by May Dawson
“We should still pretend to hate each other,” he murmured. “Convince him that the spell worked. It might be easier for you to get him alone if he thinks we’re divided.”
I paused, raising my eyebrows at him. “Pretend to hate you?”
“Impossible princess,” he scoffed.
He wrapped his arms tight around me, kissing me hard, finally. And the room shifted around us as the magic ran out, and we were back in the demon’s case. I kissed him long and hard, one last time. One time to last me through the rest of our battle here.
“We’ve got to survive,” I told him softly. “I don’t want to die without having slept with an angel.”
Jacob shook his head. “You are absolutely ridiculous.”
The door opened. The two of us shifted apart slightly, as if we would be caught.
It wasn’t Nimshi.
Samael stood in the doorway, smiling at us.
“A little angel and a little girl,” he said. “My two very favorite meats.”
25
Samael crouched in front of me, his eyes on me steady and mocking. He was a hulking brute of a man. His shirt-sleeves were rolled back to expose reddish-brown tattoos.
“Do you know who I am?” he asked me.
I stared back at him without answering. I didn’t want to give away anything that might clue him into who I was. He had startlingly light eyes, eyes that didn’t seem to fit his current face.
I remembered those eyes, lit with laughter, in the garden. And I remembered those eyes, cold and filled with intent, as he came towards me with the stone in his hand. We had been arguing, and my chest was heaving with the stress of the fight, but I had watched him come near me innocently. In the time before man first killed woman, it had never occurred to me that he would hurt me.
“I used to be human like you too,” he said. “But I became something more. Something between human and god…for now.”
I stared back at him. Great, another chatty demon.
“Something between human and worm,” Jacob muttered.
Those dangerous light eyes swiveled to regard Jacob. I turned, too, because Jacob had been stoic while we were in the case. His usual wise-ass self was under lock and key, but he also had that quiet strength that allowed him to endure. Jacob’s eyes were on the stone floor in front of him, and I didn’t expect him to say another word.
Samael’s eyes returned to me, and he stretched out a hand towards my face. “You are a beautiful girl, aren’t you?”
“She hasn’t brushed her teeth in three days,” Jacob said. “You were locked up down there a long time, huh?”
Samael’s eyes blazed. “We aren’t locked up.”
“Right, you can leave any time,” Jacob nodded, his eyes still fixed on the floor. “It’s your choice to stay there. You’re not being punished by god and the angels. You’re totally in control. That’s why like three of you make it out every year.”
“There’ll soon be many more of us, Nephilim,” Samael said.
“Then there’ll soon be demon blood running in the streets.” Jacob shook his head. “Shame. Demon blood always stinks like Sulphur and sour milk—it’s the damndest thing.”
Samael’s eyes were on mine, and there was a triumphant smirk to his lips. “You’re trying to distract me from the girl. You don’t want me to hurt her.”
Jacob shrugged. “As a Hunter, I have to be gallant. It’s in the job description.”
“A Hunter? The Hunters would never accept a Nephilim like you.”
“It’s a whole new world, demon,” Jacob said. “Did you know Belial, by any chance? I don’t know how small-town Hell is… but I imagine you probably met.”
The demon watched him with curious, angry eyes.
“Funny how much street cred you earn with Hunters,” Jacob went on, “When you’ve wet your sword with the stinking blood of a demon. Belial told me his name before he died. He just wanted the pain to end.”
“And so will you,” Samael promised. He reached out to take Jacob’s jaw in his hand, forcing Jacob to face him. “I understand what you’re doing. That you want to keep my hands off the girl. But by the time I turn to her, you’ll be grateful for the respite.”
“You’re all so chatty,” Jacob said. “Belial had a lot to say, too.”
Samael’s fingers tightened on Jacob’s jaw. I could see his thick fingers sinking into Jacob’s skin, which flushed white. Samael’s fingers sunk even further, and there was a faint crack. Jacob groaned, low in the back of his throat.
