by Gold, Kristi
No more kisses for her today. She’d done too much of that already for reasons that defied logic. Not that logic had ever come into play when Sam was involved. He’d presented a challenge, and something primal had driven her to act the fool that she’d always been around him. He certainly hadn’t been wrong on one point—desire was a powerful motivator—and she refused to give in to it again.
Fortunately, Jamie had been seated between them during the meal, providing Savannah with some much-needed separation from Sam. More important, Jamie had made it through the meal without mentioning her suspicions about the kiss. Accurate suspicions. And since the little girl had disappeared with Gracie a few minutes ago, it appeared they might actually be in the clear.
“I hear the two of you were swapping gum out in the shop.”
Savannah nearly spewed iced tea all over the table after Jim’s sudden proclamation. She dabbed at her mouth with a napkin and sent a panicky look at Sam.
And like the cad he could be, he grinned as if he found the situation quite amusing. “Who told you that, Dad?”
“Your kid.”
“She’s always had one heck of an active imagination,” Sam said without looking at Savannah.
Jim snorted. “She’s got enough smarts to realize that country boys don’t wear lipstick.”
Savannah pondered how on earth she would escape this predicament. Leaving would be too obvious. Crawling beneath the table would, too. Fortunately, Gracie picked that moment to breeze into the dining room. And even better, she didn’t return with Jamie, saving the little girl from some questionable conversation. At least Savannah could count on Sam’s stepmother to be the perfect portrait of decorum, no matter what Jamie might have revealed.
Gracie stood behind Jim’s chair and rested her palms on her husband’s shoulders. “I’ve hung your dress up to dry, Savannah. But I’m afraid Sam’s hands aren’t going to come out unless I wash it again and use bleach, and that would ruin it.”
So much for decorum. And so much for Sam taking care of it himself. “Don’t worry about it, Gracie,” she said. “I have other dresses.”
“But not with Sam’s mark on ’em, I bet,” Jim added with a smirk.
Both Gracie and Jim chuckled at Savannah’s expense. Worse, Sam chimed right in. Clearly not one of them recognized her mortification.
Savannah desperately wanted to turn the conversation away from anything having to do with grease or lipstick. “By the way, where is Jamie?”
Gracie pulled up a chair and sat next to Jim. “She’s on the phone with her mama. And she told me to tell you that you have to stay and listen to her play the guitar in a bit.”
Savannah wanted to bow out and go home, but she couldn’t in good conscience disappoint a child. Not to mention she no longer had a valid reason to go home. When she’d called to say she was staying for dinner at the McBriars’, her mother informed her that she was too tired to sort through the keepsakes anyway.
As wary as she was of spending more time with her former lover, as much as she didn’t trust herself around him, Savannah saw no reason not to be sociable with his family. A half hour longer wouldn’t matter in the grand scheme of things—as long as she didn’t end up alone with Sam. “I wouldn’t want to miss hearing Jamie play, so I’d be glad to stay for a while.”
“She’s pretty good,” Jim said. “Sam’s been teaching her since she was knee-high to a cricket.”
Savannah gave her attention to Sam, who was turning his fork over and over. “Jamie must come by it honestly,” she said.
Sam didn’t bother to look up from his current preoccupation with the utensils. “She’s going to be a lot better than me if I have any say in the matter. I want to make sure she knows enough while I still have the opportunity.”
He sounded almost despondent, as if for some reason spending time with his child might be coming to an end. Savannah couldn’t fathom Darlene taking Jamie away from him. Or maybe Sam just assumed that someday Jamie would choose other activities over her father. He had his mother’s abandonment to thank for that concern.
Jamie rushed into the room like a miniwhirlwind, guitar in hand, and declared, “We all have to go in the backyard. That’s where I can get my muse.”
This time everyone laughed, followed by Sam asking, “Do you even know what a muse is, Joe?”
Jamie shrugged. “Nope. I heard it on TV. What is a muse, Daddy?”
