“I’m okay,” I gave her a reassuring smile, but when she narrowed her eyes and tightened her lips, I knew she’d seen through me.
“Where are you taking her?” Susan demanded.
Kavvan never slowed his steps as he answered. “To medical.”
Gray metals walls lined the corridor. One by one, lights passed by overheard. Other Azziarins stepped out of Kavvan’s way as he walked with fast, sure steps. There were symbols on the outside of each door we passed, and I assumed it was Azziarin writing.
A door slid open and another Azziarin rushed over. “Commander?” His eyes slid from me to Kavvan.
“Sora, Amanda has a bad cut on her leg… among other things. She needs to be healed in the medi-chamber, and I need another injection.”
“Yes, Commander.”
Kavvan stopped near the far side of the wall where something the shape of an oversized casket sat longways. It had a glass top with various lighted controls and sensors.
“She needs to get undressed,” Sora said as he touched several panels, making them hum to life.
“I’ll help her,” Susan said, smiling at me.
I watched as Kavvan’s jaw tightened in response before he said, “Sora, leave us.”
Kavvan sat me down and retrieved a blanket. “I’ll keep you covered.”
Susan turned incredulous eyes on him. “Kavvan, you can wait outside why I help Amanda.” With narrowed eyes, I zeroed in on her hand when she wrapped it tenderly around his upper arm and said, “Please.”
Jealousy wasn’t something I was used to, but it flared inside me as I stared at Susan’s hand. They apparently knew each other very well.
He shook his head while holding Susan’s gaze. “Fine, whatever,” she puffed. It wasn’t like her not to put up more of a fight.
Susan turned back toward me and I adverted my eyes, not wanting her to see the jealousy on my face. “Amanda, I’m going to help you get undressed. If it’s okay, Kavvan can hold up the blanket so no one can see you if they accidently walk in.”
“I’m not helpless, you know, I can undress myself.”
When Kavvan help the blanket up, he stared me straight in the eyes while I shrugged one arm out of the sleeve. Not wanting to see his reaction, I turned my back to him and let the silver jumpsuit bunch around my lower legs. I heard the tiny gasp and squeezed my eyes shut. He didn’t have to say anything, I knew what he saw.
The blanket, along with his two strong arms, wrapped around me from behind. Everything was covered from the neck down. I turned, saw the emotion in his eyes, and said, “Thank you.”
A minute later, Sora walked in. “Is the female ready?”
After holding my gaze, saying nothing, Kavvan finally replied, “Yes, she is.”
“All right.” He opened the lid to the chamber, and I crawled inside.
Before the glass hatch closed over my head, Kavvan gave me a tender smile and said, “I’ll be here when you’re finished healing.”
I nodded. The glass hatch locked into place, and the last thing I saw was Susan clutching Kavvan’s arm before they turned and walked away.
Tears flowed freely down my face. I wasn’t worthy of someone like Kavvan, and by the looks of it, Susan and Kavvan already had something going on between them.
My eyes felt heavy, and whether it was from the adrenaline crash or medicine inside the chamber, I didn’t know. I couldn’t hold them open any longer.
“Please, Mom, no!” I tried to yank my arm away, but her grip was so tight.
“Come here, you little brat.” She yanked me even closer as she puffed on her cigarette. The smell always made me sick as it clogged my nose. “I told you to stay in your room.”
“I was hungry,” I cried, tears failing down my puffy cheeks.
“One of these days you’ll learn to do as your told.”
“No! Please don’t!” She took a long drawl from her cigarette, puffed out the smoke, and stuck the end of the cigarette to my arm. I screamed in pain, trying to tear my arm away from her strong grip.
“Maybe this time you’ll learn your lesson. Now go to your room, you ungrateful little brat.”
The dream changed.
I was sleeping in my little twin-sized bed when a heavy weight pressed it down, waking me up. I was nine, almost ten. I wiped my sleepy eyes, looked up and saw a man staring down at me.
“Where’s Mom?” I asked.
