by Abby Brooks
“What do you think about going to pick up your things today?”
Her eyes go wide and she drops them to her phone before dragging them to meet mine. “I’m not ready to face him.”
I can only imagine the kinds of things he said to her in those texts.
“I get that. But I’m thinking that it might be a good idea to rip off the bandage, you know? Just get in, get your stuff, and get out. No lingering.” I smile. “Plus, I might want that shirt back sometime.” That’s a lie. I love seeing her in my clothes. She can wear one of my shirts every day and I wouldn’t complain.
Ashley looks down at her phone and sighs heavily. “That all sounds good in theory, but he’s kind of lost his mind right now. I don’t know if me being there is a good idea at all.”
“Does he work today?”
“Even if he was on the schedule, he won’t go in. He doesn’t need much of a reason to call off work.”
I don’t like seeing her afraid of this guy. My instinct is to drive her over there and walk in and punch the asshole in the face. That’s what he deserves for being a whiny, manipulative little bitch. But, seeing as how I’m a dad now and getting hit with assault charges isn’t exactly being the kind of role model my Bug deserves, I need to opt out of the whole ‘giving him what he deserves’ deal. Plus, Ashley is the one who needs to take the power back in this relationship. She needs to stand up to the jerk for her own psychological well-being. The only one who feels better if I go in fists flying is me.
“Come on,” I say, stepping through the door. “Let’s get your stuff.”
Ashley shakes her head. “I’m not ready. Not even a little.”
“Yeah you are. Have you forgotten how strong you are?” I reach a hand out to her. “Because I haven’t.”
She studies my hand for a few long seconds. It feels like I’m trying to coax a wild animal into trusting me. I stay calm and patient and still until she finally lets her breath out in a rush and unfolds her legs.
“Okay,” she says as she takes my hand. “But I can promise you this will be ugly. Do you think your aunt will watch Georgia so she doesn’t end up emotionally traumatized by what she sees?”
Turns out, Aunt Diane is basically running a daycare today. Over the course of the morning, all my cousins have called to ask if she could watch their kids. While my aunt couldn’t be more thrilled to get Georgia over to meet them all, I’m not so sure how I feel about it. My Bug hasn’t had a whole lot of opportunity to play with other kids. While I think it would be really good for her to start making some friends, I’m not sure I want her to make a lot of strong connections here if we’re not going to stay.
But Ashley is right. If there’s any kind of scene today, Georgia doesn’t need to be there to see it. Battling down my reservations, I thank my aunt and tell her we’ll be there soon. When we get to my aunt and uncle’s house and Georgia sees all the kids in the yard her enthusiasm obliterates the rest of my worry. She bolts out of the car as soon as she’s unhooked from her car seat, leaving her kissy shell behind.
Ashley is quiet on the way to her apartment, chewing on her fingernails and staring out the window. Mother Nature put on one hell of a show for us this morning, with the sun reaching down from its spot in the sky, touching the sea and sending a shower of sparkles out over the waves. I don’t think Ashley’s even seeing it though. Her mind is a million miles away. I follow her directions to the apartment, in awe to find the roads so wide open, so empty they’re almost abandoned. Combine that with the vast expanse of sea and sky and I can’t decide if it’s unsettling or peaceful. After eight years of learning the hustle and bustle of the city, Bliss is one hell of a change.
Ashley sits forward in her seat as I park in front of the dated building she used to call home. She peers through the windshield, jaw dropped, tears forming in her eyes. “What the hell?”
Spread out over the little patch of grass that separates the building from the lot is a massive pile of what used to be clothes and books and other odds and ends that make up someone’s personal belongings. Ashley struggles with her seatbelt as I put the car in park and is outside before I’ve even killed the engine. As she approaches the pile, one hand flies to cover her nose.
I climb out of the car as Ashley paces and am immediately hit with a stench so foul it makes me flinch and take a step back. The asshole pissed and shit all over her stuff. But that’s not all. He shredded her clothes and tore the pages out of her books. Broken pieces of wood might have once been a jewelry box and the glittering bits of metal were probably once her jewelry. Nothing in this pile is salvageable. Nothing.