“I’ll explain it to you some other time,” he said. “It’s late and Savannah needs to get home to her mom.”
Sam was obviously intent on getting rid of her as soon as possible, which only spurred her desire to stay longer. “Don’t hurry on my account. I’m not afraid of the devil or the dark.”
She sent Sam a pointed look and he responded with a noncommittal expression.
Gracie pushed back from the table and stood. “Y’all go on outside while I clear the dishes. I’ll be out in a jiffy with the pudding.”
Savannah saw a prime opportunity and grabbed it. “I’ll help you, Gracie,” she said as she practically jumped out of the chair.
Gracie seemed rather pleased by the offer. “I’d enjoy the company, Savannah.”
Jim stood and kissed Gracie on the cheek. Sam, on the other hand, remained rooted to his seat.
After Jim and Jamie filed out of the dining room and headed toward the back door, Gracie picked up the serving dishes while Savannah walked around the table gathering plates. When she leaned over to take Sam’s, her nerves were strung as tight as a guy wire. But he didn’t move, didn’t speak, didn’t touch her. In fact, he shifted slightly to prevent any contact.
Without even a passing glance at Sam, she followed Gracie into the kitchen that was more familiar than her own. She’d spent hours there with Sam’s then-housekeeper, chatting nonstop while she honed her cooking skills. Skills that she rarely used these days.
The area had remained much the same with butcher-block counters and an oversized white farm sink that she began to fill with hot water. She lost all semblance of concentration when Sam sauntered into the kitchen, hands in pockets. But he didn’t give her a look as he left out the back door.
Savannah blew out a breath of relief as she opened the lower cabinet and fumbled around for a minute, knocking over several items before she finally found what she’d been searching for. She’d been fumbling like an imbecile all day, thanks to Sam.
When Savannah straightened and set the dishwashing liquid on the back of the sink, Gracie moved to her left and smiled. “No need to do anything but rinse off the dishes, sweetie pie. Jimmy gave me a brand-new dishwasher for a wedding gift.”
Savannah kneed the cabinet closed and looked to her right to discover the shiny stainless appliance that Gracie so deserved. “It’s about time.”
“But not so romantic,” Gracie said as she rinsed off the utensils and set them aside on the drainboard. “I told Jimmy that if he’d go out to the workshop and get a tow chain, I could wear it around my neck and maybe then I wouldn’t be so disappointed that he hadn’t bought me a necklace.”
Savannah laughed yet internally cringed over the “workshop” reminder. “I suppose it’s the thought that counts, huh?”
“Yes, and I count my lucky stars that I finally got him to the altar after twenty some-odd years. Did you know it took him five whole years to kiss me?”
“No, I didn’t know that.” Savannah opened the drawer to the washer and lined the top rack with glasses. “I’ve never even heard all the details about how you came to be Jim’s housekeeper, only that you just showed up one day, according to Sam.”
This time Gracie laughed. “Dumb luck or fate sent me here, I’m not sure which. I was twenty-one years old and working at the feed store. Someone told me about the job and I was so sure it would be easier than standing on my feet all day. So I applied and Jimmy hired me. Grandpa Mick, Jimmy’s dad, was still alive then, so that made three males in this house, and after seeing the state of the place, I almost left and never came ba
ck.”
Savannah could picture Gracie way back when, before time had painted silver in her dark hair and fine lines above her brow. “But you did come back. Why?”
Gracie wiped her hands on a dish towel and leaned a hip against the cabinet. “Because I took one look at that lost little five-year-old boy who didn’t know why his mama had left him behind, and I couldn’t leave.”
When Savannah had met him, Sam still possessed some of those lost-boy traits—a risk-taker and borderline troublemaker. Had it not been for his father’s iron-hand influence, he might have turned out differently considering his mother’s careless disregard. “Your feelings for Jim didn’t play a role?”
