by Caragh Bell
She smiled wanly. ‘New glasses?’ she enquired, hanging her coat on the rack.
‘You’re such a pet to notice! Yeah, I decided on this shape, what do you think?’ He pouted and posed, pretending to be a model.
‘Lovely,’ she answered smiling. ‘Just don’t let Chloe get her hands on them.’
Adam appeared at the doorway of his office. ‘Lydia Kelly, we missed you.’
Joe gasped. ‘Emotion from the boss? Unheard of!’ he whispered loudly.
‘Hi, Adam,’ she said shyly.
He pulled her into a big bear hug. ‘Come into the office,’ he said gruffly. ‘We need to talk.’
Joe’s eyes nearly popped out of his head when he saw the door close.
‘Colin!’ he called.
‘Yeah?’
‘Why has she been hauled in there?’ Joe was on his tip-toes, straining to see through the blinds that concealed the window.
Colin jumped up in alarm. ‘That I don’t know. Maybe it’s about her articles?’
They stood at the door, ears pressed up against it, trying not very successfully to grasp snippets of the conversation that was going on inside.
‘So, things didn’t work out in New York?’ Adam regarded her steadily.
‘No.’ Her face felt frozen in place.
‘Your job is not available anymore, Lydia.’ His gaze didn’t flinch.
‘What?’ she gasped. ‘Oh Adam, please don’t fire me. I’m so sorry for running off, but I thought it was the right thing to do …’ She looked around in despair.
‘Michelle O’Sullivan has left us. She’s getting married to some Italian guy and is moving to Rome.’
‘Michelle O’Sullivan?’ she echoed.
‘Yes. So, we have an opening at the magazine.’
‘You have what?’ Her eyes widened.
‘I would like to offer you the position of feature articles. It will be your domain. You will continue writing in the same way, but with a permanent slot.’
Lydia took a sharp intake of breath. He was offering her a job: a proper career. An opportunity to write and get paid for it.
‘Oh, Adam, thank you!’ Her eyes filled with tears. ‘I’d be honoured.’
‘Great, that’s settled then. Her desk is cleared so just move your stuff in when you like.’ He turned back to his computer screen. ‘Talk later.’
She had been dismissed. Her boss was frowning, staring at his computer screen.
Smiling, she got to her feet. ‘You are so good to take me back, Adam. Thank you so much.’
‘Sure, sure. See yourself out.’ He waved her away.
She opened the door suddenly and barged straight into Colin and Joe, who had been listening outside.
‘Ah, boys!’ she laughed. ‘Really?’
Joe stood up straight and coughed. ‘Are you still with us?’
Colin fanned his face with his hand, clearly stressed. ‘We were worried, Lyd. He looked serious.’
She smiled. ‘I just got offered a job. Not a skivvy, but a writer. I’m going to replace Michelle.’
Shouts and cries of joy ensued as the three of them jumped around in delight. Chloe eyed them suspiciously from behind the partition of her cubicle.
‘That’s just the greatest news ever!’ exclaimed Colin. ‘I think I’m about to die of pride.’
‘Well done, you!’ said Joe, smiling from ear to ear. ‘We must celebrate.’
Helen was out shopping when Lydia arrived home the next weekend. Her father was the sole occupant of the house, sitting at the kitchen table doing a Sudoku puzzle. He smiled broadly when she walked in.
‘Your mother was waiting for you all day,’ he said, taking her in his arms. She breathed in his familiar smell; for a moment, she wished she was a small girl again, safe in his arms.
‘Where is she now?’
‘Gone to Lidl. She saw some raclette machine in the brochure and has her heart set on it.’
‘Colin has one of those, but it’s from Brown Thomas. No Lidl for him.’ She sat down at the table and pulled the newspaper towards her. ‘Can I help?’
Seán snatched the paper away. ‘Keep away! I’m about twelve squares away from the end.’
A big pot was bubbling on the hob and the air smelt of fresh bread. Lydia thought of her own disastrous cooking attempts in the very same kitchen a couple of weeks ago and felt a pain in her chest. They had been so happy.
