by Holly Rayner
He ordered them the most expensive wine on the menu, a Cabernet Sauvignon, and Charlotte wondered if he actually knew anything about wine, in his tech-filled brain, or if he usually just ordered the most expensive, knowing he had money to burn. She didn’t dare ask. Rather, she busied herself with her menu, worried she had already seemed too eager, too into him. She wanted to play coy—at least for now.
The waiter took their order moments later, and in a state of minor panic, Charlotte chose the pasta—the cheaper option—and noted that Sean ordered the steak. She folded her hands over her lap, watching as Sean poured her a glass of wine and filled his own. His dark eyes sparkled with the light over the lake.
“This might be the most beautiful thing I’ve ever seen,” he said.
“In all your years, this sunset over this lake is it for you?” she asked, laughing.
He shrugged, laughing slightly. “Do you want to make a toast?”
“Sure,” she said, straightening herself. “I think we should toast to our upcoming work. To beating Evan Greene at his own game. And to telling the world that you, Sean Lawson, haven’t taken anything from anyone. You’ve reached out and grasped the world for yourself. And I respect that, more than anything.” She gave him an intimate look before clinking his glass and lifting her own to her lips.
They eased into the date, dancing around each other with their words. They were both playful with each other, and Charlotte hadn’t expected this—she hadn’t expected such ease of conversation with a billionaire.
Charlotte chewed her meal slowly when it came, allowing the flavor to glide over her tongue. It was truly the best pasta she’d ever had, with a perfect pesto sauce and a delicious, fresh salad. She didn’t want to rave about it; she wanted to seem a bit higher class. But she assumed Sean knew how special this was to her.
“This lake,” Sean suddenly spoke, placing his fork and knife onto his half-finished plate. “I can’t get enough of it. I should come camping out here some time.”
“Do you camp by yourself?” she asked him, surprised.
“I do. I like to go in the early fall, when the leaves are changing and when the weather’s about to turn. I feel closest to the earth, then. Calmer.”
“I wouldn’t have expected such a techie to be enamored with nature,” she said. “I mean, appreciating a sunset is one thing. But going out into the wild, building a fire, picking berries and such? I wouldn’t have pegged you for it.”
“Sure. I used to do it when college got to be too much for me. I’d go out into the northeastern woods and pray I wouldn’t find a bear.” He laughed. “But honestly, my entire life, I’ve preferred things that don’t cost anything. I know money is a huge issue. It’s the reason I started InvestMe.”
“I saw the speech,” Charlotte teased. “I have a pretty good sense for why you started it.”
“Good point,” Sean laughed. “But beyond InvestMe, beyond this really lovely dinner, beyond that limousine, I mostly appreciate the simple things. And in so many ways, the little things—like just talking here with you, or remembering bits of the past, like that cufflink—are all free. And they have real meaning. I think that’s my favorite part of being alive. Living for the little things.”
Charlotte leaned back, smiling widely. His words spoke to her. She felt all reservations about being on a date with her client fall away, and she felt her heart begin to beat with lust and passion for this man. In so many ways, she was still that eighteen-year-old girl, enamored with Sean in every way.
“That was beautifully put,” she whispered. She leaned toward him. “I think my father is like that. He hates money. Complains about it constantly. Can’t imagine why I wanted to be involved with the tech law scene over here, if only because it reeks of money. Of course, he’s an insurance salesman. So it doesn’t quite make sense, does it?”
Sean raised his eyebrows. “I suppose we all have to do what we have to do. And you, my dear, had to become a lawyer. It’s in your blood. I can smell it on you.”
“I’m not one of those stinking, New York lawyers that smell perpetually of hot dogs and whiskey, am I?” she laughed.
“No,” Sean said, shaking his head. “You just have a fire about you. You have something extra. I can’t put my finger on it.” He brought his hand toward hers on the table, and Charlotte looked down, assessing the tiny space between them. She swallowed, feeling suddenly anxious.
After dinner, Sean suggested they take a stroll by the lake, and Charlotte readily agreed, feeling that she was already nose-deep—she might as well put her hair under.
“Have you ever gone skinny dipping?” Charlotte asked him, gazing out across the water. The light illuminated his face, giving a glow to all his features, and she felt silly for how much she loved looking at him.
“Skinny dipping? Let me see,” he said, stroking his perfect jaw. “I have gone by myself, but never with anyone else.”
“That’s funny,” Charlotte laughed, feeling sheepish, now. “Most people do it at parties. With people. To show off.”
“I went when I was camping,” Sean said. “I just longed to feel my legs and arms in the water without obstruction. It was glorious, really. And I didn’t have to worry about anyone seeing or judging my body.”
Charlotte wanted to interject, to tell him how wonderful she was sure he looked beneath his clothes. But she pushed it back. “I’ve never done it, I admit. My friends went once at a party at Yale, and I decided to go home and study. I didn’t want to get my hair wet.” She laughed at herself, hopeful that her truthfulness wasn’t putting him off.