Color drains from Ashley’s face. The hand over her mouth trembles so hard I’m afraid she’s on the verge of passing out. Then she takes one wavering step towards the pile and I know she’s on the verge of passing out. I grab her shoulders to steady her and she sags into my arms. Turns into me and buries her face in my chest.
“He’s such an asshole,” she whispers.
Over the top of her head, I see his moon-shaped face peering through the window at us, spite and jealousy gleaming in his beady eyes. “Don’t let him see you like this,” I whisper into her hair. She tenses against me. “Show him how strong you are, Sunshine.” The urge to press a kiss into her hair is almost more than I can manage, but now is not the time or the place for me and my selfish urges.
Ashley straightens and pulls out of my arms. She surveys the pile and shakes her head. “I truly have nothing.” Her voice quakes a little and she keeps it low enough so the asshole can’t hear what she’s saying. Her posture is strong though, and her face is neutral enough to hide the roar of emotions I see raging in her eyes.
“You’ve got me,” I say before I can think better of it.
A smile pulls up the corners of her mouth. “I guess that’s worth something.”
“You better believe it.” I want to take her hand but I don’t. Her ex needs to see her standing on her own right now. Not clinging to me. “Besides. Now you can truly start over. You’re building your life from scratch.”
“I’m building my life out of nothing.”
“Sometimes, that’s the best way. Scrap it all and start over.”
She looks up at me, fear and excitement mingling in her teary eyes. “Thank you.”
“Don’t thank me, silly. Just give that asshole the finger already so we can get out of here.”
Ashley grins and does just that, spinning towards the window and throwing up a middle finger before she loops an arm around my waist. I lead her back to the car, open the door for her and close it once she’s safely inside. She keeps her shit together until we’re about five minutes down the road then she starts laughing and doesn’t stop until she’s crying. I pull over to the side of the road, unbuckle my seatbelt, and lean across the space between our seats to take her in my arms. It’s awkward, but she doesn’t seem to care. She leans into me the best she can as her breath hitches and gasps.
“I am so screwed,” she finally manages. “No money. No clothes. No nothing.”
“That’s not true. I meant what I said. You’ve got me. And I know a little bit about starting over from less than zero.” I run a hand through her hair. “You’re gonna get through this. No. We’re gonna get through this. You’re better off today than you were yesterday.”
“How?”
“Because all the shit you were just talking about can be replaced. You’ll make more money and then you can buy new clothes. Before you know it, you’ll have your own place and all the things you need to fill it up. That’s just a matter of time and patience.”
“But how does that mean I’m better off? Just sounds like I’ve got some hard times ahead of me.”
I nod and go right ahead and press a kiss into her hair. Fuck it. She needs it and I want it and we can deal with the complicated stuff later. “Because, Sunshine.” I pull back enough so she can meet my eyes. “Now you can focus on taking care of you. On figuring out who you are and what you want. That g
uy? He was busy sucking the soul out of you. All that material stuff can be replaced. You’re what’s important here.”
“I haven’t been happy in so long.”
“Well, then. Just think how happy you’re going to feel when you’ve gotten through this low point.” I run my hand along her arm, trying to be soothing. I’m in such dangerous territory. Ashley is addictive, the more I get, the more I want.
“Thank you, Jackson.”
“For what?”
“For you. For being here, ready to put me back together again.”
“I’m just glad I showed up before that asshole broke you completely.” I kiss her forehead, her skin just as soft as I remembered it, and then sit up. “Now, what better way to celebrate your freedom than a shopping trip?”
Ashley protests like crazy but she should know better than to try and talk me out of something once I’ve gotten my mind set on it. We finally agree that she can pay me back by helping me organize the Halloween party. After a quick call to Diane to check on Georgia, I take Ashley out and buy her enough clothes to get through a week and still have a few items hanging in the closet in case of an emergency. There’s nothing too fancy in there, but you’d think I just saved a puppy from a burning building, judging from the way she gushes with gratitude. I can’t even begin to imagine how she’ll act when she gets the jewelry and new Kindle I ordered for her while she was in the dressing room trying things on.
