The very same evening, she wrote to Beryl, enclosing a sum of money that was sufficient for her to return home. At least some good might come of the sorry mess she found herself in, Adina thought sadly, if she was able to get Beryl away from her tyrannical husband.
When she had finished, she rang Ariel. Her sister was the only close family that Adina had left now, and hearing her voice gave her a small measure of comfort.
She spent all her free time during the next ten days cleaning the house from top to bottom, but even though she kept herself busy Adina’s thoughts were always with her baby. The pain of separation cut deep. She knew that the hurt would never truly go away, but still she convinced herself that she would find her somehow. At last she was satisfied that all was ready for Beryl’s arrival. She had no idea if her friend would come by sea or air, or even when she would arrive – and so now she resumed her search.
With every day that passed, her spirits sank a little lower. Every time she so much as stepped out of the door she would instantly scan the streets for a sight of Theo’s car but she never once saw it.
By the end of July 1946 she had lost a tremendous amount of weight, not that it mattered to her, for she no longer cared how she looked. All she wanted was to find her child.
And then one Saturday morning at the beginning of September, a knock sounded on the front door. It echoed through the house as she hurried to answer it, wondering who it could be. The builders had finished work on the roof now and she wasn’t expecting anyone.
Inching the door open cautiously, she peered out to find a woman clutching a baby closely to her on the top step. ‘Hello, may I help you?’ she asked politely, and then as realisation dawned on her she gasped, ‘Beryl! You’re here at last! I’m so sorry, I didn’t recognise you for a moment. Come in, come in, I’m so pleased to see you.’
Snatching up a rather battered suitcase, Adina ushered her into the hallway where Beryl stood looking around her anxiously. The child in her arms was whimpering and Adina quickly took Beryl’s elbow and led her down to the kitchen.
‘You must be hungry and tired after your long journey,’ she said sympathetically. ‘And so must Catherine. Come with me I’ll make you both a drink and something to eat.’
As Beryl went with her, her eyes flicked from side to side in awe. It had come as a great shock when she received the money from Adina to buy an air ticket home, but this house was an even bigger shock, and she wondered where the people were who owned it. Adina had told her in her letters that she was living with a family in London, but never in her wildest dreams had Beryl expected the place to be anything like this. Whoever owned it must be very rich indeed.
Up to now she had not uttered so much as a single word, and her silence continued as Adina led her into the biggest kitchen she had ever seen.
‘Sit down and make yourself at home,’ Adina told her, wondering what had happened to the girl she had used to know. Beryl’s bleached blonde hair, which had used to be one of her most striking features, was now a dull mousy brown tied into the nape of her neck with a thin ribbon, and her eyes were empty and lacklustre.
When she placed Catherine onto a chair and slowly began to peel off the drab brown coat that she was wearing, Adina was shocked to see how much weight she had lost. She was so thin that she looked almost skeletal, and she was desperately pale, although there were the remains of a bruise all across one of her eyes that had now faded to a dirty yellowy colour, making her look slightly jaundiced.
Adina tried to sound cheerful as she bustled about refilling the kettle and fetching bread, cheese and butter from the pantry. And all the while the infant on the chair watched her from wary eyes as she clung to the sleeve of her mother’s faded dress.
In no time at all Adina had made a bowl of bread and milk for the little girl and a plateful of cheese sandwiches for her mother. She then heated a large pan of milky cocoa. ‘I had no idea how long it would take you to get here’, she said. ‘Did you fly or come by sea?’
‘We flew,’ Beryl informed her as she spooned the bread and milk into the child’s mouth. ‘It took hours and hours.’ Adina knew that London Airport had only recently been opened for civilian transport, and assumed that the long journey accounted for Beryl’s exhaustion. ‘We’ve come by bus and Underground from the airport. It wasn’t easy with a baby and a suitcase to juggle, but at least we’re here now. How are you, Adina?’
‘I’ve been better, to be honest,’ Adina pushed a mug of cocoa towards her and a beaker for the little girl. ‘But I’ll tell you all about that later. For now I just want to look at you. I can’t believe that you’re really here. I’ve missed you so much.’
