by Dahlia West
Out of all the things Sawyer could say—and he’d said some doozies in his time—this one surprised the hell out of Seth. And angered him. “Bullshit,” he snapped and started to walk away.
“You can say that,” Sawyer called after him. “But I know it’s true.”
Seth couldn’t fight with Court anymore and didn’t want to, but he was still twitchy and pissed off that everything had been such a cluster fuck. He whirled on Sawyer, who didn’t so much as flinch despite Seth’s bruised, flexing knuckles and sharp glare. “What could we possibly have in common?” Seth asked. “Besides a last name? Huh, Sawyer? What? Go ahead! Enlighten me! We both make fart noises with our armpits at the dinner table? I’m pretty sure that’s just you. You couldn’t take anything seriously if your life depended on it.”
Sawyer just looked at him, uncowed by his accusations. “We both do what we can to make it easier for everyone else.”
All Seth’s anger seemed to deflate at once, leaving him standing in front of a brother that he wasn’t quite sure he knew anymore.
“I make jokes,” Sawyer continued. “You make sacrifices. I didn’t go on the road with Court to rope steers during the day and drink myself under the table every night. He needed someone with him, to keep him out of trouble. And I tried. God knows, I tried. I told him to stop cheating. To slow down. To grow up. I mostly failed, but I did try.”
Sawyer sighed. “He was on a downward spiral, Seth, long before Dad died, long before we came back here. I think he got scared. And I think Dad’s death shook him up. And I think Walker pissing all over him pushed him right up to the edge he’d been inching closer to for a very long time. You know that saying. ‘When you look into the abyss…’ Court saw himself, really saw himself, and it scared the hell out of him. So now he’s pushing back, doing all the things he thinks he’s supposed to do, and in all the wrong ways, like only Court can. He’s trying, though.”
“For himself,” Seth spat. “He’s trying for himself. Not for them. Not for Rowan and Willow.”
Sawyer sighed and threw up his hands. “Well…maybe that’s the first step. Maybe he’s just headed in the right direction but he’s not there yet.”
Seth shook his head. Not that Sawyer’s words weren’t possibly true, but that Seth didn’t want Rowan and Willow to be used as pawns or stepping stones on Court’s way to becoming a man. “They deserve better than that,” he growled.
“They deserve you.”
Seth blew out a harsh breath. He’d certainly like to think so, but he wasn’t quite sure he bought that. All said and done, he had played Court a little dirty. He’d put off telling the truth about his feelings for Rowan, long before he’d ever tumbled into her bed. Somewhere underneath all the anger and inappropriate comments, Court had himself a point. “I don’t know,” he replied, but the protest was weak because, damn it, he still wanted them—Rowan and Willow—even if he wasn’t quite worthy of them.
Chapter Twenty-Four
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Rowan tucked Willow into bed, listening to her daughter chatter happily about Caramel and Snake River and cookies and her daddy. Maintaining a smile was difficult since her mind kept wandering back to the fight between Court and Seth. Would it always be like that, both brothers at each other’s throats for the rest of their lives? She sighed inwardly and hoped not.
It figured that the love of her life came with strings attached, difficulties and challenges that she had to face head on. Nothing, it seemed, in Rowan Archer’s life would ever be simple.
As she eased the bedroom door closed, her heart skipped a beat as she heard the sound of tires in the driveway. She hurried downstairs and opened the front door to let Seth in. He caught her in his arms before he even took off his hat, crushing his mouth to hers and holding her close.
She breathed deep, finally relaxing now that he was here. His now-familiar woody scent filled her nostrils as his tongue filled her mouth. There were no words between them—none needed—as he picked her up and carried her upstairs to the guest bedroom.
As much as Rowan wanted him, she was still troubled about the fight. Closing the door firmly, she said, “This is a mess.”
Seth frowned and set his hat on the dresser.
Rowan wanted to run her hands through his tousled hair.
“He’ll get over it,” he declared. “It’ll just take time.”
