David was silent, and she was about to tell him to forget it when finally he answered. ‘Of course I do. But we were both so young.’
‘You still rejected me, David. Rejection is never easy to handle. First you, then my family. Oh, I’d been used to being on the outside at school, in fact, ever since my parents moved to the “money” suburb after their lottery win, but rejection, especially at such a young and impressionable age, hurts.’
‘I tried to let you down as gently as I knew how.’
‘By leaving me? By cutting yourself off?’
‘If I wasn’t around, I knew it would protect both of us from heading in a direction which was—’
‘Oh, you don’t need to explain. I understand now, being older, but still, rejection is never easy to deal with. I would have gone completely around the bend if it hadn’t been for Sasha. She was the only one, still is the only one, who’s always been there for me. It’s why I needed to come back. She needs me and I’m here.’
‘Yet you didn’t make it to her wedding.’
‘We’ve discussed this, David.’ There was a warning in her tone, a warning not to push her, but he needed to know.
‘Not really, Eden. I still don’t understand why you didn’t come. It makes no sense. Too busy helping others? Researching? Writing papers? Couldn’t that have waited? Your best friend got married and she wanted you there.’
‘Sasha understood.’
‘So you say.’
‘No, David. Sasha really understood.’
‘Then explain it to me.’
‘I’d rather not, if you don’t mind. I’ve been on enough of an emotional roller-coaster for one day and I don’t need another turn.’ She walked towards the door, eager to put some distance between them—for when he looked at her with such cold confusion Eden’s heart started to break. She was far too vulnerable right now to discuss such a topic with him. Not only because it had been one of the darkest times in her life, but because she’d no doubt end up in tears again.
‘I should get back and check on Sasha, or at least chat to Robert if Sasha’s sleeping. He’s so perfect for her.’ Eden’s smile came naturally when she thought about the way Robert and Sasha looked at each other. Along with that smile came a natural yearning to one day experience that sort of love. Would she ever find the right man? Was he standing right in front of her?
She was changing the subject and David let her, but hopefully she’d realise he wasn’t going to let the subject drop. It was important to him. He needed to understand, because not turning up for her best friend’s wedding had been so unlike the Eden he thought he’d know. He didn’t want to think he’d misjudged her character, that the young woman he’d distanced himself from was someone very different deep down inside. It was for that reason alone that he was determined to discover the real reason why she hadn’t been there to share in Sasha’s special day.
‘Yes, he’s good for Sasha. Loves her one hundred percent.’
‘It’s so rare to find that happily-ever-after, and I’m so glad it happened for Sasha. I know they’ve got a long and difficult road ahead of them, but I honestly believe they’ll make it.’
David agreed. ‘Rob’s a patient man. He’ll stand by her.’
Eden smiled. ‘Must be good that he has your approval. Good for Sasha, I mean. Your opinion means so much to her.’
‘Does it mean anything to you?’
‘Your opinion?’ Eden was a little surprised at the question. ‘Of course. I value your opinion, David. I always have.’ Didn’t the man have any idea of the influence he’d had on her life? She had measured every other man she’d come across against David. He was her yardstick, and so far no one had ever come close to matching him in integrity, in honesty, in ethics or principles, and of course looks and sex appeal. David definitely had those last two in spades.
‘Well…that’s nice to know. Hopefully you’ll trust me enough to tell me why you didn’t make it back for the wedding.’
Eden’s sigh was heavy and she gripped the door handle a little tighter. ‘It’s not that I don’t trust you, David. It’s just that…’ She knew he wasn’t going to let it go. He wanted an answer and he would eventually drag one from her. He was a man who, once he decided on something, usually followed through.
She rubbed at her temple with her free hand. ‘It’s just that it was a very difficult time in my life. But as I said, I’ve had enough emotion for now, and bringing it up would only make me upset again. I’d no doubt end up back in your arms and then we’d have to fight this…’ she waved her hand about to indicate the space between them ‘…this chemistry thing which still exists between us. I don’t have the energy for that. You say you’ve read my papers. Read them again, David, and this time read between the lines.’