And then suddenly they were in each other’s arms and the tears on their cheeks mingled as the two friends each thought of all they had been through since they had last seen each other.
Chapter Forty
After Beryl had changed her baby’s nappy and given her a warm wash and put her in her night-clothes, Adina took them up to the room she had prepared for them. There was a large double bed in there and Beryl instantly tucked the child down. The little one was asleep almost before her head had hit the pillow and as she jammed her thumb into her mouth Adina felt sorry for her. She looked so little and vulnerable.
‘I could buy a cot for Catherine, if you like,’ she whispered.
‘No!’ Beryl shot back, a little too quickly. ‘She can sleep with me. She doesn’t like to be on her own. She’s quite a nervy child.’
‘That’s fine,’ Adina assured her. ‘And now that Catherine is settled, how about we go back downstairs and you can tell me all about what’s been happening?’
Beryl glanced at her child one last time, hoping she wouldn’t wake up and be scared, before quietly following Adina from the room. Soon they were installed in the drawing room where Beryl gazed about herself in awe.
‘Blimey! This is quite some place, ain’t it?’ she whistled softly through her teeth, and just for a second Adina caught a glimpse of the light-hearted friend she remembered. ‘Where are the folks that own it?’ Beryl went on. ‘Will they be home soon?’
‘Unfortunately no, they won’t, but I’ll tell you all about that later.’ Adina poured them both a small glass of sherry from Mrs Montgomery’s crystal decanter. ‘For now I want to hear all about you.’
Beryl spread her hands in a gesture of helplessness. ‘Where do I start? It’s been one disaster after another ever since the minute I left England. Most of the GI brides sailed out to join their husbands in America on the Queen Mary in February, as you probably know. I thought I was one of the lucky ones, being allowed to fly home with Tyrone immediately after we got married. He was an officer, you see, an’ I’d kicked up such a stink that I think he had to pull a few strings. I wish to God I hadn’t bothered now. Perhaps if I’d stayed back with the majority of the other brides he would have forgotten all about me. He’d certainly have been doing me a favour. In fact, I wish I’d never set eyes on him.’
She sipped at her drink as Adina stared at her sympathetically. Beryl looked as if she’d had the very soul sucked out of her. She had never seen her before without her make-up and was finding it difficult to believe that this was the same girl who had once befriended her back in Nuneaton. Whenever she had thought of Beryl in the time they had been apart, she had always pictured her with the bright red lipstick and nail varnish that she had favoured. Beryl would never have dreamed of stepping outside the house without her ‘war paint’ on, as she had called it back then, but now she was devoid of any make-up whatsoever and she looked years older than she actually was.
‘It was a shock, when we got to the States, I don’t mind tellin’ you,’ Beryl continued. ‘My in-laws’ home was appalling, little more than a shack. It was in Texas, but in the back of beyond: nothing like the stud ranch he had conned me into believing. And what made it worse was the fact that from the second I set foot through the door, they made it clear that I wasn’t welcome there. I hoped things would impro
ve once Catherine arrived, but if anythin’ that only made things worse. They moaned every time the poor little mite so much as whimpered. An’ then Tye started to stay out at night, and when I complained, he’d thump me one.’ Her hand rose self-consciously to her eye. ‘I kept thinkin’ that it would get better, but the trouble was, Catherine’s always been a sickly baby – an’ that got on his nerves an’ all. He was forever tellin’ me to shut her up. I had to beg for every penny he gave me, and after a time I suppose I just gave up. That’s why the money you sent me came as such a godsend. I couldn’t believe me luck, though it weren’t easy to get away. I had to plan it all on the quiet an’ then slip out with Catherine in the dead o’ night so none of them would know I was goin’. If they’d found out about the money you sent they’d have taken it off me, see? An’ then I’d have been stuck there for good.’ Beryl held out her hands, to show Adina how they were still shaking. ‘But how did you manage to raise that much, Dina? You must have a very good job.’
Adina took a deep breath: it was time to relay her story now.
