asked, taking a step forward.
I had such a bad case of cold feet that I might as well be standing in ice water. “You can’t leave without me. The witch, Hera, she did something.” I blurted it out so fast that I wasn’t sure he understood what I’d said.
He stood so frozen that he had either the utmost control or he was on the verge of losing it. Probably a combination of the two. I would’ve thought that the temperature had suddenly dropped to negative thirty. Or maybe it was the ice pumping through my veins, chilled by my frozen feet as I steeled myself for the eventual reaction from the wild beast who’d discovered he’d been trapped.
Trapped. It was a horrible word, and a worse reality. I knew what it felt like firsthand, and yet I’d done it to him. He was going to hate me, maybe kill me, and I didn’t blame him. There was no going back. The witch was long gone. I’d made my choice and now I was going to live with it. Or die because of it.
“What are you talking about?” he asked, so slowly, his words so distinct, it was impossible to feign misunderstanding.
My heart pounded out the seconds. “You can’t leave me behind. You can’t go more than a few miles away from me.”
He was staring at me, speechless.
“It’s only for a year or so. Not forever.”
“Hera told you this? And you believed her?”
“Yes.”
He threw back his head and laughed. Somehow, that laughter sounded like a fuck you.
“I don’t know what you gave her or how you convinced her—”
“I wasn’t trying to—”
He took a step forward, and I quickly turned my head to the side. If he attacked anything like Baryn, he’d go for my face first.
I waited a few seconds, but the blow didn’t come. I turned back to him, squinting. He shook his head, as if disgusted even further by me.
He wasn’t going to hit me?
His jaw was tensed, the tendons in his neck corded as he disregarded my shock.
“It doesn’t matter if you weren’t trying to screw me. That witch doesn’t have the magical chops to pull it off, and she wo
uld’ve needed something of mine to do it.”
He was wrong on all counts. I’d seen what had happened inside that tent. That woman had more magic than he could even imagine. And he was wrong about her not having something of his. He’d been carrying me for hours. I’d had one of his hairs on me.
I started chewing on the side of my cheek. Did I agree with him that there was no way Hera had pulled it off, or let him figure it out on his own that she had? I hadn’t planned on having to convince him I’d screwed him over. It didn’t look like he was going to believe me anyway.
If I were that oak tree, his eyes would’ve set me on fire and then nailed me to the ground where I stood. He shook his head one time. The slightest movement, but there was something so powerful in it that it nearly brought me to my knees. That small shake had been packed full of condemnation, judgment—disgust. That was all it took to feel like I was the lowest of the low. I’d had so many things I’d planned on saying and yet I couldn’t utter a word. He’d slayed me with that one look. A punch would’ve hurt less. I wasn’t even pond scum, but whatever fed off it.
He turned and walked away.
“Callon.” He didn’t pause or acknowledge he’d heard me call him. I didn’t know what else to say as I watched his back. An apology would fall miles short.
I’d been prepared for rage, maybe a beating. Not this. He went back to the eat and sleep. He walked through the door while I was still rooted to the same spot.
My entire past was filled with not being able to do what I wanted. But I’d always known what I wanted to do. This was the first time I had a choice and was stumped. After a couple of deep breaths, I forced myself forward, not sure what would happen when I caught up to him.
I was only a few feet from the front steps when Callon walked back out. He went past me as if I were a ghost. The guys followed, looking from him to me, trying to figure out what had happened. Tuesday was last out the door, following them.
Koz looked from Callon to where I stood, silent and suddenly no longer a part of the group. It was the strangest feeling, since I didn’t know I’d been part of a group to begin with. Maybe you never do until you’re on the outside looking in.
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