She warned me that maybe I should try a beginner class, but I told her I could handle anything they had to offer. I also said my only free time would be Wednesday at five o’clock since I knew Tenley’s class was the only one there at that time.
Maybe I should’ve taken her warnings more seriously.
I walked into class carrying everything I was told to bring—water bottle, yoga mat, and a towel. Glancing around the room, I noticed there was only one guy in the class… me. It seemed everyone else took notice of it too.
Tenley’s eyes went wide as soon as she saw me. She excused herself from where she was talking to make her way over to where I was standing. “What are you doing here?” Her face had a look of confusion along with a hint of annoyance.
“I’m here for my yoga lesson.”
“Preston, this class isn’t for you.”
“My name on the roster says it is.”
“Do you know what you signed up for?”
“Yes, something or another yoga. I don’t remember the name, but how hard can it be?”
The first lesson of the day was to never say how hard can it be. The second was to never ever say those words to Tenley again. It will bite you in the ass.
I’d known her forever, and there was only one other time I saw the look she was now wearing on her face. It was when her college boyfriend walked out of her roommate's bedroom with sex hair and her roommate attached to his lips. Tenley had taken the day off work to prepare a surprise meal for their six-month anniversary. The only reason I was present for the whole encounter was for the simple reason that I was her transportation. Tenley needed a ride to the grocery store.
I was fully prepared to drop the five bags of food I held and take care of him in a fist to face way, but Tenley put her arm out in front of me to block me.
She didn’t cry. She didn’t even look sad. What she did look like was fire was about to explode from her head and possibly her mouth. Still, Tenley didn’t say a word to either of them. With poise, she opened the container holding the coconut cream pie she’d bought and dumped it on the asshole’s head. After that, she walked into her bedroom and casually tossed all his belongings, one by one, out the door.
Lucky for me, there was no pie around. I wasn’t a fan of coconut in pie. Unlucky for me…
Tenley walked away from me to the front of the room. I was fully prepared for the yoga mat she picked up to become projectile, but it didn’t. She unrolled it and laid it on the floor, where she proceeded to do a few stretches. She glanced my way with a look that spoke a thousand words. Seven words to be exact. I’ll show you how hard it can be.
Her elbows lowered to the floor, then she raised her legs in the air in some kind of handstand. Then with complete concentration, she almost folded her body in half, the wrong way. Her feet practically touching her head.
I gulped. Fifty percent of me was impressed. The other fifty percent was freaking out because what the hell did I get myself into?
She slowly corrected herself to a standing position. As she breezed by me, she whispered, “Don’t worry, we won’t be doing Scorpions today.” She continued walking by with a confident sway to her hips, heading directly to the thermostat where she addressed the entire class. “Apparently, it has come to my attention that this class might be easy. How about we make it a challenge and set the temperature for ninety-three today.”
The room cheered—the silent kind. Everyone happily rushed to set up their respective mats.
I, on the other hand, wiggled my finger in my ear. There was no way I heard her right. Didn’t they normally crank the air conditioner down in these classes? Or, at least, not try to compete with the ridiculously hot weather outside. I mean, I did run outside. But I did it before the sun was fully up or when the sun went down. Even so, if it was excessively hot, I ran on the treadmill at the gym. Because air conditioning.
“New guy,” Tenley called. “I saved you a spot right up front.”
I’m screwed.
“I think I found a spot right here. Thanks.” It was in the back of the room where I could more observe than fully have to participate. And conveniently close to the exit.
“That won’t do. I want to make sure I’m challenging you enough.”
I’m totally screwed.
“And, you know, so I can watch your alignment.”
Fuck me. I was one hundred percent screwed.
I took my walk of shame to the front of the room with my balls manning up for me. The temperature rose quickly. Already, I could feel a bead of sweat dripping down the back of my neck and under my shirt. Tenley, being a gracious host, helped me set up my mat. “Next time, wear gym shorts and a tank top. The temperature will probably reach one hundred and five with all the bodies moving. Let’s begin, shall we?”
Tenley’s voice was soft and soothing as she spoke the directions for the first few moves. It wasn’t so bad. A deep breath here. A half-moon pose there. Look like a tree. Breathe in. Bend again. Breathe out. Every now and then, Tenley would fix the way I was positioned, but she did it in a way where it didn’t make me feel insecure.
All in all, I thought I was doing fine until we moved to one-legged poses about thirty minutes into class. Muscles I had never felt were getting used in different ways. My entire body was sweating profusely as I attempted everything Tenley directed us to do. It was when we were attempting toe stands that sweat ran in my eyes and my vision blurred. Only it wasn’t just blurred, it was fading. I was seeing these tiny pixel-like images dancing across my eyes before everything went black.
My ears closed, blocking the sound as I hit the ground with a smack.
I didn’t know how long I was out. The only thing I registered was Tenley’s voice as I started to come to. “Wake up. Please, Preston. Wake up.”
Something cool was touching my forehead. A wet cloth and Tenley’s fingers were on my cheeks.
“Maybe he needs mouth to mouth,” someone said in the background.