“The dark lord’s going to take your body,” Samael promised Jacob. “And the pain you know will only grow worse from here.”
Samael’s grip tightened even further. Jacob’s eyes widened, almost bulging now.
“Let go of him,” I said, my voice low and rough. “You’re going to kill him.”
Not that I would have expected that to persuade the demons, but they had a use for his body, and they couldn’t use him as a vessel if he died before he broke.
Samael grinned. “I killed this one once before. When he was just a boy.”
Jacob’s eyes narrowed.
“Oh yes, he’s still here,” Samael said. “His body, more or less. But he was on the verge of welcoming the demon. We crushed the man he would have been out of him.”
I knew that I had lost the chance to know the other Jacob. The boy who had been buried under the rocks in the slipscape was gone, gone in every dimension, whether he died or lived through his torture.
My creeping fingers found Jacob’s and knit around his trembling fingers. I didn’t dare bring Samael’s attention back to me, even though he was ranting for my benefit, because if Samael realized who I was, all was lost. But I willed Jacob to know that I was glad he had lived. It didn’t matter if he had to change to survive. The Jacob who was here was good and deserving, no matter how different he might have been in another world where no demon ever dragged him into the case.
Samael released Jacob’s jaw, and I heard a second faint crack at the release. Samael patted his cheek.
“Let’s get you strung up,” Samael said. “I would hate for you to crack your head when you pass out.”
I gritted my teeth at the sound of the winch rolling, the chain jerking and tightening until Jacob was hauled to the tips of his toes, his arms spread wide above his head. His chest fluttered in terror despite himself.
“Let us review,” Samael said.
He didn’t do Nimshi’s showy little wave. But suddenly the curly-headed boy Jacob had been was strung up on the opposite wall, just the way that grown Jacob was now. His head hung forward, his body inert, as if he had passed out. A man crossed towards him, carrying a bucket of water, which he pulled back to dump over his head.
“And then we can begin the re-enactment.”
No matter how much Jacob tried to jerk away, Samael had his wrist pinioned to the wall. Blood trickled from the other wrist, a slow dark thread sliding down his arm and soaking his white t-shirt.
“The devil’s nails,” Samael said. “You humans borrowed these from us, did you know that? You humans love to torture almost as much as we do. The Dark Ages. The Middle Ages. The Inquisition. You’ve always made me so proud.”
“You’re going to kill him,” I said. For the first time, I wondered where the hell Nimshi was, wishing he was there. I wasn’t sure he had any power to stop Samael, but maybe he could talk him out of what he was doing.
“Actually, he’s going to kill himself.” Samael stepped back. Jacob was breathing hard, his teeth biting down so hard on his lower lip that it was beginning to bleed too, biting back a scream. “With his rage and his revenge. You see, he’ll bleed slow as long as he stays slow. The nails are sealing his wound.”
Samael reached up and unshackled one wrist. Jacob hung from one arm for a second, his legs going out from underneath him, and then he scraped himself back up the wall to his feet. Samael released the other arm and backed away. The shackles slammed against the tile wall with a clatt
er.
“Here’s your chance, boy,” Samael said. “Come and get me.”
Jacob pressed his shoulder blades against the wall, still catching his breath, eying Samael warily. He was unsteady on his feet. Samael was not only much bigger than he was, but he hadn’t spent the past few days being starved, beaten and bloodied.
“Don’t,” I begged him. “You’re giving him what he wants.”
“But he’ll get it anyway,” he told me. He brushed his fingers against mine, just for a second, using his new freedom to touch me. “Might as well dance with the demon.”
Jacob closed with Samael, even threw a few successful punches, only to have Samael slam his head into the tile wall. I knew that Jacob would never stop fighting until he died. The two of them were slipping in his blood already.
Samael slammed Jacob into the ground. Jacob rolled into a protective ball as Samael closed on him, kicking him again and again.
I had been afraid to burn this place down with us in it, but I was more afraid to watch Jacob being beaten to death, to be here alone because I hadn’t saved him.
