The Do-Gooder
Jessie L. Star
Please note this novel is written in Australian English and was originally published under the penname star123.
Dedicated to Leah ‘Peggy my Lass’, Lynelle and Sami-Ray who, throughout the writing of this book (and my life in general), popped up intermittently to douse me in confidence and good times. Loves!
Contents
Prologue – What Was
Chapter 1 – The Rules
Chapter 2 –The Naked Education
Chapter 3 – The Little Townsend
Chapter 4 – Family Night
Chapter 5 – Hot Babies and Sticky Floors
Chapter 6 – A Pyre of Wanton Flames
Chapter 7 – Favourite Soap Opera
Chapter 8 – A Common Enemy
Chapter 9 – Missing and Found
Chapter 10 – Want and Release
Chapter 11 – Submit
Chapter 12 – Fine
Chapter 13 – Girls Like Her
Chapter 14 – The Hero Complex
Chapter 15 – Mint Biscuits and Cowardice
Chapter 16 – Red Light
Chapter 17 – Talk to Me
Chapter 18 – Agree to Disagree
Chapter 19 – Can’t Breathe
Chapter 20 – Fault
Chapter 21 – Actions have Consequences
Chapter 22 – Done
Epilogue – What Is
Prologue – What Was
"Now," I breathed into Fletcher's ear, dancing a couple of fingers lightly along the back of his neck and then abruptly pulling away through the crowd.
I sashayed towards the door leading out into the garden, knowing that he was watching the sway of my hips, knowing that he wasn't going to say no to me this time.
The party was in full swing, the place was packed, but who cared that other people saw? Who cared that he wasn't mine to have? The power made me breathless, made my heart beat faster and a pool of heat start deep in my belly and spread down lower…
Years of flirting and fighting, of verbal foreplay and subtle caresses and it was finally going to happen. Right now.
I leant back against the weatherboards in the cool air outside, ignoring the clusters of smokers eying me interestedly. My interest was on his way.
I started to count silently in my head. 1…2…3…
He barrelled through the door and snatched me by the wrist, glaring at the smokers until they turned away, and then dragging me round the corner of the house where we slipped into shadow. Hidden by an unruly rhododendron dripping with blood red flowers he leant into me, making us the only two people in the world.
"What are you doing to me?" He muttered, his breath hot against my cheek. "How do you always manage to do this?"
I wriggled against him enjoying the way his muscles contracted at the contact. "Talent," I said archly.
He cursed and then he was pushing me back against the house, his mouth covering mine. He tasted of sun, surf, beer and victory.
I hummed low in my throat and started to pull at the buttons on his shirt, pushing the fabric back and dragging my nails across his chest.
This was why I’d snuck out tonight, to collect what I’d wanted for so long from him. This was going to make everything OK. How could it not when everything about him, from the way his build swamped mine, to the precise positioning of his grip on my hips, was just...right?
I arched as he rucked my dress up and pressed forward, hitching one of my legs up around his waist. My head fell against his shoulder and, for a moment, we paused, panting.
"What are we doing?" He whispered, his lips brushing against my neck. "Lara, what the hell are we doing?"
"This." I used my leg to press him even closer against me and then turned my head to nip at his ear. "And don't you dare stop."
~*~
It was a game and I was used to winning. Maybe that was why I never really thought about my competitors. That changed with Salida. It changed the moment we went back inside, our clothes rumpled, our faces flushed, and she was waiting for us.
Her look seared me, burning away my satisfaction at finally sinking into the release of her boyfriend; his kisses turning to ashes in my mouth.
"If you wanted him, why didn't you take him when you had the chance?" Her voice had been quiet, her lilting accent making her harsh words sing. "Why wait until I wanted him, until we wanted each other? It's sick, Lara, the things you do are sick."
Sick. That word landed on my skin and seeped into every pore, twisting through my brain until it found its match, my mother's voice breathy and panicked, 'your brother is sick'.
