by Kiera Cass
“I know it’s a challenge even when you’re rested, but go and put yourself together,” Etan said sarcastically. “It’s going to be a long day.”
I crossed my arms. “Very funny. For goodness’ sake, don’t you shave?”
I went around him and into my room, amazed that we’d actually done it. We’d gotten back home, and no one knew, and we could just keep moving forward. I tore up the letter I’d written the night before and threw the scraps into the fireplace for kindling. Maybe I’d tell them of my moment of weakness one day when it was far behind us and we’d won our battle. For now, I needed to splash some water on my face and change into a clean dress. It was going to be an exhausting day.
Nine
I WENT DOWN TO BREAKFAST with bleary eyes, fully expecting to have an opportunity to practice my newly made bargain with Etan. Only, he wasn’t there.
“Are you all right?” Mother wondered, looking me over.
“Yes. Why? What’s wrong?” I asked a little too quickly.
“No reason. You just seem tired.”
“Didn’t sleep well,” I admitted.
“Well, we’ll take it easy today,” Aunt Jovana insisted. “I have several letters to write, and I desperately need your and Scarlet’s help. If Etan’s right, we have some dear friends to inform of . . . recent events.” She did her best to actually avoid the words. I followed her lead.
“I have excellent handwriting,” I told her. “It was the one thing in my academic career Delia Grace praised me for.”
“Oh! That reminds me!” Aunt Jovana stood up and rushed over to a side table. “This came late last night. I didn’t want to wake you. I hope it’s nothing too urgent.” She made a face like she was questioning her choice while I was counting my blessings she’d made the choice she had.
Across the front of the folded paper, the name of Varinger Hall was crossed out, and the words Northcott, Isolte were written beneath it, as that was all anyone at my home had to go on. I didn’t recognize the handwriting.
I broke the unfamiliar seal, going directly to the end to see who it was from. “Nora!”
“Really?” Scarlet asked. “What does she say? I mean, I’m sorry; I don’t want to intrude.”
I looked up from my letter just in time to see Etan walking into the room. The little snake had shaved, and he plopped himself into his chair with a smirk on his face, daring me to say something.
There was a beat of tension at the table as everyone waited for us to continue our fight where they assumed we’d left off. But we’d made our peace, however fragile it might be, and it was time to carry on as best we could.
“I have no secrets from you,” I said to the room at large, hoping Etan took note. I cleared my throat and went to the letter. “‘Dear Hollis, for goodness’ sake, come back.’”
I had to pause and laugh, and it lifted my spirits to see Scarlet smile at that greeting. “‘I don’t intend to make light of things. I know that you have been through something unspeakable, and it’s still unbelievable to me that your parents are gone. I imagine you need comfort right now, and if you were close, I would be that for you. I hope you’re finding it in some way at your family home. All the same, I so wish you were here.
“‘I don’t think I realized before how much joy you brought to the palace. Delia Grace is doing her best to fill your shoes (ah, your shoes!).” I stopped to giggle, but only Mother and Scarlet understood the joke. “‘But she’s no Hollis. I miss your jokes and your laughter . . .’” I had to pause and take a breath. “‘. . . and I hope you miss mine, too.
“‘I don’t mean to take digs at Delia Grace. I think we always knew she was ambitious, but the way she’s wormed her way into the king’s affections has me . . . uncomfortable. She and I are still on speaking terms, and I have you to thank for that. But I worry how things will be if she’s ever queen.’”
“What is it?” Mother asked, taking in the concern on my face.
“Nothing. . . . It’s just, I knew Delia Grace always hoped to be on Jameson’s arm. I wonder what it is she’s doing that would make anyone raise eyebrows. And it makes me wonder about that soldier at the border who said he wasn’t true to her. She had so many plans, knew how to play the game . . .” I went back to the letter.
“‘Perhaps I’m worried for nothing. Perhaps I’m just tired of the tension of court.
