Forever Yours

by Nicole Salmond

  “Stella, are you ok? Where are you?” She could hear the concern in his voice.

  “I happen to be having a fabulous time, without you.” She laughed, not able to control herself anymore. The anger she had felt was now shadowed by her drunkenness.

  “Are you drunk?” he questioned.

  “What’s it to you?” She giggled a little bit more.

  “Where are you?”

  “Club 42. What? You going to come partay? HA! Good luck with that. There’s no way Ben’s gonna let you go partying at a club. Wouldn’t be…how do you say it…press friendly?” Stella laughed.

  Tristan was silent.

  “Exactly what I thought. Bye Tristannnn,” Stella slurred as she hung up. She pushed the phone back into her clutch. Taking one last look at herself in the mirror, she pulled her fingers through her hair and wiped the eyeliner under her eye that had run from the spilt drink. Good enough, she thought.

  She made her way back through the crowd to the dance floor. She spotted Claire dancing with Dave, grinding her hips against him, their foreheads touching. She was looking at him in a way Stella had never seen before. Claire was in love.

  After that phone call, she was suddenly reminded of everything that had happened with Tristan. The last thing she wanted to do was be around Claire and Dave, drowning in their love for each other. She needed another drink.

  She turned to the bar, squeezing her way through as she bumped into people.

  After watching the barmen take orders it seemed they were completely ignoring her half of the bar. She was getting frustrated, her head was starting to spin.

  “Hello! I need a drink here! Oi!” she yelled out over the bar, pushing her body up over the bench top, waving her hand for attention.

  “You’re a feisty little one,” the guy next to her said. He was tall and well built, not as good as Tristan, but she didn’t want to think about Tristan right now.

  “You’ve got no idea.”

  “I’d like to find out,” he said eyeing her up and down.

  Was this guy serious? If she wasn’t so drunk she would have given this guy a mouthful, but she could hardly put two words together right now.

  “You wanna dance?” he asked when she hadn’t replied.

  “As you can see, I’m trying to get a drink.” She rolled her eyes at him.

  “And how’s that going for you?” he smirked.

  Stella sighed in defeat, she wasn’t about to get served anytime soon and she needing to keep moving, every time she stopped still too long the room started to spin.

  She grabbed the man by the shirt and pulled him onto the dance floor. “You better be a good dancer.”

  The man chuckled, “I’m good at a lot of things, especially dancing.”

  Stella rolled her eyes again, arrogant and cocky, great!

  They found the middle of the dance floor shortly after their push through the crowd. She decided to take her dance moves up a notch as she copied some of her sister’s moves and tried them out. She hadn’t danced this slutty in a long time. Stella caught Claire’s glance when she wrapped her arms around the guy’s neck, grinding her hips back and forth on him. Claire’s faced hardened and she mouthed, “What the hell?”

  Stella waved her hand, dismissing the comment. Claire frowned at her, as she pulled Dave off her, clearly upset with Stella. She stepped towards Stella, but suddenly stopped, her eyes staring at the back of the club. Stella slowed her movements as she watched the people around her also stopping. Her arms still wrapped around the guy’s shoulders, her eyes followed the crowd’s direction.

  Standing on the steps above the dance floor near the entrance was Tristan surrounded by security guards, his eyes fixed on Stella. She dropped her arms immediately and took a step forward, making distance between the guy she was dancing with and her. He obviously recognised Tristan as well. Was she the only one who didn’t know who he was? she thought as the guy next to her reached his phone out of his pocket and started taking pictures of him, along with the rest of the club. All of a sudden flashing lights came from all directions as people took pictures of him.

  Stella could feel her legs going weak. The sight of him made her heart race. He was still dressed in the outfit he had on at the interview. She could no longer hear the music, all she could see was Tristan’s eyes on her as he strode across the floor, not making eye contact with anyone else, the security clearing a path before him.

  As he approached her, Stella tried to say something, “Tristan I-” He grabbed her head in his hands and kissed her, claiming her in front of everyone. All previous anger and resentment towards him vanished at his touch. She closed her hands over the top of his as he kissed her harder.