Ollie sauntered into the kitchen, the remote control in his hand. ‘Ted! Mum never mentioned you were coming home.’
‘Well, here I am.’ She made a face. ‘Try and control your excitement.’
He peeked into the pot. ‘Is that ham ready yet, Dad? I’m starving.’
Seán shrugged. ‘She’ll be back in a minute.’
Ollie flopped down on a chair. ‘So, Ted, is Colin with you? He owes me a fiver since the wedding.’
She pointed outside. ‘He’s on the phone to Diana. Something about Oscar’s birthday.’
Colin’s curly head passed the window sporadically as he chatted at breakneck speed with his mother.
Helen’s car pulled up outside.
‘Thank God,’ said Ollie, hearing the roar of the engine. ‘I’ve been waiting for a ham sandwich all day.’
‘Darling!’ exclaimed Helen, arriving into the kitchen with two big bags. ‘Congratulations on your new job!’
Lydia rushed up and hugged her fiercely. ‘It’s a miracle, isn’t it?’
‘A miracle,’ echoed Ollie, smirking.
Helen kissed her head. ‘I’m so proud of you. What great news to arrive home from holiday to!’ She started emptying the bags. ‘Why is it always the same? I go to Lidl for one thing and end up buying a trolley-load.’
Lydia started packing away the groceries. ‘Well, I can see why you’d need cooking chocolate and buttermilk. Tomato ketchup is always useful. So is prosciutto.’ She paused. ‘But an electric kitchen-roll dispenser?’
‘It’s so handy!’ Her mother blushed and yanked it out of her hand. ‘The wooden one is always missing and this looks so professional.’
Seán Kelly snorted. ‘What rubbish, Helen! How many of those yokes have we out in the garage?’
Ollie put his arm around his mother. ‘Leave my ma alone. She’s the best.’
‘Oh, Ollie,’ she gushed, ‘you are so sweet!’
‘Is the ham ready yet?’ he added, nodding in the direction of the hob. ‘I’m starving.’
‘Coming right up,’ she answered, setting to work.
Lydia stuck her tongue out at her brother. ‘Mama’s pet,’ she mouthed.
‘Blah, blah,’ he mouthed back.
‘Hi, all!’ announced Colin, closing the door behind him. ‘Long time no see.’
‘Colin, darling! Good to see you. Are you hungry?’ Helen offered him her cheek and he kissed it warmly.
‘No, I’m cool. I had a big breakfast grace à Val this morning. He fried up the works, I swear. Skye at the gym is going to kill me.’ He patted his stomach.
‘Alannah never cooks,’ reflected Ollie miserably. ‘Mum, if it wasn’t for you, I’d waste away.’
‘You know there’s always a hot meal for you here,’ she said seriously. ‘I’d hate to think of you starving in that apartment of yours.’
Ollie blew her a kiss and winked at Lydia. ‘That’s how it’s done,’ he mouthed.
‘Bite me,’ she mouthed back.
Colin peered over Seán’s shoulder. ‘I may be wrong, Uncle Seán, but I’m pretty sure number five goes there and there.’ He pointed to two empty squares on the puzzle.
‘Colin!’ Seán threw his pen down in exasperation.
‘He hates when people interfere,’ said Lydia patting her cousin’s arm. ‘Don’t take it personally.’
Helen heaved the ham joint out of the pot and placed it on a platter. She started to cut the rind off. There was a smell of bay leaves and apples.
‘Is that cider?’ asked Colin, looking at the remaining contents of the pot.
<
br /> ‘Yes,’ answered Helen. ‘I always boil it in cider. It has a nice flavour.’
Ollie groaned and clutched his stomach. ‘Hurry up. I’m dying here.’
Lydia picked up her bag and waved at everyone. ‘I’m just going up to my room.’
‘See you later, honey,’ said Helen smiling. ‘Congrats again.’