I tried to call the flames to mind, remembering the way they had always come in my nightmares. Ryker had tried to teach me that the flames came when I called them. But I hadn’t called them on purpose; flames blossomed in my nightmares.
I held my hands out in front of me, remembering the one time I’d managed to bloom fire in my hands, when we were fleeing the Company. I tried to push away the memories of my past failures. My arms and hands trembled with effort. But I couldn’t call the flames, not here.
The door flew open.
Nimshi stood in the doorway. “Uncle. You told me to meet you at the wizard’s house.”
“Is that what I said?” Samael asked. “I thought I told you to go to the wizard’s house.”
“They are mine.” Nimshi’s voice was ragged with rage. “It’s not your business to torture them.”
“Perhaps you should do a better job of your business then.”
“I will not be spoken to that way in front of humans,” Nimshi growled out.
Samael rose, slowly and ponderously. “You’re little more than human yourself, boy. Walk away.”
“I will not walk away!” Nimshi spat out. His eyes flickered over to us. He drew himself up and said stiffly, “We should speak.”
“Very well,” Samael said, his voice lazy. He stood and stepped over Jacob’s legs.
Jacob rolled over onto his side as soon as Samael walked away. He groaned involuntarily as I leaned forward over him. I ran my hand across his shoulder. “Shh,” I said softly, hoping my touch would dull the edge of the pain, hoping this magic would work when nothing else did. The ability to heal each other, after all, was no spell; it was bound up in who we were and what we meant to each other. “Let me heal you.”
He started to shake his head and then gasped. His golden eyes turned to me, full of pain. I leaned forward, taking his half-broken jaw in my hands tenderly, and pressed my lips to the edge where his jaw met his ear. I hoped, at least, that wouldn’t hurt him. I kissed him again and again, my lips soft, imagining my strength flowing to him even through the most feather-light touch.
Jacob’s face turned, his lips grazing mine. I thought he was seeking my mouth, and I turned eagerly to press my lips against his.
But he turned away. He groaned.
“Jacob, don’t give up,” I begged him.
“Get away from me,” he said. He pushed me away, though there was little strength in his arm. “Ellis. Just go.”
I couldn’t go far, but I took a step back, watching his body shake like he must have trembled as a kid. It seemed so unfair that everything they did to him now hurt him twice over, bringing back the vivid memories that had faded, the fear and shame and horror. I ached for him. The restlessness of not being able to help him was going to drive me mad. I wondered if Samael would realize it were me if his intent were just to hurt me. Would he see Lilith’s eyes in mine, the way I remembered him? Samael wasn’t human anymore; maybe the memories weren’t as vivid for him. Maybe he wouldn’t recognize me.
At the same time as I knew I had to protect Jacob, my body recoiled at the thought of putting myself between him and the monster. I was afraid of the pain to come. I dreaded it like I had never dreaded anything in my life.
But I would. I would do anything for Jacob.
There was a flicker in the corner of the room, something I just glimpsed out of the corner of my eye. I leaned protectively over Jacob, determined to protect him from whatever came next, before I could make sense of what it was.
Ryker strode across the room, crouching in front of us, his powerful arms braced on the inside of his thighs. “Are you okay? I don’t have time to tell you two how pissed I am, but believe me…” He cut himself off impatiently. “Are you okay?”
“I’m fine,” I said. I looked over Jacob, who rolled away from me and Ryker. Jacob’s broad back was shivering through his thin white t-shirt, which was soaked with sweat.
“What did they do to my brother?” Ryker asked, his voice flat.
Jacob shook his head faintly, his eyes squeezed shut, his arms drawn over his face now.
“They’re torturing him,” I said. “It’s triggering his flashbacks.”
“We’re going to get you out.” Ryker promised. “Jacob?” There was a frantic edge to his voice. “You okay?”