It wasn’t the answer he’d been expecting, and seeing the hint of raw pain and anguish in her eyes made him feel uneasy. He shouldn’t have pushed so hard, so fast.
David nodded. ‘I’ll do that.’
‘OK.’ She opened the door, but stopped halfway through it. ‘Oh, and I’m sorry about before. The crying thing.’
‘No need to apologise. I understand.’
‘Thanks.’
‘Feeling stronger?’
Eden smiled, but it wasn’t like the other smiles which had touched her eyes, and he knew he was the one who had taken that glow from her earlier spark. ‘Back to my old self.’
‘Heaven help us.’ He rolled his eyes heavenward. ‘Go see Sasha.’
He kept his encouraging smile in place until she’d gone, but the instant he was alone he closed his eyes and shook his head. Why did the woman affect him so much? She’d been here for less than an hour and already he was so tied up in knots he’d need a steamroller to squash them out. And then he’d gone and pushed her. He’d wanted to know, and all she’d left him with was a cryptic message and a sadness around her eyes.
He recalled numerous times when she had sent him out to collect petition signatures for one lost cause or another…and he’d done it. He also remembered one occasion where she’d taken himself and Sasha to an old quarry mine simply to rescue a stray kitten she’d seen entering the dangerous zone. She’d been wild and adventurous and had really made him believe that one person, one voice, could make a difference in the world. Now…he’d upset her.
He opened his eyes and raked a hand through his hair. ‘Nice going, Montgomery.’ He walked around to his chair and sat, looking at the empty seat opposite him. Her scent still lingered in the air and the memory of how perfect she’d felt in his arms was potent. Just like before. Eden Caplan, the girl who had made him laugh, made him take a step out of his comfort zone, made him see her in a whole new light.
He knew it was inevitable that when a person grew up and had varying experiences in their life that it would change them. Sure, she still portrayed the same carefree Eden on the surface—but what was beneath the surface? A woman with scars? A woman who’d been through something that brought pain and anguish into her beautiful emerald-green eyes at the mere mention of it?
David stood and went to the bookshelf, pulling down the two volumes of paediatric journals he knew contained Eden’s published papers.
He had no need to consult the index, flicking to the page almost automatically. He’d read the articles a few times and he’d been impressed and proud of her brilliance, glad she’d put that amazing intellect of hers to good use.
One of the papers was on the specialised care of underdeveloped children in an unsterilised environment, which he knew she’d encountered daily during her work overseas in Third World countries, but it was another article he wanted, about an unusual epidemic which had resulted in over twenty unexplained deaths. The paper cited the signs and symptoms as well as the probable causes. It was a well-formulated and well-written paper, giving information in the matter-of-fact way that was required for journal publications. Emotions weren’t put on the page, but Eden had told him to read between the lines.
Alt
hough Eden was listed as the primary author of the paper, several of her colleagues’ names appeared as well. He’d initially presumed she’d come across this information second-hand and decided to publish it for the common good, which was so typically Eden, but David now realised he’d been mistaken.
‘She lived this.’ The shocked words were whispered into the cold silence of his office. He read the article again, taking particular note of the statistics in which twenty children, ranging from one to seven years of age, had died before the cause of the epidemic had been discovered.
Eden had been the one trying to save those little lives. He knew it because he knew her. She would give and give and keep on giving everything she had to any cause other people classified as lost. She rooted for the underdog. She worked hard to lift the oppressed. Eden had been the one fighting for the lives of those children, and those twenty deaths would have weighed heavily on her heart.
The time she’d made him and Sasha help her look for the lost kitten in the quarry had shown him how closely she felt loss. They’d eventually found the kitten after dark, all of them using searchlights in a fenced-off area, but the poor animal had already died.
Eden hadn’t said a word, but had lifted the creature and cradled it in her arms while they’d carried it back to her house. He’d dug a hole and they’d buried it in the backyard. She’d been solemn and sincere, saying a few brief words once he’d finished covering the small mound with dirt. Her younger brother Todd had found her grief funny, but that had been more due to his immature age than anything else.