"You can take things from people, you can even take people from people, but you're never going to get what you want," Salida had continued in front of everyone, her words condemning. "You're never going to be worth anything. You're never going to be any good."
It wasn't the worst thing I'd ever had said to me, far from it, but it was those words I found myself repeating over and over to myself later that week as I stood over Donny's coffin.
You're never going to be any good.
And, although I believed down to my very core that what Salida had said was true, I decided then to start trying to change anyway. I tried to be better. I tried to be stronger.
I tried to be good.
Chapter 1 – The Rules
"Stop fidgeting, girls prefer men who don't constantly look like they have a bladder infection."
I slicked yet another tacky coat of vibrant red gloss across my lips, grimacing as the chemicals made my mouth start to feel dry.
"Right," I hopped off the counter I was sharing with the sink and landed in front of the nervous red-head pressed into the small bathroom with me. He was the one who was now holding himself so still he looked like he'd crack from the strain.
Rolling my eyes, I grabbed him by the collar and dragged him down to plant a huge, sticky kiss on the corner of his mouth. Leaning back to admire my work I was pleased to see a distinct outline of my lips imprinted on him.
Reaching up, I ruffled his hair and then bunched my fists into his shirt, tugging and pulling until it was rumpled and creased. Once I was happy with the result, I took him by the shoulders and turned him to face the mirror.
"I call this look 'recent debauchery'," I announced matter-of-factly. "And it's always in season."
"I don't know, Lara," Gavin started shifting around again as he eyed his newly dishevelled reflection, "it's just not really me."
"Exactly the point," I said brusquely, lifting a hand up to smear the edge of the lipstick mark on his cheek. Seeing that he still wasn't convinced, I sighed and turned him roughly back round to face me.
"Look, Gav, you know the saying 'fake it 'til you make it'? Well, this is your 'fake'. You said that you spend all your time at parties convinced that people are looking at you and thinking 'what a loser', well now you have to take that neuroticism and use it to your advantage."
I considered his crotch for a moment and then reached down and undid his fly, just a little bit. I found that sticking my hand near his privates did at least get him to stop jiggling about again, although the look of abject fear on his face didn't exactly fit the cocky image I'd created for him.
"Hey, cool it." I snapped my fingers in his face to draw his attention back to what I was saying. "You need to get it into your head that people are looking at you and thinking 'God damn, that guy just got dragged into the toilet by some random girl who proceeded to have raunchy sex with him. Seriously, his dick must be enormous'. Maybe they'll think you're kind of gross and slutty, maybe they'll think you're some massive player, whatever, 'loser' won't come into it."
He cut a quick look back across at the mirror and, as I watched, straightened ou
t his shoulders and gave a little nod. "Raunchy sex, enormous dick," he repeated, "OK."
"There you go." I clapped him on the back. "You'll do fine."
"Thanks, Lara." For the first time since he'd sidled up to me at the library and stammered out his request, Gav met my gaze squarely. "For all your help...I wouldn't have…just seriously, thank you."
I closed my eyes for a split second and felt the buzz of validation tingle all the way down to my toes.
"Get out there." Riding high on my hit, the instruction came out alarmingly soppy so I made a conscious effort to harden my tone as I added, "If I hear this was a waste of my Friday night you're in trouble."
I gave him a little shove towards the door and he obediently started towards it before stopping and fishing his wallet out of his pocket.
"For the goodwill pot," he said, passing over $20 which I tucked inside my bra with a smirk. I'd kissed a boy and received money in return, my mother would be so proud.
"Thank you, now rack off."
And, finally, he did, walking out of the bathroom with as much nonchalance as an incredibly nervous guy impersonating a post-party-hook-up attitude can muster.
I shut the door quickly behind him, not wanting anyone to catch sight of me. Not that I'd be embarrassed by anyone thinking I'd been Gav's random skank. Frankly, in the eyes of some, 'random skank' would've been a definite step up. It wasn't ego to say that nearly every person out there knew of me; either as a boyfriend stealing slut, or as Bay Uni's official do-gooder.
