I leaned back and thought of my little girl, my husband holding her and welcoming me home. I’d always heard that your life would flash before your eyes during the last minutes, but the only thing I saw was them. I held out my arms, and she reached for me. The feel of her little body, the smell of her hair. I closed my eyes and smiled. I was home. I was happy.
Amanda
I grabbed my head with both hands. It hurt. Shit! How much Fire’s Breath did we drink last night? I looked around. Everyone was up, and they looked the same way I felt.
Sometime during the night, we’d made it into Sydney’s cabin. It looked like a more traditional house on Earth. When Susan asked her about it, she shrugged. “What? It’s a touch of home.”
Chloe came walking through, unfazed from the night before. Alan also looked mostly normal. Clara had barely moved. Susan was sprawled out on the couch. “Where’s Jane?”
“I don’t know. Check the bedroom.” I gave Sydney a half-smile, even though I felt like I would puke at any moment.
I searched the bedroom, the other bedroom, and the bathroom before walking down to the beach. Nothing. I headed back inside the house. “I can’t find Jane anywhere.”
Chloe walked up beside me and laid a steady hand on my shoulder. “When did you see her last?”
“I don’t know. Ah…” I scrunched my nose and tried to remember. “At the beach. She went for a walk last night.”
Chloe nodded. “Did anyone see her come back last night?” A chorus of no’s sounded around the room.
Sydney passed out water, which everyone gladly accepted.
“Okay, let’s fan out and look for Jane. Did anyone notice which direction she headed?” It was easy to see that Chloe was a take-charge type of person.
“I think she went down the beach, but I’m not sure.” I didn’t understand why she would walk off and not come back. Something must have happened to her. I didn’t know what dangers this planet held, but… or maybe she got lost. That could’ve happened.
“Let’s fan out and search for her.”
Sydney and Krista, the two pregnant women, waited at the house. Chloe and Clara headed up the beach while Susan, Alan, and I headed down the beach.
“So, Alan. You and the princess?” Susan waggled her eyebrows.
“Not if her family has anything to say about it.”
“Why don’t you just stand up to them?”
“It’s not as simple as that. If it were just her family, I would. But there are other factors in play.”
“Like what?”
“Susan, leave him alone.”
“What? I’m just curious.”
Alan did offer a little insight. “I can’t mate her because I don’t have fangs. And that’s just one problem.”
“Oh.”
I chuckled. That shut Susan up. We continued walking, and I couldn’t help but admire the beauty. This was truly a gorgeous planet. A white round pebble gleaming in the black sand snagged my attention. I kicked it as I walked, watching it tumble down the beach. When Alan spoke again, he startled me.
“Although I found my sister, it’s very hard to be the only human man on Azziar. Kattlyn accepts me, and I know that we are meant to be together, but I don’t fit in anywhere here.”
“I’m sorry.” And I meant it. “I know what it’s like not to belong anywhere. Not to be wanted.” I shook my head and pushed the bad memories aside. They had no place in my new life. “Just… try. That’s all you must do. Keep trying.”
“I will.”
In those few moments, it felt like we’d bonded a little more.
We walked for what seemed like hours. In the distance, I spotted Jane lying on the beach. She looked so peaceful. I smiled. Hopefully today would be a better day. She could talk with Nikkul, and they could work everything out. I even felt better about Kavvan. Yesterday was just so overwhelming.
My smile slipped as we neared. I shook my head in disbelief. What was that red stuff in the sand? Jane looked so pale as she slept. I stopped, unable to move closer as my mind tried to register what my eyes were seeing.
Alan took off in a sprint, and when he neared Jane, he dropped to his knees. Two fingers pressed against Jane’s neck before he dropped his head. After a few seconds, his eyes locked with mine and he shook his head. I knew Jane was dead.
“Why would she do that?” Susan’s voice quivered when she spoke.
It didn’t make sense. I grabbed Susan’s hand and we walked forward with hesitation, one slow step at a time.