Once the deed had been done, David and Sasha had left, but later that night he’d heard his sister on the phone, consoling a broken-hearted Eden, and he’d realised then just how deeply senseless loss affected the beautiful girl with the expressive eyes and gorgeous red hair.
Realising she’d witnessed the death of all those children, been unable to ‘fix’ them, and no doubt been with the families when the small mounds had been covered, made tears spring to his eyes.
If this was the reason Eden hadn’t made it back for Sasha’s wedding then he did understand. Just as Sasha had. He also understood why Eden wouldn’t want to discuss it. Something so deep, so tragic and unnecessary—and she would have taken it all on as her fault. As doctors, they all lost patients now and then, and they coped with that. They’d been trained to cope. But twenty children? All at once? All with the same signs and symptoms…with more to follow? His heart ached for Eden and the empathic pain he knew she would have experienced.
David shook his head, disgusted with himself for pushing her. He now had his answer and he knew he needed to apologise. It was also a relief to realise he hadn’t misjudged her. Eden missing Sasha’s wedding had surprised him, but he should have trusted her to have had a good reason. It did appear that in essentials Eden Caplan hadn’t changed at all.
Clearing his throat, he closed the journals and returned them to the shelves, wondering what he could do to apologise for trampling on her emotions. Should he get her flowers? No. She didn’t like cut flowers. A pot plant? No. She wouldn’t be in town for long. He needed to think of something.
Perhaps a nice quiet dinner at one of her favourite hangouts? That might be nice. Just the two of them. His eyes widened at the thought. He knew he’d vowed less than an hour ago to keep his distance where Eden was concerned, but his faux pas couldn’t be left as it was. Besides, they were friends. Nothing more.
He could cope for one night.
Without stopping to think further on his idea, he decided to be impulsive and hauled out the phone book, quickly locating the number of a small Italian restaurant she’d frequented in her teens. He knew it was still there because every time he drove past it he would think of her and the way she’d slurped spaghetti until the sauce was all over her face. She would laugh brightly and encourage Sasha to do the same. David shook his head, remembering the way Eden had unlocked the gate of his sister’s emotions. Sasha had been a girl who had been too shy to open up to anyone before Eden Caplan had entered their lives, filling it with laughter and sunshine.
He dialled the number and made reservations for that evening, knowing he could easily cancel them if she had other plans, although he secretly hoped she didn’t. Once it was done, he realised that it was the first spontaneous thing he’d done in a long while. He’d always equated spontaneity with Eden, and here he was, back in her presence and already acting on impulse.
He laughed at himself. ‘Really letting go, Montgomery. Dinner reservations? What a fly-by-the-seat-of-your-pants thing to do.’
Now all he had to do was to get Eden to agree to come. Would she?
Eden sat in the chair by the window, pretending to read a glossy magazine, but every so often her gaze flicked to Sasha, who was lying in bed, her eyes closed. Robert had gone to make a few phone calls, so it was just the two of them.
Eden was pleased she felt more in control. Thanks to David she’d been able to let go, to weep for her friend, and now she was ready to be strong, to get Sasha through the next few weeks at least. She flicked a page in the magazine, barely scanning it.
‘Stop faking.’ Sasha’s weak words came from the bed. Eden looked at her but didn’t move.
‘Meaning?’
‘You hate those glossy things. I remember you saying if women took the money they spent on shoes and put it towards a good charity instead, poverty in the world would be less and women wouldn’t have so many painful calluses on their feet.’
Eden smiled. ‘Well, it’s true. I mean, just look at these shoes and the price they’re asking for them.’ She held up the page so Sasha could see. ‘It’s ridiculous.’ She put the magazine down and walked towards the bed. ‘I’m not saying people shouldn’t buy shoes. Of course they need shoes to wear. But you can only wear one pair at a time.’
Sasha laughed. ‘Same old Eden.’
‘You sound like David—and enough with the old. You’re the same age I am, missy.’
Sasha reached out her hand and Eden instantly took it. ‘I know, but right now I feel ten times my age.’