  Her head spinning as her eyes closed. She couldn’t control herself anymore, her body gave way and she felt herself fall, breaking their kiss. Tristan grabbed her by the waist quickly and picked her up into his arms. She opened her eyes, peering up at him. “Tristan…” Before she could finish her sentence she felt the darkness claim her as she passed out.

  ***

  Tristan watched as Stella woke from her sleep. He had spent half the night looking after her while she was sick in the bathroom. He hadn’t had any sleep, afraid she would choke on her own vomit, or she would realise where she was and leave him again.

  He was angry at her, furious she had let herself go like that. He had gone against everything he knew and gone to the club last night looking for her. He had spent the last three years, with the help of Ben, keeping out of negative media. They had both worked together to make sure the only news that came out about himself was positive and helped him with his music career.

  Ben was livid when Tristan told him what he was doing, and even more mad when Tristan kissed Stella on the dance floor and she passed out in his arms. As a result of Tristan’s actions, Ben had spent most of the night with his PR team trying to spin the story so it didn’t look as bad as what it was. Unfortunately both Tristan and Ben knew there was no way they could put a band-aid on what had happened.

  Stella let out a deep groan. “Am I dead?”

  “No fortunately not,” Tristan replied.

  “You mean unfortunately.”

  “I’m just glad you’re ok Stella.” Tristan watched as Stella brushed the hairs from her face, pulling herself up on the bed. She had been sick all over her dress last night so Tristan had changed her into one of his shirts.

  She looked sympathetically at Tristan. “Is it bad Tristan?”

  “Is what bad?” Tristan tried to act naïve to her question.

  Stella cocked her head to the side, letting out a deep sigh. “I’m sorry Tristan. I know what um… implications last night would have had on you. I was just so mad at you, I’m still mad. Drinking seemed the only way to forget it all. Forget you. ”

  Tristan winced at her reply. He didn’t want to believe their relationship was over and was so mad that Stella had wanted to throw it all away over a miscommunication. But as soon as he saw her dancing with that guy on the dance floor, he knew he couldn’t just stand by and watch Stella be taken advantage of. She was his and he was willing to let the whole world know it.

  Then he had to look after her, and she’d told him it didn’t change anything, what happened didn’t change the fact they were over. Seeing Stella in the state she was in and knowing he had been the reason why she had done that made him feel guilty, protective, and hurt. But nothing pained him more than when she reminded him they were over. He could only hope when she woke up sober she’d forgotten it.

  He didn’t want Stella to ever feel like she had to go to those lengths again, especially because of him.

  “I can’t say you put me in the best situation, especially after seeing you with that guy on the dance floor,” he said as Stella bowed her head. “But I realised I was the reason why you were there in the first place.”

  “It still doesn’t excuse my behaviour.” She swallowed. “I can’t even remember the last time I drank more than a couple
of drinks. I’m suddenly remembering why I don’t do it.”

  “I remembered you told me you didn’t drink.”

  She nodded. “So how bad is it?”

  Tristan spoke honestly, “Pretty bad.” He wasn’t about the make the same mistake again hiding anything from her.

  “Shit. Mum’s going to kill me,” she grunted.

  “I think your mum is going to be the least of your problems.”

  “That bad?”

  The scared look on her face made him shudder. “Ben’s been up all night on damage control, but I don’t think it will change anything.”

  ‘Show me.”

  “Do you really want to know?” He didn’t want to show her, didn’t want her to see how bad the media could get. He’d never wanted her to see this side of his life.

  She shrugged in defeat. “No point trying to ignore it.”

  Tristan pulled himself up off the couch. Grabbing the remote from the chest of drawers and clicked the wall mounted TV on.

