‘Good,’ Mr Pervaiz says, pouring chai. ‘We don’t want them here causing trouble.’
‘What happened? Were they attacked?’ Shahana sinks onto a cushion.
‘Some men bombed it, then there was fighting and of course the army had to come to finish it.’ Mr Pervaiz sighs. ‘There is always trouble where there are militants.’
Mr Nadir. Just as Shahana thinks it her gaze meets Zahid’s and she realises that, like her, he is worried for Amaan. She leans closer to him. ‘Amaan came to rescue me but I don’t know how he knew I was in the shop.’ She whispers it and hopes Mr Pervaiz doesn’t hear her over at the stove.
‘Tanveer came here before he went to Mrs Sheikh’s and told me where you were.’
‘Was it you who told Amaan?’
‘Ji, you said he could be trusted and I hoped you were right. There was nothing else to do. But now . . . ’ He leaves the words unsaid but Shahana knows what they are. Because of her, Amaan’s life is in danger. ‘Mr Pervaiz couldn’t go to the cloth shop. I think Mr Nadir has some power over him, but he heard what was going to happen to you and he hired a jeep to Athmuqam.’
‘For the police.’ Shahana stops whispering and turns to where Mr Pervaiz is putting noon chai on a tray for them. ‘Mr Pervaiz, it was you who fetched the police, wasn’t it? You saved me.’
He won’t look at her. He takes some biscuits from a packet. ‘It was a little thing only,’ he says. But it isn’t a little thing at all. If Mr Nadir knew he was involved, Mr Pervaiz or his business could be affected. Amaan would have had a difficult time freeing her if there were no police to threaten Mr Nadir with. He may have had to fire his gun, and then the villagers may have attacked him. Now it seems that Mr Nadir has rallied some men to do that anyway. Shahana hopes Amaan got away and that the other militants think he is lost in the fighting, and won’t hunt him down.
She looks up to see Zahid watching her.
‘Shahana, Veer,’ he says firmly, as if the words are difficult to think about. ‘I must leave today. The army doctor told me something important.’
Shahana wonders if he means his heart.
‘There are unmarked graves across the LoC. I will go there first and say a prayer for my father.’
‘You won’t know if he is there,’ Shahana says.
‘Maybe not, but I will pray the prayer. Then I will return to my mother. She probably thinks I am dead too.’
Shahana nods at him. ‘That is a good thing to do.’ She hopes the pride she feels for him shines from her eyes.
He draws Tanveer closer. ‘I want to stay with you, Veer,’ he says, ‘but I am my mother’s only son. You understand that, don’t you?’
At first Tanveer is quiet and Shahana holds her breath. Always she has worried about this moment. Then Tanveer gives a nod. ‘Aunty Rabia is adopting Shahji and me.’
Shahana is proud to hear him so brave, showing Zahid that they will be okay.
‘I am glad to hear it.’
When they have drunk the chai, Zahid says, ‘I am going to study – I want to change things, not sit all day smoking a hookah like my cousins.’
She nods at him, not wanting to leave. ‘Me too,’ she says.
‘Live well, Shahana.’
‘And you, Zahid.’ His name slips out of her mouth like a sigh.
Their words mean little; the meaning is in their eyes. Shahana hopes hers show how much she will miss him.
Chapter 29
When Shahana and Tanveer return to Aunty Rabia’s it is lunchtime, but the house is quiet. They creep into the big room in case Aunty Rabia is asleep, but she and Ayesha are sitting together on the bed. Ayesha raises her head and Shahana can see the tear tracks on her face. Shahana rushes to her. ‘What is the matter?’
Ayesha opens the computer beside her and shows Shahana an official website. ‘The government has posted a list of men who have died in police or army custody. It is a small list, but it is a start.’
‘And?’ Shahana is feeling the fear that Ayesha must have felt when she saw the list.
‘Papa’s name is on it.’ Ayesha’s voice turns into a squeak and she hides her face in Aunty Rabia’s chest. Shahana puts the computer on the floor and sits beside Ayesha, slipping an arm around her. Then she has an awful thought. Will this upset Aunty Rabia so much that she will never go outside?