Gracie smiled. “Actually, not in the beginning. Jimmy was an old grump all the time. But deep down I knew his bad attitude had to do with getting his heart stomped. I just hung in there until he finally came around.” She sighed. “Finding forever with your first love is worth all the trials and tribulations. And the waiting.”
Finding forever with your first love…
Since she’d wised up in adulthood, Savannah had begun to believe that concept was only a fantasy. Rachel and Matt were the exception, and so were Gracie and Jim. Not everyone could be quite that fortunate.
She rinsed off a plate and handed it to Gracie. “There wasn’t anyone special before Jim?”
Gracie leaned over and slid the plate in the dishwasher. “Not really. I dated a couple of boys in high school, but they didn’t hold my attention that long. Of course, for years I had this fear that Linda would show up one day and take Jimmy and Sam away from me.”
A justified concern, in Savannah’s opinion. “Speaking of Linda, does Sam ever hear from her?”
Gracie shook her head. “Up until a few years back, she sent birthday and Christmas cards, but that’s about it. Then a year after Jamie was born, she called Sam. I don’t know what she said to him, but I do know he was upset for days afterward. Everything stopped the following year. No cards or calls. That’s when we discovered she’d passed away from cancer.”
Steeped in shock, Savannah went momentarily silent. “I had no idea.”
“Not many people know,” Gracie said. “You can count on Sam not to say anything. And it’s really very sad. She’d remarried and had a daughter who should be in her early twenties by now.”
Just one more thing Savannah hadn’t been aware of. “Then Sam never met his sister?”
Gracie took a large blue bowl from the refrigerator and placed it on the counter. “No, and I doubt he ever will. As far as I know, Linda never told her husband or the girl about Sam. At least that’s what she said to Jimmy that time she called. I can’t imagine living a lie all those years and carrying it to the grave.”
In some odd way, Savannah did understand why someone might keep that secret, right or wrong. When life rocked along smoothly, many wouldn’t want to upset the applecart.
The screen door creaked open followed by Jim calling, “Gracie and Savannah, the concert’s about to start and I’m ready for my dessert.”
“Hold your horses,” Gracie called back. “We’ll be out in a minute.”
Savannah grabbed one of the bowls from the counter and helped Gracie dole out the banana pudding. They worked in companionable silence until Gracie said, “Just so you know, I didn’t mean to embarrass you over what happened between you and Sam earlier.”
Savannah could issue a denial, but Gracie would see right through her. “It was just one of those things.” One of those things that she would probably live to regret.
Gracie patted Savannah’s cheek. “I know, honey. I imagine it’s hard to control that attraction to each other, even though that could create a bushel of problems for you both.”
Before Savannah could respond, Gracie was halfway out the kitchen with three bowls of pudding balanced in her grasp. Before she could insist that she wasn’t rediscovering anything with Sam. Clichéd animal lust was one thing—caring was another altogether. As she’d told him in the shop, she didn’t feel anything for him. She didn’t dare. And she sure as heck wouldn’t kiss him again.
After she’d had some time to regroup, Savannah carefully walked down the three steps leading to the backyard to join the group. She set the two remaining bowls on the picnic table, then slid onto the chair next to Gracie. Sam was seated in a green metal lawn chair across from the table with Jamie standing next to him.
As he tuned the guitar, Savannah centered her attention on his hands. Hands that she’d always found so strong and appealing, calluses and all. She thought about the men in Chicago, the pretty boys whose idea of manual labor consisted of pounding a computer keyboard. She couldn’t recall one who had hands as strong as Sam’s.
After offering Jamie the guitar, Sam said, “Okay, Joe, it’s all yours.”
The little girl looked suddenly shy. “I want you to sing with me.”
Sam frowned. “This is your show, kiddo.”
“Please, Daddy?”
“Go ahead and sing with her, son,” Jim prodded.
“Yes, do,” Gracie added before turning to Savannah. “You have to see this.”
