by Kailin Gow
Max smiled. “We should start a business,” she said, half-joking. “Financial planning for vampires – long-term investments.” She smiled softly.
Kalina beamed with pride as her mother strode up to the hotel reception. Whatever else she was or wasn’t, Max was brave, Kalina thought. She hadn’t let any vampire – or any other man, for that matter – get in the way of her mission. Kalina had known her for weeks now, and in that time she’d never learned a thing about her mother’s thoughts, about her feelings, about her loves.
All she knew was that she’d rather have Max with her in a crisis than any other person she knew, human or vampire.
“Come on,” said Max, dragging Kalina and Justin behind her. “I ordered the lobster from room service.” She turned to Justin. “Do you need to feed?”
Justin looked embarrassed and Kalina flushed scarlet. Would Justin, too, have to glamour girls into giving up their blood? Kalina could have laughed. Human Justin was too busy with work at the hospital even to think about asking girls out, let alone asking for a pint or two of their blood…
“The vampire wine went down with the plane…” he said. “I guess I don’t have a choice.” He looked at Kalina apologetically, picking up on her expression. “It’s still a little weird to me.”
Kalina sighed. “I guess you’ll just have to glamour someone.” She forced herself to smile. “Come on, Justin. Just spray on a little cologne and strike up a conversation…”
“Nice shoes – can I drink your blood?” Even with his vampire pallor, Justin was blushing. “I don’t even know where to start. Stuart’s had hundreds of years to perfect his whole smooth-vampire act…”
Stuart gave Justin a teasing shove. “Just tell them you’re Edward Cullen.”
Justin rolled his eyes. Kalina couldn’t help but smile. Vampire or no vampire, she thought, Justin was definitely still her adorable, awkward older brother. And Stuart still knew how to make her laugh.
Stuart put a hand on Kalina’s shoulder. “I know it’s hard for all of us to get used to,” he said softly. “But Justin didn’t choose this life – just like I didn’t choose it. It’s the best of a bad situation.”
“Can’t you just drink from me?” Kalina asked. “I mean – obviously I love you, you’re my brother. I can’t imagine my blood would drive you crazy…”
“I don’t want to risk it,” said Justin. “We don’t really understand how Life’s Blood works. Obviously love is part of it…but if it has to be that kind of love, well, no offense sis, but…gross!”
“He can drink from me,” said Stuart. “I’m willing – I’m rested after having Kalina’s blood. And he doesn’t have to glamour me either.” He laughed, baring his neck and assuming an expression of mock seduction that made Kalina and Justin alike burst into laughter. “And I’ll know when to stop you – I know when it gets dangerous.”
“This – uh – this won’t affect our friendship, will it?” Justin looked a little nervous. “Could you guys maybe give us some privacy?”
Max stood up. “Let’s go into the other room, Kalina.” She led Kalina into the adjacent room of the suite.
“Well, it’s a solution for now,” she said, “but we can’t use Stuart as a built-in feeding unit for Justin forever; we’ll have to get our hands on some wine. Or else he’ll have to start to feed on humans.” She sat next to Kalina on the bed. “It must be strange, I know. To have someone you love become a vampire.” She took Kalina’s hand and squeezed it. “It’s one thing, I suppose, with Jaegar and Octavius – you knew they were vampires from the beginning. But with Justin…”
Kalina sighed. “Yeah,” she admitted. “It’s pretty weird. But Justin’s got to keep up his strength if we’re going to find Octavius and Jaegar.” She blushed and looked down, embarrassed. Would her mother think her weak for her worry?
