The Worst of Me

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The Worst of Me Page 20

by Lisa J. Hobman


  “Come on, let’s get out of here before I end up devouring you and sod the consequences.”

  She took a moment to gather herself and adjusted her shirt to cover the vest top underneath where her nipples gave away her arousal.

  Leaning down, he placed a kiss on her cheek. “Don’t worry, you affect me in exactly the same way.”

  ♫♫♫

  Catriona

  Cat was grateful for the fact that her dad had enlisted the help of a young lad, just turned eighteen, from the village to help out in the pub. She knew he had done this to give her more time with Nick even though he had insisted it was for his own benefit.

  She drove herself and Nick back up to Rockhill Cottage and a familiar shiver of excited anticipation travelled up her spine.

  Once they were inside the house, Nick stacked wood in the stove and set it alight, casting a cosy orange glow around the small room. The cottage was tiny but charming and it had become her little haven since Nick arrived. Such a lovely place with some very special memories she would treasure.

  She removed her coat and sat on the couch whilst Nick went to the kitchen to collect a bottle of wine and some glasses. When he returned he had a little gold bag between his teeth.

  He put the wine glasses and bottle down on the coffee table. “I have something for you.”

  She sat up straight. “You do? What is it?”

  He sat beside her and handed her the gold bag. “A gift. I saw it in the shop just along from the book shop and immediately thought of you.”

  She clung to the bag and gazed at him. Could he possibly get any sweeter?

  He gestured to her hand. “Aren’t you going to open it?”

  She glanced down, and with shaking fingers opened the bag and pulled out a small box. She removed the lid and gasped. Her hand came to her mouth and her eyes welled with salt water as she was greeted with the most beautiful pair of silver leaf-shaped earrings.

  He cleared his throat nervously. “I know you said leaves remind you of your childhood ... of your mum especially, and I saw them and I just knew ... I knew you had to have them.”

  Memories of her mother sprang to her mind. Of how they jumped through the neighbour’s pile of leaves on the walk to school. How they would throw them up in the air so it rained hues of russet, gold and brown.

  No man had ever listened to her so intently. Taken note of the things she held dear. Been so thoughtful. Not until this long-haired, handsome, kind-hearted man appeared in the centre of her little world. If she had any doubts about her feelings before, this was all the clarification she needed. She was falling, tumbling, head over heels, and nothing could stop it now regardless of how fast it was happening.

  She was completely and utterly done for.

  She turned and lunged for him, wrapping her arms tightly around his neck as tears spilled and trailed down her cheeks.

  “I take it you like them?” he whispered into her ear.

  “I love them, Nick. I just love them.”

  “Well, now you have something to remember your mum and me by.”

  When she pulled away to look at him again his eyes were filled with something unreadable, but definitely not happiness.

  “What’s wrong, Nick?”

  He cupped her face and wiped her tears as they fell. “I think ... I think I’m going to have to leave soon.”

  They were not the words she wanted to hear but she knew he spoke the truth.

  “I know. Has something happened?”

  “Den left me a voicemail this morning. The European tour has been rescheduled. They want me to be back for mid to late March for some rehearsals with a view to starting the tour at the beginning of April.”

  She climbed into his lap and ran her fingers through his hair. “Well, I suppose that means we should make the most of whatever time we have left, eh?”

  He smoothed his hands up her arms and pulled her down so their lips connected, and she kissed him with all the pent up emotion stored inside her, hoping to express in her actions all the things it was probably much too soon to say out loud. And the way he returned that passion told her there was a chance he felt it too.

  Chapter Twenty Eight

  Catriona

  Time was passing much too quickly, and the closer it got to the music night at the pub the closer it got to the time Nick would be forced to leave Gairloch—and her—behind. She had been racking her brain for days trying to come up with something special she could do for him that would let him know how she felt without her having to use the actual words. The words ‘I love you’ seemed inappropriate considering they had only known each other for a period of weeks. But she had heard it said that “when you know ... you just know” and deep down she knew.

  The earrings he had bought her were such a wonderful surprise. So very touching, and she berated herself for ever doubting the type of person he was. It all went to prove you can’t judge a book by its cover. And what an amazing opportunity she would have missed out on if she had continued to believe all the crap she had read about him.

  This relationship felt so different to the one she’d had with Camden. She had learned more about Nick in the past month or so than she had about her former boyfriend in all the years she had known him. Looking back now she realised that things with Camden had possibly been a little staid and maybe that spoke volumes. When she was with him she had never experienced the utterly overpowering lust and sexual desire that burned within her for Nick. But there was so much more to it than just sex. She wondered if he felt the same connection.

  Never before had she imagined being so at ease with someone that she would sit, naked and unabashed, eating crisp sandwiches on a rug with a member of the opposite sex—who was also naked—whilst talking about her favourite holiday destinations and places she would love to visit when she won the lottery. Looking back, that particular situation was hilarious but she vowed never to eat crisps when naked again. The crumbs get everywhere.