‘Do you remember Karl?’ she asked. When Beryl nodded, the words began to spill out of her mouth. She held nothing back until eventually the whole sorry story was told. It was such a relief to have someone to confide in, and as she came to an end, Beryl’s mouth gaped in amazement.
‘Your mam, dad an’ Dovi all dead, an’ you had a baby!’ she gasped incredulously.
Adina mopped at her eyes with a handkerchief as she nodded.
‘An’ now all this is yours?’ Beryl gazed around in amazement.
‘Only for now,’ Adina gulped. ‘I haven’t touched a penny of the money the Montgomerys left me, apart from to send you some for your ticket and to pay for the roof repair and some bills. But when I find them and get Dottie back, I’ll refund every penny, including the house. I don’t want any of it if it costs me my baby.’
‘Oh, Dina . . . An’ here’s me, feelin’ sorry for meself. Why, I reckon you’ve had a worse time of it than I have, from what you’ve just told me. What does Ariel think of all this?’
‘She never knew about the baby. No one did, only the Montgomerys,’ Adina admitted.
‘Hm, then that could make it difficult,’ Beryl said quietly. ‘It seems to me that even if you do manage to track them down, you’re goin’ to have a fight on your hands to get the baby back. It will be your word against theirs if it went to court an’ they said that you’d given her to them for this place and an allowance.’
‘But I didn’t! I wouldn’t!’ Adina denied hotly.
‘I know you wouldn’t. Calm down,’ Beryl urged. ‘But no one else does, do they? Seems to me the Montgomerys have been very crafty, the way they’ve gone about this.’
‘You don’t think I’m going to get Dottie back, do you?’
Beryl opened her mouth to lie but then clamped it shut. ‘I have to say it ain’t lookin’ likely,’ she said. ‘It seems to me they’ve stitched you up good an’ proper, especially wi’ that letter the old woman left for you. If you showed that to the police they’d laugh you out o’ the station and think you were just regrettin’ what you’d agreed.’ She had never lied to Adina before and had no intentions of starting now. ‘P’rhaps it might be better if you try to put everything behind you an’ start afresh.’
‘Could you do that if someone took Catherine off you?’ Adina ground out indignantly.
‘It wouldn’t be easy, but if I were in your position, happen I’d have to. I’m so sorry for everything that’s happened though. I can only imagine how awful it must be for you.’
A thin wail suddenly reached them from above and as Adina glanced towards the clock on the mantelpiece she was shocked to see that almost two hours had passed since Beryl had arrived. But then they had had so much to catch up on and talk about that the time had just flown by.
‘That’s Catherine,’ Beryl said as she rose from her seat and hurried towards the door. ‘I bet she’ll be hungry again.’
‘You go and fetch her down and I’ll get us all something hot to eat,’ Adina said as her friend disappeared through the door. And then she managed a weak smile. At least she wasn’t totally alone any more.
By the end of the first week, Adina felt as if Beryl and Catherine had been there with her for ever. She would go off to work each day and arrive home to find the house sparkling and a meal prepared.
‘I’ve got to do somethin’ to keep meself busy, ain’t I?’ Beryl shrugged when Adina told her that there was really no need to wait on her. ‘I shall have to think about findin’ meself a job an’ all soon. I can’t expect you to keep the pair of us.’
‘But I don’t mind really,’ Adina assured her.
Beryl shook her head. She had initially through of returning to live with her parents in Nuneaton. She knew that she would be welcome there, and that they would adore their little granddaughter, but with Adina she felt that she had a measure of independence at least. She also hated the thought of leaving her. Adina seemed so alone. And so her mind was racing for most of the time as she tried to think of some sort of job she might do. Before she could do anything, she would have to find a childminder for Catherine, of course, and it was a daunting thought. She had never left her before.