The next couple days pass in a blur of happiness and laughter. Ashley has taken over doing Georgia’s hair and damn if she doesn’t make it look easy. Bug seems more and more comfortable with Ashley here and has even started asking for kisses at bedtime. Ashley hesitates at first, always careful not to overstep the boundaries with my daughter. I’m kind of at a loss. It’s good to see Georgia with another woman, but I can’t help but worry that this is just one more person who’s going to disappear from her life. I always said that if I started dating, I wouldn’t bring Georgia into the mix until I was sure we had something special between us. Ashley and I aren’t even dating and here she is creating a little space for herself in Bug’s heart. It’s enough to keep me awake at night, that’s for sure.
Tonight, Ashley and I are staying late at Fantastic Sam’s while Georgia stays the night with Frank and Diane. While she works with the other waitress to get the chairs put up on the tables and get the place shut down, I dig through the papers spread over my desk for the receipts listing the items I bought for the party. I pretty much just ordered everything I could find that looked remotely Halloween themed and figured I’d throw the decorations up on the wall and the snacks out on the bar and call it a party. Ashley didn’t seem pleased with that idea and promised me she’d turn all this junk into one hell of an event.
Finally, I hear her saying goodnight to everyone else before she pokes her head through the door to the office. “You ready to do this?” I haven’t seen her look this amped since I got back.
I pretend to stifle a yawn. “I’m pretty pooped. How about we just head home and do this later.”
“No way. We are planning a party tonight, and that’s that.”
She pulls a chair up beside me and starts going through the lists of items, jotting everything down on different pages in a notebook she brought just for tonight. I watch her work, loving the way she pauses as she thinks, biting her bottom lip between her teeth. Fucking hell. I would so rather it was me capturing that lip with my teeth. Running my hands through that hair. Torturing her nipples with my tongue. I’ve pretty much been walking around with an erection ever since she moved in and I don’t know how much longer I can take it. At first I thought I was the only one feeling the tension between us, but now I think she’s feeling it, too. I keep wondering what she’d do if I kissed her. Would she haul off and slap me or would she melt into me?
“Earth to Jackson.” Ashley leans in close and waves a hand in front of my eyes. “What are you thinking about?”
“It’s a secret.” My eyes go to her mouth and my dick presses against the zipper in my jeans. I’m not going to be able to ignore whatever this is between us much longer.
Ashley licks her lips. “I like secrets.” There’s something in her voice, something heavy and sweet and raw. I drag my gaze from her mouth and find her eyes hooded with lust. She puts one hand on my thigh and that’s all I can stand. I reach out, press my palm to her cheek, thread my fingers into her hair, and pull her in for a kiss.
Chapter Seven
The kiss reaches deep down into the very marrow of my bones. The pen drops from my fingers, totally forgotten, and I run my hands up his arms, at once so familiar and yet, thanks to the corded muscles and tendons, not familiar at all. My body responds to him as if we were together just yesterday. As if there isn’t an ocean of time separating who we were from who we are. As if there was never anyone for me but him.
Jackson pulls back just enough to part our lips. “I’m sorry,” he says and I want to laugh at him for apologizing for something so beautiful.
“I’m not.” I kiss him again, reveling in his taste, his touch, his smell. My muscles clench and my breath quickens and I need his hands on me, now. I need him to remind me what it means to be wanted. Need burns deep in my belly and lust pools between my legs.
Jackson runs his hands up under my shirt, grazing my ribs and cupping my breasts. I moan into his mouth, already lost to him. “Ashley.” He murmurs my name against my lips, kissing down the curve of my jaw, nibbling along the lines of my throat.
He’s holding back, touching me like he’s afraid I might break, like I might crumble to dust if he moves too fast. I need him to let go. To lose control of himself and take control of me. To touch me like he used to. Uninhibited. Wild. Free.