“She left a note. It’s hard to read because it’s in the sand, but it’s still a note.” Alan said as he stood.
“What does it say?” I swallowed hard, trying to process why this was happening.
I forgive you, Nikkul. Forgive me.
Be happy.
I’m joining my family.
“What does she mean, she’s joining her family?” Alan looked to Susan and me for answers.
Susan shrugged. Tears ran down my face as I thought of one of the first conversations I’d had with Jane. “She was married and had a little girl. Her husband and little girl were killed in a car accident.”
“I guess you never get over something like that,” Susan mused as she stared at Jane lying peacefully in the sand.
I swiped the tears away. “We need to go tell the others.”
Susan nodded and then said, “Wait. Are we just going to leave her here?”
“I’ll stay with her.” Alan sat down next to Jane and stared at the water.
Susan and I both nodded before we took off, heading back to the beach house. Before, it felt like we’d walked for hours, but it took more like thirty minutes to sprint back.
Sydney and Krista waited on the porch. “Did you find her?” Sydney called out. When she saw my expression, her eyes widened as she asked, “What happened? Is she hurt?”
How did I tell her what had happened? Just blurt it out? I’d never had to deliver bad news before. My head was in a fog, still trying to understand how someone could do something like that. I didn’t understand.
“We found her on the beach. She slit her wrists.” My head turned sharply to Susan, who had just blurted it out.
“Oh, no!” Sydney covered her mouth with her hand.
Krista’s lips trembled when she asked, “Did we cause this?”
“No,” Susan waved Krista’s question away. “You can’t rationalize what an irrational mind is thinking. Don’t even try.” My eyes widened at Susan, who the hell was she, Sigmund Freud? She looked at me and noticed my gaping mouth. “What? I read, you know.”
I shook my head in disbelief and asked, “What do we do?”
“I need to let Jakke know.”
“You can do that?” I thought we were secluded out here. I never dreamed she had a way to contact Jakke.
Sydney smiled, even though it didn’t reach her eyes. “You know they invented space travel, advanced healing, and advanced weaponry. Do you not think they can invent a phone?”
I felt like an idiot. Of course, they had ways to communicate. Sydney headed back inside while Susan and I, along with Krista, took a seat on the porch. This house really did remind me of the houses back home. A three-bedroom, with a porch and a swing. Sitting here, I could look at the beach and the water as it crashed into rocks. The ideal beach house, here, or on Earth. Peaceful, even in a time of crisis.
We sat in silence until the others came walking from the opposite direction. “No luck,” Chloe called out. “How about you? Did you find her?”
No one answered at first. Finally, Susan yelled, “We did.”
I dreaded telling Clara—she knew Jane best and would take it the hardest.
“Where was she?” Chloe asked just before she took the two steps up to the porch and plopped down in a chair.
“Ah… she…ah…” I tried but just couldn’t do it.
“She killed herself.”
I watched Clara closely. Her chin quivered until she turned her head away. Wha
t a terrible, awful mess.
Kavvan
King Mallik, Jakke, Kollin, Dazz, Nikkul, Kattlyn, and I sat in the king’s office. It was a tense situation, and at first, no one spoke. They just took sips of Fire’s Breath, trying to quell the anger.
Kattlyn broke the silence. “I don’t care what any of you think. Alan is my mate.”
No’s came in unison from King Mallik, Jakke, and Dazz.
“So, you can have humans, but I can’t? You want me to share a mate when you will not? Because if I mate an Azziarin, he will have consorts.”
King Mallik looked at his daughter. “If was fine for your mother, and it is our way.”
“No, it wasn’t fine with her!” Kattlyn yelled at her father. “She was miserable most of the time, watching you with your consorts. I think the human females have it right when they say you call it tradition so you can sleep with whomever you want!”
“You will not talk to me that way.” King Mallik leveled an authoritative gaze on his daughter.