She pictured Court’s furious look, the venomous words that had dripped from his lips, and somehow she didn’t think so. And he probably wouldn’t be the only one. “The Barlow broodmare,” she whispered to herself.
Seth looked at her with his brow furrowed. “What?”
“That’s what people are going to say about me. That I’m easy.”
“I don’t care. I’ll be standing right beside you if they do, and I’ll beat the shit out of them, too.” Seth kicked off his boots one at a time. They thudded softly on the hardwood floor. “Now get undressed for me,” he demanded. “Show me what’s mine.”
Rowan felt a now-familiar flutter in her lower belly and took a deep breath before she took hold of the hem of her oversized shirt and pulled it off over her head. She let it fall to the floor and stood before him in only her panties. Her nipples were already aching and swollen as she watched him reach for his belt buckle.
“Stop,” she said suddenly.
Seth’s brow furrowed, and his hands hovered over the waistband of his jeans.
“Let me,” she told him and stepped closer.
Seth watched, eyes dark, jaw firmly set, as Rowan loosened the leather strap.
The memory of his mouth on her, his tongue in her, sent a shiver of desire through her. And though Rowan had no doubt that if she laid back on the bed and spread her legs for him he’d do it again, it was time to return the favor. She tugged at the button first, then the zipper, and slowly knelt in front of him. Inches from her face, his smooth, thick shaft was revealed.
Rowan got a good look this time as she held it in her hands. Long and hard, there was no way she could take it all, but she leaned forward and took a slow lick of the underside of the head. Seth groaned a little, and she felt a growing wetness between her thighs at his response. She teased him a little, tonguing and stroking, just to see what he’d do, how long he could hold out. He impressed her with his self-control, not touching her or demanding more.
He was salty-sweet, and that little pearl of desire that wept from his slit tasted like Heaven. She let it fall on her tongue, looking up to make sure he was watching.
He was.
“You taste good,” she whispered.
“I’m sure you taste better. And when you’re done torturing me down there, you’re going sit on my face and remind me just how good.”
Rowan shivered again. The offer was tempting—so tempting—but Seth deserved everything she could do for him and more.
“Rowan,” he whispered, and that was all the encouragement she needed. She took him as far in her mouth as she could manage, savoring the taste of him. She knew she wasn’t good at it, but he didn’t seem to mind that at all. His control slipped, just for a moment, and he ran his fingers gently through her hair. Moments later, he pushed her away. “Stop. You have to stop.”
He had her up quickly, off her knees and across the room to the bed. He turned them both as they walked and laid down first, pulling her on top of him. “Come on,” he prodded. “Saddle up.”
She laughed as she blushed, and her hands fluttered to her bare breasts.
Seth grasped her wrists and pulled them apart. “One, don’t you dare cover up what’s mine. Two, get that sweet pussy on my lips. Now.”
Rowan had never done anything more adventurous than doggy style. And only once. She felt a thrill in her belly about being so damned naughty. It was still nerve-wracking, though. Seth seemed to know exactly what he wanted, while all she knew was that she wanted him. She must have hesitated for too long, because he grabbed her hips suddenly and yanked her down. She cried out as his hot mouth sealed itself
against her and had to bite down on her lower lip when he pushed his tongue inside. Once again Seth was starving for her, as she was for his particular brand of attention.
He sucked and nibbled and licked furiously, not gentle like before, but ferocious, frenzied this time.
She loved it.
Seth, with his perfect mix of rough yet gentle handling of her, was sending Rowan to dizzying heights. She rocked over his lips, thrilling with every lick, every hot breath. She tried to stop, tried to slow down, like he’d ordered her to do for him, but Seth must have sensed it, must have known she was close. He pushed her down just enough to pull her clit into his mouth.
Stars burst behind Rowan’s eyes as her whole body tightened. He swirled and bit and licked fervently all through her orgasm. When she could no longer hold herself up, she found herself lifted, rolling, moving underneath him. Her eyes were half-closed, dreamy and satisfied.
Almost satisfied.