But Max only put an arm around Kalina’s shoulder. “I know how much you care for them,” she said. “Remember, I loved a vampire once, too. It’s not easy – a life on the run, a life of fear. But the love is worth it. I saw Octavius on the plane, Kalina. He was fighting the effects of that Life’s Blood – he was trying to beat it. For you. He really loves you, Kalina; I can see it in his eyes. And Jaegar too. They’re strong, Kalina,” she said. “We’ll be able to beat it…”
“Mom…” Kalina began, but her voice trailed off. There was still something so strange in using those words. It reminded her of another “mom” – another time in Hawaii. She’d only been ten years old, maybe eleven, and her parents – her adoptive parents, to be sure, but nevertheless her real parents, had taken her and Justin on a summer vacation.
She caught sight of the beach out the window, of the Pacific Ocean gently rolling out at their feet, and stopped short.
“What is it?” Max stood up.
Kalina looked back at Max. “Nothing, only…”
“Only?”
“Mom,” Kalina said again with a sad laugh. “You. Mom. I mean, you are my mother, I know that. But you’re not…my mother.”
“You’re speaking of…”
“I know she wasn’t biologically related to me. But she raised me – both of us, me and Justin. She felt like my mother. And my dad, too. It’s been two years since they died, and I still feel this absence – like they’ve just gone down the street to buy milk or something and they’ll be right back any minute.” Kalina looked out the window. “We came here once, you know. To Hawaii. My mom and dad made this huge sand castle just for me and Justin to play in. They spent all day making it and then at the very end of the day before the tide came in we got to climb up onto some beach chairs and jump on the castle and demolish it before the waves got it.” She smiled bitterly. “Funny, isn’t it? I’ve lost a lot of people to vamps lately – but Mom and Dad…it was a car crash.”
Max looked pensive. At last she spoke. “I knew them,” she said. “I trusted them – that’s why I chose them to take care of you, when it was too dangerous for me to do so. And I wasn’t wrong. They did a great job with you, Kalina. Every day, when I look at you, I am so grateful to them for loving you as much as they did. I can see what good parents they were when I look at how you – and Justin – turned out. You were their daughter, Kalina – even if blood didn’t link you. You still are their daughter. But you’re mine, too. And I can never thank them enough for what they did for my girl.”
Max’s eyes were shining with tears now, but she wiped them away quickly. Before Kalina could respond, they were interrupted by a knock at the door.
“I’m all fed,” Justin said. “You can come back in now.” He entered. “I was thinking we’d maybe go for a walk along the beach once the sun sets.” He turned to Kalina. “Maybe…build a sand castle?”
“You remembered.” Kalina walked over to her brother. “I wasn’t sure you would.”
“Of course I remembered,” said Justin. “I lifted you up and pretended to use you as a cannonball…”
Good old Justin, Kalina thought gladly. She reached out and took his hand. It felt right, natural to have him there with her. Like the old days.
“You thinking about them, too?” Kalina asked.
Justin nodded. “I think about them a lot,” he said. “But somehow being here makes me think about them more.”
“You both should rest,” said Max. “If the two of you want to take a walk, I can look after Stuart. Make sure he’s recovering. I get that you might need some time alone in this place. To remember. I remember when I lost Constantine…” She stopped and bit her lip. “Well, let’s not talk about that.”
Stuart appeared in the doorway. “If you want to stay a few more days, Kalina – just put it on my credit card. We won’t do any good up against Jaegar and Octavius until you’re rested – until we’re all rested.”
“Agreed,” said Justin.
Kalina slipped her hand into Justin’s and nodded. “Agreed,” she said.
Chapter 5
That night, Kalina and Justin went walking along the beach,
watching the bright pink haze of the sunset spread out in a misty fog over the waters, which reflected the changing colors of pink and gold in the sky. Kalina was in awe at the somber, rich beauty of the place; she could smell honeysuckle and jasmine, the air dripping with the fragrance of honey. When Kalina closed her eyes, she could let the smell bring her back to her childhood, to her memories of her parents, of Justin as a boy…
“Hey Kal…” Justin looked out over the sea. “Do you think we’ll ever have that now?”
“Have what?”
“Kids. Families of our own.” Justin looked glum. “I mean, vampires don’t age, right? And they can’t have kids…”
“No, I guess not,” said Kalina.