“I would have done the same thing,” he said, shaking his head. “It’s almost like we had the same college experience.”
“Well I didn’t come out of it featured in a magazine,” Charlotte countered. “But…I suppose you’re right. I wish you would have been there for the lonely nights.” Had she really just said that to him? Had those words really come out of her mouth?
Sean looked at her, clearing his throat. He gestured toward the limousine, which they’d absent-mindedly walked back to. Beside them, the restaurant was closing for the night; people were sipping the last of their wines and going home, and servers were cleaning up.
“Are you ready to go home?” he asked her. His eyes were searching her face, trying to evaluate her feelings.
But Charlotte peered up at him with confidence. Bold words came cascading out of her mouth, then. “Why don’t we have a nightcap at your place?” she said, smiling.
And so, they hopped into the limousine, and Charlotte found herself grasping Sean’s hand. Her heart leaped into her throat, her every limb was tense, and her smile seemed glued to her face. The limousine drove them back to Seattle, where, she knew, what she’d formerly known of the world would come crashing down around her.
NINE
Sean’s penthouse was in the heart of downtown Seattle, near Pike’s Place Market, with an incredible view of the water. Stars dotted overhead, making the atmosphere even more romantic. Charlotte felt outside of her body as the limousine pulled to a stop outside the apartment block—the night, thus far, had been surreal, magical.
Sean turned toward her, oddly nervous—but he hadn’t asked her again, hadn’t inquired if this was the right thing, or not. They’d only held hands. They’d only implied their feelings for one another. Whatever happened in the penthouse apartment didn’t need to be sexual; it could be a conversation, followed by coffee—but in truth, that wasn’t what Charlotte was hoping for.
Sean helped her from the backseat of the limo, lacing his fingers through hers. Their hearts seemed to beat together, their pulses aligned. “We’ll take the elevator up,” he told her, his voice warm. “If you’re ready.”
The elevator was glass, floor to ceiling, and they soared up to the tenth floor, where Sean used a small silver key that brought the door open directly into the foyer of his penthouse.
Immediately, Charlotte felt a gasp escape her. She hadn’t meant to reveal h
er amazement at his wealth—especially given she’d told him, in no uncertain terms, that she was interested in him for him. But his penthouse suite was surely the height of luxury: the floors were marble, gleaming, almost as if they’d never been walked upon, and the foyer swept down a small staircase, into a cozy living room lined with leather couches. Up from the living room, a spiral staircase crept up to a kind of heavenly bedroom loft, where a king-sized bed splayed out, surrounded by crowded bookshelves.
“How many books do you have?” Charlotte asked, her voice full of wonder.
“You’re the first woman who’s ever asked me that,” Sean laughed. He gestured her toward the kitchen, where he found a bottle of fine whiskey in his liquor cabinet and poured them both generous splashes of the amber liquid. “Do you mind yours straight?” he asked.
Charlotte hadn’t drunk much whiskey straight—she hadn’t drunk much of it at all. But she had come too far to say no; this was a night for going out of her comfort zone. “I’ll have it straight, sure,” she said, her voice echoing in the vast kitchen.
Sean led her out into the living room and they sat on one of the plush leather sofas. He pressed a button on a remote, and soft indie music began to fold into her ears from the surrounding speakers. She felt she was in heaven on earth.
“I can’t believe you live like this,” Charlotte thought out loud. “And yet you still go camping.”
Sean laughed again. He placed his glass on the table before him, gazing into her eyes. “I’ve had a really wonderful time tonight.”
“Is this the part where you say you want to see me again?” Charlotte teased. “And I blink at you like a doll, telling you I really hope to see you again, too?”
“If we’re playing the roles of a ‘90s sitcom, I think you’re correct,” Sean said. “If only I’d met you for real in 2006. You were probably wearing…a jean skirt? Something from Abercrombie and Fitch.”
“They were the glory days of fashion,” Charlotte smiled. “I still remember what you wore; a suit that didn’t quite fit. Who helped you pick that out?”
Sean sighed, his eyebrows rising. “Actually, Evan did,” he shrugged. “He was always the stylish one. He had a knack for knowing what to wear to get girls to notice him, and what to wear around professors so they would take you seriously. But yeah—that suit. It was a bit too big. To be honest, I was so nervous before that speech, I lost about ten pounds in a month.” He snickered, shaking his head. “I ate way too much pizza before that, though.”
“Oh, yes. Freshman weight gain. I know it well,” Charlotte laughed. She felt such a familiarity with him, such warmth.
She leaned in towards him, sensing his lips so close to hers. And then, suddenly, as if in a dream, their lips locked together. She felt her body stir with pleasure as he wrapped his arms around her, as their kiss turned toward neediness, and lust.
But after a moment, Charlotte broke it, and looked away from him. She swept her fingers to her temples, shaking her head. “I’m sorry,” she whispered. “This is probably a terrible idea. I’m your lawyer. I have to respect the relationship we’ve set up between us, legally.”