‘I’m so sorry,’ Shahana says. She stumbles over the words and wonders if Zahid’s father’s name is on a list in Kashmir, too. Tanveer sits on the floor and lays his head in Ayesha’s lap.
Ayesha sits up straighter with a hand on Tanveer’s hair. ‘We suspected it.’
‘Yes,’ Aunty Rabia says.
Shahana watches her to see if she will say more.
‘Now we can have the funeral at least. The best thing would have been to have him returned to us, but this is still better than not knowing at all.’
That afternoon, just as if he had died that very day, Aunty Rabia, Ayesha, Shahana and Tanveer walk with Mr Pervaiz and the mullah to the cemetery. They have no body wrapped in the calico cloth that Mr Pervaiz carries in front of them, but in it is a photo of Ayesha’s father, verses from the Quran, and letters that Ayesha and Aunty Rabia wrote to him to say how they feel.
Other people, mostly women from the village, follow them. Usually men go to funerals but there are more women than men now. If Mr Nadir is there, Shahana doesn’t notice – she keeps her head covered and watches the ground, which is like ice. It is a good thing they only have a small bundle to bury. It would have taken a huge machine to dig a bigger hole.
Afterwards, while Aunty Rabia is speaking to some ladies for the first time in two years, Shahana takes Tanveer aside and shows him where their family grave-site is. Since Nana-ji died she has never visited, never wanted to be reminded of how they all died. ‘This is where Ummie and Abu are,’ she says. ‘And Irfan.’ She stops.
‘And here is Nana-ji,’ Tanveer says. ‘I remember.’
Her eyes water as she realises it is almost a year since he died. ‘It will be different now, Tanveer. We will be able to study and do all the things Ummie and Abu and Nana-ji wished for us to do.’
‘Shahji, will you call me Veer now?’
He sounds older and it takes her a moment to answer. ‘As you wish – Veer.’
‘Can we look at Nana-ji’s house again?’
‘We will go tomorrow, inshallah.’
The next day, Shahana and Tanveer leave Ayesha and Aunty Rabia in the house to grieve with some village women, and walk across the log bridge. The water is iced over on the sides, with a narrow stream rushing down the middle. It wouldn’t be good to fall in there today; they are approaching the last sister of winter, the coldest and deadliest of all. They climb the lower slopes of the mountain; crocus leaves are shooting up through the thinner snow and there are buds on the chinar trees. The almonds are already in pink blossom. They pass the spring and Nana-ji’s rosebushes, then they stop in shock.
‘Where is the house?’ Tanveer cries.
They run up the logs, but that is all there is. The house has fallen in on itself. It looks like a wood pile ready for the fire. Someone has thrown a grenade in it.
‘The militants. Did they do this? Or did it happen in the fighting?’ Tanveer asks.
‘I don’t think so. It’s too far away from the camp.’ People will say it was the militants, of course. No one will point the finger at the person Shahana thinks has ordered this. Did he hope they’d be there and be killed? Or is it a reminder that he is still powerful and can do anything he wants?
‘Come,’ she says, her voice flat. ‘We’ll go back. There is nothing here for us now.’
‘Wait.’ Tanveer runs to where the other side of the house was. ‘Shahji, look.’
She makes her way through the snow to see what he has found. He is crouching over the ground. ‘It’s the potato we planted, Zahid and me. It’s grown.’
Tears flood her eyes as she sees the lone shoot. Such a tiny strip of green in a white l
andscape. Tanveer stands up. ‘I will check if it survives and when I am grown, I will rebuild Nana-ji’s house.’ He stands there with his legs apart, just like the day he asked her to save Zahid. Watching him, she thinks how there are shadows, things that have to be lived with, yet there is also light.
She draws him close to her and feels the love swelling in her chest. It hurts, as if her heart isn’t used to stretching so wide. ‘That will be good, Veer.’
He takes her hand and they walk past the spring, down the mountain towards the log bridge.