I didn't particularly resent these dichotomous reputations, they were both true, it was just that, well known as I was, I always ended up skulking around in the background of my plans. Or, in this case, escaping out the bathroom window in a dress way too short for such an activity.
Still, needs must, so with my heels dangling from my fingers and the glass pane propped up with an elbow, I managed to wriggle forward until I was straddling the wooden window ledge. My tight jersey dress rode high up on my hips, but looking down; it appeared that the coast was clear and the drop absolutely manageable.
I swung myself round until I was dangling from my fingers and then let go, landing with a solid thump on the hard pavement.
As I straightened, a glow in the darkness caught my eye and I realised that I'd been incorrect in my quick appraisal that there was nobody about. There was, in fact, a guy standing to one side of the window I'd just jumped out of, a cigarette paused midway to his mouth, his eyes wide.
Calmly pushing my dress back down and slipping my shoes onto my feet I met his stare coolly.
"Smoking'll kill you," I informed him, blowing him a quick kiss and marching past off into the night.
~*~
Stares warmed the back of my neck, but I was used to it. At some stage my detractors would surely realise the futility of trying to shame me out of boldly claiming the most central table at the uni ref. Still, today was the first day of my last semester and it hadn't happened yet.
It was good, this attention. Not only did it mean that anyone who needed to find me to ask for my help would only have to follow other's stares, but also, it made the time I spent coordinating my outfit incredibly worthwhile.
With my laptop before me, I was content sitting as a centrepiece to the hall typing away at an email. I didn't expect company, or particularly desire it, but hadn't been there long before I felt a presence at my elbow. I glanced up and saw Merry Hawthorn, my most persistent hanger on, grinning down at me, her solid hunk of a boyfriend scowling beside her. The scowl was ho hum, he was one of Fletcher's oldest mates so his frosty attitude was to be expected.
"Hey Daz," I purred, rewarding his bad attitude by leaning forward ever so slightly and cocking my head in a way I knew would make his gaze follow the long line of my neck down to my cleavage. There was absolutely nothing more entertaining in life than making guys who didn't like you accidentally check you out. Sure enough, his eyes slid down and then snapped back up and his glower deepened.
"Oh, stop it, the pair of you." Merry threw herself down into the seat opposite me and flapped her hand at Daz dismissively. "Bugger off, sweetie, I'll catch up with you later."
Daz didn't look particularly happy about being waved away, but after one last filthy look at me, he obediently trundled off to the large table near the window; the one I'd been purposefully avoiding looking at for the past half hour. I knew Fletch was there with his group of mates, not that I'd seen him, but because I'd bloody sensed him.
"Let me guess, you're writing to the Spanish government to request that the running of the bulls goes through our campus this year because some guy thought it'd be dope."
I refocused on Merry, raising my eyebrows at the non-sequitur, and she nodded towards the laptop in explanation.
"No," I disagreed. "I'm emailing the CEO of some obscure Ukrainian soft drink company to see if he'll ship me down a bottle."
"Because some guy thought it'd be dope?"
No, because a girl had asked if it was possible to get some for her dad's 60th birthday as he'd loved the stuff as a kid growing up in the Ukraine. That wasn't something Merry needed to know, however, so I shrugged, saying vaguely, "Yeah, sure."
Merry, as was her wont, ignored my less than enthusiastic response, contently cracking open her plastic lunch container.
"So I did a recon mission for you last night," she commented as she dug in. "Not that you're likely to thank me."
Picking up the plastic fork that had come with my own food I stirred the salad round a bit and waited for Merry to expand. Sure enough, she couldn't help herself.
"So, that Gavin guy, he went into the bathroom with you all hunched and pathetic and then you pulled your fairy godmother stunt and he got swagger." Ever true to her name, Merry was managing to grin, eat, and not get to the point all at the same time.