“Should we call an ambulance?” another voice asked.
I opened my eyes to Tenley holding a cold cloth. She smiled when our eyes connected. “You’re awake.”
“It seems so.”
“Are you okay?” she asked as she dabbed my head with the cloth again.
“I’m not sure. I think some mouth to mouth might help me feel better.”
“You’re a jerk.” The towel she was holding hit me in the chest.
I sat up, still feeling out of sorts and less than manly. Never in my life have I passed out. “You made me pass out, so I think we’re even.”
“I know. I’m so sorry, Preston.”
“How’d I do otherwise?”
She reached behind her and handed me a bottle of water. “Not bad for a first timer. But you were my first blackout.”
I held up my hand for a high five, which she quickly returned. “Awesome.”
Once everyone knew I was fine, they went home. Tenley clocked out, then drove me home in my car since she walked to work.
She stayed at my apartment longer than she needed to, but I wasn’t going to complain. While I took a cool shower, she ran to her place to take one too. Forty-five minutes later, she returned with dinner—two sandwiches.
“This is really good.” I moaned as I bit into the hot turkey Cuban sub.
“You should try this.” She held out her sandwich to me. It was amazingly good for not having meat. The smoked mozzarella, tomato, and spinach melted together on my tongue.
“So good,” I repeated with a full mouth.
“Right?”
“Where did you get this?” It was hands down the best bread I ever tasted.
“A few blocks away at some sandwich joint called Butter My Bread.”
“Is it new?”
“I don’t think so.”
“How have we never seen it before?”
“Because you only go to one deli at the grocery store. And every time I ask you to try someplace new, you whine.”
What c
ould I say, I was a creature of habit when it came to food. When I found something I liked, I stuck with it. “I don’t whine.”
Her eyebrow rose as she bit into her sandwich.
“Well, I’ll try any place you want from now on as long as the food is this good.”
She put her food down. “Preston, I’m really sorry about class.”
“Stop apologizing. You didn’t do anything. I’m the one who shouldn’t have insinuated what you do is easy. You’re good, Tenley.”
She looked away from me. For the first time, my best friend was shying away from me, and it wouldn’t do. I slid off my chair to kneel in front of her. Placing my finger under her chin, I turned her head to face me. “I mean it, Ten. Your body… the way you make it move is crazy. I didn’t know you could do anything like that.”
“It’s not like I do it in front of you.”
I meant what I said, but those words didn’t even come close to how impressed I was with her abilities. I wanted her to know I was telling the truth. I kept my eyes focused on hers. “You’re more than amazing.”
She swallowed.
I swallowed too. Then I licked my lips because suddenly they were dry.
She followed by wetting hers.
I waited for the feeling of wanting to kiss her to go away. It didn’t. But I told her I’d wait for her to tell me she was comfortable.
It never came. Tenley slid back in her chair, farther away from me. “Thank you.”
I stood to give her the space she wanted back, then planted myself back in the chair, muttering idiot to myself as I reached for my food trying to cover my fuckup.
Was I pushing this? And why did I want to push this faster?
“Soon,” Tenley said.
I looked at her, not sure if I missed a piece of the conversation.
“I just. I mean. You know. Soon.” Her words were stuttered and broken, but probably the best words I’d heard in months.
“Soon,” I repeated.
She smiled, and I wanted to say I couldn’t wait for soon.
I was beyond screwed.
8
Tenley
One move doesn’t fit all.
THE ART OF LEARNING and perfecting Kama Sutra. I read the DVD case Preston handed me for the hundredth time.
“I’m not watching this.” I also repeated those words for the ninety-ninth time, but this time, I said it out loud.
“Come on. It’s an instructional. I watched a sample of it before I bought it, and it’s good, clean, educational fun. Like cartoon drawings.” He grabbed the box and pointed out the images on the back. “See.”
“I’m not watching a sex self-help video with you.” A fake girlfriend has to draw the line somewhere. And porn was my line. Sure, I indulged in a good NC-17 movie or even a few gifs now and then, but fake orgasms and bad homemade movies weren’t my thing.
“Why?”
It wasn’t like sitting down and watching some superhero movies with you like I have since college because Channel number nine wouldn’t. “It’s weird. And because we share a bedroom wall. I don’t need to a visual to go with the sounds I hear.”
“We’ve watched shows and movies with sex and naked bodies before. Wait? You mean you’ve heard everything for the past...”
“Three years.” I heard it all. Every moan. Every squeak of a bed spring. Everything.
“Shit.”
That about summed it up. “I believe it was more ooh, yes, yes, yes. But you may have said shit a time or two.”
Preston stared at me, blinking for a beat before shaking his head. “How come I never heard you? Never mind, don’t answer that.”
There was one guy. One very forgettable guy. So it’d been a long time. A real long time. Like a long time ago in a galaxy far away, long time. I didn’t say it, though. “The minute any of my dates saw you, let’s just say they kept a healthy distance.”