“Well, someone needs to.” She took a drink of Fire’s Breath, something unusual for her and the females on Azziar. Kattlyn huffed a breath and smiled, but it looked more sinister when she said with a low, matter-of-fact voice, “But don’t worry. I’m sure the Curazins will let Alan and me live with them on their planet. Because I will leave before I give him up.”
“You will not leave this planet,” Jakke said without any emotion in his voice.
Jakke’s personal comm beeped. “Excuse me,” he said as he left the office. “I’ll be right back.
Last night had been full of worry and anger. How could Amanda just leave me like that? Without a word. We searched everywhere we knew to search and found nothing. We even checked out Aydan’s house, hoping the humans would seek out a familiar place. Nothing. They were not at Risshi and Mara’s. We’d exhausted every place we thought they might go. There was nothing else to do but wait.
Jakke walked back in with a grim look on his face. “We need to go.”
I jumped to my feet. “Where are they?”
Jakke shook his head in what looked like disbelief. “Sydney had a beach house built as a surprise for me and Alex. They are there.”
“Let’s go.”
~~~~~
As soon as the hovercar came to a stop, I jumped out and ran toward the house. Amanda sat on the porch, looking as sad as I’d ever seen her. She jumped up when she spotted me.
“Kavvan!” She sprinted my direction and as she neared, she jumped into my arms. “Oh, Kavvan! I’m so sorry I left. Please forgive me. Please. I won’t leave again without telling you. I’m sorry!”
The relief of holding her in my arms was astonishing. “It’s all right,” I smiled as I wiped her tears away with my thumbs and kissed her forehead.
She shook her head no. “It’s not all right. I should’ve never left. I love you.”
“I love you, too.”
I pulled her tight, her cheek resting against my chest. In the distance, I heard Nikkul yell, “No!” Something wasn’t right.
I kissed the top of Amanda’s head and asked, “What is going on?”
She squeezed me tighter before I barely heard the words. “Jane killed herself.”
What?
I couldn’t have heard her right. But as I watched Nikkul, I knew that I had. I watched as Susan led him and the others down the beach. I held my mate as she cried, thankful to have her in my arms.
“What happened?” I squeezed her tighter.
“I don’t know. Last night she said she was going for a walk, but she never came back. She left a note that said she forgave him and to be happy.”
I closed my eyes. Sonyya. She must have noticed the love her and Nikkul shared. “I’m sorry, Amanda.”
She sniffed, then stepped back. With an unreadable expression, she asked, “Do you have consorts?”
I laughed, but it held no humor. “No, and I will never have anyone but you.”
“Promise?”
“Yes,” I pulled her close and held her tight. Nikkul lost his true mate, but mine was in my arms, and I would not let her go. My beautiful, damaged, loving mate.
14
____________________
Healing
Amanda
The small service for Jane was nice. Simple. Apparently, Azziar didn’t have such a thing, but Sydney and the rest of us demanded it. Nikkul was still in mourning, but he had brought Sonyya for comfort. At first, it angered me to see her there, but then Kavvan explained that Nikkul loved both Jane and Sonyya just as Jane had loved both her husband and Nikkul. It made sense. No one caused Jane to do what she did, she just thought she was doing what was best for everyone. When I saw the love Sonyya had for Nikkul, how she comforted him, I understood that. I think everyone else did, as well. I still worried about Clara. She seemed more subdued and quiet, not like her normal self. Susan stayed with Clara, and I knew she would help her. She was great like that. Sydney gave them a room at the castle.
Kavvan had his arm around me, leading me to a hovercar. I couldn’t wait to start my life with him. Especially after everything we’d experienced.
“Where are we going?” I asked as I smiled at him. Alien or not, I loved him.
“To your new home.”
“You don’t live here?” I pointed over my shoulder at the castle.
He laughed and shook his head. “I am not the king, or a prince.”