“‘Sometimes the king still talks of you. Someone will do something, and it will remind him of you, and he feels obligated to tell the story in full. How you . . .’” I blushed, giving myself away.
Etan scoffed. “No secrets, indeed.”
I took a deep breath. “‘How you kissed him in the room that held all the royal jewels.’ Which isn’t how that happened, by the way,” I said, looking up again. “We were in his rooms, and he kissed me. ‘And then that story will lead into how you used berries to paint your lips once. And then that story will lead into how you used berries as ammunition on me. I can see Delia Grace dying inside when he does it, which is part of what makes me nervous. She seems so uneasy, even with you gone.
“‘Come visit us soon. Even if you have no intentions of winning the king over (which I’m still hoping for, I confess), I think it will set her at ease if you come and go and nothing happens. She will see you as our dear old joyful Hollis, and maybe we can all keep moving on. I don’t know how your days are going, but I hope you will find time to write me soon and tell me of all your adventures. I’m not sure if you’ve stayed in contact with the Eastoffe family after what I heard happened, but if you are, please tell the Lady Scarlet I send my best dance steps her way.’” I looked up, seeing this single line brought tears to Scarlet’s eyes. Happy ones. “‘I wish you well, Hollis. Send me pretty words soon to light up court. Your friend and servant, Nora.’”
I folded the letter, feeling a little warmer inside. It wasn’t exactly a positive update, but it was a comfort all the same. The maid came around, filling cups as the family reflected on the words Nora was kind enough to send.
“Idle gossip,” Etan remarked.
“Not so,” I countered. “It confirmed something for us.”
He squinted at me as I continued. “People in Isolte don’t know what happened to my family, but the people of Coroa do. Seeing as Quinten isn’t their king, perhaps no one fears sharing the story there.”
His shoulders slumped as he considered this. “You’re right.”
Uncle Reid stopped midchew to gape at his son.
And the maid poured ale into my cup.
And that all felt as warming as the letter had.
Uncle Reid cleared his throat, looking as if he wanted to preserve the rare peaceful moment between us. “What are your plans for the day, son?”
“Sleeping. Rotten night.”
I was inclined to look around the table, to see if anyone was attempting to link his sleepless night to mine, and hoping that, if they did, they didn’t draw the wrong conclusion. It was unlikely, as we had been at each other’s throats last they knew. In the end, I only glanced at Scarlet, and I could see her mind was working, but I went back to my food, refusing to give her anything to feed that fire.
“When’s the next bread day?” I asked, needing to get our minds on a new subject.
“Saturday,” Aunt Jovana said. “Today my biggest tasks are those letters, and I’ve almost finished tailoring a dress for you, Hollis, that I’ll need you to try on.”
“Certainly.”
“Son, would you be willing to come with me to visit the Biermans today?” Uncle Reid asked. “Their oldest is talking of moving.”
Up to this point, Etan’s days had consisted of following me around like an obnoxious shadow, but it seemed today would finally be a change of pace. “Sure. I haven’t seen him in ages. Where is Ash thinking of moving to? Is he planning not to farm anymore?”
The morning post had arrived, and a maid walked in with another letter and presented it to Uncle Reid as he answered Etan. “I don’t think so. I think
young Ash wants to try his hand at a new trade. It’s making his parents nervous.”
“Young Ash,” Etan repeated with a smirk and a shake of his head. “We’re the same age.”
“Yes. Yes, you are.”
As if he had no cares for whatever the letter might say, Uncle Reid continued giving his son a knowing smile as he reached up to take it. But both his and Etan’s faces went dark at exactly the same moment, prompting me to speak.
“What is it?” I asked.
Etan sighed heavily, answering without breaking his eyes from the letter. “A royal seal.”
Ten
“A ROYAL SEAL?” SCARLET ASKED, her voice pitching higher. She was simultaneously swallowing and bracing herself.
Uncle Reid scanned the message quickly, sharing the news as he went.
“We are summoned to the palace. Prince Hadrian is getting married at the end of the week. There is to be a ball and a tournament with the wedding capping off the festivities.” He sighed. “Well, that’s that.”
