Wolf_A Filthy Sweet Fairy Tale Romance
Page 9
I step into the elevator already waiting for me with heartfelt appreciation for the multiple car system. The door closes as I see Ruby's grandmother running out of the apartment after me.
Just in time.
As the elevator moves, I try to take deep breaths. No matter what else happens, I need to control the wolf. It thrashes inside me, howling in despair at having lost Ruby. Sweat breaks out on my forehead as I try to manage it.
At the same time, I feel the urge to throw myself into every indulgence, drown myself, bury myself in every vice to forget her. Fill my life with everything I just expelled from it.
It isn't Ruby.
But it would be something to fill this blankness, this emptiness.
Even as I think it, consider it, I know I won't do it. I was right when I told Ruby she'd changed me. Irrevocably, it seems.
As I walk out of the building, I make a vow to myself.I am going to be the person Ruby deserves. Whether or not she wants me in her life, I am going to continue to try to be the better man I've been trying to become.
The vow steadies me, gives me an anchor to hold on to once more. I get a firm grip on my control, taking deep breaths as I walk away.
I can't go back. I can't slide back into the skin that I didn't want Ruby to see. It isn't happening.
Maybe I can't make her happy. Maybe this is it and I won't have her in my life again. Never have her in my arms again. But I can do this much.
I can be the man she should have.
She's left her indelible mark on me, an undeniable desire to rise above where I have been. To be the best version of myself. And the best version of myself can also do something else.
I can make sure Ruby never has to be under her grandmother's thumb again. That woman is a bitter, controlling boil on the hide of society. I don't want Ruby to ever have to deal with her again. She should get the opportunities she deserves without having to change, to stifle who she really is.
I'll make sure she receives those opportunities.
I go back to my building and make plans as I reach my floor, feeling purpose fuel me even as my heart aches in my chest. The first thing I do when I'm home is use my HUD to bring up the files I have on Ruby's parents. I looked them up in preparation for facing her again. It may be an invasion of privacy, but I needed every edge I could possibly have.
Not that it made any difference in the end.
I shake off that thought.
In those files I obtained, I found that her parents are in a terrible place financially. And I can fix that. I want to fix that for Ruby. But I need to be careful so they don't realize it's from me. It has to make logical sense. I can't just give them money.
Hmm.
Ruby's father is an artist.
I consider that as I sit down, tapping the armrest of the plush armchair I like to think in. Opening his portfolio, I skim through his work. Not bad. Pretty good, actually.
Art is a world where fortunes are fickle. If he'd gotten one of the right patrons, he could have been making an amazing amount of money by this point in his life. I've seen less talented artists than him command ridiculous prices for their over hyped wares. I know a little about that world. I've dabbled in galleries, not seriously, but enough that I have contacts.
Contacts that could perhaps use an artist of his caliber.
I make a phone call.
"Hello, Eugenia. Yes, I was wondering…"
I send her his portfolio. She seems interested.
I hang up the phone. First thing down.
I feel a renewed sense of purpose as I make moves to help Ruby. Something to hold on to even though the future seems bleak without her.
As the days pass, I keep tabs on her. She goes back to her parents and starts applying for colleges. I quietly arrange for her to receive a scholarship, one I set up for her. She may have received one of the many she applied for, but I want to ensure she doesn't have to worry at all about paying for school.
She gets into college. A good one, based on her own ability, her own merit. I feel proud even as I wish I could congratulate her in person. Instead, I send flowers anonymously and try to keep myself busy with work, filling in the holes created by pulling out of the shadier dealings I’d been a part of before Ruby.
It keeps me occupied. But work doesn't keep me fulfilled. It just provides a distraction, a much needed one. But still, not any kind of emotional fulfillment.
I now realize that all of my risky behavior before had all been an attempt to fill that same void. Fill it with artificial highs, adrenaline rushes, physical pleasure. But it hadn't been working even before Ruby.
Not really.
I'd always been chasing a better high, always been looking for more. Good thing I'm done with it. Now, I shove as much into my day as I can, hoping to exhaust myself into a good night's sleep. It is only partially effective. I still toss and turn, knowing something is missing.
Someone.
But I continue to exist, to do my best.
Weeks after that fateful day at Ruby's Grandmother's, I come home after a grueling day. Home to the empty apartment that I try to stay away from as much as possible. It's a constant reminder that I'm alone.
Not bothering to change, I simply take off my coat and loosen my tie before taking a seat on the couch. Sighing, I lean my head back and close my eyes. Another empty day. Going into another long night.
Alone.
Maybe I should let myself wallow a little. Just for tonight.
My eyes pop open as the distinct bell of someone arriving sounds through the place. Who could be dropping by unannounced right now? Don't they know I have a bout of wallowing scheduled?
"Who is it?" I ask the system, completely disinterested. Maybe they'll just go away and I won't have to deal with anyone.
A holographic image streams into place in front of me. My heart almost stops as I stare at the picture in front of me.
Ruby.
It's Ruby.
I stand as I take her in, take in every detail of her appearance. Long, dark red hair, that hooded red coat, ripped jeans, sneakers on her feet. So real.