“Your mom is passed out. She won’t be waking up for a long time.”
I didn’t know why he was in my room until he reached out and snaked his hand under the hem of my shirt. I screamed and kicked at the man.
“Shut up!” he said, trying to get me under his control.
I thrashed until I wiggled away and grabbed my softball bat, holding it up in a swinging position. “Mommmm!” I yelled, but like always, she never came.
He stepped closer with a malevolent grin. He never expected I’d do it, but when he stepped closer, I swung with all my might and hit him in the kneecap. When he went down to the floor, yelling and holding his leg, I leaped across him and fled the room. It was cold and dark outside the apartment with only a few streetlights in the distance, but I wasn’t going back in. I hid outside the window on the fire escape until morning came and the man left.
Kavvan
“Sora, get her out of there, NOW!”
“Commander, she hasn’t finished healing yet.”
“How much longer?”
“Another ten standard minutes should do it.”
Another ten standard minutes, and I’d lose my sanity. I had escorted Susan back to her quarters, explained in not so much detail what had happened, and when I returned, I watched as tears flowed down Amanda’s face.
That wasn’t supposed to happen. It should be a restful, healing sleep, not what she was experiencing. I paced as my mind thought of every horrible thing that could’ve happened. I’d seen the many small circular scars on her back and wanted to rip someone apart for causing her harm.
“Commander,” I turned to the sound of Sora’s voice, “let me give you another injection.”
I nodded and followed Sora into his office. After what Amanda had experienced, the last thing I needed was to scare her with the mating fever.
Ten standard minutes felt more like a lifetime. When Sora opened the medi-chamber, I immediately scooped her up in my arms and held her tight to my chest. Her eyes fluttered open.
“What’s wrong?” she asked, wiping the moisture from her eyes.
“You were leaking moisture from your eyes. I know this means you are sad.” I threaded my fingers through her long, dark, silky hair, trying to make myself feel better as well as her.
“Sorry,” she squirmed, “put me down.”
Reluctantly, I set her on her feet. She clutched the blanket tightly around her shoulders. “How does your leg feel?”
She tested her weight as she looked down at her leg. “Good. I can’t believe it healed that quickly. How long was I in there?”
“Longer than expected. Some of the scars were deeper than others, so it took longer to heal the damaged skin.”
I watched as her cheeks turned red before she turned her head. “But the cut on my leg was worse.”
“Yes, but it was a fresh wound with no scarring.”
“Can you take me to Susan? I know she must be worried sick.”
“I can. When I escorted her to her quarters, I explained a little about what had happened.”
Amanda clutched the blanket tightly around her body, and with my hand on the small of her back, I led her down the corridor.
“You and Susan seem close,” Amanda said without looking at me.
I wasn’t sure what she meant, so I shrugged. “I guess so.”
“You’ve spent a lot of time together. I can tell.”
Her voice sounded off, and when I sniffed the air, I could smell sadness. I wanted to comfort her, but I didn’t know what to do. Amanda had been through so much, and I still didn’t know if
the Travistion had… I couldn’t think about it. The medi-chamber would have healed any damage he inflicted, but it couldn’t heal the mental trauma.
When the door slid open, Susan quickly stood and rushed over. “Mandy, are you okay?” She grabbed Amanda’s hand and pulled her into a giant hug.
“I’m fine, Susan.”
I leaned against the door and briefly watched the interaction between the females. The bond they shared was easy to see. After they released each other, I stepped forward and addressed Amanda. “I need to check on my ship. I’ll be back soon with some food.”
Susan walked forward with a smile on her face. She placed the palm of her hand on my chest, and peered up at me with soft eyes. “Don’t worry about Amanda; I’ll take good care of her.”
Amanda turned her back to us, and when I glanced down at Susan’s smiling face, I felt the wrongness of it. “I’ll be back with some food.”
“Thanks, Kavvan.” Susan skimmed my chest with her hand just before I stepped backward. Amanda still wouldn’t look my way.