“I never thought about kids,” said Justin. “Always figured I was too young to want them. I guess now I’ll always be too young for them.”
“Not always,” said Kalina. “You could find someone. A Carrier.”
“Like Alice-Suzanne…?” Justin fell silent. “I bet she’s okay. I bet Octavius and Jaegar were able to get her to safety. They’re strong. They wouldn’t let the bloodlust…”
“Let’s not talk about that,” said Kalina, looking out over the sea. “Let’s talk about something else. Right now I want to forget about vampires. Just for a while.”
“What do you want to talk about?”
“Remember the botanical gardens?” Kalina turned to Justin. “Mom wanted to go to the botanical gardens, but Dad wanted to go snorkeling. He gave in, but he was so annoyed he wore his snorkeling gear all through the gardens…”
“And snorkeled in the fountain!” Justin smiled. “Yeah, I remember.”
“Do you think it really was a car crash? Or vampires?”
“I don’t know,” said Justin. “I mean…anything’s possible. I don’t know what’s true and what’s fake anymore.”
“I hope it wasn’t vampires,” Kalina said darkly.
“Why?”
“I just want something,” she said, “some part of our life - that’s not about vampires.”
“Not going to happen anymore, is it?”
“Guess not,” Kalina sighed. “Right now, though – I miss them a lot. More than usual.”
“I miss them too.” Justin took Kalina’s hand. “Do you think they’re in heaven?”
Kalina nodded. “If vampires are real, why shouldn’t heaven be real?”
“Do you think I’ll ever get there? If I’m a vampire.”
“You’d have to ask Stuart.”
“He’s a good guy, Stuart.”
“He is,” Kalina said softly, “but not for me.”
“I know. But for somebody. I guess it’s good I don’t have to compete with him over Life’s Blood Carriers. Not that I ever would. He only ever had eyes for you.”
“Maybe he’ll find someone else now,” said Kalina. “I hope he does.”
“You won’t be jealous?”
“I’ll probably be jealous,” Kalina admitted, “but I’d also be happy for him. It’d be the right thing to do.”
Justin put his arm around Kalina. “Mom’d be proud of you,” he said. “She was always saying you were so pretty you’d grow up to be a heartbreaker.”
Kalina laughed and assumed her mother’s voice “But just because you can break hearts, my dear, doesn’t mean you should. Any woman can be a heartbreaker. But you – you should be something better. You should be a heart-fixer.”
Justin smiled. “Heart-fixer. That’s what Mom was.”
“It’s funny – she’s the opposite of Max.” Perky, plump, and permanently cheery, Kalina’s mother had been everything Kalina imagined was conventional for a mother: she baked cookies, told stories, nursed bruises. All things she couldn’t imagine Max doing. But then again, she couldn’t have imagined her mother fighting with an underground resistance group to bring down vampires, either – and she had apparently done that.
“She was pretty brave, huh?”
“Who?”
“Mom. Working for the resistance in Turkey. Fighting vamps.”
“Who would have guessed it?” Justin laughed.
“Remember at Thanksgiving – when you tried beer for the first time and came home drunk and burned the turkey?”
“Yeah,” Justin concluded. “I could imagine her going all Bruce Wayne on a few vamps. If they made her mad enough.”
“If they burned the turkey.”
The next night, as the stars were twinkling all over the night sky, Max and Stuart joined Kalina and Justin on the beach. According to the concierge, a luau had been scheduled for that night, and they followed the flaming torches and the lilting sound of music to a beautiful flower-covered grove, where the other guests were waiting. The music was powerful and passionate – the drum beats seemed to pulse in time with Kalina’s own heart. How beautiful the sound was, she thought! At once thrilling and peaceful.
And then, in the midst of the crowd, Kalina heard a voice.
“Kalina!”