Somewhere in the tangle of sheets and breathless euphoria, she heard the rustling of his clothes. Then Seth was finally over her, naked, hard, ready. He pushed into her still-throbbing core, and she bit his shoulder to stifle a scream. His fucking was raw and unrestrained, and Rowan had to wrap her legs and arms around him to hold on.
He drove into her hard, over and over, edging her ever closer to another orgasm. He held off on his own, like before, until Rowan felt the sweet clench that sent her soaring again. Seth’s own release pumped inside her, each throb and pulse stretching her wider, opening her to him even more.
Huddled together under the heavy blanket, he kissed the top of her head as she drifted off to sleep up against him. She didn’t know how long she’d get to keep him this time, but the small, dark hours belonged to them, and she cuddled closer to make the most of it until morning.
Chapter Twenty-Five
‡
Seth dressed in the dark again and would’ve let her sleep, but she rose and insisted on following him downstairs. She made them coffee, and they took their mugs to the porch, sitting quietly in the dark. He wanted to stay, until the sun fully rose, and honestly longer after that. It was hell only being able to possess her in short snatches, stolen moments that were cast out like the darkness when the sun rose over the hills. Soon enough, though, they’d figure it all out, nail down all the details. Anyone living in Wyoming long enough came to understand that nothing was easy out here, nothing came easy…or fast…or free.
They were always at the mercy of the weather, of the mercurial moods of brothers, of God, and His unfathomable plan, which sometimes didn’t feel like a plan at all but more like punishment, meted out disproportionately—and randomly.
He rose from his chair when the mug was empty and he could no longer find an excuse to stay. “Tonight,” he said quietly before he kissed her, before he crossed the driveway and started his truck. He let the engine warm up a moment before he headed down the highway toward his own spread. Things seemed quiet as he pulled into the driveway. The lights in the kitchen of the Big House were on. Sofia was probably cleaning up after breakfast, which Seth had purposely slept through so he could spend more time with Rowan.
He might as well skip a shower, too, until the hard labor of the morning was finished. He was already behind, he felt, and felt duty bound to catch back up before noon. As he headed toward the barn, he glanced at the bunkhouse and sighed. He wasn’t particularly interested in another showdown with his brother, but he’d already put it off for too long.
He’d sit Court down and explain the situation, that Seth and Rowan were in love, and that no one wanted to cut him off but that things had to proceed carefully and always with an eye toward making things easiest for Willow.
On his way toward the low-slung building, Gabe stepped out of the bunkhouse and closed the door firmly behind him. He spotted Seth and headed across the gravel. Even in the dark-gray haze of morning, Seth saw the younger man’s grimace.
“I don’t suppose Court’s awake?” Seth asked him. “Doing chores already?”
Gabe shook his head. “I don’t know if he slept so much as passed out. I tried to wake him for work, but he wasn’t having it. And to be honest, he does look a little worse for wear. And for some reason, his hat’s wet.”
Seth sighed, slipped off his own hat, and looked up at the pearlescent sky overhead. “I may have gone a little hard on him,” he admitted.
Gabe snorted. “If it came from you, then he definitely deserved it. Can’t say I haven’t wanted to pop him a few times for being downright lazy. But never over a woman. They’re not worth it.”
Seth frowned. He supposed it was none of his business anyway. Gabe had loved a woman once. From New York City, no less. She’d come to Wyoming, sick of the rat race, she’d said. Interested in cute boots and cute cowboys. One freezing Teton winter was all it took to send her packing. All Seth really knew was that things had ended badly and Gabe hadn’t chased her.
“Rowan is,” he replied, though, because he couldn’t let even an unintentional slight against her go unchallenged.
Gabe simply nodded. “If she’s the woman for you, then she must be.” He pulled his jacket tighter around himself and stalked off in the direction of the barn.
Seth turned to the closed door of the bunkhouse and debated waking up Court just to finish things off. Before he’d figured out what he wanted to do, he heard shouting from the barn.