Everyone at the table looked dejected—or worse, terrified—but I sat up taller.
“This is great news!”
Etan’s eyes were the first to look at me in disbelief. “How is our enemy finally managing to marry off his son and prolong their line a good thing?”
“You keep saying you’d have support if you had undeniable proof. The best place you could ever find it would be in the castle. And we just got invited there.”
Uncle Reid smirked while Etan sank in his chair, irritated again that I was right.
“Bravo, Hollis. That’s the kind of attitude we all need to have. This trip is a great opportunity. We will listen to learn what those at court have heard, see what we can find ourselves, and gather our support. I fear this may be our last chance.”
“What do you need from us?” Mother asked.
“Active hands and ears. Speak to everyone and try to learn if anyone’s seen anything with their own eyes. Garner favor. We must be present and in the thick of everything. It will both make Quinten see us as submissive supporters and allow us room to finalize our plans. We also need to present a united front, to show that we are not broken despite our trials. To that end,” he said, leaning forward and looking to me first, then Etan. “You will be escorting Hollis to every event.”
I watched as Etan’s jaw dropped. His eyes darted back and forth, clearly trying to muster up an excuse.
“Whatever you’re thinking, let it go. Everyone is aware of your feelings toward Coroa. If you can be not just civil but kind to her, that will make a bigger statement about the unity of our family than any speech I could offer. So, you will be her escort, and I will hear nothing more about it.”
He looked at me, and I stared back at him. Whatever peace we’d agreed to, this might stretch it past its breaking point. But, seeing as we were on a mission here, I didn’t think there was a way around the arrangement.
Etan’s shoulders sagged. “Yes, Father.”
Uncle Reid looked at me, and I merely nodded. “Good. We’ll leave tomorrow, so you’d all best start packing.”
I was gripped with panic, and I could feel my body getting tense over the prospect of walking into Quinten’s home and court.
“Don’t worry,” Scarlet whispered. “I have dresses you can borrow.”
I smiled and nodded, not even thinking about that. I was going to have to blend in, and there was little chance of that; tight-sleeved gowns were the least of my concerns.
I lay awake in bed for a long time. Even with the exhaustion from my escape attempt the night before, even with a comfortable fire, it was impossible to fall asleep. I worried, perhaps to an irrational degree, what it would be like to face King Quinten tomorrow.
Maybe it was my imagination, but I felt like I could hear Etan next door, pacing at times, then throwing himself on his bed before getting up again. Was he as anxious as I was? Or did the man just never settle?
I gasped a little at the knock on my door, sitting upright.
“Just me,” Scarlet whispered. “See how startling it is?”
I giggled, pulling the blankets back for her to jump in. She lay down, but I stayed sitting up, resting my head on my knees.
“Perhaps we need a special sound. I could hoot like an owl or something before I come in,” I proposed.
“Yes. That will be lovely. Very noble of you,” she offered. “I figured you’d be awake. You all right?”
“No. I’m not. I’m so tired, but my mind is just . . .” It was all such a tangle, but when the words started coming out, so did the truth. “I’m afraid, Scarlet. Unlike you, this is all very new to me. You’ve always had this secret in your pocket, this knowledge of who you are and what it means in this big sweeping story of your kingdom. I’m just a girl who happened to fall in love with a boy . . . and now we’re here, and I don’t know what I’m supposed to do.
“I’m not Isolten; I don’t see how anyone would entrust me—a stranger—with any vital information. And King Quinten disliked me from the start. I have this fear that any role I might have to play in getting justice for Silas is useless. I’m not as brash as Etan or as keenly observant as you. Mother and Uncle Reid are planners, and Aunt Jovana is this quiet sense of calm over everything. What about me?” I asked, finally seeming to put all the jumbled thoughts in my head to a point.
What about me?
Should I have kept running last night despite Etan’s protests? Should I never have come at all? Was there even anything I could do to help us find a solution?