We climbed into the hovercar and traveled a short distance. My mouth dropped at the house in front of me. Nestled between two immense trees stood a narrow house that extended upward instead of out.
Four steps led up to the porch; my hand slid along the thick, rounded, wooden handrail. The first floor was a small living room with a couch, table, and a small chair. The floor was polished dark wood; the walls were light. A spiral staircase rose in the center of the room. I walked over and looked up. “Oh my God!” My eyes were wide in surprise and wonder.
I headed up the staircase to the second floor—a modern kitchen with marbled countertops.
“This is a food replicator,” Kavvan said as he walked up behind me and placed his hand on my shoulder.
“So, we don’t have to cook?”
He grinned and shook his head. “Not unless we want to.”
I smiled at him over my shoulder. “Cooking is not my thing.”
I glanced around the kitchen one last time before taking the stairs to the third level, where I found a bedroom with a massive bed on one side, a bathroom on the other. Although beautiful, it was nothing unexpected. Anxious to see what was next, I grabbed the wooden handrail and slowly took the stairs. Anticipation drummed inside me. I knew it would be something miraculous.
“Oh, Kavvan!” He laughed as I circled the fourth floor. It was open, a deck on top of the house, with small loveseat and table, a massive bed, and a large round tub. I turned amazed eyes on him. “But how?”
He laughed. “How what?”
I walked over to the edge, where a massive rail circled the deck. The view was breathtaking, more amazing than Sydney’s beach house. I turned toward him and asked, “How do you keep warm, keep cool, how do you keep the rain from soaking everything?”
“First, this is the cold season.” He smiled. “Second, look up.”
I tilted my head back between my shoulders. Wow! The trees on each side of the house were so massive that a canopy completely covered the upper deck. A natural roof.
“This is perfect.”
“This is your house now.” He smiled as he closed the distance between us.
My breath hitched as I finally realized, this was my new life. Kavvan was my husband. I wanted him more than I’d ever wanted anyone, anything, in my life. It took me a while to actually believe that he wanted me, and by the look in his eye, he wanted me right then.
Grabbing the hem of my dress, I pulled it over my head and threw it on the floor. His nostrils flared at the sight of me standing in lacy panties and high heels, compliments of Sydn
ey. “You have too many clothes on.”
Grabbing each side of his uniform, he ripped it apart. I closed the distance between us. It’d been far too long since I’d felt him inside me. He never kissed me, not deeply—I was a little afraid of his teeth—but I needed everything. I nipped at his lower lip before licking the edges.
He growled low and then hoisted me up, my legs wrapping around his waist. With his strong hands gripping my ass, he carried me to the bed. “Wait!” I said as he came down on top of me. He froze. “I want to be on top.”
He grinned wickedly as I moved out of the way. He lay back on the bed and put his hands behind his head, leaving his body open to me. I’d always wanted to try something, but I hesitated, worried about what he would think. Ah fuck it! I thought as I climbed on top.
I kissed his lips and then turned around, giving him a wonderful view of my sex. I took his shaft in my hand before licking the head. He groaned and arched his hips. “Oh, Amanda! That feels so good.”
I kept working my mouth up and down his shaft, only able to take about half of it. I started and then moaned when I felt his tongue swipe my center before plunging inside. As he continued, I couldn’t take it anymore. I wanted to feel him, feel his shaft buried deep inside me. Instead of saying anything, my mouth left his shaft with a pop. Still facing away from him, I moved forward. When I felt the head of his shaft at my entrance, I sank down, taking him to the hilt. I rode him with a slow steady rhythm.
“Amanda, you’re killing me.” He grabbed my hips and held me in place while he thrust at a faster, harder pace. I braced my hands on his knees, needing the support. Looking at the amazing landscape, the setting sun, I closed my eyes and threw my head back while I shattered into a million pieces. I faintly heard Kavvan’s grunts as he followed me with his own release.
Kavvan (The Azziarin Series Book 7) Page 13