The truth was, I stopped bringing my dates home when my nosy neighbor had a strange sixth sense when it came to knowing when Tenley was about to get some. Preston would show up at my door needing something—sugar, salt, paper towels. Minutes after meeting him, my date would start asking if I was sleeping with my neighbor. I decided it wasn’t worth the headache of explaining it and gave up on men who couldn’t handle me having a male best friend. Which translated to all men.
He smiled proudly. “I did like to give them a little talking-to when you were in the bathroom.”
“What? Why?”
“I had to make sure they were worthy of my girl.”
His girl. He didn’t know how much those two words affected me.
I played it off just as I always did, though. “Well, thanks for ensuring I had the longest dry spell, Griffin.”
“You’re welcome.” And he was serious. He thought he was doing me a favor by protecting me from the big, bad men of Naples, Florida, when he was actually preventing me from moving on from crushing on him.
“I’m still not watching the movie.” I gave my best Vulcan hand salute. “It feels like a Star Trek night. Doesn’t it?”
“That’s only because you’re hot for Spock. And you owe me, Ten.”
“And you’re hot for the green chick in the matching bra and panties. What do you mean I owe you?”
“For making me pass out. Green chick is hot.” He studied me for a minute. “You know you look like her. I mean if your body was tinted green and you had red hair.”
Did he just call me hot? No, he called the actress hot and said I lacked her hair and skin pigmentation. And hey. “Add this to your list of wrongs. Don’t say another girl is hot when you are trying to get in someone’s pants.”
Preston wiggled his eyebrows.
“I mean. Not my pants. You know what I mean.” Way to go, Tenley.
“Duly noted. Now, let’s pop this in the Blu-ray and get to learning.”
No, no, and more no. “You told me we were even about the whole passing out thing, so I’m not watching it. Period. Final. End of story.”
Then my best friend played unfairly. His lips dropped while his eyebrows rose. Those blue eyes of his grew twice their normal size. Preston had mastered his version of puppy dog eyes, and I dared any woman to try to say no to him when his bottom lip started to quiver.
Damn you, Griffin.
“Fine.”
As quickly as he put on the pity face, he transformed it to his excited face. “I even brought snacks.”
“Don’t try to soften this with food.” But he knew he had me. Snacks were my weakness. “What did you bring?”
“Fingering foods.” He opened the grocery bag he placed on the table while I waited for him to realize what he said. It was possible I heard him wrong.
“You mean finger foods.”
“No, I mean fingering foods. Look it up.”
There was no way I was entering the word fingering on my browser. Who knew what kind of images would pop up. Probably some of the ones I’m about to see in cartoon version on this educational movie.
“No thanks.”
“It’s on Pinterest.”
I couldn't hold back my laughter. “You’ve been on Pinterest?”
“Hey, don’t knock it. It’s been useful every time I’ve been on there.” Preston took out two plates and divided everything between us. He stuck the DVD under his arm while he carried the plates to the living room, and I followed him with two bottles of water.
Unexcited for the first time about movie night, I plopped down on the couch. Then I realized it was only Wednesday. “Preston, you know it’s only Wednesday, right?”
“Yes.”
“I was just checking.”
“Don’t worry. We’re still having movie night tomorrow. Star Trek just for you for watching this with me.”
“I still don’t get why you want me to watch this with you.”
He tossed me the case. “Read the front.”
“Bringing couples closer one move at a time.” Oh, my God. “We aren’t a couple.”
Not in the real sense.
“For the next three weeks, we are.”
“Preston.”
He sat next to me. “Try for me, Tenley. Can you do that? Help me Obi-wan Tenley, you’re my only hope.”
Damn him and his puppy eyes, and now I wanted to watch Star Wars. “Star Wars tomorrow. The original.”
He got down on one knee in front of me. “Does this mean you’ll be my girlfriend?”
I rolled my eyes because if I didn’t, I might have swooned. The kind where I would throw my arms around Preston and say of course I’ll be your girlfriend. “Fine. But I want extra butter popcorn, Milk Duds and chocolate-covered raisins tomorrow. And no complaining when I mix them together.”
“Deal.” He jumped on the couch next to me, then pressed play on the remote.
Here we go.
The beginning was very much audiobook brought to video. The images they showed reminded me of Tarot cards. It gave the history of Kama Sutra depicted in these puppet-like cartoons. It didn't bore me, though.
It talked about love, the union of two people, and the connection between them. All of which were important. I looked over at Preston. He was leaning forward with his elbows on his knees and his chin rested on his hands. He was rotating between watching intently and eating his snacks. I could see his mind absorbing it all. I still didn’t quite understand why he was going to such lengths because of one person’s opinion. Did she really make him doubt himself that much?
By the way he was taking this seriously, I guess she did. I’d been hesitant about us moving along with this plan of his, but maybe I was less worried now. Preston shouldn’t doubt himself. And if he needed someone to erase those uncertainties, who better than his best friend. If he was going to take this seriously, then I guess I should too.
The DVD went on to discuss the mood. How you need to draw your lover away from the everyday concerns of our life.
“Surprise them with a special gift of wine, chocolate, or even lingerie,” the narrator said.
All the Right Moves Page 5