  Their walks with JD along the beach at sunset were so romantic. Watching the sun disappear below the sea and sharing a kiss as the light faded. It was like some movie she was watching, not something that was happening to her. Another memory came back of browsing books in the village book shop and trying not to laugh hysterically when Nick read aloud from romance novels in his best attempt at a Scottish accent. He could make the most sensual, erotic stories sound like an episode of Rab C. Nesbitt. There were so many things she would keep in her heart and mind when he had gone.

  When he had gone.

  Gone is such a sad word with such negative connotations, and Cat wondered how the hell she would be able to carry on with life as normal when he was no longer in it. There was no point in trying to keep things going. And she doubted if he would want to once he got back into the swing of things with the band. Perhaps the memory of her would fade into insignificance.

  For her though, there would never be anything insignificant about Nick Dacre.

  ♫♫♫

  Nick

  Den had increased the number of times a day he was calling and Chris had taken to texting him to give advance warning of the calls. Thank goodness for Chris. Sometimes he accepted the calls and other times the thought of leaving Gairloch hurt too much and he couldn’t even bear the thought of talking about it.

  He was sitting on the beach mid-morning, waiting for Cat to finish her breakfast shift at the pub when an idea sprang to his mind. A way of keeping ties to the place. It would take some serious thought and planning but it could work.

  The only thing was whether or not Cat would want to see him again after he had gone. He had to talk to her. It wouldn’t be an easy conversation but it was one they needed to have. He had bought French bread, cheese and crisps and was planning on taking her for a picnic but it was too cold for that so he had decided he would light the stove and they could have a repeat of their indoor rug picnic. Although this time he would keep his boxers on if crisps were to be involved. In fact, he would be keeping a
ll of his clothes on. He couldn’t get distracted by her smell, her curves, her luscious breasts, her smile ... okay so he could easily get distracted by those things even when she wasn’t around but he would try to remain fully clothed ... at least until after they had talked.

  As he was having his internal dialogue he looked to his right and watched Cat as she approached him along the sand. Something inside him seemed to relax whenever she was near, and considering the reasons for his presence in Gairloch he wondered how he would cope when he left.

  He stood as she got closer, and when she was only a couple of feet away he lunged forward and scooped her into his arms, swinging her around and kissing her passionately.

  “Jeez, I’ve missed you, Cat,” he told her in between kisses.

  She giggled as her hair flew around her and her feet dangled beneath her. “But you only saw me this morning.”

  “Yes, and that was much too long ago.” He placed her down on the sand and cupped her face in his palms. “I think we need to talk.”

  She closed her eyes briefly and inhaled. “Must we spoil things, Nick?”

  He sighed and nodded. “I think there are things that need to be discussed.” He took her hand and they began to walk toward Rockhill Cottage.

  Once they were inside the house and Nick had lit a fire, they brought their food through to the living room and arranged it on the coffee table.

  As she munched on a piece of bread he decided there was no time like the present. “I just want you to know that ... these past few weeks have been ... so good.”

  She swallowed and held up her hand. “Look, can I just stop you before you launch into a great speech about how wonderful I am and about how much you’ll miss me?”

  He frowned. “But—”

  “Nick, please. We’ve had fun. And yes, it’s been very special. While it lasted. But things like this aren’t supposed to be long term. I understand that this is going to end. I don’t want you to think that just because you took my virginity you have some kind of obligation to promise me a long distance relationship or anything like that. And I wouldn’t want that kind of hassle anyway. I’m an adult and I know those things don’t work. So ... can we just leave it at that and enjoy the last bit of time we have together without feeling sad or awkward. Is that okay?”

  He clamped his mouth shut, dumbfounded. What the hell could he say now? She had obviously come to terms with things a hell of a lot easier than he had. Bang went the idea of getting her to fly out to meet him; he was going to offer to pay. Thud went the plan to take her off to Canada, her dream destination holiday he was planning on surprising her with. It all came crashing down around him along with any hopes of a future with this amazing woman and that caused a lump of regret to tighten his throat. Regret that this was ending and there was nothing he could do about it.

  After all you can’t have a relationship of any kind with someone who is unwilling.

  So instead of fighting for her, instead of telling her how he really felt, that she was the one person who had made him feel, the one person he couldn’t wait to see every single day, that the thought of not seeing her for months at a time ... or even worse ever again broke him in two. Instead of demanding that she stop talking crap and telling her that they could make it work, they could be the ones who succeeded, he smiled, nodded and took a large drink of his wine.

  Chapter Twenty Nine

  Nick

  The pub was buzzing with anticipation and a hum of excited chatter. The parents of each of the young band members had come along to support them, and thanks to Cat and Tam sticking up posters throughout the village and the adjacent one, there were many more people sitting in the audience too. The place was now standing room only and Nick’s nerves jangled, causing him to reminisce about his first gig at a bar in Leeds. His mum had been there, of course, and his sister who was too young to drink but who’d been allowed in so long as she stayed out of sight. The night had gone really well and there had been a talent scout in the audience who turned out to be their manager, Den.

  Back firmly in the present, the first act of the pub’s music night was a guy called Will who Nick had met officially after he’d played the accordion in the pub one lunch time for his friend’s birthday. He played a few traditional ceilidh songs that had the whole place singing along, stamping their feet and clapping. The atmosphere was electric and Nick’s face ached from his permanent grin. He wondered if maybe he should consider a career in event organisation instead of performing ...