She paused outside her door and rested her head against the frame. The journey up the stairs had been a painful one. Every step held a memory; even the landing would never be the same again.
Her hand turned the doorknob and the door opened to reveal a room frozen in time. She stared at the unmade bed, the clothes on the floor and the drawn curtains. The blankets were in the same position they had been the morning they had left. She threw herself down on the bed and buried her face in the pillow, searching for his scent, yearning for a trace of their love.
Colin found her sobbing, a pillow clutched to her breast as she rocked to and fro. His heart constricted.
‘Lydia,’ he whispered. ‘Lyd, you have to stop. Your mum will notice.’
She looked up at him with haunted eyes. ‘You’re so right,’ she agreed. ‘It’s just I remember sometimes. I try to block it out but sometimes it comes flooding back.’
‘Auntie Hel wants to know if you’d like a ham sandwich?’ He held up a plate.
‘No, I’m okay.’ She pulled herself up into a sitting position.
‘Lydia, you do remember that Sam and Craig are calling over later?’ he continued gently. ‘Sam will know something is up if you’re all puffy-eyed.’
‘I know, I know.’ She rubbed her nose with her sleeve. ‘I’m fine.’
He opened the curtains. ‘You have to forget him, Lyd.’
‘I know.’
‘He’s getting married next week.’
She choked on a sob. ‘I know,’ she repeated.
‘Sam and Craig are flying out in a few days. She will be talking about it later. Can you handle it?’
‘I can.’ She raised her head and met his dubious gaze. ‘I can do this. Hopefully Sam will never hear of this. I’m banking on the fact that no one will mention it at the wedding.’
‘They won’t,’ said Colin firmly. ‘It would be entirely inappropriate.’
‘She’d kill me.’
‘He squeezed her hand. ‘You’re right. She’d lose the plot if she knew you fell for him again. Not just because of Charlotte, but because she saw how it affected you last time.’ He rubbed her arm comfortingly.
‘Let’s go downstairs,’ she sniffed, straightening her shoulders. ‘I think I might have some ham after all.’
‘That’s a great idea.’ His eyes were warm.
Chapter 48
Later that evening, Samantha and Craig called over.
‘The newlyweds!’ exclaimed Helen, opening her arms for a hug. ‘You both look amazing!’
Samantha hugged her tightly. ‘It’s so nice to see you. How was Mallorca?’
Helen laughed. ‘Wonderful. We hired a little car and toured the island. Seán drove like a lunatic, needless to say. I’m lucky to be back in one piece.’
Craig produced a bottle of champagne from under his arm. ‘We have loads left over from the wedding so we thought we’d bring a bottle over,’ he said, smiling.
‘Is it chilled?’ enquired Colin. ‘I can only drink it chilled.’
Samantha glared at him. ‘Don’t drink it then.’
‘You are so tanned!’ gasped Colin, ignoring her. ‘Craig, that white shirt is divine.’
Craig poured the golden liquid into the waiting flutes. Two inevitably overflowed but Colin was on hand with a cloth to mop up the excess.
‘I come prepared,’ he said, wiping the counter clean. ‘Val can never manage it either.’
Samantha’s rings glittered and shone in the light. She looked incredible; her skin was a butterscotch colour and her hair had streaks of blond. She was dressed in a simple turquoise sundress, and her manicured toes peeped out of white strappy sandals.
‘Italy was a-maz-ing,’ she enthused. ‘We had such a laugh, didn’t we, Craig?’
‘It was great craic, alright,’ he agreed, sipping his champagne. ‘We didn’t have one day of bad weather.’
‘Not one,’ Sam repeated. ‘It was a case of going to the pool, drinking cocktails, eating pizza and chilling out.’
‘Well, except for those sightseeing days,’ interrupted Craig.
Sam glared at him.
‘I mean, we packed a lot in,’ he amended.
‘Education, Craig,’ she replied haughtily. ‘How could we not visit Rome and Pompeii?’
Helen took out her camera. ‘Will you all pose for me?’ she asked.
