by Khan, Jen
“Dinner?” I repeat.
His eyes lift to me and he winks. “One carne adovada and a chicken taquito.”
I walk to the living room, round the coffee table, and plop on the couch next to him. I look down at the food spread on the table. “I thought you had to work tonight,” I say tearing open my carne adovada.
He studies me for a second, takes a pull of his beer, and shakes his head. “Juice needed the shift. He rambled on and on about his new money pit of a car, so I gave it up to him.”
“Oh. So that means I get dinner?”
Braden nods. “That means you get dinner and some company.”
“Braden…“ I start, turning my head away. “We have to talk.”
“Yeah, you’re right. We need to talk,” he says reaching out, his thumb stroking my cheek, and my body tenses.
I knew it was coming. The disappointment from trying to get involved with me again now that so much has happened. Now that I’m this mess that he obviously saw the other night. I couldn’t dodge him forever. He is reconsidering his feelings for me. He saw how screwed up I actually am now and he’s ready to hightail it out before shit gets too deep. Who could blame him really?
“Let’s talk.” I stand up. To go where, I have no clue.
I think I make it all of two steps before he clips me around the waist and drags me back to his body. I slam into the wall of his chest and immediately there is a warmth emitting from his body.
I look back and up to meet his eyes and open my mouth to speak but he beats me to it.
“We need to discuss where we are in this relationship,” he says close to my ear.
He turns me so that I am facing him. I slowly blink, trying to process whatever is going on here. His eyes roam my face and his hands tighten on my shoulders.
“Okay,” I whisper back.
“I know that you’re scared out of your mind with what’s going on here. I told you I wasn’t going to be pushed away again. You told me some crazy shit the other night, how you broke up with me to protect me from the life that your father imposed on you. I get that, but, Em? Things are going to go differently this time.”
I stare at him with my mouth open. What is he talking about? He should be running in the other direction.
“This”—he points his finger between the two of us—“is the real deal. We’re going to see this through this time. You think you can walk out of my life like you did months ago? After what happened between us the other night? Yeah, that’s not going to happen again. If you’re thinking of giving me my walking papers already, save your breath. I’m not going anywhere.”
“The other night—“
“Was amazing and I won’t let that crazy head of yours turn it to shit,” he interrupts.
“But—“
“Don’t mistake me for just some fucking guy,” he gripes.
My stomach drops and I whisper, “But I thought you were going to be done with me once you saw me freak.”
His eyebrows draw together and his face twists. “I can’t believe that you would think that fucking low of me after everything. After I took care of you and got you the job, and after the other night—what we shared at dinner. Jesus, Em, get your head out of your ass!”
I quickly pipe up, “No, that’s not it!”
“How is it then?”
“Things were good with us.”
“Yeah.”
“And things got all screwed up.”
“So?”
I drop my head. “I don’t know.”
Branden lifts my chin with his finger, tilting my head up to look at him. “I know that the other night we reconnected. You and I found our way back to each other. I know you’re still working this shit out that happened to you. Your life hasn’t been easy and yet here you are—“
“Shut up, Braden.” My eyes slide away to look at the wall.
“I can’t do that, baby. Look at me.”
My gaze moves back to him. “I know you think you are defeated, but you’re not. I saw you at your worst. Do you wanna know what I see when I look at you?”
Oh God.
“You’re the most beautiful woman I’ve ever laid eyes on.”
I try to turn my head, but he cups my cheek to stop me.
“I see a beautiful woman who was dealt a shitty hand, stared down evil, told it to fuck off, and rose from hell. You have to see that.” He brings his mouth to my forehead and whispers, “You have to see that. Only then will you come out of this hell that you keep reliving over and over.”
My breath hitches. I close my eyes and bringing my arms around his neck.
“You feel me, baby?”
All I can do is nod.
He caresses my back, giving me a moment to take in all he just laid out for me, and cinches his fingers into my hair.
My mind is reeling with so many questions. How can he possibly see all of this in me when I can’t see it myself? How can he think I am strong enough to overcome all of this when I’m breaking down on the inside? Sure, it’s gotten easier over the past few months, but still.
He turns me so that my back is pressed to his front slides me off his lap to the seat next to him. He reaches over the table, bringing the glass of wine to me. “Em, drink your wine and eat your carne adovada.”
“Fine,” I sigh. “So bossy.”
He shakes his head again and smiles.
I drink a sip of wine before setting it on the table. I grab my food and a plastic fork and shovel a bite in.
“Tristan tells me you’re taking more classes with him. He also tells me that you’re gettin’ pretty good.”
I nod my head and swallow. “I think I’m learning a lot. I flipped him over my shoulder earlier today.”
Braden’s eyes shoot up. “My baby’s a little badass, huh?” He leans in and nudges me with his elbow.
A giggle escapes me. A freaking giggle. Oh God! I take another sip of wine.
“So there’s a great band playing Saturday night at Holts. I know you don’t have to work, so I was hoping you’d come. Bring Olivia and Holly. Make it a ladies’ night kinda thing.”