‘Rubbish.’
‘Eden, it’s true.’ Sasha glanced behind her at the closed door. ‘Where’s Robert?’
‘Gone to make some phone calls. He said he wouldn’t be long. Do you want me to go find him?’
‘No.’ Sasha’s word was insistent and her big brown eyes—which were so much like her brother’s—stared at Eden. ‘I’m scared, Ede.’ Her lower lip began to quiver and her eyes instantly filled with tears. ‘I’ve put on a brave face. I’ve told everyone not to cry, not to lie and not to look back, but…’ She hiccuped. ‘I can’t walk. I can’t walk!’ The tears bubbled over. ‘One minute my life is on track, and the next I’m lying in a hospital beneath a big round X-ray machine being told my spinal cord’s been severely damaged and that I may never walk again. It’s not fair. It’s so not fair. Poor Robert looks at me like he doesn’t know what to do next, and I don’t know what I want him to do, and we’ve only been married for a few years and I love him so much, but it’s not fair to put him through this, but if he leaves I’ll just shrivel up into nothing, and I have to know…What am I supposed to do now?’ She broke down and sobbed, clinging to Eden’s arm.
Eden reached for a tissue with her free hand and gently dabbed the tears away, brushing the hair from her friend’s face. The door to the private room opened and Eden glanced up as David slipped in. She silently communicated that he should stay back, which he did. Sasha’s sobs were so heartwrenching, so full of pain and despair it really was heartbreaking, but Eden was glad Sasha had finally broken down.
Softly she spoke. ‘This is what you’re supposed to do, Sash. You’re supposed to cry, honey. You’re allowed to wallow, to feel sorry for yourself. You need to let the emotions out so the healing can come in.’ She leaned closer and kissed Sasha’s forehead. ‘Don’t be ashamed to cry.’
Sasha reached up with her other arm and hooked it around Eden’s neck, holding her friend close
as she cried. Eden could feel the pain, feel the anguish, and it was impossible to stop her own tears.
‘I hate feeling sorry for myself,’ Sasha whispered. ‘What if I get so depressed I stay that way?
‘Not going to happen. You’re too strong for that. Besides, a little depression is more than natural given what you’ve been through. You need to let it out, let out the stress and the anxiety and the uncertainty. You are surrounded by people who love you.’
Eden looked over at David and he walked towards his sister. Sasha looked up at him and David’s heart constricted at the look in her eyes. It was as though she was six years old again and had done something wrong, and didn’t have a clue what to do next.
‘Cry, my sweet friend, because you’ll feel much better—I promise.’ Eden spoke softly but clearly near Sasha’s ear. ‘It’s OK to cry. It’s OK,’ she soothed. ‘I’m here, David’s here, and let’s not forget that brilliant husband of yours. We won’t let you fall.’ Eden sniffed as she spoke, her voice thick with emotion as she made such solemn promises to her friend. Tears slid down her cheeks as she felt Sasha’s pain. Her tears must have landed on Sasha because her friend looked up.
‘Why are you crying?’ Sasha asked, sniffing and releasing her grip on Eden to reach for a tissue.
‘Me? I’m not crying.’ She wiped at her own eyes, belying her words. ‘I merely have itchy eyes. On my way here I walked by the catering hall and they were chopping heaps of onions. I must have breathed in deeper than I thought and that’s why my eyes are watering. Crying? Pffttt!’ She waved the suggestion away as though it was ludicrous.
Sasha started laughing at the ridiculous excuse. ‘That’s our Eden. Isn’t it, David? Always saying the craziest things.’
David looked across at Eden and acknowledged the deep, abiding friendship the two women had shared for most of their lives. For two weeks he’d watched his sister being brave, helping everyone else to deal with what had happened. He’d been deeply concerned that her own grieving process hadn’t started, but now he realised she’d simply been waiting…waiting for Eden. Eden would be strong for Sasha, would help his sister through this difficult time.
Bride on the Children's Ward / Marriage Reunited: Baby on the Way Page 4