Gabe must have heard it, too, because he broke into a jog.
Seth abandoned arguing with Court in favor of finding out who else was having difficulties. He and Gabe entered the front sliding door, saw Sawyer stepping out of the barn’s office, and all three of them made their way down the hallway toward the indoor ring. There, Austin and Walker were pummeling each other in a scene eerily reminiscent of Seth and Court’s row the day before. So much so that Seth glanced at the trough to make sure Dakota had refilled it. Just in case.
Austin got in a punch, and Walker quickly countered it, spinning his barely younger brother. Austin turned back, looking twice as pissed off, fists still at the ready. “I’m a part of this family, too, in case you’ve forgotten! We’ve all got the same last name, Walker. That money isn’t yours to sit on like a fucking dragon!” Austin bellowed. “Why can’t we spend some of it?”
“Because it’s blood money!” Walker cried.
Austin froze, midswing.
“Don’t you get it?” Walker spat. “Don’t you understand? He wanted to die! He rode out into that storm as his last sacrifice—for us—so we’d have enough money to keep the place going.”
Austin shook his head and backed up a step. “No,” he countered. “No, that’s not true.”
“It is true.”
“How do you know?” Austin demanded. “Did he…did he say something to you?” His arm cocked again, ready to deliver another blow, apparently, at the idea that Walker might have known they were going to lose Dad.
“No,” Walker replied. “He didn’t say anything.”
Austin hesitated. “Did he leave a note?”
Walker shook his head.
“Then you don’t know!” Austin concluded. “You don’t know that’s how it happened! So stop talking shit about Da—”
“I do!” Walker argued. “I do know.”
“How?!”
“I just do. I just know. I can’t…I can’t explain it to you. You wouldn’t understand. I’m the only one who’s supposed to know. But you kept pushing with your batshit crazy plans. You just wouldn’t let it go.”
Austin ran at him again and collided into Walker, who instead of pushing him away, pulled him in close. Austin couldn’t get a good swing in.
“You were never supposed to know!” the eldest Barlow shouted. His scream reverberated off the corrugated metal walls.
“It’s a lie!” Austin cried. “You don’t know shit. Dad didn’t kill himself. And what about Manny? He sure as shit didn’t kill himself. He’d never—”
Beside Seth, Gabe made a strangled noise, announ
cing their presence to the feuding twins. Everyone turned to see Gabe’s furious look, his flashing, dark eyes, his hands fisted at his sides.
Seth stifled a groan.
“No,” Walker moaned, eyes wide, gazing at them all. “No, no, no.”
Gabe turned and fled out the side door, right past Court, who looked bewildered.
“Dad?” Court asked, looking at each of them.
When no one responded, Court turned to the twins, blinking furiously. “Dad?” he repeated, his voice sharper, more brittle.
Walker glared at Austin and shoved him away. He pushed so hard that Austin tumbled to the ground, landing on his hip in the dirt. “This is your fault!” Walker accused in a raw-throated voice. “This is on you. They never had to know. I never would’ve told them. They didn’t have to know.”
Court turned and disappeared into the darkness outside. Seth helped Austin up off the ground while Sawyer stood silently, watching over all of them. His trademark half-cocked grin had been wiped off his face, and the man had apparently been rendered entirely speechless for once.
Walker sighed, picked up his dirty hat off the ground, and stomped away from them all.
Seth watched his oldest brother go, realizing that the weight of the burden Walker was carrying had been so much more than any of them had known.
Chapter Twenty-Six
‡
Rowan washed the mugs and allowed herself a moment of peace and quiet before she had to go and let out the flock. It was easy to get caught up, lost in a daydream of mornings with Seth, nights with Seth, a life with Seth. For the first time since she could remember, she caught herself humming as she dried what she’d come to think of as his mug with the dishtowel.
To hell with Court, she thought angrily. What right did he have to try and ruin her future the same way he’d done to her past? And he was a fine one to judge when it came to sleeping around, the man who couldn’t keep it in his pants if his life depended on it.