Each night after dinner the two young women would bath Catherine and then once she was settled in Beryl’s bed they would sit and chat. Already, Beryl was looking slightly better than when she had first arrived, although she seemed reluctant to leave the house, which Adina supposed was understandable. Adina would tell Beryl all about the children at the school each evening and Beryl would listen avidly. Sadly, Adina had discovered that Esther, one of her favourites, had also been orphaned and her heart ached for the child who had been placed in the same orphanage as Rebekah. Both of the little girls were struggling to come to terms with the fact that they would never see their parents again, and Adina wished that there was more that she could do for them. Every day, the Red Cross and the Salvation Army brought her horror stories of what had become of certain children’s parents, and she felt so useless.
Strangely, since Beryl’s arrival, Adina had almost abandoned her search for Dottie. She knew that her chances of ever tracing her were slight, as Beryl had pointed out, and now she was just taking one day at a time, although the longing to see her little girl never went away. It had helped, having Catherine there to coo over, and the toddler was finally accepting her. Adina had fetched the few remaining toys that the Montgomerys had left behind from Dottie’s nursery and she loved playing with them with her little house guest, who would giggle with delight at all the attention that was being showered on her.
It was one evening when they had tucked Catherine into bed and were enjoying a cup of cocoa in the kitchen that Beryl tentatively broached an idea that had been playing on her mind for a few days. ‘I’ve been thinkin’ . . . this house is yours now to do as you please with, ain’t it?’
Adina nodded over the rim of her mug. ‘Yes, it is – why?’
‘Well, the thing is, it’s far too big just for us an’ I need a job though I ain’t too happy about the thought of leavin’ Cathy with a stranger. So I thought, why don’t I do a job that would mean I didn’t have to leave the house?’
‘What did you have in mind?’ Adina asked.
‘I was thinkin’ of all them little ones where you work havin’ to go into orphanages ’cos their parents have been killed or are missin’, an’ I thought, well, how about we have a few of them here? You know, start a little home for them. I know the people who took in evacuees got paid by the Welfare, so why shouldn’t we do it?’
Adina stared off into space as she tossed the idea around in her mind. A children’s home! It was something that had never occurred to her, but the more she thought about it, the more the idea appealed to her. And what Beryl had suggested certainly made sense.
After a time she said, ‘I’ll have a chat to the Headmistress tomorrow and see what she thinks of your idea – if you’re really sure it’s so
mething you’d like to do?’
‘I am sure.’ Beryl suddenly looked quite excited and once again it struck Adina just how much her friend had changed in the time they had been apart. Beryl had grown up, but then so had she – they had both had to, and now she felt ready for a challenge.
The very next day she approached Miss Wainwright as soon as she arrived at the school. The woman was actually glad of a chance to speak to Adina because she had been concerned about her for some time. The young woman still did her job efficiently, but all the sparkle seemed to have gone out of her and she didn’t look at all well.
‘How can I help you, my dear?’ she asked, when they were both seated in her office.
‘Well . . .’ Adina took a deep breath and put the idea of her fostering the children to the woman, who listened carefully.
‘You’re rather young to be thinking of doing something quite so ambitious,’ she said doubtfully. ‘And won’t it be too much for you? I mean, you already have your own baby to care for, don’t you?’
If truth be told, Mrs Wainwright had thought it quite strange, the way the Montgomerys had left the school so quickly, leaving no forwarding address. She had always understood that Adina had lodged with them and Fliss had cared for the child once Adina had come back to work.
For a moment Adina was lost for words. What could she say? If she told the woman the truth, she would never take her word against the Montgomerys’, so instead she said quietly, ‘I lost the baby.’ She wasn’t really lying the way she saw it. She had lost Dottie.
Mrs Wainwright was shocked, but felt that this would explain so much. The poor girl. No wonder she had looked so ill! But she didn’t ask any questions. It was obvious that Adina was struggling with her loss and she made a mental note to speak to the other members of staff to ensure that they never mentioned the baby again. Not that Adina had ever been very forthcoming about her private life. She had always been very polite, but kept herself very much to herself. Mrs Wainwright didn’t even know what had happened to Adina’s husband – if there had ever been one. He was no doubt one of the poor souls who had perished in the war. Adina certainly didn’t seem the sort of girl to have a child out of wedlock.
A Band of Steel Page 33