We had an unspoken partnership, Merry and I. I set the plans in motion and Merry kept an eye on them and reported back. It was a system that had worked well for almost three years, but she still couldn't help dragging it out…and I couldn't help trying to disguise the fact that it drove me crazy.
To this end, I toyed with my wilted lettuce and idly tapped away at my laptop. It was silly really, Merry knew I enjoyed her debriefs and the lack of interest was just a front, but then, I also knew that Merry's desire to gossip would always trump her desire to watch me squirm and today was no exception.
"Seriously, La-La, he bloody rocked it," she exclaimed, her blonde curls bouncing in excitement, her enthusiasm in no way dampened by her audience's lack of same. "I mean, he didn't do anything particularly, you know, that would've been too weird for him. He just sort of leant against the wall and looked round all cool and stuff and it totally worked. Everyone was asking each other what had happened and who he'd been with, it was like being in high school again."
Only Merry, I observed wryly, would reference high school scandal with such genuine fondness.
"And, oh my God, I haven't even told you my favourite bit yet!" Evidently she’d grown sick of my feigned disinterest as she reached across the table and slapped my laptop shut just as I sent off the email.
"Yes, alright, your favourite bit?" I prompted my air-headed little spy as her pause for dramatic effect dragged out.
"People were asking him what had happened, and he wiped the lip gloss away when someone pointed it out, but he didn't say anything!"
I waited to see if there was going to be more, but Merry was looking at me expectantly. I suppose, to someone like her, maintaining silence would seem extraordinary.
"So he did OK, then?" I felt another little buzz, a smaller one than last night, but still enough to make the conversation with Merry worthwhile.
"He did great." Merry shoved a large forkful of pasta salad into her mouth and then spoke excitedly through the carbohydrates, "Hey, why don't you switch to that full time? You know, sexy make-overs for the socially awkward?"
I wiped a fleck of Merry's lunch off my shoulder and grimaced. "If
you want to start creating gossip fodder that's your look out," I said grimly, "but leave me out of it."
"Your loss." Merry scraped up the last of her meal, something behind me catching her eye as she chewed. "Oh, look out, looks like you've got another customer," she chirped, and I turned to see a mousy girl hovering by my shoulder. I nodded to let her know I'd be right with her and then looked back at Merry who was packing up her stuff.
"Right, well, let me know when you want to pretend you don't need me again, you big, bad bitch of good you," she said cheerily.
I flattened my lips to hide my smile, but the problem with Merry was that she could sense a good humour a mile off and she smirked to show she wasn't fooled for a second. As she stood, she reached over to give my ponytail a cheeky tug and then she was gone.
Turning my attention to the other girl, I waved her forward and she came and took Merry's place.
"Are you Lara?" The newcomer asked breathlessly. "The girl who does nice things?"
"Good things," I promptly corrected her, pulling Big Blue out of my bag
Big Blue was my massive blue binder that held my life. There was a page-a-day calendar at the front that was lightly peppered with class schedules and the few social commitments I wasn't able to get out of, but was mostly packed with good deed engagements. On the pages that came after, each deed I was currently managing had a page or two set aside where I could list down the specifications. Big Blue was tattered and scarred and the most important thing in my life.
"And you are…?"
"Livvy."
"OK, Livvy," I scribbled her name down on a fresh page in Big Blue, "what can I do for you?"
Livvy blinked wide, china doll eyes at me and sat back a little in her chair. "It's as simple as that?"
I pushed my sad little salad to one side and gave her a firm look. I hated the explanation stuff, but I supposed it was necessary for people not up on what I did.
"Right, rules are, one good deed per person so pick carefully. Also, if I do it or not is completely at my discretion. Other than that, you tell me what good deed you'd like done and I try and find a way to make it happen. I don't charge, but some people like to contribute a bit of money towards the goodwill pot that I then use if I need to with another person's deed." I tapped my pen against Big Blue, aware that I had class in fifteen minutes and needed to move things along. "Any questions?"
The Do-Gooder Page 1