Ollie jumped to attention. ‘Anything for you, Ma. Come on, Ted, get up!’
They all lined up and Lydia forced a smile.
Flash, flash, went the camera.
‘So, when are you off to New York?’ Helen asked Samantha conversationally.
Lydia hung her head, studying her shoes.
‘Oh, in a few days. I’m so excited for Charlotte. She emailed me yesterday asking about the chocolates we had with the coffee course. I told her it was probably too late but …’
Lydia zoned out. Colin looked at her in pity. He was at a loss at what to do; only he knew the truth. Everyone else was oblivious. How he wished that Molly were home.
‘It’s like an extension of the honeymoon,’ said Seán. ‘You’ll never go back to normal.’
‘I know,’ agreed Craig. ‘The thought of the office is not appealing.’
Lydia focused on the shelf of books by the window. She prayed that the conversation would change direction.
‘So, Lyd, I heard you’re gainfully employed?’ Samantha beamed at her.
‘Me? What?’ She came back to earth.
‘I heard that Adam gave you a writing position. You must be delighted.’ She smiled at her warmly.
‘Oh, I am.’ She forced a smile. ‘About time!’
‘You took the words out of my mouth,’ said Ollie patting her on the back. ‘We thought it would never happen.’
Lydia punched him in the arm. ‘Watch it!’
‘A toast!’ said Seán, holding up his glass. ‘To Sam and Craig!’
‘Sam and Craig!’ they all echoed dutifully.
‘To Lydia!’ added Helen.
‘To Lydia!’ they chanted.
She raised her glass. ‘To me!’ she added, knocking it back.
The week passed in a blur. Adam was a tough boss who expected a lot from his team. Her first draft of an article on internet dating was emailed back almost immediately with a series of exclamation marks. Lydia took it that he wasn’t pleased. Two attempts later and she received a short email indicating his satisfaction.
Samantha and Craig had flown out to New York in tearing spirits. Unaware of the drama between Luca and Lydia, Samantha had been quite vocal about the upcoming nuptials. In her opinion, everyone had been friendly at her wedding, so the air had been cleared. She now felt comfortable talking about Charlotte to Lydia.
Lydia smiled at appropriate times and nodded when required, but inside she was destructing slowly. She nearly screamed when she heard the story about Céline du Maurier’s custom-made Manolo Blahnik shoes. She felt her eyes fill with unwanted tears when Samantha informed her of the dream honeymoon to Hawaii that Luca had booked. Colin had been around most of the time to deflect the conversation. But not all the time. It was like rubbing salt onto the wound; those gods were playing with her again, pulling her strings like she was a puppet.
Now she was knee-deep in an article on period pains. It was Friday and the office was buzzing with the promise of the weekend. However, she felt exhausted and nauseated. She had even refused coffee when Suze came on her rounds.
Colin poked his head around the corner. ‘Jeez, Lyd. You look like crap, girl.’
‘I feel it.’ She rubbed her temple. ‘I think it was that Thai curry last night.’
He pu
t his hand on her forehead. ‘You feel all clammy. It must be all the stress. Go home – Adam won’t mind.’
She groaned. ‘I can’t take more time off. He’ll fire me.’ She rested her throbbing head on the desk and groaned. ‘He’s expecting that period-pain draft by Monday morning.’
‘Val is at home practising his lines. He’ll look after you. Go on!’ Colin had his hands on his hips. ‘You’ll infect the office!’
‘Oh, all right.’ She picked up her bag and her phone. ‘Is Adam around?’
‘You go,’ ordered Colin. ‘I’ll let him know.’
She nodded and waved. ‘I won’t kiss you in case I infect you.’
‘Cheers, Lyd. I’ll see you when I get home.’
As she left the office, she noticed the calendar on the wall. It read the thirteenth of July: the day before Luca’s wedding day. She steeled herself to cope. In a way, she was dying for it all to be over. The thought if it was killing her. At least when it was all over, the fear would be gone. His marriage would be a reality and she could move on.