“He’s not okay,” I said, wishing I could touch Jacob, but knowing I would make things worse. “I think Samael broke his jaw. And he passed out…”
“I’m fine,” Jacob ground out. “Just leave me alone. I don’t want you to see me like this…”
“It’s all right,” Ryker said. He sounded bewildered. “I’m not going to think any less of you. You’re my brother.”
But Jacob wouldn’t face him.
Ryker’s eyes met mine. His eyes were full of hurt and helplessness, a mirror image of mine, I imagined, and then they hardened into anger.
“What do you know about where you are?” he asked.
“We’re in D.C.,” I said. “Turner, the apothecary, he betrayed us. He might know more. And I don’t know if it will help…but there’s a portal on the floor.”
Ryker turned, taking in the room, his gaze slow and studious. “What the hell happened here?”
“Anti-love potion spell,” I said dully. It all seemed so stupid now.
His gaze swiveled back to me in a hurry, his eyes widening. “Do they know who you are?”
I shook my head. “Not yet.”
Ryker’s jaw set. “God, you two have a lot of explaining to do once you’re home safe.”
“I can almost look forward to that,” I said.
“I’ve got to stop projecting before they realize I was here,” he said. “I believe I can find you again, real-world-side. Just hang in there.”
I nodded.
He knelt next to me, reaching out a ghostly hand, even though he couldn’t really touch me. “Are you okay, Ellis?”
“No,” I said softly. “But I’ll hang in.”
His mouth twisted, as if he were hurt to leave us here. His eyes fell on Jacob, who was still now, his eyes squeezed tightly shut, blocking out the world.
“He’s taken most of it,” I said. “Protecting me.”
Ryker nodded. “I’ll be back before you know it. Don’t be…” He trailed off; it wasn’t like Ryker to say don’t be ashamed. “You’re my brother,” he said again.
There was the sound of feet in the hallway outside.
Ryker met my gaze evenly. Those deep bottle-green eyes looked into mine, promising me wordlessly that would all be well in the end.
And then he was gone.
I shivered, feeling cold without him even though he couldn’t touch us, couldn’t protect us, when he was projecting.
He believed he could find us.
And I would have to believe that too.
26
“I’m not going to let them hurt you anymore,” I told
Jacob softly, even though I knew as I said it that it was nonsense. The footsteps had receded again, giving us time for me to try to help him before we endured round seventeen.
He cracked one beautiful golden eye to look at me, and even through a swollen and bloodied eye, I had to tell him, “You’re still a master of the condescending side-eye, I see.”
“Good,” he said, his voice a croak. He coughed slightly. “Let them finish this, Ellis. Ryker and Levi will get here in time… I can buy you the time.”
“Don’t go full-gallant, not yet…”
“Samael wasn’t wrong.” His voice was rough, rasping, and I had a feeling he must have broken some ribs. “They did kill the man I was going to be.”
“I don’t miss him,” I said, resting my fingertips on that bruised and swollen cheekbone. “I like the man you are.”
He started to quirk an eyebrow at me, but then he winced. “That hurts.”
“You were just a little kid,” I said, my voice full of warmth and affection. “And you still fought them off the only way you could. You didn’t give in, you didn’t let them take your will, even though they all but destroyed you. You were the strongest and the bravest then. Just a little boy, stronger than a room full of ancient demons.”
Jacob shook his head faintly.
“It’s true,” I said. I pressed my lips to the corner of his bloodied mouth. “You are the strongest and the best now, too.”
I pulled back to look at him, to see what he thought, but his swollen eyes were both shut now.
Then he said, “You going to tell my brothers that?”
“Only if we both get out of here,” I said. “Let me heal you.”
He shook his head. “You’ll give us away.”
“I’ll leave your face ugly,” I said, kissing the other corner of his mouth. My seeking hand slid up underneath his damp t-shirt, and I felt his abs contract hard at my touch. “Let me fix you up inside, at least.”
“Can’t be done,” he said.
“Sure it can,” I said. I kissed his broad shoulder, nuzzling my nose along his neck. “You’ll have me and Ryker and Levi. You can go to therapy.”