She looks around a little nervously.
Ruby.
"Let her in," I say hoarsely.
I turn and rush to the door, waiting impatiently for the elevator to bring her up. It takes less than a minute, but it feels like I stand there for an eternity.
When the doors open and she steps out, I take a step towards her, still not quite believing she's here.
But she is.
"Why are you here?" I ask, needing to know. I can't pretend to make small talk.
She closes the distance between us slowly, stopping a pace away. "Zane," she says softly, searching my face. She's just as beautiful as ever. Her skin glows with health. "I… I came to apologize."
I blink at her, frowning, my thoughts completely derailing. "Apologize?" I repeat, not sure I heard her correctly.
She nods, stepping even closer, until I could reach out and touch her.
My hands fist at my sides.
Careful. She may not want me to touch her.
An apology is just that.
"Yes. It took some time for me to calm down, but when I did… I realized I wasn't being fair to you. You never really got a chance to tell me the truth." She shrugs, shoving her hands in her pockets as she meets my eyes directly. "I'm sorry for not giving you that chance. I should have."
I can't believe she would think she needs to apologize. "It's okay. I understood," I say even as I want to just grab her, kiss her.
But she's just apologizing. She doesn't want anything more. I have to remember that.
She shakes her head, a small smile appearing on those full lips. "You're making me feel even worse," she murmurs, moving slightly closer again, until I can smell her, feel the heat radiating from her body. This is torture. A kind I'll gladly take forever. "Zane." She licks her lips and my eyes follow the movement, transfixed. "I want to say more."
I nod.
<
br /> "Alright," I murmur. I'll let her speak all night if she wants, if it will keep her here.
She chuckles a little, looking away, but only for a moment.
"Zane," she says, her eyes so sincere as they meet mine again my heart aches. "That night we spent together was the best night of my life." I hold my breath, unable to believe my ears. Too afraid to let hope seep in again. But she keeps going. "Imagining going through the rest of it without you… it's breaking my heart." She takes a deep breath. "Zane. I love you."
Even before the words are fully out of her mouth, I have her up in my arms.
And my mouth on hers.
I turn around, carrying her inside even as I kiss her desperately, still unable to fully accept that she's in my arms again.
That she's real.
That she wants to be with me.
That she loves me.
How did I get so lucky?
But even as she wraps her legs around me and kisses me back, as I get drunk on the flavor of her, the scent of her, I make another vow. I vow that she'll never regret this decision. That I'll be the man she needs me to be for the rest of our lives together. The rest of our lives.
Together.
The thought of it makes my heart swell. Ruby is my weakness, but she's also my strength. Suddenly my whole life feels full to bursting with her in my arms, the years ahead filled with possibilities.
With happiness.
I have everything I'll ever need, right here in my arms. And I'm never losing her again.
Chapter 17
Ruby
I moan as I wrap my legs around Zane's waist.
Despite my determination not to, I've been thinking about him ever since I ran out of Grandmother's place without a backwards glance. Even with everything that's happened, I just couldn't let go of him.
My heart wouldn't let me.
Dad got a better job so my parents are actually in a good place financially. They even moved into a much better apartment. And I got a scholarship to go to a good university. One even Grandmother wouldn't look down her nose at.
School is good. My grades are good.
Boys have hit on me, but I don't feel any interest. Not even a little. And something still felt missing in my life. A void that ached.
I've been ignoring the fact that I know exactly what's missing, hoping it will go away. But it hasn’t. It persisted, prodding at me, whispering at me. It wouldn't let me go.
I finally had to confront it, confront why I wasn't happy. With a cool head, I rethought everything that happened between us.
Yes, Zane wasn't honest. The fact that he was my first only amplified the sense of betrayal, the feeling of my vulnerability being exploited. And then finding out that there was another layer to the deception, that he wasn't even human but Singarti…
It was too much for me to process all at once at the time.
But that isn't the whole picture. No matter how much I tried to make it be.
He came to see me at Grandmother's to be honest. To lay everything out. To try to reconnect, fix what was wrong. But I'd been too hurt to accept it. Too raw to give him, us, another chance. And I paid the price.
Long, lonely nights.
The desire to hear his voice, see his smile. Hear him say something in that low tone, the wicked glint in his eye.
I slide my fingers into his hair as I kiss him, wanting more. Wanting everything. This is what's been missing. This is what's been nagging at me.
He pulls back, his hair mussed, lips swollen from that so necessary kiss. "I love you too," he says, his eyes scanning my face, like he's memorizing it. Like he still can't quite believe I'm there. I should have come weeks ago.
I smile, kissing him gently as the words run through me in a warm wave.
He loves me.
"That's great," I murmur. "But maybe you could show me instead of telling me," I tease against his lips.
He grins. "Ask and you shall receive," he says, his voice already husky.
Our clothes are off so quickly I have no idea where they went. And I don't care, not with his naked body in front of me.
"Come on," he says, taking my hand and leading me to his bedroom. It's just as modern and gorgeous as what I've seen so far. Clean lines, dark neutral colors, heavily cushioned furniture. It's definitely a bachelor pad. A very rich bachelor's pad.