Nikkul and Padda stepped in line behind me when I headed for my ready room. I immediately poured us all a drink before I took a seat at my desk.
“Report, Padda.” I took a sip and waited.
“Everything is on schedule. We rendezvous with the Galatin in four standard hours, and we’ll transfer the females that Var rescued.”
Turning my attention to Nikkul, I asked, “What happened to you on the planet?”
Padda grinned. “This should be good.”
Nikkul leaned back in his chair, took a sip of his drink, and smiled. “What can I say? The brute knocked me over the head, and when I woke up, my true mate was standing in front of me.”
“How did they get the drop on you?” I asked with wonderment. Nikkul was hard to best, and he should have smelled them coming.
Nikkul took another sip, one side of his mouth tipped upward as he admitted, “When I smelled my mate, I lost focus and followed her scent. I didn’t expect it to turn hostile.”
“And you mated her, just like that?” Padda asked. He looked just as surprised as I when I realized Nikkul had mated Jane.
“Just like that. I carried her to the bathing chamber, ordered everyone out, ravished her body, and made her my mate.”
“And everyone just left?” Padda scooted to the edge of his chair and rested his elbows on his knees.
“I don’t really know.” He took another sip. “And at the time, I didn’t care.”
I laughed, happy that it turned out well for him. I took a sip and asked, “What about Sonyya?”
Nikkul’s smile disappeared. “I don’t know.” He took several gulps of his drink. “What about you? You’re very protective of that other female.”
“Susan?” Padda asked Nikkul.
“No. Amanda.”
I sat silently and took another sip of Fire’s Breath. The mood shifted. I looked up and told them the story and what had happened.
“Did the Travistion rape her?” Nikkul asked. His anger almost matched my own.
“I don’t know. I was afraid to ask.” I took another sip. “I also noted scars on various parts of her body. She has been abused.”
“Sish!”
“My thoughts exactly. Fighting the mating fever is taking every ounce of strength I have, but I’m afraid to say or do the wrong thing around her.”
The room remained silent as each of them sipped his drink.
8
_____________________
Jealousy
Amanda
When Susan placed her hand on Kavvan’s chest, I had to turn away. The jealous feelings were ugly and unwanted, even though I couldn’t stop their onslaught.
Susan was my best friend, the one who helped me cope with what had happened and the one who gave me strength to stand up for myself at a young age. I would never let a man come between us, so I willed those feelings away.
When I heard the door close, I turned and faced a serious-looking Susan.
“What the hell happened to you, chickee? You came back here with cuts all over you, bruises everywhere.” Susan headed to the closet, pulled out some clothes, and then tossed them to me. As I slipped the red dress over my head, she poured us something to drink and handed me a mug.
I sniffed. “Alcohol?” She nodded. “Thank God!”
“Now tell me.” Susan took my hand and pulled me to the couch.
I shrugged. “Short version. I watched the Azziarin buy you and then cart you away. I robbed a store, slept in the woods, met an animal I named Cotton. Jane, another human, rescued me.”
“Got it. Now what happened to your leg?”
“When I ran from the cave, I literally ran into a hired gun. The store owner wanted me found, I guess. He dragged me away by the hair on my head. That’s how I got all the scrapes and cuts.”
She narrowed her eyes. “What else?”
I stared down at the dark brown liquid and swirled it around in the cup. “He tore off my clothes and tried to rape me.”
I looked at Susan with tear-filled eyes.
“But he didn’t?”
“No. Kavvan tore him away from me before he got the chance.”
“And it reminded you of the other times.”
“Yes.”
“Amanda, they never got the chance. You made sure of that.”
I sighed. “I know. But I always had to sleep with my bat close by and with one eye open at all times.”
“I could kill your mother!” Susan spat. “I hate that woman. I don’t think I’ve ever hated anyone so much.”
I laughed. “And what about yours?”
“Yeah, I could kill her, too. Let’s hope they died in the invasion.” We both chuckled. She always made me feel better.