  Another couple of local musicians performed on the fiddle and pipe, and again the place was filled with cheers and whistles to the bouncy tune of “Willy Stewart”. But as he glanced around the room Nick realised Cat was nowhere to be seen. Lorna was in amongst the crowd and he squeezed through the throngs to get to her.

  He shouted above the volume of the music. “Hey, Lorna. Have you seen Cat anywhere?”

  Lorna continued to clap along with the music and gestured no. “Nope, sorry. Why, are you needing her?”

  Nick shook his head and tried again to speak over the music. “Not really. I was just a little concerned.”

  Lorna smiled and rolled her eyes at him. “She’s a big girl, Nick. And I think you’ve enough on your plate tonight looking at this lot. Don’t worry your head. She’ll be fine.”

  Filled with concern and dissatisfied with Lorna’s response he made his way back through the crowds to the bar where Cat’s dad was leaning. “Tam, where’s Catriona? I haven’t seen her for a while.”

  Tam glanced shiftily over his shoulder and then back to Nick. “Oh, don’t worry yoursel’, lad. She’ll be back. I expect she’s gone for some fresh air.”

  Nick began to walk around to the back of the bar. “I should go check on her.”

  Tam held up his hand. “No, no she’ll be fine, Nick. You need to be here ... you know ... for the show and such.”

  Nick frowned and wondered why Tam was so insistent but he reluctantly acquiesced and returned his attention to the makeshift stage. He glanced down at the list he had scribbled on the back of his hand and realised it was time for the compère to announce the next act.

  Once Tam was on the stage and the applause had died down, he addressed the crowd. “So is everyone having fun?” The audience whooped and cheered. “Right, well, we’ve a wee change to the playbill this evening.” A rumble travelled around the room and Nick glanced at his hand again. It was supposed to be a young lad from the high school on his trumpet. No one had informed him otherwise. Panic washed over him.

  Don’t go wrong now. Please don’t go wrong now.

  Tam carried on. “Don’t worry, folks, we just decided to squeeze in a small, additional one. Drew McDrummond and his trumpet will be up in a wee while but ... well I’m proud to say that someone very dear to my heart has decided to be incredibly brave tonight. As many of you know, my Catriona is an extremely talented musician but playing in public is something she avoids at all costs. Well, that was until now. She decided that someone here means so much to her that she’d step out of her comfort zone and into the spotlight. So, I’m over the moon to announce our next act ... my very own Catriona McCreadie.” Tam’s eyes filled with tears as he banged his hands together, pride beaming all over his face as a terrified-looking Cat walked out onto the stage.

  Nick’s heart damn near missed a beat and his mouth fell open. She looked stunning. She wore a black v-neck top, very simple and understated, with black jeans and boots. Her long auburn waves were scooped over one shoulder and she wore the silver leaf earrings Nick had bought for her from the little gift shop in the village.

  “I’d close that mouth of yours if I were you. Someone’s liable to pour a whiskey in it.” Nick turned to meet the gleaming gaze of Lorna. The excitement in her eyes was unmistakable.

  Nick shook his head. “You knew about this, didn’t you?”

  She laughed. “Pfft. Of course I knew. She’s my best friend, you numpty.”

  Nick turned his attention back to
the stage and waited with baited breath for Catriona to begin.

  She cleared her throat and sat on the stool in the centre of the stage. “Evening, folks.” The whole room replied in unison and she giggled. He so loved that sound. The one spotlight shining on her created a kind of halo effect and cleverly hid the fact that her cheeks were no doubt on fire. “I want to dedicate this song to my good friend, Randall.” She smirked and he chuckled to himself. “He begged me to perform at this gig a while ago and I refused point blank but ... well, let’s say he was rather persuasive, and unbeknownst to him I’ve had this planned for about a week now. Anyway ... I want to sing a song that was inspired by our own Rabbie Burns.” A cheer erupted. “The first time I heard it performed it was done by Eddie Reader and it was beautiful. I just hope I can do it justice.” Nick watched in awe as she reached down and picked up her guitar, balancing it on her lap. She adjusted the microphone a little. “This is called ‘Wild Mountainside’.”

  She began to strum the opening chords and Nick was mesmerised. It was as if the rest of the crowd had disappeared and she was performing just for him. She didn’t search him out; instead she smiled to herself and closed her eyes as she began to sing.

  Her sweet voice rang out across the room and grabbed him firmly by the heart. The lyrics were pure poetry and she brought them to life with the passion she expressed. Nick swallowed down a knot of emotion but kept his eyes firmly fixed on her. She was incredible and he had a hard time accepting that she kept this talent to herself. Finally hearing her sing and play properly felt like all his Christmases had come at once.

  When it came to the instrumental break, Will, the accordionist, joined her at the back of the stage and accompanied her as swayed to the music. Shivers travelled the full length of Nick’s spine and his eyes began to sting. The effect the song had on him was unexpected, however, it was Catriona singing it and he knew that had a lot to do with his reaction. But why?

 

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