Sean didn’t say anything. He brought his hand to her blond hair and swept his fingers through it, eyeing the way it caught in the light. The tension between them was at breaking point, even though they were hardly touching. Charlotte felt her chest rise high as she breathed jaggedly. She felt she would nearly explode with passion for him.
“I think we should give in to this,” he said then. The words weren’t obtrusive or pushy; they seemed natural, truthful. “This could be the one night we spend together. The one time we can truly fulfill this destiny.”
“The cufflink destiny,” she breathed.
“Exactly.”
They sealed his words with another kiss, and Charlotte wrapped her arms around his neck, pressing her breasts against his firm chest, feeling his muscles wrap around her. They melted into one another, then, lost in each other’s embrace.
Charlotte felt her fingers begin to unbutton his shirt; she felt herself stretch her arms forward, pushing his jacket from his shoulders to the floor. She played lightly with the black hair on his chest and felt the smoothness of his nipples. He ripped her blouse from her shoulders, bringing it up, over her head, and gazing at her lace bra, at the way her skin glowed beneath the soft lights.
“You are the woman from my dreams,” he said then.
They pressed their naked bodies together, teasing each other, before retiring to the bed upstairs. They made love deep into the night, entrapped in the other’s body, relishing in the feel of their skin touching, their unity. Then, they fell asleep in each other’s arms, completely content and utterly spent.
***
The following morning, Charlotte awoke in Sean’s arms, her cheek against his shoulder. She gazed at his nakedness before her, noting that they fit perfectly together, that their bodies seemed made for each other—they were two pieces of a stunning puzzle. And she longed for him not to wake up, so that this moment, this image, could last forever. She breathed easily, daydreaming, remembering herself as a eighteen-year-old girl once more. She wished she could go back and inform that girl of the beauty of the future.
“You’ll have a wonderful law career,” she would tell the girl, her voice warm. “And you’ll meet a man who will change everything, even though you can’t keep him. He cannot be yours. But the brevity of your time together doesn’t mean it isn’t important. Treasure your feelings. Listen to your heart. And fight for what you believe in, always.”
As Charlotte daydreamed, Sean stretched awake, turning his dark eyes toward her. He gave her that mischievous grin before reaching toward the floor and grasping the comforter. He swung it over them, so that they could no longer see their nakedness, so that they could drift apart on the mattress.
Charlotte felt oddly sad as they became two separate entities, but she didn’t allow it to show on her face. She gave him a friendly grin and felt a question bubble to her lips. “Do you want to eat breakfast? I’m starving.”
Sean laughed. He reached for his watch on the nightstand and checked it, noting the time. “I actually can’t, even though it’s Saturday; I have a meeting at noon. And it’s already 10:30? Oh, man.” He shrugged his shoulders. “I wish I could, though.” He kissed her lips lightly, without the tension of the evening before.
Charlotte lifted herself to a seated position, calculating how far away her home was. She needed to find her way back to the office, grab her bicycle, and ride hard and fast back to her place so that she could start to forget her feelings. “Well. This was fun, thank you,” she said. Her voice had the formality of a seasoned lawyer once again. She’d practiced this voice. And now, she kind of hated using it.
“Yes. Don’t think I’m not glad we did this, because I am. It was one of the best nights I’ve had in a long time,” Sean said. He turned away, grabbing a towel and moving towards the bathroom. He would no longer smell like her, soon.
“For the sake of your career and mine, we should definitely make this a one-time thing,” Charlotte said, hating how cold the words sounded after everything they’d shared the previous night.
She couldn’t read Sean’s reaction as he stepped into the bathroom and closed the door.
In that moment, Charlotte leaped from the bed and down the steps, toward the couch, where she found her pencil skirt and her lace shirt. She donned them quickly, pulling her fingers through her hair to try to look presentable again, not pausing to say goodbye before stabbing the elevator button.
She tipped her weight on first one heel, then the other, hoping Sean wouldn’t leave the bathroom before her escape. He was still in there when the elevator doors closed.
Outside, Charlotte marched toward her office building, still smelling of the billionaire. She could still taste his tongue in her mouth. Finding her trusty bike, she stabbed her feet over her pedals and bound herself toward home. In many ways, she wished she had just gone home the p
revious evening. Now, she’d have to live with this memory, just as she’d carried the memory of Sean throughout the previous ten years. Now, she had to know that, in another world, in another life, they might have been meant for each other. They could have been together.
But because she’d been able to meet him, because she’d been hired as his attorney, she was forced to remain alone.
Her apartment welcomed her without judgement. She fell into the arms of her couch and flicked around on the television, not bothering with the news or any of her normal channels of interest. She felt like a kid who’d been stood up at the dance, but she didn’t know why.
She was a grown adult, and she needed to refute her feelings for Sean. She would throw herself voraciously back into her work. Maybe, she thought, she’d make an online dating profile, to figure out if anyone in this world could ever compare to Sean.
She highly doubted it.