I haven’t seen a decent band play around here—ever. Hell, most of the bands that are any good play in bars in Spartanburg or Greenville, not Tryon.
“Have I heard of them?”
Braden smiles as if he is letting me in on a little secret. “Crossfade.”
My eyes practically bug out of my head. Did he just say Crossfade? They are only one of my favorite bands. No freaking way. I put my plate on the table, dropping my fork on my plate.
“No freaking way!”
He smiles again. “Yes freaking way. Les the lead—“
“Guitarist! I know who Les is!” My God, I am damn near panting.
“Anyhow, he’s an old buddy of mine. They have a concert in Charlotte and planned to stick around for a couple of days. Back in the day, before they made it big, I was able to hook them up with some gigs at a few venues that I have connections with, so when I asked if they’d play at Holts, they were more than happy to do it.”
Oh my God! I think I’m going to hyperventilate. And that’s exactly what I tell him.
“Oh my God! I think I’m going to hyperventilate.”
Braden releases a deep chuckle and squeezes my knee.
“Why didn’t you ever tell me that you knew Crossfade?” I ask.
He shrugs a shoulder. “First, it never came up, and second, I don’t know Crossfade. I know Les.”
Les is hot.
“Les is hot,” I whisper and smack both of my hands over my mouth and look down to my feet. I have a serious case of diarrhea of the mouth tonight.
Braden tilts my head back with a finger to my chin so my eyes meet his. “Does that mean you’ll come?”
“Of course I’ll be there!” I squeal. Again, I cover my mouth with my hands and nodd my head affirmatively to him.
Braden lets out a low laugh. “Good.”
I reach for his food and beer one at a
time placing them on the coffee table.
He puts his arms around my waist and I climb onto his lap, resting my head against his neck.
“I know I’m a little screwy right now,” I whisper into his ear. “But give me a little time. Okay?”
He leans back, bringing his eyes to mine. “You have all the time in the world. Whatever you need, you got it. Don’t worry about me, but stop trying to keep your distance. Doesn’t work for me.”
My eyes scan his face. “I’ve been distant the past few days. You don’t deserve that.”
“I tried to give you a little space when I felt you withdrawing, but I’m not going to be able to do that anymore,” Braden states. “We’ve been apart too long as it is. I’m not spending another day without you in it.”
I rest my forehead to his and take in a deep breath.
He slouches back into the couch, taking me with him, my head settling on his shoulder. One of his arms rubs one of my arms and the hand of the other cups the back of my neck, giving me a sweet, relaxing message.
The locks jiggle and the front door opens. Our heads turn to see Holly entering the apartment, still wearing her white ruffled blouse that shows off a hint of cleavage and a navy blue pencil skirt with white strappy slingback heels. The look works for her. She is a total babe in anything she wears, but this look? She rocks it. Her long, straight, thick brown hair has new blond highlights through it, which work well with her light complexion and light brown eyes.
She glances at us, her expression becoming soft. “This,” she says, pointing and waving her finger between Braden and me. “I like this shit.” She winks and heads back to her room. “Love you, Emma. Night, Braden!” she hollers back at us.
I roll my eyes and let out a little giggle.
Screw it. I’ve taken on giggling.
“I like it,” Braden whispers.
I turn my head to him, my eyes looking to his. “What do you like?”
“Listening to you laugh. Seeing you smile. I like it.”
“Me too.”
And I do. And it is because of him.
Chapter Fourteen
The bar is alive tonight, packed wall to wall with people. Crossfade can really sell out a joint. They are that good.
It didn’t take much convincing to round up Holly and Olivia. They are huge fans of the band too. As soon as I informed Holly of our Saturday night plans, she screamed so loud that I swear she pierced an eardrum.
So here we are, hanging out at Holts, waiting for one of our favorite bands to take the stage. All three of us decided on big hair tonight. Even with Olivia’s short pixie cut hair, highlighted with hot pink and blue, she was able to add height.
I settled on skinny jeans, black knee-high boots, and a black tank top with a glittery, girly skull embroidered on the front. When you go to a rock concert, you have to dress rock and roll. I added a black choker and silver hoop earrings.
Holly and Olivia both decided to rock their little black dresses. Both of them found the same little black dress at the mall today while shopping for the perfect outfit for the concert. They argued for all of five seconds before deciding to try them on. Whoever wore it best won the dress.
As soon as they both came out of their dressing rooms and saw each other, they knew the dress had been made for both of them. So they both bought the same little black dress for tonight.
Only Olivia dolled hers up with a black-and-white skull scarf, black fishnet stockings, and a silver skull choker.
Holly went her usual classy look. Little black dress, black spiked heels, and lots of gold around her neck and wrists, and in her ears. They don’t even look like they were wearing the same dress.
Everyone is standing near the stage, waiting on the band to come out.
The group to the left of the stage is clearly already wasted. Pre-gamers. They’re the ones who get drunk before coming to the party so that they maintain a lower bar tab. There is the group of chicks to the right of the stage who are squealing and jumping up and down like teenage girls at a Justin Bieber concert. And of course I see the group of girls who are looking to go home with one of the band members. I can practically hear them unsnapping their bras now. Groupies.