"I'm sorry I didn't make your first time more special," he says as we stop in front of his massive bed, the clean white sheets and pillows inviting.
I look into his eyes and can see the regret he's voicing. I can feel it emanating from him. It's so unnecessary.
I shake my head, cupping his face. "I don't regret it at all," I whisper. "Well. Maybe your friend walking in on us I could have done without."
He chuckles, shaking his head. "He's not my friend anymore."
Oh. "Really?"
"We don't see eye to eye on things now," he says as he guides me down onto the bed. "But that doesn't matter right now." He comes down on top of me, his body hot and hard. Including one very particular part. "I only want to think about you."
I shake my head, determined not to cry. He's done so much to try to win me back. I don't suspect for a second that he's being insincere.
I want the physical, want to feel reconnected in that way. I reach down and take a hold of his thick erection, my eyes widening at how big it really is. I thought maybe I was remembering wrong. But before I can explore more, he pulls away.
"I want to make you feel good," he murmurs as he kisses my face, my neck, the upper slopes of my breasts. "And the show will be over too fast if you do too much of that."
I want to argue, but then his mouth is on my tight nipples, sucking, nibbling, his hands smoothing down my sides. I sigh, letting the sensations wash over me. I missed this. Missed him.
He leaves my breasts, shaping them with his hands before moving down, kissing my stomach. But he doesn't go where I want him. Where I need him.
At least right away.
He moves to the side, kisses down one leg. And then the other. He lays a gentle kiss on the arch of one foot, and then the other.
"Zane," I complain, shifting impatiently.
He chuckles, finally moving up where I really need him. "You're the most beautiful thing I've ever seen," he murmurs, his eyes meeting mine as his head lowers.
My heart immediately melts. But then his mouth is on me, his tongue lapping at my clitoris softly. My body melts too. At this rate, I'll just be a puddle, and I'm totally okay with that.
I close my eyes, sinking into the softness of the bed. Oh, yes. He's going slowly, almost delicately. The pleasure almost laps at me, building just as slowly as he's going. But it's rising, even at that pace. One slow lick after another.
I'm damp with sweat as I push my hips up against his mouth minutes later, needing more, needing something. He presses my hips back down with a forearm over across me, pushing me back down, holding me there.
And then sucks on me.
Hard.
I cry out, arching as the orgasm flows through me, deep and long because of the buildup. It flows through every inch of me, until my whole body tingles with it. Zane follows me through it, holding me down for his mouth, forcing me to ride it.
Finally, I come back down with a sigh, trying to catch my breath as Zane kisses me gently, sitting up. I open my eyes, seeing his flushed face, his glittering eyes. My own track down his chest with the tight points of his nipples, his abs, tensed. Right down to his erection, already dripping with his excitement.
I sit up and reach for it, determined. He doesn't stop me this time as I wrap my hand around him, squeezing gently.
"Lie down," I say, pushing him back on the bed.
He lets me, watching as I bend over him. I slowly lick up his length. He groans, his body flexing.
Mmm.
I lick him some more, cupping his testicles, exploring. I want him to feel as good as I do.
I take the tip of him in my mouth, licking
, swirling my tongue, trying to mimic how he'd used his on me. And all hell breaks loose.
A growl and then I'm suddenly on my back with my legs over Zane's shoulders, his face tight as he guides his erection to me with a hand at his base. Then he's sliding in, both of us groaning at the tight fit.
"Zane," I gasp, arching up into him at the intensity of it.
"I need to be inside you," he mutters.
He moves slowly, steady thrusts that eventually have him bottoming out inside me. I pant, feeling so full, like I could never be empty again.
"Okay?" he asks, smoothing his hands down my legs, kissing my ankle softly.
I nod. "More."
"Hmm."
He starts thrusting, slow and steady, his body moving like a machine, his muscles clenching and rippling with each movement. I could watch him move like that forever.
He bends over, my legs sliding to either side of him as he leans down to kiss me. It's soft, gentle, just like his body in mine.
I break the kiss to suck in some air and he stays there, his forehead braced against mine as his body moves inside me.
And it feels amazing.
Perfect.
I slide my hands over his damp back, thrusting in time with him. It's even better than before. I can see in his eyes how much he loves me. In the care he takes with my body. He lets me see it, leaves himself completely vulnerable to me.
Even after I hurt him, rejected him so harshly. I'll never hurt him like that again. His openness is a gift I won't take for granted.
Our pace is slow and we take our time, savoring the moment. Savoring being together again. But the inexorable slide to orgasm can't wait forever.
I make a sound in the back of my throat, needing a release again. Zane pulls out of me and I look at him questioningly.
"Turn over," he orders, helping me onto my hands and knees. And then his body is covering mine again, and he's pushing back in, deeper and more overwhelming than before.
I throw my head back on a gasp as he reaches under me and starts to rub my clitoris. Not slow and soft anymore, but fast and purposeful as he picks up his thrusts.
Sweat drips onto my back and I try to muffle my groans as he drives me up fast and hard now. And it's just as perfect.