  Tristan watched Stella as she took in the news headlines. Her face went from curiosity to complete shock. ‘Singer’s girlfriend’s drunken night out’, ‘Famous singer to girlfriend’s rescue’, and ‘Embarrassing scene for Aussie heartthrob’ were just a few of the many headlines about last night events. The story was covering every morning show, pictures and video footage of Stella and Tristan’s kiss and her passing out in his arms kept replaying over and over, along with fellow club goers recounts of Stella’s behaviour from that night, and the moment Tristan ‘saved her’.

  Stella buried her hands in her face. Tristan turned off the TV and walked over to Stella, hearing her sobbing.

  “Hey Stella, its ok.” Tristan hugged Stella, her tears getting louder. “Please don’t cry. I’m sorry. I shouldn’t have made a scene.”

  Stella came up for a breath facing Tristan. “I shouldn’t have reacted like that. I shouldn’t have gone out and got drunk like that. Now everyone is going to see me…” she gulped. “In that state.” She sobbed harder into Tristan’s shoulder. He hated hearing her cry, it was like a knife to the heart.

  “Stella what’s done is done. There’s nothing we can do about it now.”

  “But you don’t get it Tristan. Everyone will see me. I just got a freakin job offer with a reputable accounting firm. What the hell do you think they are going to think when they see me all over the news drunk and passing out?”

  “Are you taking the job offer?” Tristan sounded disappointed. He had hoped she would change her mind, hoping she would come with him.

  “Are you serious Tristan? After last night! And now this!” She waved to the TV. “How could I possibly fit into your world? One night with you and my life is ruined, not to mention the damage I’ve done to your career.”

  “You didn’t ruin it,” Tristan said trying to reassure her. “People will forget about it Stella, don’t worry. Tomorrow there will be some other famous person doing something more newsworthy.”

  “You just don’t get it do you Tristan?” Her voice pleaded with him, “I didn’t ask for this. I was quite happy with my boring life. I never had to worry about people watching me, following me, waiting for me to make a mistake, analysing everything I do, trying to make a news story out of it.”

  “I know Stella but-”

  “No Tristan. No buts. This isn’t a life, how could anyone live happily like this? My family is going to freak out. I doubt they’ll want me anymore for the accounting position, now I’ll always be known as ‘that drunk girl’.” She jumped out of bed. “How could you do this to me Tristan? I never, NEVER let anyone get close! I made a promise to never let anyone get to me like that. To never fall in love again…and then some stupid famous singer comes along and I forget everything I ever stood for,” she choked, her tears falling freely down her face. “This is why I don’t date. This is why I don’t fall in love, it always ends in heartbreak.”

  “Stel, I’m sorry, for everything. Believe me I wish you didn’t have to endure this. I’m sorry. But this is my life. It’s not all like this Stella, there is good from it.” He wanted to take her away from it all, away from all the pain she’d ever been through. He couldn’t bear to see her like this. “I’ll cancel the tour. I’ll stay here with you, please.”

  “No Tristan, don’t. Please don’t cancel it for me. I don’t want you to. You need to do this, I understand, but I can’t do it with you.”

  “But if I don’t go, then we can be together.”

  “It doesn’t matter Tristan, you not going to Europe isn’t going to change anything, it won’t change us. What’s done is done.” Stella grabbed her purse off the chest of draws, picking up her heels. “I want to go home Tristan.”

  “Can we at least talk about this?” He didn’t want this to be the end, the end of the best thing that had ever happened to him.

  “I think we’ve said enough. Now please, let me go home.” Her eyes pleaded with Tristan to listen to her.

  “What can I do to make you stay?” He couldn’t just let her go, let her walk away and be done with him, with their relationship.

  Stella hugged her clutch and heels close to her body, tears streaming down her face. “Nothing Tristan. How did we possibly ever think this could work. You and me. It was destined for heartbreak before it even began. Now please Tristan, just let me go.”

  Tristan felt a tear graze his cheek. “But I love you Stella.”

  Stella choked back tears. “Sometimes love isn’t enough.” And with Stella’s final words she turned and walked out of the room. Tristan stood there motionless. He could feel his heart breaking. He had never loved anyone the way he had loved Stella, and because of his career, his ‘dream’ he had lost the only person he truly cared about.