“What, you want to know your role in all this?” she asked.
“Yes! Desperately!”
Scarlet sat up, looking deep into my eyes. “Too bad, because I don’t know.” The matter-of-factness in her face made me want to laugh, which was good as that seemed to be her goal. “Hollis, all I can tell you is that I believe you’re here for a reason. And maybe we don’t know what it is today, but I’m certain that whatever happens, we’ll need you.”
“You think?” I asked, finally lying down.
“I do,” she said, joining me.
We were quiet for a long time, lost in our own thoughts. I liked that about Scarlet, that I could be silent with her.
“I’m trained, Hollis,” she said out of nowhere. “Since I was old enough to carry a sword, I’ve learned to swing one. But when . . .” Her lips started trembling, and I knew then that she was telling the story we all thought she’d never tell. She swallowed and kept going. “When they came in, I couldn’t move to save my life. I can remember that very thought going through my head: if you want to live, you have to move. And I couldn’t.”
I watched as she fidgeted with the edge of the blankets, trying to tame her thoughts.
“They walked in without fanfare. The first few people fell without any sort of fear or anticipation because they were so quiet. No one started running until a few people realized what was happening and started to scream.
“Hollis, I know it was only a few minutes, but it felt so slow. Every day new pieces of the picture fall into place, new memories. Father yelled at Silas to run. But Silas . . . he wouldn’t go. Father grabbed a sword off the wall and went into the fray, and Silas followed right behind him. They took down at least two men that I saw before . . .” She had to pause. “Father went down first. I looked away and then saw Sullivan was jumping in front of me on my right.”
She shook her head. “It’s like they didn’t think a single stab was enough for him. The way they . . . I don’t think I can tell you about all of that.”
“It’s all right. You don’t have to share anything you don’t want to.” I reached out for her hand, and she gave it to me, gripping me with all her might. She took a moment to let out a sob, wiping at her face with the back of her hand. I wondered if she would stop then, she seemed so pained by the memories. But she didn’t.
“I didn’t see what happened to your parents. Honestly, I kept looking for you. I didn’t know you and Mother weren’t in th
ere. My eyes just kept darting across the room, feet planted to the floor. I have pieces of images. A neck. Clutched hair. I remember someone threw a vase. Blood. So much blood.
“They started pouring oil on the floor and ripping down all the tapestries we’d worked so hard to clean and hang. I still can’t remember when I started seeing the fire.
“And then, suddenly, there was someone in front of me, gripping me by my arms. I remember looking down at his hands, thinking they were too big for any human to have. I had bruises from the way he held me later, but I didn’t even feel them at the time. I waited for the sword. But he just kept looking into my eyes, and after studying me for a minute, he grabbed another man in black. The second man looked at me and nodded, and the man who had me by the shoulders shoved me toward the door. After he pushed me, my legs worked enough to get me to the front of the manor. I tripped over Saul on the way out. He was so still, but I didn’t see him until I was on the ground and looked back to see what I’d caught my foot on. I reached back to shake him, but he was already gone.
“By then I had to crawl. I crawled through the front doors and down the steps and into the bushes. My head started racing. I was alone. They let me live, and I couldn’t figure out why. I was prepared to die, Hollis. I always knew it could come. It’s the living when everyone else has left that makes it so hard.”
I nodded. “That I understand.”
Her hands were finally warming up in mine. “My mind was a wreck, but I tried to make a plan. I was asking myself where I could go, what I could do if I was all alone now. I figured I’d have to go back to Isolte. No one looking like me was going to stay in Coroa peacefully on their own. So, I figured I’d steal a horse, go north, and sneak back into Isolte through Bannir. I could live in the country, and no one would know I was an Eastoffe, and I could just grow old. Since I was a little girl, Hollis, I never knew if I’d have a chance to grow old. I am determined now. I will.”
“Of course you will. By the end of this, we’ll have answers, justice. That man will never do this to another living soul,” I vowed.