“Take me, Jackson.” I slide my hands up his thighs, squeezing the firm muscle encased in his jeans before I reach the bulge of his cock. “Don’t hold back. Not with me.”
“You don’t know what you’re asking,” Jackson says, his voice a low growl. “I have to hold back.” He lifts my shirt and nips and bites at my nipple through my bra.
“Not with me.”
He peers through his eyebrows, his eyes on fire. “I’m purely wicked, Sunshine. You don’t want to go there with me.”
I bite my lip and lift my eyebrows. “Try me.” I run my fingers into his hair as his eyes go dark. “We’re not strangers. I know you like it rough. Remind me what it means to feel something.”
Jackson stands, pulling me to my feet right along with him. He yanks my shirt over my head as I fiddle with the button on his pants. Our clothes fall into a pile on the floor, piece by piece until we’re finally naked in front of each other for the first time in eight years. He’s the most beautiful thing I’ve ever seen.
“You want to feel something?” Jackson takes my jaw between his thumb and middle finger and lifts my face to his. With his other hand, he slaps my thigh. “Spread your legs.”
I do as he says and am rewarded by his finger dipping inside me, slicking along my folds, and rubbing ever so gently against my clit. His touch is nothing more than a whisper and I need more friction, more sensation. I’ve missed having a man who knows how to make my body sing. I quiver and clench in anticipation.
He draws his lazy circles on my clit with one hand while holding my jaw in place with the other, staring down at me with so much intensity that I forget the last eight years. Anxiety fades as tension builds in my core. Nothing else matters because I’m here now, with him, where I know I’ll be taken care of. Where I’m safe and wanted. He’ll pleasure me and leave me begging for more. Sated and starving in the same breath.
“Are you about to come?” Jackson lifts an eyebrow.
I nod, my voice lost somewhere in my held breath.
“Don’t you dare come without my permission.”
His voice alone is enough to send me over the edge. All these years, this is what I’ve been missing. Someone who knows me, who takes control of me, who isn’t afraid of being a real man.
/>
“Please, Jackson. Can I come?” And just like that, I give into the pleasure, eyes rolling back into my head.
“No.” He pulls his hands away and my gaze snaps to his. “I want to feel your pussy clench around my cock.”
Jackson clears the papers on his desk, sweeping everything to the side into one massive pile, and then helps me up so my ass is perched on the very edge. He steps into me and then stops.
“Fuck. I don’t have a condom.”
“I’m not on the pill.” Cain hated the idea of me being on birth control. Somehow, he thought that meant it would be easier for me to cheat.
Jackson pauses with the head of his dick pressed against my opening, his eyes on mine. “I guess that means I’ll just have to cum somewhere else.” And then he slides into me, stretching me, filling me. I tilt my head back and moan.
“Shit. You feel so good,” I say, my words rushing out all in one long breath.
“Yeah?” Jackson slides his hips back, so far that his cock comes completely out of me. “Do you like that?” he asks as he thrusts forward again.
Sensation decimates my words. He had me so close to coming with his fingers that I’m about to explode all over his cock. He rocks his hips into mine, so maddeningly slow that I wrap my legs around him and press my heels into his ass, urging him to pick up the pace.
“Please,” I manage. “I need to come.”
Jackson smiles down at me. “All you had to do was ask.” He grabs my waist and slams into me again and again, driving me right on over the edge. Years of tension and stress evaporate. The world spins and quakes as Jackson continues his relentless pace. I am nothing and I am everything and it’s like my whole life was leading up to this moment. Our reunion. Jackson lets go of my waist to tweak my nipple, pinching and rolling hard. Pain blends with pleasure and I cry out in ecstasy.
“Fuck,” growls Jackson. “I’m gonna cum.” He pulls out of me. “Open your mouth.”
I slide off the desk and take his cock between my lips. He cums in two hot spurts, crying out and fisting his hands in my hair. When he finishes, I pull back and swallow, wiping my mouth on the back of my hand.