Author’s note
For ten years I worked as an aid worker in the Middle East and most of that time was spent in Khyber Pakhtunkhwa in Northern Pakistan. We lived in Abbottabad close to Azad Kashmir, but we were not allowed to cross the border. It wasn’t until 2006 when I was on an Asialink Writing Fellowship, and the border opened for aid workers helping with the aftermath of the 2005 earthquake, that I was able to visit Muzaffarrabad in Azad Kashmir. There was a huge amount of damage, but I could see it had once been a beautiful place. Little is written in papers about how the Kashmiri conflict affects children, but there are some reports on the Web that can be accessed. I wanted to tell these children’s stories, albeit fictitiously, so other young people in peaceful countries like Australia can understand and care. And maybe, as Ayesha says, knowing these stories can help.
The war over Kashmir is the longest-running conflict in the world today, and possibly the least well known or understood. For centuries Kashmir had a culture that included many faiths. This culture is called Kashmiriyat and it managed to combine the diverse faiths in harmony and tolerance. Muslim lived next door to Hindu and they respected each other’s faiths and festivals. Included were Buddhists, Hindus, Sufi, Sikhs and Muslims – it was like a brotherhood to fight the isolation of the high mountain region.
The Kashmiri conflict is a difficult one to write about as there are many different points of view. India believes all Kashmir is part of India and calls Azad Kashmir ‘Pakistani-occupied Kashmir’; Pakistan believes all of Kashmir was meant to be part of Pakistan due to the 1947 Partition and calls Jammu and Kashmir ‘Indian-occupied Kashmir’. The Kashmiri people themselves have differing points of view, but many would prefer to have freedom, independence and self-government without interference from either India or Pakistan. Zahid calls his homeland Kashmir, the name it was always called.
Historical details of the conflict differ according to what nationality the writer is, and accounts are often contradictory. However, it can be said that this conflict began in 1947 and has caused two major wars between India and Pakistan (1947 and 1965) and almost caused another in 1999. In 1988 Kashmiri militants committed to independence launched attacks against Indian rule. Other jihadi militants, supplied with training and arms by Pakistan, infiltrated Kashmir and joined in the fighting. Militant groups are divided between fighting for independence from India or fighting for for becoming part of Pakistan. India constructed the barrier or fence along the Line of Control (LoC) which runs along the border between Azad Kashmir and Jammu and Kashmir to stop foreign militants from infiltrating Kashmir. The barrier was finished in 2004.
The ratio of troops to civilians in Kashmir is the highest in the world, with 450 000 to 750 000 Indian troops employed.1 There are many widows and half-widows (those women whose husbands are missing), and the children suffer, as Shahana shows. Besides the conflict there are also those who prey upon the disadvantaged, and many orphans are sold into forced labour, kidnapped or become victims of violence and abuse. Boys face recruitment and girls face early marriage. Children are disillusioned by the violence and have many health problems, including post-traumatic stress disorder. Many sources say there are over 100 000 orphans in Kashmir but the UK-based NGO Save the Children recently stated that the number of orphans in Kashmir is as high as 214 000.2 Azad Kashmir has set up camps for refugees and orphans from Kashmir and Jammu, and Kashmir has many orphanages.
One fourteen-year-old Kashmiri said, ‘I want the government and opposition groups to avoid destroying the lives of children by depriving them of their parents.’ This boy wants to be a doctor to help other orphans.
Central Asia Insititute, a non-profit organisation, believes the way to peace and hope is through education. CAI is building schools in Azad Kashmir. Read about this in Greg Mortenson’s Stones into Schools (Penguin 2009, and at ikat.org). UNICEF is also building schools in Azad Kashmir and opened sixteen in 2011 (The Express Tribune, 26 May, 2011). Check out UNICEF’s work to help children in Kashmir at unicef.org.au.
1 ‘Responding to Gendered Violence in Kashmir’ (Association of Parents of Disappeared Persons, July 2011).
2 Altaf, Sana. ‘Thousands orphaned by poverty in Kashmir’ (Inter Press Service, 9 January 2013).
Timeline
1947 Partition of Indian subcontinent: Union of India and Dominion of Pakistan.
Indo–Pakistani War of 1947 First war over Kashmir. The Maharajah of the state of Jammu and Kashmir asks India for help, relinquishing control over defence, communication and foreign affairs until a plebiscite can be held. Ceasefire line divides Kashmir.