It was low, dark, sensual – and unmistakably his. The force of desire in those three short syllables was enough to floor her utterly. It was Jaegar’s voice; she felt his hot breath on her ear, and her entire body seized up instinctively with desire.
“Jaegar?” she turned around, losing sight of the others in the crowd. “Jaegar, are you there?” She pressed her hand to her pocket, where she kept a stake, and hoped she wouldn’t have to use it.
But she could see no sign of him.
“Jaegar, are you there? The Life’s Blood…”
His voice echoed again within her brain, loud and clear this time. “I’ve missed you so much, my darling. I need you so much. I can’t hold back – I won’t hold back. What I feel for you is too rich, too strong. I’ve wanted you for so long now, and I’ve been waiting so long. I’ve been good. I’ve waited. But I’m done waiting. There is nothing that can stand between us, nobody that can stand against us…” His voice was tinged with the light madness of Life’s Blood, but as much as Kalina tried to fight it that made no difference to her body’s immediate, powerful reaction. Passion flooded through her. He knew exactly how to push her buttons, how to make her crazy with desire, how to make her want him so badly she thought she would burn up faster than the bonfire. There was something about Jaegar that inspired her, that thrilled her – even Octavius, whom she loved with a desperate and hopeless love, couldn’t make her feel so exhilarated, so thrilled…
But she had to stay calm. She had to focus. She had to make sure that Jaegar didn’t get away again.
“Are you here?” she said out loud, but heard no reply. So it was telepathy, then, she reasoned. Jaegar could be anywhere – but he could still get inside her head.
Kalina caught sight of Stuart standing against a tree, looking shaken and pale. “Stuart!” she cried, “we’ve got a problem. I just heard Jaegar just now.”
Stuart nodded. “I did, too,” he said. “He and I have a telepathic connection – still – just because I’m human now doesn’t mean we aren’t brothers.”
“What did he say to you?”
Stuart’s haunted silence more than answered her question. But at last he spoke. “He won’t spare me, he said. Now that I’m human, that I’ve betrayed the cause of the vampire, I deserve to die like one. He said he’d punish me for what I took from him – that you turned me human, that you chose me…he said he’d make me pay. He’s so angry, Kal. Angry at you, at me, at Octavius – I always thought I was jealous of him, but he told me that he was jealous of me and that he’d make me sorry for ever daring…”
He could not go on. Kalina put a hand on his shoulder. “We’ll prepare for him, then. For Jaegar.”
Justin came over. “Did you get a sense of his location?”
“How did you…” Kalina looked at Justin in surprise.
“I heard your conversation from all the way over there.” He pointed across the fire pit. “Vampire hearing’s like that of a wolf – it takes some getting used to.”
Stuart s
hook his head. “He could be anywhere. He could be a hundred miles away and we’d still hear it. He wants to get to us, to torment us – to let us hear just enough…”
“I won’t let him!” Justin said fiercely. “He’s a friend, but Kalina’s my sister – she comes first. I won’t let anyone hurt her.”
“Come on Justin,” said Kalina sadly. “Let’s get back home. We’re not going to find Jaegar or Octavius tonight – we might as well get to the hotel safely and get our rest.”
“I agree,” said Max, coming up alongside them. “Let’s go.”
But later that night, as Kalina wrapped the soft, silky satin bed sheets around her body, Kalina couldn’t get Octavius or Jaegar out of her mind. Her whole body tensed up; she couldn’t sleep, for every time she started to doze off, it seemed that Jaegar’s face would appear before her – beautiful as ever, but distorted by a look of anger, of hunger, of hatred in his eyes. She had to find him, she thought darkly to herself – before either he hurt someone she loved, or got hurt himself. This cold, cruel creature couldn’t be the real Jaegar, she told herself. The Jaegar she knew, the Jaegar she cared for, was loyal; he was strong. He would never hurt her. He’d been turned back from the brink of Life’s Blood before, she told herself – and he could be turned back again. She had to find him in time. If she could only find him in time…