  CHAPTER TEN

  Stella woke to the pounding sound on their unit door. She quickly scrambled to her feet, glancing at the clock on her bedside table. 3:12am.

  She hurried down the hallway, still hearing the deafening sounds against their door.

  “Stella!” Stella paused as her hand held the door handle. It was Tristan. She had spent the last three days not responding to his phone calls and text messages. He had tried to visit her at their unit a few times but Stella had Claire turn him away. Now he was here again, and she felt her heart race at the sound of his voice. She wanted to forgive and forget, go back to the way they were, but she couldn’t.

  “Stella! Please talk to me, please!” Tristan yelled on the other side of the door.

  “There’s nothing left to talk about.” Stella held back tears as she spoke through the door.

  “You’re there! Stella, please! Talk to me! Open the door!”

  Stella hesitated, not sure whether she could face him. It was easier to stand strong when he wasn’t face to face with her. She didn’t trust herself with him, she knew she could easily cave, forgetting and forgiving him with his words and touch.

  She quietly turned the door knob, bracing herself for what lay before her.

  Tristan stood there with his head buried into his chest, dripping wet from the heavy rain. His head jolted upright to meet Stella’s eyes when he saw the door open, his eyes spoke of sadness and burden.

  “Stella,” Tristan whispered as he grabbed her waist and pulled her forward.

  Stella could smell his alcohol stained breath as he spoke. “No Tristan. Get off me.” She pushed Tristan’s arms away, he fought to try and keep their embrace. “Tristan! I mean it. Off!” She gave him a harder push, this time his hands released her.

  “I’m sorry Stella. Please forgive me. I didn’t mean for all this to happen. I should have told you about Europe, I shouldn’t have kissed you like that at the club and made a scene.”

  “It’s not just about that Tristan. It’s everything. It’s this crazy world you live in. How are we meant to have a real relationship? You’re Tristan Woods for Christ’s sake!”

  “I’ll change Stella. I’ll make it better. Please just give me a chance.”

  “Y
ou’ve had your chance Tristan. It’s over.”

  “Don’t say that Stella. You don’t mean it.” He grabbed her again, pulling her close.

  “No Tristan. Stop it! You’re clearly drunk.”

  “I’ve only had a couple. I’m miserable without you Stel.” His eyes pleaded with her.

  Stella swatted his hands away. “Don’t you think I’m miserable Tristan?” She couldn’t hold back her tears any longer. “I let you in. I let myself believe we had something. I never wanted to feel like this again. Yet you came along and everything changed. I fell in love with you Tristan, and you lied to me. There is a reason why I don’t let people in, so I don’t feel like this.” Stella’s tears flowed down her face. Tristan touched his palm to her face, wiping her tears.

  “I’m sorry,” he whispered.

  She pushed his hand away. “I need you to leave Tristan.”

  “Stella, don’t. Please don’t push me away.” He took a step forward, she responded by stepping herself backwards further into her unit.

  “Leave now Tristan. It’s easier this way,” she pleaded, she didn’t want him to hurt anymore, she didn’t want to hurt.

  “I’m not leaving,” His voice dry and coarse, she could see tears forming in his eyes.

  “Please Tristan. Go!” Stella cried.

  “I think you should leave Tristan.” Claire’s voice came from behind her. Stella turned to Claire and ran to her bedroom, pausing at the doorway as she listened to Claire’s voice.

  “I’m sorry Tristan. But if she wants you to leave, then I think its best you go,” Claire calmly spoke to Tristan.

  “Why is she doing this? I didn’t mean it, I didn’t mean anything. I just love her so much. I’ve never felt like this with anyone before. I know what happened was bad, but I didn’t think we would break up over it. What’s happening Claire? I don’t understand.” Stella could hear his voice choking, she knew he must be crying.

  “I wish I could explain it to you Tristan, I really do. But if Stella hasn’t told you then it’s not my place to say anything.”