Jamie took the guitar from Sam and climbed into his lap, her brow furrowed in concentration as she began to strum the guitar. Together father and daughter sang a simple, familiar and beloved lullaby about mockingbirds and gifts.
As Savannah witnessed the tender scene, a host of emotions bore down on her. The pride in Sam’s eyes and the gentle way he treated his child reminded her that she’d known he had a great capacity to love, virtually untapped until he’d been given this precious little girl.
She also thought of her own father, how close they’d been. How she’d always been able to count on him during troubled times, except when it came to battling her mother. But then she’d once relied on Sam as well, before everything had fallen apart.
Savannah summoned every ounce of strength to maintain her composure until the song ended. But when Jamie looked at Sam and said, “I love you, Daddy,” and he replied, “I love you, too, kiddo,” she could no longer trust herself not to break down.
She joined Gracie and Jim in a round of applause before she rose from the chair. “That was beautiful, Jamie,” she said around the knot in her throat. “And I really have to go now.”
Gracie sent her a concerned look. “You haven’t touched your pudding, Savannah. And your dress is still drying.”
“I’ll finish the pudding and Sam can drop the dress off tomorrow,” Jim said. “If the girl needs to go, we should let her.”
After Jamie slid from Sam’s lap, she walked to Savannah and gave her a hug and a sweet, sweet smile. “Floyd liked that song, too. Do you think he can hear us in heaven?”
She softly patted Jamie’s cheek. “I’m sure he can, and I know he enjoyed it as much as I did.”
When Jamie let her go, Savannah clung to her last scrap of self-control. “Thank you for dinner, everyone. I’ll see you soon.”
She barely made it up the steps before the tears began to flow like a country stream. A rogue sob slipped out as she opened the back door and she prayed no one had heard it. As she made her way through the house, she tempered her steps though she dearly wanted to run. Run from the feelings hovering just beneath the surface. Run from the realization that she did still have some latent feelings for her first love. Run from Sam.
It’s best to quit running away from the truth, or one day you’ll wake up to find you’ve run out of places to go….
As Savannah walked out the front door, she acknowledged that for once her mother could very well be right.
CHAPTER SEVEN
WHEN GRACIE STOOD AND announced, “I’ll go see about her,” Sam immediately came to his feet and said, “I’ll go.”
“Can I go, too?” Jamie asked.
He bent and kissed her cheek. “You can go to bed. I’ll tuck you in when I get back.”
Before his daughter could object to the order, Sam sprinted up the cement stairs, Gracie dogging his steps.
He didn’t make it past the kitchen before she called to him to wait. He didn’t want to wait. He wanted to get to Savannah and find out what was wrong, even though he had a few theories.
Out of respect, he turned to his stepmother. “What is it, Gracie?” he asked as he unsuccessfully tried to keep the impatience out of his voice.
She grabbed a couple of tissues from the box on the counter and handed them to him. “She’s going to need these and your kindness.”
Like he didn’t realize that. “I don’t plan to treat her with anything but kindness.”
“She also doesn’t need you toying with her feelings right now. So don’t go thinking you’re going to take advantage of her vulnerability by charming her back into your bed. And don’t forget that no matter what you do, she’ll be leaving again.”
He didn’t need that reminder, and he didn’t need the guilt trip, either. He opened a kitchen drawer and removed a flashlight. “If you’re done with the sermon, I’ve got to go. She could be halfway to Chicago by now.”
She waved him away. “Fine, but don’t forget your manners.”
If he didn’t leave right away, he would.
Sam rushed out the front door and jogged down the path that led to the Greers’ farm. Since Savannah had a head start and seemed to be in a big hurry, he doubted he’d catch up to her before she made it back to the house. But when he emerged from the break in the tree line a few minutes later, he discovered he wasn’t too late after all.
For Sam, the bridge had been the means to get to her. For Savannah, it had served as a refuge for as long as he’d known her. The three-quarter moon provided enough light to outline her silhouette and although he couldn’t make out many details, he figured she’d been crying. Maybe she still was.