“Is it awful that I hope they did?” I half smiled and took a swig. It tasted smooth, and the tension started to ease.
“Hell, no. That thought alone gives me warm fuzzies at night.”
I laughed, took another drink, and asked, “So, you and Kavvan?” I raised an eyebrow.
“He is wonderful, isn’t he?” Susan smiled dreamily.
My gut clenched with her answer. I was hoping for something like they were just friends.
I shrugged. “He kept that Neanderthal from raping me.”
“My hero,” Susan said with a smile.
The door chimed, and when it slid open, Jane and Clara stood at the entrance.
“Come in,” Susan called out to them.
“Amanda, are you okay?” Both Jane and Clara rushed in, their eyes scanning for the wounds that were now healed.
“I’m fine.” Smiling, I grabbed Susan’s arm. I wanted them to meet my best friend. “This is Susan, the one I told you about.” Looking at Susan, I continued, “This is Clara, and this is Jane.”
Jane’s eyes shot to the mug I held in my hand. “Is that what I hope it is?” She raised an eyebrow.
“Yep,” I grinned. “Susan, drinks for everyone!”
Jane took a drink. “Ahh… that’s good stuff.”
Clara sniffed, took a sip, and then started coughing. I patted her on the back. When she took another, I laughed aloud.
~~~~
Clara lay on the floor holding her stomach, laughing hysterically. Susan nudged me and whispered, “Did she even finish the first one?”
“Nope,” I chuckled as I gulped my second drink.
“Lightweight,” Susan scoffed. “Hey Clara? Ever been drunk before?”
“Yes,” she giggled. “I’m drunk now.”
“I bet your life was all ponies and daisies, wasn’t it?”
“I never owned a pony.” She rolled onto her stomach and with wide eyes, she said excitedly, “But I always wanted one. Can we get a pony?”
“No!” we all shouted at the same time.
“Darn it!” She rolled onto her back and stared at the ceiling.
Silence filled the room for a moment until Jane asked, “So, what’s the deal with you and Kavvan?�
�
I thought she was speaking to me, but Susan answered.
“He is so handsome, and so sweet. When I came on to him, I could feel that he wanted me,” she giggled, “if you know what I mean. But he said that he wouldn’t take advantage of me in my vulnerable state.” She sighed dreamily. “Isn’t that noble of him? He worried more about me than his own desires.”
Jane’s eyes shot to mine and I could see the oh, shit look on her face. “You know, Susan,” Jane started, “the Azziarins find their true mate by smell. It doesn’t matter if he’s into you. When he finds the one, everything else is obsolete.”
She scrunched her nose. “He said that I wasn’t his mate, but that’s okay, I don’t want one. I just wanted… you know.”
I refilled my mug and downed the entire thing. My head was fuzzy, and the room spun in front of me.
“Are you okay, Amanda?” Jane steadied my arm.
“Yeah, I think so.” I didn’t want to hear about Susan’s relationship with Kavvan, real or imagined. Just thinking about the two of them together was driving me insane.
Speak of the devil. The door slid open and in walked Kavvan and Nikkul. Nikkul pulled a happy Jane into his strong arms. She giggled like a schoolgirl.
“How much have you had to drink?” Nikkul asked Jane as he smiled lovingly down at her.
“Enough,” she said, making everyone laugh.
I glanced up at Kavvan and was surprised to catch him staring at me. My heart raced with excitement as I openly drank in his appearance. Snow-white hair curled slightly around his ears. A tan, chiseled jaw led to luscious, full lips. His muscled chest and arms were covered with a black uniform jumpsuit that all Azziarins on this ship seemed to favor.
I don’t know how long I stared, but the trance was broken when I heard Susan speak.
“Kavvan, come over her and sit down with me.” She patted the seat next to her.
His eyes shifted momentarily to Susan’s before sliding back and holding my gaze. I swallowed and looked away.
Kavvan (The Azziarin Series Book 7) Page 8