Juice gets up on stage and the girls and I start screaming, “Juicy!” He winks at us and announces the band. The whole bar erupts in cheers and applause.
We hop off our barstools and jump up and down. We are their biggest fans, after all.
Crossfade makes their grand entrance and starts playing. I look around the bar for Braden. We’ve been here for an hour and haven’t seen him yet. I do, however, find Tristan and Jake, who join our little group after the second song finishes.
The band plays for the next half an hour. Everyone in the place is on their feet including me, Holly, and Olivia.
“Let’s go dance!” I squeal and lead the ladies onto the dance floor.
We start swaying to the music. I close my eyes, lift my arms, and move my body. I am a decent dancer. I’m not a great dancer, but I’m not bad. I let the music move through me.
When the song ends, I open my eyes and look up to see Braden standing before me, staring at me with a heated look in his eyes. I can’t tear my eyes from his. He stares at me with a look that tells me that if we were in private he would devour me. He is wearing his dark jeans that hug him in all of the right places, hanging low on his hips, and a black sleeveless shirt. His tattoos are showing and they are hot.
“Hi,” I breathe.
His hands cup both sides of my face while he continues his assault through eye contact taking my breath of away.
Wow!
“I’d like to take the time to introduce an old buddy of mine. Y’all probably know him. He’s going to sing a song for you all tonight. Braden, where the fuck are you, man?” Les says into the mic.
Wait—what?
“You’re singing?” I ask.
Braden’s face softens and his eyes start to dance. I don’t know if this look is humor or excitement. Either way, it is a great look for him.
He nods his head and presses his lips to my forehead. “I’ll be back.” he winks and he is gone.
When we were together, he used to sing to me while we were alone. Never in front of others. He never thought he was that good.
Oh, but he is. Braden is a beautiful singer. So beautiful that, if he really wanted it, he could go professional. He is no karaoke singer. All rock and roll.
Braden jumps up on to the stage and the crowd gets louder. The men holler and the women scream. He looks amazing up there.
I stand up on my stool and scream his name as loudly as I can. He looks back at me and gives me his sexy smile. That smile alone makes my entire body tingle.
The way he presents himself up on that stage—total rock star.
“I’d like to sing a special song tonight that I wrote a few months ago. It’s about a very special person in my life. I just hope that she likes it.”
“Oh my God,” I breathe.
Holly’s and Olivia’s arms go around my waist and my shoulders.
The crowd roars. Braden turns to the band and nods. Les nods back. Ed, the group’s lead singer, stands by him with a mic, gives him a man pat on the back, and smiles.
We move to the center of the mob scene before the stage so that I can get closer. That’s as far as I make it.
The music starts and Braden looks at me with such intensity that it almost scares me. A shiver runs through my spine as I watch him.
He begins to sing a beautiful song. A song about a guy who is so in love with the girl of his dreams, only for her to unexpectedly break things off with him, no warning, no explanation. He sings about heartache and pain and about wanting nothing more than to bring his girl back. He sings about protecting her from her past and those who did harm to her.
The tears roll down my face as I stand there watching him watch me as he sings this beautiful, sweet song.
When he reaches the chorus, he closes his eyes, holding th
e microphone with both hands while pouring his heart and soul into the song. My feet start to move. I can’t stop myself. My brain goes on strike and my body takes over. I walk to the stage, hitch a foot up, and climb on.
I go to him and stand in front of him while he continues to sing to the very end. All the while, I’m studying his gorgeous, pained face.
The song ends. Braden takes a deep breath, opens his eyes, and he looks right at me. His eyes widen and he smiles.
I lunge at him. I put my hands at the sides of his face and bring his lips to mine. He lets go of the microphone stand, which wobbles then falls to the stage. He wraps his arms around my waist, bringing my body to his. Our kiss gets deeper, wetter, and ravenous while his hands travel up my back and into my hair. I wrap my arms around his neck.
“Get a room!” some jackass yells, and everyone in the bar starts laughing.
I pull back from him and look into his eyes.
“Emma,” he sighs.
“I hope the gig is over, Braden.”
He clears his throat. “Why is that?”
“Because you’re taking me to your place. Right fucking now.”
“You’re a bossy little thing,” Braden smirks.
“Say goodbye to your fans.”
He leans back, wrapping one arm around my waist, bringing me to his side, and curling my front into him.
“Thank you for coming out tonight,” he chokes out to the audience and pulls me off the stage with him.
We head right out the back door.
*****
I barely make it into the apartment before I am spun around and Braden’s mouth takes over mine. His eager hands are pulling on my waist.
Braden pulls back and looks down at me with his lips parted, a dark, hooded look in his eyes. He slams the door shut behind him and walks me backward until we hit the wall. He is lifting my shirt off. I raise my arms to help him out and off it goes.
He slides his hand around to the back of my head pulling me in closer. Our hips meet and I feel Braden’s proof that he is clearly aroused.
“I need you now, Em,” he rasps against my mouth.