1948 India takes dispute over Kashmir territory to the United Nations Security Council. Pakistan and India agree to withdraw troops behind ceasefire line.
1949 Ceasefire results in Indian control of most of the Kashmir valley. Pakistan controls Azad Kashmir and northern territories.
1957 India declares the State of Jammu and Kashmir an integral part of India.
Indo–Pakistani War of 1965 Kashmiris stage anti-India riots. Pakistan launches ‘Operation Grand Slam’ to capture India-controlled Kashmir. Violence erupts in Kashmir Valley.
1966 Kashmiri nationalists form Jammu and Kashmir National Liberation Front (NLF).
1972 Simla Agreement: Line of Control (LoC) is the redesignated ceasefire line. Fighting continues – LoC now one of the most violent and dangerous borderlines in the world.
1987–1990 Kashmir Insurgency: Revolts by young Kashmiris recruited by renamed Jammu and Kashmir National Liberation Front (JKNLF).
1990s Estimated 500 000 Indian security forces deployed in the Kashmir Valley, increased violence by both sides, tens of thousands of civilian casualties. Almost a million Kashmiris protest against Indian occupation. Construction of the 740 km Indian LoC separation barrier begins, and is finished in 2004.
1998 Both India and Pakistan conduct nuclear tests.
1999 Kargil War: Armed conflict between India and Pakistan along the LoC results in more than one thousand casualties. Pakistan withdraws under international pressure.
2000 Unilateral ceasefire declared in Jammu and Kashmir. Peace talks begin in Srinagar to end the five decades of hostilities but are short-lived as fighting begins after two weeks.
2001 Two Pakistani militant groups blamed for a deadly attack on the Indian Parliament.
India calls upon Pakistan to close its terrorist training camps. Troops mass at the LoC and the worst fighting occurs as India shells Pakistani military positions.
2003 India and Pakistan agree to a ceasefire across the LoC.
2005 Pakistan earthquake – epicentre near Muzaffarabad, Azad Kashmir: 79 000 dead, 106 000 injured, 6000 schools destroyed.
2006 Second round of Indo–Pakistani peace talks.
2007 Amnesty International reports gross human rights violations by both sides.
2010 Kashmir unrest: protests in Kashmir Valley in Indian-administered Kashmir result in 112 deaths. Killing of young Kashmiri student Tufail Ahmad Mattoo spikes further protests, with more than 270 Indian security officers attacked by stone-throwing mobs of youths.
An amnesty for fighters from Indian-administered Kashmir is announced, allowing many to return home.
2012 Tourists begin to return to Kashmir despite continued ceasefire violations at the India–Pakistan border.
Glossary
abu; abu-ji dad, father; dear or respected father
accha good
ach
kan knee-length jacket or coat
a jao come
Angrezi English
Alhamdulillah praise be to God
aloo potato
assalamu alaikum peace be upon you
azadi freedom
azan call to prayer
baitho sit
beti daughter
bijily electricity
bismillah in the name of God
chai; noon chai spiced tea; salt tea
charpoy a string bed
chello go
chitta leopard
chup quiet
dekshi cooking pot
dhal lentil curry
dupatta a long silk scarf
Eid ul Fitr a religious holiday to mark the end of Ramadan
haram forbidden
inshallah if God wills
Jahanam hell
jaldi quickly
janab sir
jawan a teenage boy
ji; ji hahn yes
ji nahin no
jinn a spirit which can be good or evil, and take human or animal form
kangri fire pot
khana food
kharmosh quiet
Khuda hafiz goodbye, may God be your protector
koi hai? is anyone there?
kurta a long shirt
lota jug
mehndi henna
mullah Muslim religious leader or priest
nahin no
namdah felt rug
nana; nana-ji mother’s father; dear or respected mother’s father
nay no
pheran woollen winter robe
qameez long shirt or tunic
roti bread
saag spinach
samovar copper kettle with burning coals in a central cylinder to heat water or chai
shalwar loose trousers
shukriya thank you
shikara wooden oar-driven boat
teik hai okay; fine
ummie; ummie-ji mum, mother; dear or respected mother
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